Why the sudden desire to open up?

[Davo]

Trench .... Maybe Russia is the go.
Go back on Fdating, find woman your age, southern Russia, maybe Krasnodar region. She should have  a good level of eduction and job. You'll find a genuine woman in a week. Tell her you only want conversation and friendship at first. Skype and message everyday, then pursue like Russian men do.

My mate followed my advice and  had never talked to a Russian woman four months ago. Tonight he got engaged in our country to the most  wonderful woman I've had the pleasure of meeting. He visited her a little over a month ago, she arrived here today. He experienced no scammers, red flags, pro-daters, materialistic woman etc... She even paid  her way to fly here and wouldn't take his money.
They plan to get married in January in her home  city.
I wouldn't have rushed in this quick, but from what I've seen tonight she's a keeper, the local guys half our age were tripping over themselves to check her out, she's stunning. It gives me hope I'm traveling down the right  path : ) 

[msmob]

Why trench needs to get back on a plane and stop theorising 

Russia had it's scam industry centres - but a combination of action taken by the authorities and internet at home / mobile internet saw off 'hairy boris' ' letter scams and marriage agencies - as ladies took control of their profiles and made their own

There are plenty of larger RU ladies - with tats on display... ((

Sochi gets all sorts down on hols and some bods are best left covered up ....  The surf  / sports beaches see the hottest babes

[treadmilldude]

Davo, how old is your friend who just got hitched? How old is the RW he married? Does she have Children, and does he? 4 months....is moving very very very quickly, way too quickly for me. I do know the divorce rate of WM from RWD who marry FSUW is astronomically high. I do not think a 4 month courtship is necessarily conducive to decreasing the likelihood of a divorce in this instance. But to each his own.

I hope he has a wonderful Marriage, she sounds like a very nice person.

[Trenchcoat]

Trench .... Maybe Russia is the go.
Go back on Fdating, find woman your age, southern Russia, maybe Krasnodar region. She should have  a good level of eduction and job. You'll find a genuine woman in a week. Tell her you only want conversation and friendship at first. Skype and message everyday, then pursue like Russian men do.

My mate followed my advice and  had never talked to a Russian woman four months ago. Tonight he got engaged in our country to the most  wonderful woman I've had the pleasure of meeting. He visited her a little over a month ago, she arrived here today. He experienced no scammers, red flags, pro-daters, materialistic woman etc... She even paid  her way to fly here and wouldn't take his money.
They plan to get married in January in her home  city.
I wouldn't have rushed in this quick, but from what I've seen tonight she's a keeper, the local guys half our age were tripping over themselves to check her out, she's stunning. It gives me hope I'm traveling down the right  path : )

I think that is exactly the right sort of advice Davo and one which I will be following. I quite fancy a brief stop over in St. Pete's sometime buthis I think somewhere like Krasnodar off the beaten track is where I should head to be more assured of finding the genuine women I am looking for. I've enjoyed my time in Ukraine despite not finding the relationship I would want but I think it's not the easiest place to find the right woman. Going there again I fear I would just be wasting more precious time & chances on women that don't care about finding a guy for genuine reasons. I'm not surprised your friend got married if a girl is sincere I think a lot of this becomes a whole lot easier.

[msmob]

I think somewhere like Krasnodar...

Too close to me and Sochi ...  Siberia IS off the beaten track and where a high percentage of models are from

[ML]

if a girl is sincere I think a lot of this becomes a whole lot easier.

Once you learn to fake sincerity . . . things go a lot better.

[Trenchcoat]

Too close to me and Sochi ...  Siberia IS off the beaten track and where a high percentage of models are from

Oh Mobe we could do double dates You wouldn't have me sent off to Siberia now would you!

[Davo]

Davo, how old is your friend who just got hitched? How old is the RW he married? Does she have Children, and does he? 4 months....is moving very very very quickly, way too quickly for me. I do know the divorce rate of WM from RWD who marry FSUW is astronomically high. I do not think a 4 month courtship is necessarily conducive to decreasing the likelihood of a divorce in this instance. But to each his own.

**** Edit, sorry treadilldude, I thought I was quoting \ replying to  trench****

I hope he has a wonderful Marriage, she sounds like a very nice person.

**** Edit... Sorry  Treadmilldude, I thought I was replying to trench****
He's 39 and has no children. She's also 39 and has 1 child. I agree, I was worried when he told me he planned to propose, but he seems happy and can't be any worse than his ex wife who was a nightmare and his ex girlfriend who he discovered was using meth.

I don't know how old you are, but according to the woman I talk to, if you're a woman with a child, who's over 35 there is no competition from other men.

 "At my age a lot of married men. be a mistress and take a man from the family, I will not. Those who are divorced, do not want to create a family again. meet for sex is also not for me. Husband I also do not need an alcoholic. In Russia there are more women than men"

 I get the impression they are so appreciative  to talk with a normal man who isn't just after one thing. The woman I talk to, said my approach was spot on, a good relationship starts  from a good friendship.

[BillyB]

I do know the divorce rate of WM from RWD who marry FSUW is astronomically high.

I've been at this place for over 10 years and I have not come to that conclusion.

[Davo]

I've been at this place for over 10 years and I have not come to that conclusion.

I read some stats 6 months ago, that international marriages where the age is 0-2 years, are highly successful. The larger the gap the more instances of divorce. Often women initiated divorced at 40 years old ( this is common in all marriages... Mid life crisis!!  ). I'll see if I can find it.... It's an interesting read

[BillyB]

I read some stats 6 months ago, that international marriages where the age is 0-2 years, are highly successful. The larger the gap the more instances of divorce. Often women initiated divorced at 40 years old ( this is common in all marriages... Mid life crisis!!  ). I'll see if I can find it.... It's an interesting read

Stats are interesting but the most important stat is your own, not other people's. If two good people get together, no matter where they're from, good things happen. Choose wisely and you won't be an ugly statistic.

[treadmilldude]

I read some stats 6 months ago, that international marriages where the age is 0-2 years, are highly successful. The larger the gap the more instances of divorce. Often women initiated divorced at 40 years old ( this is common in all marriages... Mid life crisis!!  ). I'll see if I can find it.... It's an interesting read

Davo, thank you for the kind reply back. You seem like a very kind man (although you do not post much? I think you only have about 20 posts?), and your buddy seems like a high-quality guy as well. I am very sorry he has been through some rough relationships (ex-Wife, last GF is trippin' out on Meth) Wow, I am looking at my watch right now and it is 2:40 AM. I went to bed at 9:00 PM as usual, and set my alarm clock to wake me up at 4:30 AM as usual to go for my 80 minute morning jog to burn body fat and for good overall cardiovascular health. But instead of sleeping till 4:30 AM.....as I sometimes do, I woke up at around 2:30 AM......and just laid there and cannot go back to sleep. It sucks, I need my sleep, but I can't go back to sleep. So I am up, I have taken my 300 mg of caffeine pills to get me revved up. And am going to do my 80 minute run as soon as I get through typing this post out.

Davo, a long time ago, about 3 1/2 to 4 years ago when I first started this adventure, I joined Elenas Models on their 6 month plan. I dunno how much it was as it was so long ago my memory is foggy, but I am thinking something like $500 for the 6 month plan?? Maybe less, maybe more, I can't remember. Anyways, I will say the owner Elena is a very decent, kind woman. I sent her quite a few emails asking her questions about FSU Culture / women as I did not know sites like RUA or RWD even existed. So I basically had to rely on her for about a year as a source for some knowledge. To say I was extremely ignorant of FSU Culture and Women at that time when I was just getting started, would be the understatement of the year. I still consider myself to be extremely green and lacking a great great deal of knowledge and experience in FSU culture and FSU Women, but at least I have expanded my knowledge base a little bit since I joined RWD in, I believe, Feb. 2016 or so. Still so much I need to learn and experience about Belarus and Ukraine, I definitely have no confidence in giving anyone any advice here, you included Davo. So do not think I am trying to advise you or anyone else on what to do, because I am not. I am not foolish enough to try and give you or anyone else any advice, I am not smart enough and I do not have enough knowledge. But I do have a big desire to constantly improve and get better. So that is what I focus on each and every day - improving and getting better.   

Anyways, Elena was always very nice to me and would always email me back and answer my questions. She complimented me several times and told me she could tell that, even though I had no experience raising a child, no experience being a Husband, and zero experience with Slavic women, she could tell my heart was in the right place and I was a genuinely good man. So she provided me with a lot of encouragement.

We exchanged a couple emails concerning the topic of the "age gap" and how it applied to me. She had me thoroughly convinced, from pretty much the very beginning, that large age gaps in international marriages  DO - NOT - WORK........PERIOD.  And it makes perfect sense to me. In my lifetime, the largest age gap I have ever had when dating American girls is about 7 years. Yes, I have never dated an American Girl more than about 7 years younger than me. And I have never wanted to either, I have nothing in common with girls much younger than me. So why then, would I attempt a huge age gap with women in Belarus or Ukraine when I have never once had a large age gap relationship with a US Girl, you know? It would be pretty retarded for an American Man like me, who his entire life has consistently dated women on average about 2 to 3 years younger than me, to suddenly think I have found the miracle, magic bullet, so to speak, that allows me to pursue a woman in the FSU more than about 7 to 8 years younger than myself with success. I am 39, by the way Davo, same age as your friend and his soon-to-be Russian Wife ( )  For me, the youngest woman I am willing to pursue in this adventure is 31. In fact, I am only pursuing 31 and 32 year-old women. (My God there are a CRAPLOAD, thousands upon thousands of thin, skinny, GORGEOUS 31 and 32 year-old women in Minsk and Kiev!!) If she is younger than 31, I am sorry, but I am not interested. Likewise, if she is older than 32, I am also not interested as I am a Man with no Children, and I want to have 2 Kids with the Slavic Woman I end up marrying. A woman older than 32, by the time we date for about 18 months, have our wedding, then get her K1 and bring her over here...and after her being here for at least 2 years so she can be well-acclimated to living in the US.....she is going to be pushing 37 by the time we are both ready to conceive a Child. 37 is a little too old, a little too risky for me. I do not want to take a chance of having a Child with any sort of birth defects due to advanced Maternal Age. So 31 and 32 works out great for me. And, as I am 39, it keeps the age gap nice and reasonable: 7 to 8 years. 

Anyways Davo, check out this link on Elenasmodels website. Elena really does have many years of experience in being a successful matchmaker for WM and FSUW. She has a good number of data points (many successful marriages between WM and FSUW) to back up her claim of  ""The average age difference in successful international couples is 8 years"".

http://blogs.elenasmodels.com/en/age-difference-international-couples/

It's a nice article for you to read, and I would advise you and anyone else to check it out when you have time. I am trying everything I can do to minimize my chance of a divorce. That is one of my very very top priorities - minimize my chance of divorce. Maxx, AKMike, and a few other guys have sent me quite a few PM's in private telling me all about the tremendously high divorce rate over the years of the male members of RWD who married FSUW. Keeping the age gap between 7 to 8 years - I am doing just that, minimizing my chance of divorce.

I applaud your buddy, Davo, who kept the age gap to ZERO years!!  He is a very smart man for doing that, and in doing so, he is greatly minimizing his chance of a divorce. I will keep your friend in my thoughts and prayers Davo, I want him to have a loving, robust, durable marriage that will stand the test of time. God bless your friend Davo, and I can only hope to be as blessed as him some day soon. Take care man.

[msmob]

Someone should mention the likes of Turbo to TMD .... 'period'..  I have a mate 62- married to a thirty-two year old wife- they have two beautiful daughters ...( OK that's not international ) ... there are ( lots ) of exceptions to the 'rule' - if one scratches the surface.

[Trenchcoat]

TMD I've read a fair bit of Elena's advice over time and for a MOB site some of it is decent advice and some of it occasionally more from a MOB site perspective of fulfilling what the men & women they deal with wish to hear. I would say the point she once made of girls in their very late twenties to their thirties being usually the most ready for kids/marriage is probably true. I think the thing with age gap is more a safety feature than anything else as BillyB pointed out to me if you can correctly tell a girl is into you then almost any age could be fine.

The reason I think Elena brings up keeping the age gap relatively close is that she knows a lot of guys will go after the young hotties and unless there is a lot of natural chemistry and perhaps a few other things in the guys favour she's going to take the guy for a ride and it will not end well. It's easy to be taken in if you wish for something so much and the girl fakes up interest in you or is interested because she thinks you are loaded, can use you as a mule etc. I think Elena knows the majority of men looking at FSU dating fall short in a few areas as otherwise they would be dating locally and them going for a lot younger girl is very unlikely to ever work out for them.

For some guys that can bring in a good income on a regular basis, is not so unattractive looking to her that she could never be into him going with a guy like that a girl may well accept an older guy. I get the impression that some girls are well aware that going for an older WM is part of what they are subscribing to in signing up for international dating but do so willingly because they just want to be well provided for - that is there main concern, they do not want a family with a poor guy and have to struggle.

Main problem with this is that as people have told me on here before when you go back to your home country with girl over time it will become apparent where you stand in the pecking order of things. If you bring in a good income consistently then she may not want to kill the goose that lays the golden egg by going elsewhere. If you are not all that well off compared to others then you could just become a stepping stone for her. However, if she is in her thirties (and particularly if she already has a kid or so) she has far fewer options to look around elsewhere. Take the girl in her mid twenties I was knocking around with not so long ago, had I brought her back to UK even for a tourist visa stay at that age and attractive looking she knows she can pull many a man, she can in her home country but they are all just too poor for her around where she lives that is no doubt why she is international dating. Now unless I am assured that this girl is unquestionably 100 percent into me it would be a fools errand to bring her into UK, I would just become the stepping stone and stepped upon Her insistence that she comes to UK first or we don't meet at all just raised the red flag and gave away her true intention. A girl that was truely into me would be wanting to see me again wherever & whenever even I know that.

So I guess what I am saying is thirties is going to be safer terrain but even then some guys can get their fingers burn't with the wrong woman. going for girls in their twenties with a large age gap is possible but you're going to have to make sure you've got all the balls in your court before pressing ahead. Guys like BillyB have enough going for then and are savvy enough to know when it could work. Many of us though with a big age gap could just bump into a girl looking to take advantage and that is where the problem lies I believe.       

[msmob]

Sighs, more Trench relying on third party 'advice' ..

1/ Many of us do not think 'Elena' is behind her site, anymore..

2/ You are just the sort of gullible poster that would swallow the BillyB 'mantra'

[Nightwish]

TMD I've read a fair bit of Elena's advice over time and for a MOB site some of it is decent advice and some of it occasionally more from a MOB site perspective of fulfilling what the men & women they deal with wish to hear. I would say the point she once made of girls in their very late twenties to their thirties being usually the most ready for kids/marriage is probably true. I think the thing with age gap is more a safety feature than anything else as BillyB pointed out to me if you can correctly tell a girl is into you then almost any age could be fine.

The reason I think Elena brings up keeping the age gap relatively close is that she knows a lot of guys will go after the young hotties and unless there is a lot of natural chemistry and perhaps a few other things in the guys favour she's going to take the guy for a ride and it will not end well. It's easy to be taken in if you wish for something so much and the girl fakes up interest in you or is interested because she thinks you are loaded, can use you as a mule etc. I think Elena knows the majority of men looking at FSU dating fall short in a few areas as otherwise they would be dating locally and them going for a lot younger girl is very unlikely to ever work out for them.

For some guys that can bring in a good income on a regular basis, is not so unattractive looking to her that she could never be into him going with a guy like that a girl may well accept an older guy. I get the impression that some girls are well aware that going for an older WM is part of what they are subscribing to in signing up for international dating but do so willingly because they just want to be well provided for - that is there main concern, they do not want a family with a poor guy and have to struggle.

Main problem with this is that as people have told me on here before when you go back to your home country with girl over time it will become apparent where you stand in the pecking order of things. If you bring in a good income consistently then she may not want to kill the goose that lays the golden egg by going elsewhere. If you are not all that well off compared to others then you could just become a stepping stone for her. However, if she is in her thirties (and particularly if she already has a kid or so) she has far fewer options to look around elsewhere. Take the girl in her mid twenties I was knocking around with not so long ago, had I brought her back to UK even for a tourist visa stay at that age and attractive looking she knows she can pull many a man, she can in her home country but they are all just too poor for her around where she lives that is no doubt why she is international dating. Now unless I am assured that this girl is unquestionably 100 percent into me it would be a fools errand to bring her into UK, I would just become the stepping stone and stepped upon Her insistence that she comes to UK first or we don't meet at all just raised the red flag and gave away her true intention. A girl that was truely into me would be wanting to see me again wherever & whenever even I know that.

So I guess what I am saying is thirties is going to be safer terrain but even then some guys can get their fingers burn't with the wrong woman. going for girls in their twenties with a large age gap is possible but you're going to have to make sure you've got all the balls in your court before pressing ahead. Guys like BillyB have enough going for then and are savvy enough to know when it could work. Many of us though with a big age gap could just bump into a girl looking to take advantage and that is where the problem lies I believe.     

Your admiration for Billy's accomplishment is quite evident.. He chases after schoolgirls and you think he is savvy 
He can't even keep his fingers out of the jar even being married, but does "research" for you other "poor losers" who can't find what he has.. yeah right.. "research" he claims...

Hey, you being so scared of scammer, I know the perfect lady for you, now - she might be on the other side from what you want maybe, she is 49 but a gorgeous lady.
On the other hand she already have a couple of million dollars in the bank from her late husband and lives in a really upscale apartment in downtown Moscow, she even have a big apartment in London, and a Dacha somewhere close to Moby, so you two can finally meet. So this is good for you, you wont even have pay and to apply for a Visa to see her.. saving 200 bucks  and I am sure she will pay the bill every time you go out, she can afford it.

and next time you want to give advice - base your advice on your own experiences, not what you think, not what you suspect and not what you read, and to be honest, really don't understand anyway.

About age gaps, its 13 years between me an Tanya, not that it matters, not to her, not to me.. but its there.. and anything more would be stretching it way to far in my mind...
I could have been married to at least a couple of girls in the early/mid 20:s if I wanted to, there I put an end to things, since I don't think - 10-15-20 years down the line they will be very happy in such a marriage.  (plus they all wanted kids, and I don't)
Sure they where very serious in their search - two of them really fell "in love" with me and yes I can tell when its real and when its not. We got along extremely well and we had very nice dates together, but I am a realist, I am not 26 years old, even if I feel like it - and lets face it, we men never really grow up.
It was a nice experience on the road to finding the right one, and I have visited every pitfall there is in my search, but it's a learning curve and I came out the other side with someone to good, so perfect for me it's almost unreal.

[ML]

I could have been married to at least a couple of girls in the early/mid 20:s if I wanted to, there I put an end to things, since I don't think - 10-15-20 years down the line they will be very happy in such a marriage.  (plus they all wanted kids, and I don't)
Sure they where very serious in their search - two of them really fell "in love" with me and yes I can tell when its real and when its not. We got along extremely well and we had very nice dates together, but I am a realist, I am not 26 years old, even if I feel like it - and lets face it, we men never really grow up.

Why on earth did you waste the time of these young women and allow them to fall for you ??  Not a very nice thing to do !!

[Nightwish]

Why on earth did you waste the time of these young women and allow them to fall for you ??  Not a very nice thing to do !!

because I was as fooled as all men going on this quest, younger is better and all women wants to marry a man older then their daddy

This was women I never initiated contact with, one chased me with a determined mind on a datingsite and would not take no for an answer, so I "gave up" and went to see her.. the other two I met when I had my boots on the ground, it was fun, exciting, I felt young(er) and these were serious women or I wouldn't had spent a single minute with them, but I found that thought popping in my mind all the time, too young....and the "I want 1-2-3 children" factor came in to play..   

and besides when have I ever claimed I was a nice guy?

[Trenchcoat]

To be honest a girl in her thirties can easily just have as good if not better figure than a girl in her twenties. Some don't look like they have aged badly either so it's not necessarily all that wonderful going for a girl in her twenties particularly as it can mean she expects to be bought stuff then there is the wonder of whether she is really into you or just there because she gets bought stuff.

[BillyB]

Nightwish, are you upset I've complained about posters, which include you, that follow Trench on every one of his posts? People here know how you, Moby and JayH feel about Trench and his advice. We get it!!!! You don't have to let us know how you feel about him a million times over. Moby feels he's saving newbies from Trench so he must follow Trench around till the end of time countering every one of Trench's posts. Same with you? There are better things to do in life. Don't stress over my life . Be happy I don't stalk people. Stalking is strange behavior.

[kynrazor]

Get your ass on a plane - your in UK, its a 2-3 hour trip.. put your boots on the ground and prove it/yourself to her, not just "bla bla bla" because she has certainly heard it all before..

Be the man of action she looks for.. and this advice goes for all that is "looking", stop talking and start acting.

I read you said hoping to be there in April? Why? A weekend in Moscow takes little effort and is cheap trip from UK, only a small hassle with Visa.

Sir yes sir! But as a research student, I also have to juggle other commitments, sigh. One needs approval from the supervisor before one has the chance to even consider taking time off to visit her. Indeed, I am a slave of the financial system for the time being. The earliest window for now is April, and I guess she'll just have to wait  I figure if she is into me, it won't matter how long she has to wait so long as I never break my promises.... right?

Mating is really very simple. Just trust & rely on your basic instincts.
Confidence beats all else.

Nah I don't fit the bad boy stereotype at all. I try my best to rely on my past experience but I think I probably wasn't prepared well enough. I think the girl hinted that it's normal to receive a bouquet of flowers when boy meets girl (and I didn't give her any!)...  Do you think that is really the case? 

Miss 21 simply does not sound 'in to you' Kyn - she is flitting ...  plenty of student age relationships break down when distance / long periods apart are a factor ...

You just ain't on the ground in her city long enough ... you're virtual when not around

Indeed, without physical intimacy,  it is perhaps very difficult to seal the deal (or does this not matter much at all?). Hopefully future hug bots and virtual reality will solve this  . In the meantime.... what would you suggest I do? Skype more?

Our man did meet the woman. Her desire and intensity to communicate with him did not increase after the fact.

That would have been true Billy, until the last two weeks when she started becoming more intimate by using words eg. "my darling" not used before? Or does this mean she is simply working her way through potential suitors and have winded her numbers down? If indeed, she had so many guys flocking to her in the first place?

for a few hours and ended the visit premature....

To be fair, she was informed two days prior to my arrival so it's not like it was too sudden, and plus she saw how much time and effort (visa, tickets etc for an originally month-long trip) I spent to make my trip happen, which must've hopefully meant something to her I guess? 

Yes it might be a small hassle to get a Visa, and a Multivisa might cost a few bucks more, but getting one is REALLY easy, I went to the visa center, asked them about the multiple visa, they asked why, I said I am visiting a lady this time and doing some touristy stuff and hoping to go back many times, and they said more or less.. wonderful, welcome to Russia!

Don't worry I'm not intimidated by the costs for the visits etc and I have not moved to the stage where I am asking her to come live with me already but work commitments do limit my travel time/window a lot  The lass is working part-time jobs btw and she say she needs to save to consider travelling again so.... I guess this means I have to visit most of the time.

Time will tell if she is the real deal. I would remind you the dating pool for attractive and reasonably well off humans in Moscow is deep. She might wish to test you and you vice versa.

Let us know the results and reality.

Yeah I think it works both ways and we are just testing each other up to see how serious we are.     , I am just afraid I am wasting my time, being strung along and joining a queue of hundreds of guys waiting for a chance to be with her and she is just playing with us.  SHe does have many admirers post on her wall, though she never replies to them

The  main differences are:
1/ Cheapskates don't want to pay for visas / 'fear' the system for RU / and Belarus - so
2/ there are less guys  from the west  visiting  - meaning less of an industry around parting money from fools 
3/ ladies don't have so many potential suitors

As of 2017, Tis Very True! Part of my reasons for venturing into Russia the first time.

Once you learn to fake sincerity . . . things go a lot better.

Lol, such a player

**** Edit... Sorry  Treadmilldude, I thought I was replying to trench****
He's 39 and has no children. She's also 39 and has 1 child.

I get the impression they are so appreciative  to talk with a normal man who isn't just after one thing. The woman I talk to, said my approach was spot on, a good relationship starts  from a good friendship.

If I'm not mistaken, I think you will find that typically, sincere women above 30 will play less games whilst my experience with the ladies under 24 (partly my criteria since I am 24), seems to show that they do not necessarily know what they want and often times there is a higher chance she is playing games to entice more demand from the guys. How was I so sure? I have been rejected and outright blocked by many ladies 30 and above when I tried to have conversation with them 
Quote:" No, you are too young..." 

Sighs, more Trench relying on third party 'advice' ..

1/ Many of us do not think 'Elena' is behind her site, anymore..

I agree, I do not think Elena's website is as popular nowadays. Haven't managed to meet any "interesting" ladies and on top of that, you really have to pay to play. Otherwise not much you can do over there. And the pool of ladies over there + how long the website takes to load a profile discouraged me from going further there.

[LAman]

Sir yes sir! But as a research student, I also have to juggle other commitments, sigh. One needs approval from the supervisor before one has the chance to even consider taking time off to visit her. Indeed, I am a slave of the financial system for the time being. The earliest window for now is April, and I guess she'll just have to wait  I figure if she is into me, it won't matter how long she has to wait so long as I never break my promises.... right?



That would have been true Billy, until the last two weeks when she started becoming more intimate by using words eg. "my darling" not used before? Or does this mean she is simply working her way through potential suitors and have winded her numbers down? If indeed, she had so many guys flocking to her in the first place?

 

Why even bother writing anyone at moment? You're busy. Don't think many girls gonna hang on for 6+ months, especially younger girls with many things to do.

A girl suddenly( for no good reason) using words like 'my darling' is as fake as anything. There is a reason behind it and it has nothing to do with a sudden liking to you.

[Trenchcoat]

Kyn, not bringig a girl a bunch of flowers or even one flower is a big faux pas over there. Sure it's ok on someone you've agreed just to meet but on a fate basis with someone you've been communicating with a while and set up a we'll spend one time together situation it's a big faux pas. You did at least get her an inexpensive gift and that will have probably salvaged the situation a bit. As others have said she is looking to go with the best deal if you wait till April even skyping she may count you out if someone else with prospects is more present. After all she cannot afford to wait on the promise that you will return - you may not for all she knows, you called the first date of quick enough and for her this was probably not a good sign however true the reason. Sealing the deal with sex is no guarantee to anything. You need to work out if she is truely into you or what her game is - does she want a rich guy, a mule to get her in another country and once there find someone else? etc. No offense Kyn but you give me the impression from your background that you are a geeky kind of guy. I don't mean that as a diss but I think the more geeky a guy is often the less he is in tune with his social surounding. This is kind of evident from the flowers faux pas and expecting her to waithe on forever, that and at your age if you can't get a girl at home (and yes I know UK is not easy for that) then even still it's probably because you arnt very socially savvy. I'm not great either but have probably got slightly better over time and not completely oblivious to social mechanics. Your numerous questions indicate you don't have much of an idea about the bearing to set yourself upon socially and that you will need to work on. You may have struck it lucky and she may be into you or she may see you in another light. As I am learning there can be all sorts of games at play when fsu dating. Davo's mate for example may have struck it lucky or is the situation more that the lady has little choice - she is a single lady with a kid in her late thirties living in a poor area no doubt in a life of poverty. As already said no local guy is going to touch her, there are younger ladies without kids to be had, no local guy will want to pay out to bring up someone else's child and she in an area where foreigners rarely visit for dating is highly unlikely to get any other offers of relationship come up. So for her she really has little choice, she may indeed like the guy but love him sincerely? Out in Russia support for single mothers is not good and as she ages support for retirement is not good either. Her kid also will stand little chance out there of supporting her well in old age. So you see circumstances exist in which there is other elements at play than a simple 'hey this guy has struck it lucky first off' scenario, it happens but not truely as often as it may first appear.

[Davo]

Actually Trench, she lives in a modern  city, is a dentist and owns her own apartment. We all went to a BBQ tonight and she integrated well with my other friends wives. Couldn't stop her dancing when the music started and the champaign was flowing. She was the life of the party. There's nothing in our city that she hasn't experience before. She has stepped straight into Australian life flawlessly. She gained about 20 new Facebook friends tonight lol

During my short time on the dating  site, I didn't meet any women living in poverty. Most were financially secure and lived a life comparable to my standard of living. The woman I'm talking to has a middle level management position in her company. Eats out like me several times a week. Owns her luxury  apartment also, a few weeks ago she booked into a 4 star hotel for a night of relaxation and has a traveled abroad. Her life is no different than any woman living in a western country. All she wants is a decent man, who's good with kids, doesn't drink to excess, or sleep around  and can treat her with the love her husband  couldn't. She has at least 5 friends I've met online, all cooking for the same thing. I find it hard to understand how you seemed to have so much difficulty, when both me and my friend seem to have found quality women in our first few contacts, when genuine women seem to be thick on the ground 
 

[Trenchcoat]

Actually Trench, she lives in a modern  city, is a dentist and owns her own apartment. We all went to a BBQ tonight and she integrated well with my other friends wives. Couldn't stop her dancing when the music started and the champaign was flowing. She was the life of the party. There's nothing in our city that she hasn't experience before. She has stepped straight into Australian life flawlessly. She gained about 20 new Facebook friends tonight lol

During my short time on the dating  site, I didn't meet any women living in poverty. Most were financially secure and lived a life comparable to my standard of living. The woman I'm talking to has a middle level management position in her company. Eats out like me several times a week. Owns her luxury  apartment also, a few weeks ago she booked into a 4 star hotel for a night of relaxation and has a traveled abroad. Her life is no different than any woman living in a western country. All she wants is a decent man, who's good with kids, doesn't drink to excess, or sleep around  and can treat her with the love her husband  couldn't

At first glance it may look like FSW have a similar lifestyle and some may do, but don't be fooled a lot will not be as well of as it may first appear under the surface. A luxury apartment in a city far flung from Moscow or St. Petersburg will be a lot cheaper to obtain. Some jobs will get a woman decent enough pay many in far flung locations may not. Your friend may have been lucky and got a woman who is genuine and she may just want more of a whole family scene. Doubtless though is the point that few women nearing 40 with a kid would be chased by guyS foriegn or local. So it's an easier play for the guy but if your friend wants any kids with her he is up against the clock.