Trench's Questions and Philosophies

[Boethius]

What like another guy after I have paid for everything, no not really

You do realize this is another person, with her own will and mind, right? 

My focus is on finding a girl to have children with, never mind education & careers they are often oversold anyway and can really bugger things up. If you start her off on the railroad track off either of those things she will go off in that direction and that is the problem I am trying to get away from with western women. Why would I want to socialise her as a western woman it's just femininism gone mad, it would ruin the relationship.

LOL.  Well gee, yes, you are correct.  FSUW don't work, they sit at home becoming brood mares for their men. 

[GQBlues]

My focus is on finding a girl to have children with, never mind education & careers they are often oversold anyway and can really bugger things up. If you start her off on the railroad track off either of those things she will go off in that direction and that is the problem I am trying to get away from with western women. Why would I want to socialise her as a western woman it's just femininism gone mad, it would ruin the relationship.

Well I believe Billy has had children with his current wife so it's ok for her to then go to college. No way would I send a girl to collage before she had ar least a couple of kids loads of guys would be cracking onto her. Your at college Kyn I'm sure you can appreciate the razor sharp social skills some guys are all too confident at displaying. Sure some posters will no doubt set upon what I say here but my opinion is that it's a foolish move to make without something to tie her to you just asking for trouble.

I grant you did declared the statement above to be only an opinion at this time.


Let me share my actual experience on this subject. My wife was 21 when we got married. She's cute enough to have placed top tier (didn't outright win it) in the Ms. Novosibirsk beauty competition. So being a 'babe' isn't solely my opinion.


When I met my wife, she was attending her university and was one of the top students in her class. She was even receiving monthly stipend because of it. So when we got married I made a promise to everyone and myself that I will commit every resource in my means to ensure my wife explore her ambition to its fullest potential. She went on to attend a California State University and received her degree.


Fast forward to present time. 13 years since she arrived, 7+ years since becoming a US citizen, 8 years since graduating at Cal-State, her professional future is limitless. She's fully in charge of her department with an ever growing clientele. At the rate of her progression, she'll soon be in a partnering positional role in her company. At present she's a senior tax manager handling mostly corporate, FI (financial institution), banks, etc with 3 managers working directly under her, ( two of which are actually a little bit older than she)...her company not only have offices worldwide, but actually have offices in both St Pete / Moscow. FWIW, she can ask for transfer anywhere at a moment's whim if she so desires.


She's got a primary home and 2 rental units under her name today. Her FICO score has been above 800. Drives an Audi which will soon be replaced with Elon's creation, and an annual compensatory package in excess of $250k/yr. She's barely 32.


My wife has total command of her life. I am not at all concerned, much less worry about, my marriage and relationship with my wife. Never has, never will. Materially, (we) she has everything that she could possibly want today. Personally, 2018 will bring an even better life with, within and to our marriage to complete it.

Last Xmas we gave 'token' Christmas gifts to one another like we always do. They are symbolic of how we feel towards one another (since we literally have everything else in life materially), or more to the point, how she feels about me and her marriage with me. I'll share two of what she gave to me symbolic of what she feels. See below...

All I did with my wife was provide her the canvas. She did all the work, and I'm so much better for it all. No regrets.

My reality v your 'opinion'. I no longer need to hope with mine, but will wish you good luck with yours.

[JayH]

I grant you did declared the statement above to be only an opinion at this time.


Let me share my actual experience on this subject. My wife was 21 when we got married. She's cute enough to have placed top tier (didn't outright win it) in the Ms. Novosibirsk beauty competition. So being a 'babe' isn't solely my opinion.


When I met my wife, she was attending her university and was one of the top students in her class. She was even receiving monthly stipend because of it. So when we got married I made a promise to everyone and myself that I will commit every resource in my means to ensure my wife explore her ambition to its fullest potential. She went on to attend a California State University and received her degree.


Fast forward to present time. 13 years since she arrived, 7+ years since becoming a US citizen, 8 years since graduating at Cal-State, her professional future is limitless. She's fully in charge of her department with an ever growing clientele. At the rate of her progression, she'll soon be in a partnering positional role in her company. At present she's a senior tax manager handling mostly corporate, FI (financial institution), banks, etc with 3 managers working directly under her, ( two of which are actually a little bit older than she)...her company not only have offices worldwide, but actually have offices in both St Pete / Moscow. FWIW, she can ask for transfer anywhere at a moment's whim if she so desires.


She's got a primary home and 2 rental units under her name today. Her FICO score has been above 800. Drives an Audi which will soon be replaced with Elon's creation, and an annual compensatory package in excess of $250k/yr. She's barely 32.


My wife has total command of her life. I am not at all concerned, much less worry about, my marriage and relationship with my wife. Never has, never will. Materially, (we) she has everything that she could possibly want today. Personally, 2018 will bring an even better life with, within and to our marriage to complete it.

Last Xmas we gave 'token' Christmas gifts to one another like we always do. They are symbolic of how we feel towards one another (since we literally have everything else in life materially), or more to the point, how she feels about me and her marriage with me. I'll share two of what she gave to me symbolic of what she feels. See below...

All I did with my wife was provide her the canvas. She did all the work, and I'm so much better for it all. No regrets.

My reality v your 'opinion'. I no longer need to hope with mine, but will wish you good luck with yours.

Sheesh GQ-- what is she doing with you !!  ( er  that's a joke btw!)
No wonder you are full of yourself ! ( That's not a joke !!)

And half joking -- that all would be Trenches dream -- a girl he can send out to work and make an income he  only dreams of !!


Seriously -- that really is a success story that all can aspire to achieve. The fact that she was young probably helped ie her life was ahead of her to create .

Without wishing to pry in any way -- what was/is her attitude to children -- and yours while I am asking.

[GQBlues]

It's a small triumph in wife's individual/identity. That's all it is so far really. That is what I was very careful with before considering her age at marriage.

'Success' (or failure) isn't in my definition when it comes to our marriage. I don't pre-occupy myself with that. I think even if we are married for the next century it will be as subjective then as it is now, or 5 years ago. Or, if anything happens and we severed our marriage today, as long as she's happy and feel fulfilled, from my POV, I've succeeded if I'm true in my heart and mean what I say that 'her happiness is all that's important to me'. Wifey will be fine from here on in with or without me. She's more than established and independent as a person, on her own. Having and loving each other still is wonderful! So, that's a small triumph I definitely can take pride and joy in. All I can really 'control' is do my very best. It's up to wifey to deem it's merit, me to her likewise.

To address your last question, I addressed this on my post re: 2018. We experienced a momentary stumbling block but nothing we weren't able to cope with and move forward on.

[Trenchcoat]

You do realize this is another person, with her own will and mind, right? 

LOL.  Well gee, yes, you are correct.  FSUW don't work, they sit at home becoming brood mares for their men.

Sounds good to me

Sure she has her own mind and will, I am just saying what she decides up front she should stick to if she says she want family, children then that is what she shall get, if she says education, etc I will tell her she is on her own on that one and good luck in finding a guy that will facilitate that for her. On hearing this if she decided education is not as important as she thought it was then all is good. If she later decides shortly after getting with me she's changed her mind and wants education then it up to her to sort that, pay for it herself and make travel arrangements. Way I see it if she stated she wanted children then changed her mind why should I stump up when I was misled. If you're to soft on FSW as I have found out they will walk all over you and play you for a fool.

[Davo2]

I have found out they will walk all over you and play you for a fool.

That's because you've yet to find the perfect woman for you, someone you will share an amazing emotional connection with.
When she comes along, you won't care if she wears jeans, goes to uni, gets hit on by other guys or maybe even decides she doesn't want kids. No other woman will compare and she will feel the same about you. You will be incredibly soft and understanding with her, even if her needs in lifespan differ from yours, as her happiness will be a higher priority than your own. That's what marriage and love is all about.

Somewhere along the line you've lost sight of this or have never experience it as your comments don't sit well with most who have been in, or are in a loving relationship where there is genuine trust and mutual respect.

Honestly you would struggle to keep one of the over weight, entitled local girls you say are your only option

[Sting23]

Sounds good to me

 If she later decides shortly after getting with me she's changed her mind and wants education then it up to her to sort that, pay for it herself and make travel arrangements. Way I see it if she stated she wanted children then changed her mind why should I stump up when I was misled.

nice attitude, no wonder the girls aren't lining up to meet you. so you're gonna make your wife pay for her own education and everything else because she wants to improver her lot...did you not even read the story above with GQ. His wife is making 250K now after university.

All you're worried about is her leaving you after she uses you. No wonder you can't even get a date.

[Trenchcoat]

nice attitude, no wonder the girls aren't lining up to meet you. so you're gonna make your wife pay for her own education and everything else because she wants to improver her lot...did you not even read the story above with GQ. His wife is making 250K now after university.

All you're worried about is her leaving you after she uses you. No wonder you can't even get a date.

Are you naive? You really think she earns $250K as a result of attending University, lol, hilarious! GQ is obviously loaded and he set his wife up with the lucrative business operation. By the sounds of it he has so much money it's of little consequence to him. If every guy could expect this sort of result who just had a normal salary we would all be doing it.

Guys come on here and tell others how well they have donever and some have. Many I think though don't tell us of the back story as to why their wife us so devoted to them, etc. I think there are guys on this forum more often not American who are very wealthy. They turn up in the FSU and to FSW it is like God has called into town. Of course many are going to throw themselves at them with all the enticements at stake.That or they can look forward to living out a deary life in Dumps. Wake up.

[Jumper]

Are you naive? You really think she earns $250K as a result of attending University, lol, hilarious! GQ is obviously loaded and he set his wife up with the lucrative business operation. By the sounds of it he has so much money it's of little consequence to him. If every guy could expect this sort of result who just had a normal salary we would all be doing it.

Guys come on here and tell others how well they have donever and some have. Many I think though don't tell us of the back story as to why their wife us so devoted to them, etc. I think there are guys on this forum more often not American who are very wealthy. They turn up in the FSU and to FSW it is like God has called into town. Of course many are going to throw themselves at them with all the enticements at stake.That or they can look forward to living out a deary life in Dumps. Wake up.

How do you know GQs wife did not  attain her own success?
Perhaps best to ask clarification, than assume things.

My wife already had her degrees before we married, she actually finished one after we had met ,and just prior to relocating here.
I certainly would  help her when and if she chooses to advance her education here.
(She's an accountant , has worked here, and with her skill set has had zero problem being offered employment with good compensation.)

Similar to GQ, I get gifts like this:


I'm certainly not wealthy, and
my wife actually  had no great understanding  of what I really did for a living when we married. Lol mostly because I remained fairly vague about it, partly because it's normally not something FSU women endure well, and partly because I was transitioning thru it  to other ,safer,directions anyway.
Basically she was confident  we'd get by ok, and that was enough.She also knew she could work, but mainly she believed in me, and whatever i decide to put my hands to, she fully  supports.
  That is whether it be truly lucrative, or just getting by. You see TC, she wants me to be happy in what I do ,and would gladly work also to contribute if needed to,to allow me a job I enjoyed versus one selected purely by monetary compensation.
I don't have to guess, because we have already been thru such decisions  as a couple. Ive had some great moments and highlights ,and some of the lowest points of my career during our marriage.Nothing has even slightly changed that basic mindset and mentality regarding those issues .

Your worry is over nothing if you take the time to establish a real relationship,with a good hearted person who actually loves you.

I find it incredibly ironic that you worry about mercenary women.

Your own approach is completely mercenary at it's root.

[jone]

Well, another low for Trench.

Yeah, she probably makes $250,000 a year.  And GQ doesn't do too badly either.  Makes for a nice lifestyle.  BUT!  They both sacrificed much to get there.   We're talking about LA.  People commonly make that type of money.  Where I live, the neighborhood, everybody pretty well does.

I have a friend of mine who is a Russian lady, married to a guy, and she does not work and does not have children.  She spends all of her days bouncing from one social calendar event to another.  They have a nice lifestyle but I wouldn't trade this couple's life for all of the tea in China.   Whether family or an important job, or some social significance, my life has to mean something, at least to me.  I salute GQ in making some important decisions very early on in his relationship. 

[Trenchcoat]

If that money was really that common I think most of America would live in California and the rest of it would be devoid of people. I think you make that sort of money Jone, GQ and the rest of the people you live by. I don't think you mix much at all with those that don't so you think it's all common place. I'm pretty sure GQ''s wife did not enjoy a stellar rise in financial status all of her own doing. Otherwise everyone would be millionaires.

[Trenchcoat]

Your own approach is completely mercenary at it's root.

How so? I pay to go meet her & her expenses while there. I pay to bring her in the country, I pay for English classes, living costs, clothing, entertainment, time when she is mot working, etc. Just because I say 'hey I don't also wish to foot the bill for a uni education for her' which would cost a fair wack and she probably already has a uni education from her home country. And after which she could swan off. I don't see how I am being mercenary here, I already would be paying for a lot. Your partner may have stuck around but there are many that don't. Take that Australian guy on here the other week, wife left him after she got an education & career and didn't give him the kids he wanted. Oh but I suppose that was down to a character flaw in himself, it's never the woman to blame of course!

[Boethius]

Sure she has her own mind and will, I am just saying what she decides up front she should stick to if she says she want family, children then that is what she shall get, if she says education, etc I will tell her she is on her own on that one and good luck in finding a guy that will facilitate that for her. On hearing this if she decided education is not as important as she thought it was then all is good. If she later decides shortly after getting with me she's changed her mind and wants education then it up to her to sort that, pay for it herself and make travel arrangements. Way I see it if she stated she wanted children then changed her mind why should I stump up when I was misled. If you're to soft on FSW as I have found out they will walk all over you and play you for a fool.

You should be putting that in your profile, or telling a woman from the get go, so as to not waste her time or yours. 


Women can have children and be educated, you know. 

[Fashionista]

How so? I pay to go meet her & her expenses while there. I pay to bring her in the country, I pay for English classes, living costs, clothing, entertainment, time when she is mot working, etc. Just because I say 'hey I don't also wish to foot the bill for a uni education for her' which would cost a fair wack and she probably already has a uni education from her home country. And after which she could swan off. I don't see how I am being mercenary here, I already would be paying for a lot. Your partner may have stuck around but there are many that don't. Take that Australian guy on here the other week, wife left him after she got an education & career and didn't give him the kids he wanted. Oh but I suppose that was down to a character flaw in himself, it's never the woman to blame of course!

Awww...

[Jumper]

If that money was really that common I think most of America would live in California and the rest of it would be devoid of people. I think you make that sort of money Jone, GQ and the rest of the people you live by. I don't think you mix much at all with those that don't so you think it's all common place. I'm pretty sure GQ''s wife did not enjoy a stellar rise in financial status all of her own doing. Otherwise everyone would be millionaires.

TC,not sure if this post was to me or not.

For what it's worth,
I don't live anywhere near jone or GQ.

I have perhaps 20 or 30 years ago.lol

That areas cost of living  is generally higher than average,but that would depend on where, and to where it is compared.
 The salaries are also generally higher, but that might leave the average disposable income the same, maybe less, it's all relative. It varies widely within California, much less across a nation as large as the US.
If you look at US population densities ,  as far as western states,people have traditionally flocked to California. Eastern states have simply been occupied longer lol.

I certainly *mix* daily with the average American TC. Lol!!
You know, the ones making the  national average salary ,working your typical job, wife,  kids ,one dog, one cat.etc.
I live in a typical suburban home in Indiana TC. It's a university town,but your basic slice of Midwest americana.

Again I wont speak for GQs wife's advance in her career ,I'd assume it was due mostly  to her really being smart and truly busting her butt in university,and during an internship, and continuing go do so.
  My brother (her age basically) had a similar rise thru a tech
internship , up to partner, and now bought the partners out and owns  a quite successful tech firm. Since I know very well his background was not funded by anything but his own work in high school to struggling to pay for university, i know its possible on brain and busting your butt.
Sure location would play a role as more opportunity might be available in that field there .
And certainly my brother would have had an easier time if my father (his only parent)had been in a position to support him financially thru university period. So I'm not saying support or contacts don't help, of course they can,but may not have been the big factor.(id say my father instilling in him a great work ethic and great ethical and moral character was a bigger key than anything, I know my brother would tell you that quite clearly )

Anyway,
 I recommend, if curious about her career path , that you ask ,rather than assume.Thats all.

[Jumper]

How so? I pay to go meet her & her expenses while there. I pay to bring her in the country, I pay for English classes, living costs, clothing, entertainment, time when she is mot working, etc. Just because I say 'hey I don't also wish to foot the bill for a uni education for her' which would cost a fair wack and she probably already has a uni education from her home country. And after which she could swan off. I don't see how I am being mercenary here, I already would be paying for a lot. Your partner may have stuck around but there are many that don't. Take that Australian guy on here the other week, wife left him after she got an education & career and didn't give him the kids he wanted. Oh but I suppose that was down to a character flaw in himself, it's never the woman to blame of course!

How  so..

Your mentality is all from a position of what you will get from the relationship.
Or what return you will get from your troubles and expenses.
Or concerns of what you wont get, or wont keep getting  long term.


If any concerns cross your mind about her adapting to your culture and country, they are only from the mindset that *if she doesn't like it she might leave ,or leave for a more wealthy bloke*

You also worry over your time spent in communicating,  if there is no fairly immediate positive result.
You don't seem to be able to have a conversation with a fsu women unless it is
perceived to end up  in a lifetime of marraige to you.

It's a mindset of return on investment.
Few other thoughts drive it.

So you tell me TC,.
How can you define mercenary any more clearly ?


You tell me it's because you pay for this or that along the way,.but you do it only for a positive result for yourself.
Even a mercenary purchases ammo.


I'm not trying to bash you,  im really not.
I'm trying to reach you. To  get you to look in the mirror.
To look at your own motivations and thoughts that are both limiting your chances for true love, and will also  be self fullfilling prophesies of your fears.


My wife adores me TC. Yes she's not only stood by me, but I could call her today and say,listen honey. Im quitting my job,it's too hard on me and stressful. Her reply would be ,* ok , of course! And stop worrying  We will be ok, I'll go to work .* that simple.
She does so,because that is her mentality and character, who she is.Also because she knows I do the same for her. No reservations, no thoughts of if what's,returned is equal value.

How are you going to find that, with your own mindset of not wanting to do anything for her that might make her less dependent on you?



Even selfish people find partners, so you've hope


But the fact you don't even consider yourself mercenary , should be as wake up call to you for some self examination.

I'm really glad you wernt looking back in the late 90s.
You should thank your lucky stars the situation has improved in the FSU.
Back then any number of desperate women would have read you like a book, played ththe role of subservient and endearing,  said *yes darlink* to you about everything, not asked for anything, and ultimately used you.They would have easily fooled most anyone,and sorry,but you would have been very easy for them to read and play.
You have concerns over that now,mostly from a poor perspective as women have already shown they won't just play the easy role they can easily see solely for immigration




I'm not trying to sound condescending,
I need to improve as well, I hopefully learn something towards being a better person, husband, and father each day. Obviously I've a lot of work to do still.

I hope you at the very least start thinking of how you can be a better version of yourself,
And not just because it might make you more interesting to women lol as again thats just improving yourself ,only in the hope of a return in that  investment from others

My advice is just honestly and consciously  try to be a better you for now.
Relationship stuff will then fix itself.

Good luck. I mean that sincerely.

[GQBlues]

If that money was really that common I think most of America would live in California and the rest of it would be devoid of people. I think you make that sort of money Jone, GQ and the rest of the people you live by. I don't think you mix much at all with those that don't so you think it's all common place. I'm pretty sure GQ''s wife did not enjoy a stellar rise in financial status all of her own doing. Otherwise everyone would be millionaires.

First off, I don't have the money Jone has, nor am I as rich as AJ is. Heck, I don't even own a motorcycle....I was likely the poorest s*on-a-b*tch that ever landed in the FSU tarmac. Ugliest, too. Sadly TC, your highly-skeptical, narrow vision of life and living had given a very sad perspective in many of your expressed, and shared, opinions of everything and everyone.

I’m somewhat surprised too living in one of the world’s cosmopolitan metropolis that you seem lacking in awareness of corporate-level standard, TC. Not sure if this is a testament of the wonderful city that is London, or maybe just your very narrow vision of the world you’ve been living in. Methinks the latter based on your shared life’s perspective in everything else including your social principles. Methinks you’re the one being ‘naïve’ in more than one facet of today’s life, TC.

Accounting is a brute of a career to choose. It has a very high turnover rate and it goes through a schedule grind like no other even before graduating students have an opportunity to frame their diplomas. In LA, especially with the industry’s big-4, graduating students are always courted/recruited to fill staff positions. Their base pay (which seems to me is what everyone may have missed, salary vs compensation package) can range anywhere from $45-60K/yr – depending on merit. If you survived the first or second year, one becomes a Sr. Staff. $85K-110K. Again, performance/merit based. Then Manager, then Senior Manager. You can see the escalating compensation scale. FWIW, before graduating, wifey was elated to have gotten a 'paid internship' (many are unpaid internships). Her first pay in this career was $12.00/hr.! LOL. Man, I remember her being so happy about it, too.

The period between being a staff to (sr.) manager is a beast! While not literally, though with exceptions, during ‘busy season’ these guys work 24/7 for 2-3 months straight roughly twice/year. Trust me, many couldn’t cut it their first year. Many more when they go from Sr. Staff to Managers. This was arguably the worst period for my wife, and likely the most taxiing to our marriage. Accounting folks dubbed it ‘divorce-maker’. They’re not kidding.  No such things as life-work balance. Spouses, like myself, have had to wear more than a few hats. Best I can describe my perspective on this is, it’s akin to being an anvil and a sponge for your spouse at the same time, every minute of every day. I had to be her anvil so she has a place to pound her frustration on, and at the same time learn to absorb her angst – and be a reminder these, too, will come to pass. I was scratching and clawing our walls every time her busy period comes rolling in. I used to joke my wife that when they receive their respective bonuses that spouses should equally get the same considering what we all had to go through along with them.

As you climb the proverbial ladder, your responsibilities and expected knowledge goes right along with it. The industry have very little tolerance for ambivalence and mediocrity.

Theoretically, sure anyone can do and get to where wifey is today. Anyone. Except I doubt anyone can ace the 4 CPA exams on their first attempt/s like wifey did. It is also obvious to me, based on wifey and her colleague’s progression, not everyone is tailored for this business mentally either.

Compensatory packages isn’t just ‘salary’, or, more commonly known as ‘base pay’. The package includes, always but not limited to, (cash) bonuses, stock options (401K), commissions (IA), corporate card account, etc…what range you’re in in this level is strictly performance/merit based again. This is not socialism communism where everyone gets compensated the same regardless of productivity. This information can be easily checked/verified on the internet, you know. IINM, the *base pay* range for her position is about $140K-$<200K.

As special wifey is to me, her career path is certainly not unique. I think this has largely to do with her being an 'immigrant' just like myself. Immigrants are afforded the experience of knowing what both sides of the fence is like. So we tend to look at opportunities for what they are, and one never to take for granted.

At her present level, wifey is at the very height of compensation for her level range. Thus, the next logical ‘step’ is to become a partner. Something which wifey isn’t sure she wants. The whole BD (business development) affair. She tells me maybe she’d like to get out of public accounting and enter the private industries.

[GQBlues]

...She's barely 32....

Yikes! Correction. Wifey's 33, soon to be 34.

She's still a babe as ever, though.

[Jumper]

First off, I don't have the money Jone has, nor am I as rich as AJ is. Heck, I don't even own a motorcycle...

Lol I dint always own my own back then either , paid to ride them doesnt mean you get to keep them, they are generally crushed for fear of competing companies stealing the new development tech. Sad really, but understandable.

I have a couple now, but have actually sold off most of my stable, just don't have the time to ride or race anymore with the wee one.

[krimster2]

there’s a certain category of poster here on RWD that displays an embarrassing lack of empathy for any human being other than themselves.  these posters just can’t stop themselves from repeatedly providing us all with their grandiose fictional self-descriptions, it’s kind of a rule here...

if you view their fictional narrative from the perspective of what insecurities drive this narrative, you will get a MUCH clearer picture of who they REALLY are.

and certainly a much more entertaining one...

also, the stuff they leave out is always much more interesting then whatever self complementing fiction they write!!

unfortunately, most of you will not understand this, and take their “stories” as the literal truth.

[ML]

also, the stuff they leave out is always much more interesting then whatever self complementing fiction they write!!

Well, that is probably true about the 'interesting' things.
But in the past (before RWD) I had gotten tired of telling the true story that I come from European royalty on both sides of my family.
So now I have switched to talking about my career as a professional wrestler.

[Trenchcoat]

GQ didn't you say your wife earned $250k with offices around the world? Now you seem to he saying she is earning less than half of that as an accountant.

Jumper, a lot of FSW on the FSU dating scene state they want children, often as number 1 priority  and of course a husband. So for many we would both be wanting the same thing. I think beyond that both sides have an idea of what they want, a girl may want clothes, a nice home, work less or whatever. A guy may also have wants, her to look sexy, do the cooking, domestic chores, etc. I don't see it as a mercantile exchange just different desires. That and not being a fool and messing up something good that you have going by sending her off somewhere where a load of studs are going to be trying to pull her on a daily basis. Even with a girl who you have won her heart may be won by some other guy. For me it's about not making a effort by doing FSU dating only to stuff it up by exposing her too quickly to other possibilities which would not be in my interest.

[GQBlues]

GQ didn't you say your wife earned $250k with offices around the world? Now you seem to he saying she is earning less than half of that as an accountant...

Nope. The post is still upthread. Here's an average senior tax manager 'base pay' rate compiled by Glassdoor, not including stock options (401K), bonuses, commissions (IA), etc...which are directly correlated to performance. How much they are ultimately given is directly based on a CPA's performance to make up their annual 'total compensatory package'.

http://www.glassdoor.com/Salaries/los-angeles-tax-senior-manager-salary-SRCH_IL.0,11_IM508_KO12,30.htm

Ranges from $140K - $194K just as stated above, with an average base pay rate of 158K.

There are different tax managers (accountants) i.e. corporate (financial), bankruptcy (forensic), individual, audit, etc...each have varying levels of base pay.

[Davo2]

Even with a girl who you have won her heart may be won by some other guy.

If this happens you haven't done enough to get to know the woman and if she has a strong sense of morals, before you get married. I've made this mistake myself.

My ex wife is slim and attractive and so are several of the women I've dated since my divorce. The first girl I dated was 28 and men would flirt with her constantly, even in the supermarket. It's just a fact of life that men will hit on and flirt with an attractive woman, sometimes when you're with them. Unless you're with her 24/7 you have to accept this.

If this is a hang up for you and you can't trust her, it will do your head in. No matter what you think now, it's something you have absolutely no control over, without being possessive. If you behave like that, she'll sense you don't trust her, you'll eventually push her into the arms of another guy  anyway.

[Jumper]

unfortunately, most of you will not understand this, and take their “stories” as the literal truth.

So within this thread what related *stories* don't you believe?

Hadn't noticed any  over the top or unreasonable.