not a typical westerner

[Rick4G]

Hi guys.  I am a 49 year old guy living part time in USA and Ukraine.  Was married to a German girl for 15 years who was just to westernized from the start.
she had been in US already 6 years when we met.  lessons learned...

I offer a different perspective of Ukraine having lived as a child until 10 during USSR and then most of my 20s also so Ive watched the country change up to present time.

I operate a charity in Ukraine and help young adults pursue business opportunities in various fields.

I will eventually marry again someone from Ukraine and had several opportunities but I want to be sure I marry the right one.

I have found that when you spend alot of time here its easy to meet girls and have no need for an agency.

My current girlfriend just turned 21 last week and we have been together nearly a year.  She is helpful in my work and does all the things one would expect of an FSU girl.  As you might expect, she is opinionated and easily speaks her mind although she knows I am going to make the decisions. 

Is it an extreme age gap?  oh yes, and I wouldnt recommend it as it can be fraught with peril especially if your wife seeking activity is limited to a couple weeks a year.  Finding a good girl at an extreme age difference is really difficult and it takes alot of time to figure them out and know if they are sincere because more often than not, they are not serious and merely looking for a jump start from someone with significantly more resources than her.

Im good with whatever comments you want to throw my way and willing to help anyone in their quest as Ive seen it all.  I have friends who are letter writers for agencies and know pro daters.  I have a VIP transportation business and have probably met at least a couple hundred guys coming here looking for love usually without success.  I recently watched a guy have 4 dates in 24 hours and fail all 4 times because he didnt prepare, didnt know what to expect and didnt have a clue about the country he chose to find love.

Ive watched the same guy(actually have come to know him well yet he doesnt listen) coming here for 5+ years doing the same things over and over but still cant figure out why he still hasnt had success.

[BillyB]

Finding a good girl at an extreme age difference is really difficult and it takes alot of time to figure them out and know if they are sincere because more often than not, they are not serious and merely looking for a jump start from someone with significantly more resources than her.

Many men who have problems identifying the good girls have problems regardless of the age of the woman. Like the guy you know, they may never "get it" and get on the right track. Some of these men may be extremely successful in life with work and money but when it comes to women, they may not be as sharp. Part of the problem is many of the men who choose to look overseas for a wife are divorced and although they lived with a woman for 20 years, their communication skills with the ladies are lacking and with the immense desire to feel loved, they get involved with the first woman that gives them any sort of attention. Unfortunately the gold diggers and pro daters pursue men much more aggressively than the good girls. Welcome to the forum Rick. Many of us would like to hear about your adventures in the FSU and with the ladies.

[alex330]

Welcome to the forum and great work working with the kids. My wife and I have started working on something similar in her hometown of Odessa. Maybe good to network and share experiences, pitfalls, or cross promote to help the kids further.

[PBRstreetg]

 
Excellent post spacibo
most people here are like you knowledgeable and contributory I hope you continue. There is some advice here and there. And room for side stories always welcome

[Rick4G]

"Welcome to the forum and great work working with the kids. My wife and I have started working on something similar in her hometown of Odessa. Maybe good to network and share experiences, pitfalls, or cross promote to help the kids further."

Hi Alex,
I work in Kherson, Nikolaev and Kirovohrad regions as well as Odesa.  1 children's home and 2 shelters as well as women's home in Odesa.
I focus on prevention of sex trafficking of orphan graduates and rescues of those we find on the street.  we have just started 4th house for girls.
My GF survived a traumatic life and  can connect and relate to these girls in a way that is just fascinating to observe.

would be great to meet up one day

[alex330]

Yes, would be great to meet at some point and try to further help in some capacity. We are currently working with the Chernomorsky Penal Colony orphanage in the Odessa Oblast. Although the kids there are not so bad off to be honest. I would like to refocus our efforts more on adolescents and provide skills allowing for them to succeed and secure jobs. Seems to be a greater need for that in Ukraine.


Let me know if there is anything you feel we may be able to help with on our end. Thanks

[Rick4G]

Alex, hit me up on private message.  I would be interested in knowing about your work there!
that is a venue Ive never thought of.  I will go back to Odesa in a few weeks to make sure my girls there are ready for university.

[TagUrIt898]

Hey Rick, sorry for the late welcome.  There are plenty of different relationships, no one can judge in my opinion.  As long as you are honest about what you have and what you want, live your lives and be happy.

Now, the only thing I would ask is, does she want children?  Is that an option for this relationship?  Most FSUW all want families at some point.

Kudos to you for the work you're both doing. It's very generous and selfless of you guys to give back in such a way.  I wish you two and the work you're doing the very best!!

Tag

[Rick4G]

Hey Rick, sorry for the late welcome.  There are plenty of different relationships, no one can judge in my opinion.  As long as you are honest about what you have and what you want, live your lives and be happy.

Now, the only thing I would ask is, does she want children?  Is that an option for this relationship?  Most FSUW all want families at some point.

Kudos to you for the work you're both doing. It's very generous and selfless of you guys to give back in such a way.  I wish you two and the work you're doing the very best!!

Tag

yes, she absolutely wants kids and we have talked about the issue of age and that I dont want to die before the child's 18th birthday.
Im good with having another child as I have 5 already and really enjoy fatherhood