Russian Women Discussion

RWD Discussion Groups => Experienced => Topic started by: viking on April 20, 2006, 05:40:00 PM

Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on April 20, 2006, 05:40:00 PM
Hopefully I have picked the best slot to ask this question.

Most AWs 'appreciate' or 'expect' the typical diamond engagement ring. Does this also apply to RWs? Or is there some other type of preference over there?

And..how many of you made it clear you were coming over with a ring versus "surprise"?
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Oosik on April 20, 2006, 06:44:08 PM
They don't expect it from their men.

Don't buy it here, buy it there and don't fall for the DeBeers crap, spend a couple hundred in a store with her.

Don't tell her it is coming, just take her to a jewelry store and buy her something that is nice there. If the price range there is $50-$500, get her something in the upper range of that. In my fiance's town, the store had mostly $50-$300, I got her one that costs $150 and she was tickled pink.

Slapping a huge rock on her will perpetuate the myth that you are rich, and she will expect you to treat her that way here.

I think of witchdoctor from another board, married a 20 year old when he was 40, put a $25,000 ring on her finger. That kind of extravigance was meant to impress his friends, not show her he loves her.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on April 20, 2006, 07:56:54 PM
Quote from: viking
Hopefully I have picked the best slot to ask this question.

Most AWs 'appreciate' or 'expect' the typical diamond engagement ring. Does this also apply to RWs? Or is there some other type of preference over there?

And..how many of you made it clear you were coming over with a ring versus "surprise"?

A gold ring on her right hand, opposite the married finger (left in US) will do the trick for her. Why do more than you have to. Spend what you would have spent on a diamond on the honeymoon instead. That's my idea anyway.

I did understand that the Eastern Europeans do not follow an engagement process as we Western do. So what I did was  to buy the gold band. I gave it to her along with a gold chain. I told her to wear it as a necklace to remember me by. She did and was delighted to do so. Symolism goes a long way.

Peewee
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: dfb on April 20, 2006, 08:14:13 PM
About 7 years ago, I went to Minsk with the intentions on shopping for our rings.  I let her know ahead of time, and she could hardly wait for that day.  We purchased our wedding bands and her diamond ring in Minsk at a government store.  It was a fun experience.  The prices at the private stores were overpriced.  

The gold mixture has a different chemical composition in the FSU than the US; the gold has a rose color instead of yellow.  In the US, purchasing jewelry has been awkward trying to color match the wedding rings.  Since then, I have been seeing stores starting to stock the rose gold as a standard item.  Otherwise, I have been having jewelry custom made in the rose gold.  The jewelry doesn't cost any more than yellow gold, and is actually more fun and interesting that just buying off of the shelf.

Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Oosik on April 20, 2006, 08:27:53 PM
My fiance's ring is a gold band with diamond chips in it in a spread  zig zag pattern, maybe 10 chips (or they could be small cut diamonds, I  didn't pull out the loupe or stare at it too long). It is better than  the basic band, but not extravigant. Cost $150 there, and she really  liked it.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on April 21, 2006, 07:57:15 AM
Thanks everyone. $25,000 is way out of my league but I was going to pop for a few thou. $150 sounds a whole lot better.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on April 21, 2006, 08:08:29 AM
I've got a news flash for some of you cheap skates.   If you give a poor gift for an engagement ring your girl will realize this when she gets here and sees the reality of American custom.  She will likely be the only gal walking around without a diamond of some size on her finger.

You will begin to diminish in stature and her respect for you will go down as soon as she comes to understand you treated her with less regard than you would have an AW.  No woman likes to think she was bought too cheap.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: MandM on April 21, 2006, 08:35:01 AM
Agree with jb. May be while she is in Russia, she'll be happy with a $50 ring, but when she comes to US she'll soon find out what's what and you'll be in trouble. If you can afford it, buy a more expensive ring. The ring symbolises your love for God's sake!
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on April 21, 2006, 08:39:45 AM
jb

You make sense. And I agree. My plan was to buy something nice here and bring it with me. Having done this before I know the drill. But when I hear that the custom of spending big bucks is lost in the translation it gives me pause for thought. Hence the post. I know what I want to do, have the fantasy of the candle lit dinner, bended knee, sparkling stone in candle light, and so forth. To go to a store, pick up an inexpensive ring and put it on her finger there does not really turn my crank, unless it is the prelude to something better. Maybe both scenarios? A nice thrill in the morning and a better one in the evening?
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on April 21, 2006, 08:45:24 AM
There are ways to economize without appearing cheap.  For example, this 3+ ct stone can be had for less than a grand.  A jeweler could make it into a very nice ring.  It is a real, "dug from the earth",  gemstone, not a rhinestone or a cheap imitation man-made diamond.

(http://www.simplysapphires.com/imageswhite2005/whiterns3191.jpg)
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on April 21, 2006, 08:56:14 AM
jp

I know diamonds. A 3 ct anything is going to attract a lot of attention. Ivana Trump might wear one, but she is in a different league. I think a really nice quality stone, on the order of an 'average' size, (very common these days is .5 to .7ct)) would be more than adequate. Even in this range you are looking at $3K or so.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on April 21, 2006, 09:10:07 AM
If you know about diamonds you should know there are 3 other precious stones, rubies, emeralds, and sapphires, all others are classed as semi-precious.  The stone pictured is a white sapphire, and is indistinguable from a white diamond in all regards except a hardness test. (It is a 9.0 on the Mohs scale where the diamond is a 10)

It makes a beautiful ring, and BTW, a sapphire [size="-1"]symbolizes faithfulness, so it really makes a perfect engagement ring.
[/size]
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: dfb on April 21, 2006, 09:25:05 AM
A few months after my wife arrived, she did feel bad about the diamond ring (not the wedding bands).  At the time we were shopping, she did not want us to spend much money on the diamond ring when there was going to be so many other expenses with her immigration.  After she arrived, she regretted that decision, so we selected a ring with a ruby & 2 diamonds for our first anniversary (color matched the gold).  She wears the ruby and wedding band on her left hand and the original on the right hand.  Most importantly, she participated in all of the purchases; it was very importance that she take part in selecting the rings since she was going to wear them 24/7.  Some women want the surprise, some want to select the ring.  Good luck on guessing what she wants.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on April 21, 2006, 09:34:19 AM
If you are hung up on having to have a diamond, I just looked and here is a 1.04 ct loose stone that can be bought for a few hundred, not a few thousand.  Of course, it's an Austrailian stone, not south African, so DeBeers isn't involved in the pricing.




(http://i24.ebayimg.com/03/i/06/e6/9e/73_1.JPG)


Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on April 21, 2006, 09:35:08 AM
Never really considered a white sapphire. It was always a diamond. I'll look into this tonight. Thanks.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: LatinSwede on April 21, 2006, 10:12:33 AM
We're both just getting the wedding bands.  I don't care how some other stom Amerikaanse Klootzak spends his money on his dachteloos Amerikaanse teef.  Me and mijn Okrainse liefje are going to jump in my sweet black VW Beetle.  Then we're headed to our romantic scenis get away to a lovely part of Virginia.  It's just the 2 of us going off to say our "I do's".  I've been to my relatives wedding over here in states, and find them over priced and tacky spectacles.  My loving midwest relatives doing the conga line, the twist, and the chicken dance, is sight I don't want my sweetheart to endure.  For the price of an engagement ring, I can take her to my own special paradise, Panama and even aquire some modest property.  Also, we'd still have enough for a trip back to Odessa, and even a side trip to Sohphiesky park.

IMO, it's better to let people think I don't have much.  That way, I don't have to worry about so many people with their hand out.  Let them get a little hunk of rock, while I'm discretely purchasing a nice estate in Central America.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Daknack on April 21, 2006, 02:51:06 PM
Heres my advice.  If you spend alot of money on a ring you should be hit in the head with a big stone (instead of putting one on someones finger).  I bought a HUGELY expensive ring for my first wife.  It was a very big mistake, and not just because when we divorced expensive ring went bye-bye.  You are building a life with a woman, and a ring while it might look nice is not going to help you build that life.  My expendature for a ring would have been better spent saving for our retirement, or putting a bigger downpayment on a house.  Please do not be a dumbass like I was.  Learn from my stupidity.  That few thousand you were going to spend on a ring can go to something more practical like a car for her to get around in, or in fixing up the house.  When you get married the goal is a life TOGETHER and your focus should be on that.  In a marriage you should think of the good of the marriage first, your spouse second, your kids third (if applicable), and yourself dead ass last.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Jet on April 21, 2006, 05:57:02 PM
Quote from: viking
jb

You make sense. And I agree. My plan was to buy something nice here and bring it with me. Having done this before I know the drill. But when I hear that the custom of spending big bucks is lost in the translation it gives me pause for thought. Hence the post. I know what I want to do, have the fantasy of the candle lit dinner, bended knee, sparkling stone in candle light, and so forth. To go to a store, pick up an inexpensive ring and put it on her finger there does not really turn my crank, unless it is the prelude to something better. Maybe both scenarios? A nice thrill in the morning and a better one in the evening?

In my case, I bought the ring here - a nice marquis cut 1/2c/vs-1/E, but not ridiculously expensive. When she accepted it she was thrilled, but even moreso when I took the time to explain the tradition in western culture, and exactly what it meant for me to give & her to wear it. After she recieved the visa, Lil's parents accompanied us on a trip to N. Novgorod to select the wedding rings. It was an all day affair, going from shop to shop, having lunch at one of the better sidewalk cafe`s and finally deciding on her exact favorite (her band is slightly wider than mine at 9mm/7.5mm). The grand total for both was around $82.00. Being a romantic, I really liked the idea that the rings came from Russia. Lil understands the price of them was rather cheap, having been here for a few years now, but at the time she was stunned that I'd drop that much cash so easily.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Oosik on April 21, 2006, 08:31:22 PM
If you buy it together in her country, and if it is a nice one based on the selections available in the store, then she will be happy. Unless she is shallow.

Lyuda is a practical woman, I have no doubt that she would rather have that extra $1,000 go towards a car. Lyuda is even afraid to wear this ring on the bus, for fear of being robbed of it. I do like the idea of buying a loose stone from AUZ, though. A while back walmart had birthstone rings, where the stones were heart shaped. I think it would be cool to get her stone and mine in birthstones, and have one on either side of a modest rock. Maybe that would be a good wedding ring. But either way, I'd get the first ring there, with her.

"The bigger the rock, the smaller the ****"
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Turboguy on April 21, 2006, 08:58:56 PM
Viking, by a tiny little diamond and tell her you have heard of robberies where they cut the finger off to get the ring and you love her too much to put her at risk.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on April 21, 2006, 10:43:26 PM
Quote from: Turboguy
Viking, by a tiny little diamond and tell her you have heard of robberies where they cut the finger off to get the ring and you love her too much to put her at risk.

LOL!

 

Peewee
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on April 22, 2006, 08:37:53 AM
Jet,

Yep, that was about the same deal I was thinking of, only a round solitaire. Pretty much the same qualties as well. Nice size, nice color and sparkles like the dickens.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: LatinSwede on April 22, 2006, 09:10:42 AM
Quote from: Turboguy
Viking, by a tiny little diamond and tell her you have heard of robberies where they cut the finger off to get the ring and you love her too much to put her at risk.

 

Down in Latin America, that is a very valid concern.  Even in Panama, I would not let my sweetheart wear jewlery.  Cutting off of fingers is something that happens in Columbia, Venuzuela, and Brasil.  BTW, Gold jewelry is way cheaper in Panama.  The little jewelry stores, kind of parralel what I see in Ukraine.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Captmonk1 on April 22, 2006, 09:31:54 AM
Take a decent ring with you. If you love her when she gets back to the U.S. , surprise her with a real ring. (diamond engagement)
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: LatinSwede on April 22, 2006, 11:39:42 AM
I'm just waiting until I get on the other end, to get our bands.  I'm worried about Ukrainski Militsya making me pay a redicuolous "tax" or "confiscate" them.  I use the terms sarcastically.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on April 22, 2006, 11:44:47 AM
Ladies,

Your opinion?
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Jet on April 22, 2006, 11:55:27 AM
Quote from: LatinSwede
I'm worried about Ukrainski Militsya making me pay a redicuolous "tax" or "confiscate" them. 

LatinSwede, remember the fact that they DON'T run you through a metal detector when you get OFF the plane, only before you board, and the TSA really couldn't care less if you have a ring in your pocket when you fly abroad. I haven't heard a single story yet where the AM was strip-searched beforre being allowed to enter Ukraine or Russia :shock:.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Daknack on April 22, 2006, 12:09:10 PM
You could always "Prision Smuggle" it in :shock::shock::shock:
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: BC on April 22, 2006, 12:24:32 PM
If you wear a necklace just add a 'trinket'... with buttoned shirt of course.


Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Jet on April 22, 2006, 05:16:34 PM
Quote from: Daknack
You could always "Prision Smuggle" it in :shock::shock::shock:

Once you see some of the passport control agents over there, you'll be looking forward to a cavity search :toocool:
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: Oosik on April 23, 2006, 03:52:08 PM
JB,

Do you have a favorite online site for loose stones? I'd imagine one could get badly screwed by choosing one foolishly.
Title: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on April 23, 2006, 04:05:59 PM
Actually I have several.

SimplySapphires is one.  I have bought several stones from this man and had a lot of phone conversations with him, I know him to be honest.  http://www.simplysapphires.com/ (http://www.simplysapphires.com/)
Another company that I've had good luck with is Thai Gems.  They offer a few more, a greater selection, and are truthful in what they advertise.  A good place to pick up an odd bargain here and there.
http://www.thaigem.com/ (http://www.thaigem.com/)
For diamonds I tend to deal directly with the Argyle people in Austrailia, these are not the pure white diamonds of South Africa, but the slightly colored stones which I think are much prettier and a whole lot cheaper,
http://www.dkr.com.au/general/Kimberley-Fine-Diamonds/argyle-diamonds-perth.html (http://www.dkr.com.au/general/Kimberley-Fine-Diamonds/argyle-diamonds-perth.html)

I hope that helps you some.


P.S.  My wife now has a lot of custom made jewerly because I have been able to get loose stones relatively cheap and have them mounted in both yellow or white gold.  Up until now the mountings have been pretty inexpensive, but with gold prices being upwards of $700 per oz, I think those days are behind us.

Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: LatinSwede on May 07, 2006, 05:50:08 PM
How about getting a dollar in quarters, and go to the vending machines in the Wal-Mart foyer.  When we say "I do", she'll have a pretty pink Barbie ring, while I proudly sport the red Spiderman ring.  Isnt' that upscale?  :D
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: solomon on May 16, 2006, 06:56:44 PM
jp

I know diamonds. A 3 ct anything is going to attract a lot of attention. Ivana Trump might wear one, but she is in a different league. I think a really nice quality stone, on the order of an 'average' size, (very common these days is .5 to .7ct)) would be more than adequate. Even in this range you are looking at $3K or so.


Target for $200. My first run I spent almost 4 grand and it blew up. She still has the ring. Most any ring for them is a prize.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: TomT on May 18, 2006, 04:44:06 AM
The engaged guys should not assume that all Russian women accept the absurd Western notion that extravagant spending is a sign of love. Some Russian women consider such spending to be a sign of stupidity and financial irresponsibility. It will be a good idea to check your fiancee's opinion on this issue before rushing out and buying a diamond. (Assuming, of course, that you care about her opinion.)
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: swindoom on May 18, 2006, 06:23:39 AM
Some Russian women consider such spending to be a sign of stupidity and financial irresponsibility.

When I spoke with my wife about engagement rings before we married she said very similar words, why spend so much money on something that is in reality meaningless. She also cannot understand why women continue to wear their engagment rings after they are married, I could not think of a good reason.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on May 18, 2006, 07:18:16 AM
I guess a cheap dime store ring will do, or even a cigar band for that matter,,, but it hardly speaks of the love you are suppose to be expressing when you give a betrothal ring.  If, in 5 years time, it gets relegated to the unused jewelry box in favor of the wedding band, so be it, it served it's purpose.

My wife still wears her diamond engagement ring on her right hand, sort of a balance thingy, if you know what I mean.  I think most women will continue to treasure a good piece of jewelry if given in the proper spirit by someone she loves.  Just my HO.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on May 18, 2006, 07:23:07 AM
The engaged guys should not assume that all Russian women accept the absurd Western notion that extravagant spending is a sign of love. Some Russian women consider such spending to be a sign of stupidity and financial irresponsibility. It will be a good idea to check your fiancee's opinion on this issue before rushing out and buying a diamond. (Assuming, of course, that you care about her opinion.)

This is what I was thinking. If her mindset has her happiness level targeted at a simple gold wedding band then that is want it will be. No sence in introducing to her a potential bad habit of wanting expensive jewelry. That was your idea, remember, and it is a costly notion. Find out what she is happy with and then move on. I'd rather spend the unneeded jewelry money on getting her a better car, if she loves shoes then more shoes, or a nice vactation to a nearby KOA campground. Something like that.

Peewee
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on May 18, 2006, 07:24:33 AM
Peewee,

It's no wonder to me that you are still single.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: KenC on May 18, 2006, 07:35:58 AM
The engaged guys should not assume that all Russian women accept the absurd Western notion that extravagant spending is a sign of love. Some Russian women consider such spending to be a sign of stupidity and financial irresponsibility. It will be a good idea to check your fiancee's opinion on this issue before rushing out and buying a diamond. (Assuming, of course, that you care about her opinion.)
Ah, but this too can change with time! Upon marrying Lena, I bought her a beautiful wedding band with inlaid square diamonds. Beautiful and yet much more practical than one big rock jutting out. A few year later, I bought a duplicate piece only this time in white gold as she explained that yellow gold is out of fashion. Now as we approach our 7th anniversary, there is more and more talk about that big rock!  ::)
KenC
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: mischief on May 18, 2006, 07:42:29 AM
I think most women will continue to treasure a good piece of jewelry if given in the proper spirit by someone she loves.  Just my HO.

Couldn't agree more...
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: BC on May 18, 2006, 07:49:28 AM
Before the church wedding we're going to send our 'ZAGS standart' for recycling into newer custom made models.  A goldsmith in her home town does great work.  Will still go on the right hands though.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: catzenmouse on May 18, 2006, 08:19:14 AM
Peewee,

It's no wonder to me that you are still single.

Naw jb, he's just holding out for that next Miss Universe like the ex.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: RacerX on May 18, 2006, 09:03:19 AM
Must be the company I travel in, but all of the RW I have known had or expected a diamond ring - this is definitely one of those YMMV kinda of situations.

There are a number of great semi-wholesale diamond merchants online where you will at least get your money’s worth if not a bargain. I personally like WhiteFlash.com but others such as Blue Nile, etc are well respected.  Nice thing is you can browse thousand of loose stones on-line since everyone uses the same lists [check out Pricescope.com]

As regard to how much to spend, there seems to be two rules: 2X  your monthly pay or the better one: consider what social circles you/she will be in and target the size of stone to match what the other wives have.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: Bruce on May 18, 2006, 09:44:16 AM
It seems like we go through this topic every year or so.  So, I'll give my experience one more time.  I messed up big time twice, until I got it right the third time.  Luckily for me, someone had advised me on RWG to not give your fiance an expensive ring until she makes it Stateside - and I actually listened.  So, I ended up buying three rings in Russia with the total dollar amount not more than $300.  When my wife made it here I changed her ring from the $75 or so ring I bought for her in Tver to an appropriate engagement ring.  For the guy who is really sure you can give her the more expensive ring in the FSU, but if you have any doubt, give her a less expensive ring and change it when you get here when the timing is right for the two of you. 

In my opinion, you have the beautiful large stone engagement ring on her index finger first, followed by the diamond wedding band.  Everything should be set in platinum.  That makes for the best look, though some would just call it an ostentacious diamond show.  Diamond stud ear rings in platinum along with the white gold / diamond watch plus diamond platinum or white gold necklace / pendant will complete your thoughtful show of love as well as deplete your bank account.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: BC on May 18, 2006, 10:10:45 AM
Yeah.. yearly recap time I guess..

It was my MIL that insisted on a ring before she would 'allow' me to ask the families permission to marry their daughter.

We scurried around town and bought the best we could find.. IIRC around 200 bucks (whew).

"Ma" had seen this western tradition on TV and figured this western man had better get off his butt and do things right!

 ;D
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: Charles on May 18, 2006, 11:06:35 AM
While I agree with the sentiments expressed above that a diamond ring is not required, it is most appreciated by the RW.   I would avoid the 3ct and keep it in the 1.0 range.   My wife likes hers - a little over 1.5 ct.   At first she thought it was outlandish, now after 5 years she likes to compare brilliance, cut, etc. with other ladies' rings.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on May 18, 2006, 03:05:49 PM
Naw jb, he's just holding out for that next Miss Universe like the ex.

She is a great mother to our son but as a wife she was too tempremental for me. She had always the attitude that she should be the queen of some country. But I did make it 10 years. I'm heading into a different direction. That was the been there done that in my life.

Peewee
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on May 18, 2006, 03:08:54 PM
Must be the company I travel in, but all of the RW I have known had or expected a diamond ring - this is definitely one of those YMMV kinda of situations.

There are a number of great semi-wholesale diamond merchants online where you will at least get your money’s worth if not a bargain. I personally like WhiteFlash.com but others such as Blue Nile, etc are well respected.  Nice thing is you can browse thousand of loose stones on-line since everyone uses the same lists [check out Pricescope.com]

As regard to how much to spend, there seems to be two rules: 2X  your monthly pay or the better one: consider what social circles you/she will be in and target the size of stone to match what the other wives have.
[/quot

Which two months? My income fluxuates wildly from month to month so did I pick the slow to months or the busy two months? Who came up with that 2X anyway? Maybe you just look at her and figure out what it's going to take to make her happy and then double that amount.

Peewee
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: RacerX on May 18, 2006, 04:07:54 PM


Which two months? My income fluxuates wildly from month to month so did I pick the slow to months or the busy two months? Who came up with that 2X anyway? Maybe you just look at her and figure out what it's going to take to make her happy and then double that amount.

Peewee

that's a double entendre if I've ever heard one   ;D

That 2x thing is something the jewelers came up with, or was is the guy who invented Mother's Day??
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: catzenmouse on May 18, 2006, 04:31:20 PM
She is a great mother to our son but as a wife she was too tempremental for me. She had always the attitude that she should be the queen of some country. But I did make it 10 years. I'm heading into a different direction. That was the been there done that in my life.

Peewee

Well I truly do hope the direction that you are heading ends up in a good place. There is not much that is easy in this RW/WM relationship. But if you do find the right one it is very well worth it!

Ken
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: viking on May 18, 2006, 05:50:40 PM
Who thought of 2X? Think DeBeers, DeBeers, DeBeers.

Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on May 18, 2006, 06:05:44 PM
Who thought of 2X? Think DeBeers, DeBeers, DeBeers.



Could also have been the people that decided that you should change your oil every 3,000 miles. I have always suspected that whomever it was that made up these rules of thumbs was contrived to line somebodys pockets in quick fashion.
When it comes to wedding rings buy what your heart tells you to buy.

Peewee
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on May 18, 2006, 06:09:30 PM
Well I truly do hope the direction that you are heading ends up in a good place. There is not much that is easy in this RW/WM relationship. But if you do find the right one it is very well worth it!

Ken

True, Ken. The same could be said about any marriage between any two people. My parents will celebrate their 65th wedding anniversary this coming October. I'd bet that if you asked either of my parents if it was easy they would say the same, that it was not so easy to do.

Peewee
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: DKMM on May 25, 2006, 11:56:39 PM
Any of you guys tried the fake route?  Ever consider it without telling her its fake (and not specifically saying its real either)?

Interestingly named site:

http://www.russianbrilliants.net/

Hmmm 8)
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: Voyageur on May 26, 2006, 04:29:12 AM
DKMN,

If you are really serious about a FSU woman, I would not recommend the "fake" route, unless you tell her it is this way (which is sort of self-defeating the purpose).  This is not a purchase that should be taken lightly, and it is likely that she will - eventually - notice the difference anyway.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: BC on May 26, 2006, 04:47:25 AM
DKMN,

You don't need to make a decision really quick or?

Just remember 'first things first'  ;)
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: jb on May 27, 2006, 07:18:03 AM
Quote
Any of you guys tried the fake route?  Ever consider it without telling her its fake (and not specifically saying its real either)?

Hummm,,, it makes me wonder about the seriousness of anyone who would begin a relationship with a lie.  And giving a ring with a fake stone, and leading the woman to believe it was the real McCoy, would be just that.  Sooner or later the woman will discover the truth and your little secret will become an issue that you will have trouble explaining away.

I'm also wondering why a man might consider such a tack.  Is it because he is just downright cheap?  I hope not, because to a RW entering into what she hopes will be a life long marriage, I assure you she is not hoping for a "greedy" man.  That's pretty much the kiss of death in dealing with a Russian Woman.   Or, is it because a man might have doubts about the depth of his or her emotional attachment, i.e., gotta do the K-1 to figure out if you actually are in love enough to go ahead and marry, thus he doesn't want to invest anymore money than he has to?  This philosophic outlook will probably be the prelude to another story such as we've just read.

If you don't care enough about the woman/girl to give her something she would consider special to cement the engagement bond, better not to give her anything at all. 

Engagement rings are not part of the Russian culture, a RW getting hitched to a RM will probably not expect such a token, however to those RWs who are in the business of seeking out a foreigner, especially an AM, well,,, I think you'd have to travel pretty far afield to find a woman who isn't aware of this western custom.  They study our culture with far more zeal than most of you guys devote to learning about theirs.

YMMV.
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: PeeWee on May 27, 2006, 07:40:31 AM
DKMN,

If you are really serious about a FSU woman, I would not recommend the "fake" route, unless you tell her it is this way (which is sort of self-defeating the purpose).  This is not a purchase that should be taken lightly, and it is likely that she will - eventually - notice the difference anyway.

yep, I gave a pair of diamond earrings to my last ladyfriend. She was happy to get them, and they were expensive but I forget the karats, but the second thing out of her mouth, after "spaciba" was, "Are these zercon?"  Are you going to lie and tell "no'? later she visits a jeweler only to learn that they are zercon.

I bought an expensive cross for her when I last visited Moscow. About $1,700.00 expensive. There was a tag attached to the back of the cross. The jeweler warned me not to remove the tag so that my friend could see exactly what it was that she had received. I did not remove the tag, as instucted by the jeweler, and gave the cross to my friend. She was over joyed and show the cross to everyone with eyesight of her. And then she flipped it over and read the tag.

You cannot go cheap with the jewelry. This is one area where women accel far beyond your understanding of the subject.

Peewee
Title: Re: Engagement Rings
Post by: witchdoctor on June 22, 2019, 02:19:35 PM
 Yes I did!  A year after we married! And I got it back!