Men's Appearance

[Shostakovich]

A couple of new threads now discuss the subject of appearances so I thought to round it out and ask the ladies here to state their preferences in men's appearance.  It would be nice to get the do's and don'ts and where appearance stands as a mate selection criterion. 

[Ludmila]

A good topic, Shost !

For personal relationship, a must :

tall ( above 6'' )

sports type ( genuinely into sports)

sports figure ( no  "beer belly", please)

face : high cheekbones, thin face ( Clint Eeastwood type, with/w-o mustach)

clean shaven

knows how and what to wear

everything he is wearing inevitably shows the sexy body ( without intentional effort)



To be my &  my husband's friend,   all the above does not apply.

A must :

intellectual type

kind

good mixer

dressed as he pleases, except "nakido"  or  rags

highly motivated to communicate.

[ML]

To be my &  my husband's friend,   all the above does not apply.

A must :

intellectual type

kind

good mixer

dressed as he pleases, except "nakido"  or  rags

highly motivated to communicate.

OK, I can qualify to be your friend.  But there shall be no sex with you, nor with your husband, since I have slight beer belly.

[SMS60]

A good topic, Shost !

For personal relationship, a must :

tall ( above 6'' )

sports type ( genuinely into sports)

sports figure ( no  "beer belly", please)

face : high cheekbones, thin face ( Clint Eeastwood type, with/w-o mustach)

clean shaven

knows how and what to wear

everything he is wearing inevitably shows the sexy body ( without intentional effort)



To be my &  my husband's friend,   all the above does not apply.

A must :

intellectual type

kind

good mixer

dressed as he pleases, except "nakido"  or  rags

highly motivated to communicate.

Translation from women talk to men talk.......................... Women always want what they cant have

[Jumper]

SMS-
  My educated guess is Ludmila's husband is quite handsome ,and meets all the criteria.


but i do agree with your post .
most "people" (not just women)  naturally want it all  ,
 and compromise to their taste, and their own reality, accordingly?

Hetero men who deny they would want a true top supermodel *if*
 she was smart, wealthy, witty, completely down to earth ,great personality ,and genuinely loved him ,are few and far between ,or in some weird  denial.
 

[innakrug]

I read at many topics that AM men think RW do not care how her fiance or husband look like (little bit better then monkey )  You might want to think so, but that is not true. It is important for RW look nice herself, but she is expecting same from her partner. As for myself I can say that for me
DO'S nice haircut, cleanshaved face, nice clean clothes (please, not from 50s) nice cologne :kissing: , little belly is okay (I actually like it, but LIITLE), I have to add good manners (I know it is not appearance, but very important). If man do not have stated above Do's he has to be willing to let me help him with that

Don'ts opposite from written above.

P.S. One more thing (but very important) Please do not ware sleeveless tops except to gym or you shaving underarms.

[BillyB]

If a woman can find a good man, she won't care what color your Rolls Royce is. 

[innakrug]

If a woman can find a good man, she won't care what color your Rolls Royce is.  

I don't think she would love you, but your Rolls Royce :usdeyes:

[Doll]

I don't think she would love you, but your Rolls Royce :usdeyes:

Why?

[Doll]

For me the "face type" doesn't matter. Not fat, neat,dressy pants+shirt+tie.Watches, cologne  Nice car.
No boots (like Timberland ), no flip flops. Shorts are ok on the weekends.
I guess my husband close to all above 

[Shostakovich]

For me the "face type" doesn't matter. Not fat, neat,dressy pants+shirt+tie.Watches, cologne  Nice car.
No boots (like Timberland ), no flip flops. Shorts are ok on the weekends.
I guess my husband close to all above 

Thanks to all ladies for responses thus far.  Nice car!  First time I think of that as a fashion accessory - I suppose the woman's perspective really is quite different from a man's.

[Shostakovich]

And P.S. to the above: You know ladies, some men think of a woman as an accessory to their car.

[Markus]

If a woman can find a good man, she won't care what color your Rolls Royce is. 

Billy B.
I think you're correct on this one. Of course, this coming from a Ford F150 guy.

My wife has been adjusting my clothes from the day I met her. She even makes me shirts (she sews).
I have sleep clothes, home clothes, and out of home clothes and you don't relax in anything but home clothes.
If I don't look tip top in public, she feels it's a reflection on her.

[Doll]

Thanks to all ladies for responses thus far.  Nice car!  First time I think of that as a fashion accessory - I suppose the woman's perspective really is quite different from a man's.

Not fashion but  the car "completes" the appearance  
Dressy pants-shirt-tie in the truck? Nooooooo      

[Doll]

And P.S. to the above: You know ladies, some men think of a woman as an accessory to their car.

I don't think so unless they are brainless idiots but we're not talking of idiots, are we? 

[innakrug]

Why?

Usually, men who can afford to have Rolls Royce, can afford to have "wife" 40 years younger. I do not think it is love there. But it is my opinion.

[Ludmila]

SMS60,

your supposition that "women always want what they cannot have" may be true, but my boy was INDEED way  beyond my expectations and surpasses what I wished for in my wildest dreams.

My description down in the thread is just him. Are you happy for me?

Manlooking, I agree to the  deal ! Bring your girl along,  and a couple of bottles of beer over :-) :-)

[Lily]

A couple of new threads now discuss the subject of appearances so I thought to round it out and ask the ladies here to state their preferences in men's appearance.  It would be nice to get the do's and don'ts and where appearance stands as a mate selection criterion. 

Sure, appearance is the thing that belongs to it. An inherent part of personality. A shell that is to be associated with beloved man.

My guess would be that a good answer is in another thread, given also by you Shosty and Sartre, "Every depth requires a surface". Appearance should vouch for good genes, great health, physical strenght, and intelligence.

However, what particular appearance should a man have in order to be attractive for a particular woman, is another thing, and a complicated one.

[ML]

 little belly is okay (I actually like it, but LIITLE),

I have had non-romantic interactions with many business women in FSU of all ages, but mostly 30 to 60s.

We often discuss exercising, yoga, weight lifting, etc.

When I say to them:  "I still can't quite get rid of this belly (which is not large)."

Without exception, they all pat my stomach and say:  "No, no,   I like, don't
make it go away."

They often point to a skinny guy and say:  "We don't like that look"

[groovlstk]

Translation from women talk to men talk.......................... Women always want what they cant have

Maybe true, but I'd say the OP's "wish list" for what she seeks in a man is much more realistic than what most single men who travel to Russia or Ukraine expect.

There's a huge distinction in being able to "date" (and I use that term loosely) beautiful 19-year-olds and actually marrying one and keeping her more than a month after her arrival.

[Misha]

I have had non-romantic interactions with many business women in FSU of all ages, but mostly 30 to 60s.

Without exception, they all pat my stomach and say:  "No, no,   I like, don't
make it go away."

They often point to a skinny guy and say:  "We don't like that look"

Ah, but what do you think they would be saying if they were chatting up the skinny guy?  :evil:

[mies]

A couple of new threads now discuss the subject of appearances so I thought to round it out and ask the ladies here to state their preferences in men's appearance.  It would be nice to get the do's and don'ts and where appearance stands as a mate selection criterion.  

appearance is the first thing I notice (unless man starts talking before I see him) - so usually it is quite important for me.
I like handsome, groomed, toned men, who walk straight and with self-confidence, but without arrogance and menace.

I totally love skinny looks - in men and women. I don't like overweight, or over-muscled people.

ManLooking - they are just casually complimenting you, don't be so stupid to believe they actually like bellies. There even is a saying in Russian "I don't like compliments - I don't like lies". That's exactly about your case of women liking bellies and disliking fit guys   How naive some men can be - is beyond my understanding.

[mies]

Ah, but what do you think they would be saying if they were chatting up the skinny guy?  :evil:

Misha as always - is a source of distilled wisdom 

[Shostakovich]

Sure, appearance is the thing that belongs to it. An inherent part of personality. A shell that is to be associated with beloved man.

My guess would be that a good answer is in another thread, given also by you Shosty and Sartre, "Every depth requires a surface". Appearance should vouch for good genes, great health, physical strenght, and intelligence.

However, what particular appearance should a man have in order to be attractive for a particular woman, is another thing, and a complicated one.

Old Sartre.  I did not get very far with his work.  I do remember reading 'No Exit'.  Sartre recasts the fundamental question and focuses on its implications for life in the 20th century: "What is life for?".  More often, in former times, this question was answered for most through religion. But with the decline of religion, Sartre understood, like Nietzsche the rootless quality of mankind.  There is 'No Exit' from the prison of one's own perspective, which, being partial, is never entirely satisfying.  One has individuality, which rather than be suppressed, as in puritan influenced times, instead should be, albeit often shabby, expressed and celebrated as one's only real truth.  This is not entirely positive, but becomes a long subject.  For example there are some groups who think they should celebrate as an individuating wrinkle conditions which, formerly, where clearly understood to be pathological.  Therefore, in the 20th and 21st centuries also, the point of view should be expressed through a surface. 

Well, a question arises concerning a small detail regarding Sartre's formulation: "All depths require a surface".  Alas, it seems, the surface is too often cultivated as a substitute for a depth.  Which leads some to the conclusion that all who emphasize the surface must therefore be superficially engaged.  No-no.  The depth commands the expression, thus, the old biblical notion holds good: "Know them by their fruits". 

The puritan ethos is still with us, which converse to the attitude of individuality, is not entirely negative.  In my experience I find the ones with the greatest depth often have the most conventional appearances.  But it is also true that one goes hunting for a neurosis when one attempts to comport the surface to conform to some societal norms when those norms are out of harmony with the inner world.  To model the surface as an expression of the inner world is indeed a complex business.  I'd dare to suggest, however, that the OP did not have such an ambitious project in mind.  Rather, the question was not general, but specific: what are the specific preferences in male appearance for the ladies here.  The OP has not declared, however, his motivation in making this query.  I'd like to reveal the secret at this time as I am contemplating a career change.  I'd like to be one of those fellows who writes the article in Cosmo, with titles such as: "Your relationship: hot or not".  Armed with the information I gather here, and the methods of statistical science garnered from a lifetime of labor in the field, might propose an article with a tile such as: "Elephantine shocker - the ladies like a looker too!". 

Our current sample size in response is rather low and so the conclusions I draw from this study must be presented with the caveat of low statistical confidence. This concerns me, and so while still interested in ladies positions on the question raised in the originating post, I, however, at this time, do also authorize responses intended to offer council to me on my emerging career ambitions.     

[Misha]

Misha as always - is a source of distilled wisdom 

Спасибо