Wyoming Mike home from Ukraine

[392ihc]

Hello to all!  Wow, have I learned a lot from my two weeks in Ukraine!  I followed the advice given here to go ahead on my trip even though several of the women I had corresponded with dropped off of the radar when i told them I would be arriving in Kiev... and I am glad i did. I don't have a Mrs. to answer the first question. Actually I am not sure what I have except a lot a valuable experience. Let me tell you more...
   I met Dale's wife on the plane from JFK as he had offered. She was very kind and helpful to me. I thank him and his wife Alona. We were not able to talk on the plane very much but she waited for me in the customs area and again after customs. She said something to the guard there as he came over and waved me through so I didn't even have to stand in line!  My thanks.
   The one woman who still agreed to meet me was at Borispol and recognized me as I walked out of the customs area. She had arranged for a taxi to take me to the city center where my flat was located. She spoke very little English but we had corresponded for maybe six weeks and wanted to meet. After exchanging currency, paying for flat, she helped me buy a KievStar phone, some groceries, and then we walked to a park. I had to write everything as she was a better reader of Angleskee. I finally understood she was leaving Kiev for Russia that afternoon for Easter. We only had maybe four hours together. She was very pleasant but then we couldn't understand a great deal of what the other said. She had a dictionary which we used continually. I paid her fare to come to Kiev (she lives in Kharkov) and walked her to her bus when the time arrived. Then back to my flat to cook my own dinner and try to sleep.
   The next day I called the Marriage Agency which was only a block from my flat!  They had arranged five meetings of women I had chosen from their web site earlier. The first meeting was with Larisa(1) from Kiev.  She was delightful and we ended up going to a fine restaurant for dinner after walking around town. She was very impressed with my knowledge of their history and classical music. We agreed to meet again for opera or ballet. The next day I met with Larisa(2). Again we walked and went to dinner. She took me on the metro to see Independence Square at night which is a beautiful sight.  I enjoyed her but not as much as Larisa(1) but she did ask me to call her later. The third day I took a train to Vinnitsa to meet a lady there. Now all the women I had selected claim to speak English. When I arrived an interpreter met me at the rail station and explained she would be translating for us at $5.00/hr. OK, I thought. Then I paid for the taxi to pick up this lady and go to another fancy restaurant!  She spent the first half hour explaining the liturgical and theological meaning of Holy Week to me--even though I told her I had been raised very religious and understood all of this. Then she told me all about her hangups with her mother from her childhood....all while we had this fancy dinner. Then she told me all was good with her ex-husband and they were great friends. I responded by telling her that I believed that if everything was that good they should never have been divorced!  And that I did not enjoy that kind of friendship with my ex-wife, and didn't expect to. She demanded an apology for insulting all women!!  I apologized but also told her she had a problem hearing the truth and I asked for the check.     Then back to the train station to return to Kiev.
   The next day I had my ballet date with Larisa(1).  We met at the opera theater and I thoroughly enjoyed the ballet and her. She spoke very good English with a French accent!  Afterwards at coffee I showed her pictures of my home town in Wyoming. I knew already that a lady who knew how beautiful she was, owned a summer home outside of Kiev, had lived in Brussels, wore Armani clothes, would not adjust well to Wyoming!  I said this to her and she agreed. It was all very up front and straightforward--just the way I like it.  We agreed, however, to stay in touch and be friends. She wanted me to tell her of my future dates and my impressions. I took the Metro back to the city center by myself.
   The next day the agency called and cancelled date #4; she had to go to the dentist or stay home and wash her hair or something!  I met date #5 at the agency that morning. This lady was my number one choice off of their web site. I had really looked forward to meeting this one!  But, damn, she was a nasty lady. She had not seen any pictures of me or my profile and couldn't remember what she had written on hers!  All she wanted to do was argue with me while she ordered wine and lunch for me to pay for.  I got away from her as fast as I could without being rude myself.  What a waste of time and money. Shows you the risk of "falling in love" with a picture on a profile! And I got to pay the agency $50.00 for the joy of meeting her!
   The following day I flew Aerosvit to Kharkov. I was met at the airport by Mila, the interpreter whom I learned of on this site. Mila was quite knowledgable and had arranged several meetings with ladies she knew personally.  We had two meetings that afternoon. The first one was with an MD who was only 33 (I am 60). She was like the one I had left the day before in Kiev...all she wanted to do was argue with me. Challenged everything I said and confronted me on how I could be a teacher of European History if I never had been to Europe before!  I asked her if one had to go to the moon in order to teach about the moon?  I explained that it was just as strange for us to discover that a 33 year old woman didn't even have a driver's license!  Then she argued with me about the weather!  The next lady was far more agreeable but no chemistry with her.
   The next day I had meeting with Larisa(3) and we instantly hit it off. It was certainly mutual as we both kind of looked at each other without knowing what to say!  Felt like junior high school!  But we talked, went to dinner and I told her I wanted to see her again. She spoke little English and Mila interpreted everything. I found it difficult to say some things through a third person! We went walking around city center of Kharkov (these women walk MILES in high heels over cobblestone streets!) ended up at a fancy restaurant. I got to buy a nice dinner for all of us...  Larisa(3) was delighted with the pictures I had brought of Wyoming and my town. We agreed to meet again.
       The following morning I received a message from Alena, who had met me at Borispol a week earlier then left for Russia. I had been trying unsuccessfully to reach her all week.  I had given her up for lost. Never chase a woman who doesn't want to be caught!  Now she had returned to her home in Kharkov and wanted to meet!  Later that day Mila had arranged a second meeting with lady #2 whom I had lost interest in after meeting Larisa(3).  I did it since it was already arranged. Then, finally, a second meeting with Larisa!  It was the weekend and we walked in a huge park. I gave her some gifts which she truly seemed to enjoy. I gave her all the pictures of my home and pictures from Wyoming. She gave me a kiss on the cheek! We went on a ride there at the park. Then we went on a cable car up to a higher level of the city. It was very pleasant for me. Then dinner again. After dinner we were talking about dancing and she wanted to know how to country/western dance...so I showed her!  We danced right there in the restaurant.  She blushed but seemed to enjoy my daring nature. I also showed Mila the same dance steps. They were both great sports!
   I had one more meeting with a new lady the following day but it was of no consequence since I already was captivated by Larisa!  Then...I met Alena again, just the two of us without Mila. I found I still really liked her!  I arranged another meeting with Alena for the next morning. The next morning Mila wanted to meet me to return the key for the flat, etc. and I told her I couldn't until later as I was seeing Alena. (I had told her all along about Alena.  She knew before I even flew to Kharkov). I met with Alena for breakfast and more walking... Then I decided to seek Mila's help as an interpreter for Alena and I!  This was a little awkward since Alena was not one of the ladies Mila had selected for me. but she was professional and even warmed up some to Alena.  The three of us rode together to the airport and Alena waited with me inside. Finally I got a kiss from her when no one was watching! Then I boarded my plane back to Kiev.
   I had one day in Kiev before the Delta flight to NY.  I sms both Larisa(3) and Alena. Received replies from Alena. Finally home with serious case of jet lag and fighting a cold. Sent e mail to Mila and Alena and a sms to Larisa.  Sent Larisa sms IN RUSSIAN; no reply. Then yesterday I received an email from Alena telling me I had deceived her about Larisa! (I had told her from the start about Larisa and my meeting her and that I liked her also).  So, I don't have a clue where any of this will end up. I will try to stay in touch with these two women, if I can.
   I came to trust Mila both as an interpreter and as a friend.  She truly seemed to enjoy both her work and my company.  Sometimes I enjoyed her more than I enjoyed the lady I was intended to meet!  I have every confidence that she provided the best experience possible for me while I was in Kharkov.  I also met her husband while there who was pressed into taxi duty for us. He is, likewise, very pleasant and helpful.  If I return to Kharkov I will certainly seek the services of Mila again in arranging meetings as well as interpreting for me. Since Larisa(3) is taking English lessons from Mila, I am still dependant on Mila for future contacts with Larisa!
   I made other friends, like my taxi driver and the clerk at one of the snack houses by my flat, and others. I was even appoached by a attractive UA woman on the street asking for directions!  That told me I was blending in well enough!  I told her, in Russian, that I did not speak her language. Everywhere I went I met interesting people. Everything was new and very exciting for me. I was even told my pronounciation of Russian was very good!  I did things I have never done before and that, in itself is a good thing. It is true that the gene pool in UA allows for the most beautiful women in this world!  To see so many 40+ yr. old women who only weighed about 110 lbs. was incredible to me!
   I don't know if I will go back...too early to tell. If I do it will be for one woman with whom I have stronger feelings. I doubt I will go back just to meet random women that others choose for me.  I have much more I could write about my trip but this is already long enough! Thanks to all who gave me such valuable advice and encouragement!
   On a humorous note I will end with the observation that if you do not want to stand out in UA you should do the following things:  1) walk everywhere with a plastic bag of something,  you can carry whatever you want, just make sure you have a plastic bag, 2) do not wear a baseball cap, and 3) wear a black leather coat even if it is 80 deg F outside and the sun is shinning! You will blend right in!  I met perhaps some of the friendliest people of my life and also some of the rudest. You just have to take the good with the bad, just like here. I would have been totally lost if Mila had not suggested I buy a cheap KievStar phone.  Everyone sms text messages there. Here we only call since it is cheaper than texting. Finally, don't kiss a UA woman in front of the police in airports. You get hauled aside and grilled about your immigration form and the info on there and held until your plane is about ready to leave!
Mike

[Aloe]

Congrats on your first experience
Sounds odd, how do you have a date with a 3rd person present, i can't imagine, must feel really weird. Why don't you talk to ladies who already speak english? You can't hire a translator to live in your marriage Just my thoughts.

[Faux Pas]

Sah-weet! Sounds like you had a good time.   I am a little perplexed about Mila though. All I have read concerning her were rave reviews. It doesn't sound like she was a complete negative but, did you feel a bit impeded upon because Alona wasn't an interest of Mila? Did her services somehow fall to sub par because of that?

[392ihc]

Since writing my first " book" about my trip I have received a response from Mila regarding Larisa(3) and it appears she is still interested, which is good.  Larisa is also taking English lessons from Mila so I have an in through her.  No, Mila was professional throughout.  She was not warm about Alena, this is true, but perhaps she has better instincts than I do!!  Sometimes my choices are not always the best!
   And, I received an email from Larisa(1) reaming me a new one because I didn't call her and meet her for coffee my one day back in Kiev before I left!  I have apologized to her as well.  Seems like that's all I have been doing lately! I had no idea that such a meeting was so important to her!  American ignorance on my part.

[Gator]

Mike,

You passed!  Not with flying colors, yet you are ready for the next trip.  You did a lot of travelling.  Hopefully you will spend more time with fewer women, maybe jut one, on your next trip.

Clear answers should emerge from your post-meeting communications about  "who," "how many" and "when."

I also dislike the argumentative RW.  They are in abundance in the 38-45 yo age range, which I assume you were dating.  Be mindful that they usually argue because of wounded pride.  The RW who do not argue with you are probably also offended - thay are polite enough to bite their tongue (for now).

[Daveman]

Great report. Really enjoyed reading it.

One aspect which concerns me greatly... I mean BIG time.. is this... if Alena was not connected to the agency/group with Mila, she should not possibly have information about Larissa.  From what I read, unless I completely missed something, is that this accusation from Alena alter could have had only one source -- the common denominator.  

Even if Mila has a good vibe about people, and even if Larissa is a better match for you, the fact of the matter is that you paid for the services of a professional interpreter, an introduction "advisor",  but not the service of relational saboteur.  

I really hope I do not understand the situation correctly because Mila has a good reputation here, but this absolutely doesn't make any sense. How did Alena learn about Larissa if she isn't involved in the same group?

Anyway, good luck!
Dave

Edit:

Okay, found it.
quote:
(I had told her from the start about Larisa and my meeting her and that I liked her also).

So, it was an act of self sabotage!! :-)  Umm, don't volunteer information!  If she asks you directly, be honest, but definitely don't tell an RW that you like another RW!!!!!  One of many things can happen.. 1) she'll kill you  2) she'll immediately lose interest in you  3) she'll IMMEDIATELY become very possessive, and try her best to win you, even if she doesn't even truly like you, just because she doesn't want another RW to win.  THAT is a strange phenomenon, but it really can and does happen. 

My Evelyn Wood Speed Trained Eyesight just ain't what it used to be.  Sorry for the misunderstanding and partial accusation.  I seem to have been Wr... Wrrrr, er... wrrrrrrooo..., um, not exactly correct with my assumption. My apologies.  I'd delete the post completely if ithad not already been read by many.

[GoodOlBoy]

Welcome back and congratulations 392ihc.

You have been to the "promise land" and back.

You Sir, have earned your stripes! 

Sounds like you met a wide variety of ladies. 

I look forward to your next trip report.


GOB

[kievstar]

What I got from his writing is he told Mila and both girls that he was seeing several ladies.  Women do not like guys who juggle women unless desperate so it does not surprise me relations cooled down a little bit after not making a choice on one girl after 2 meetings.

[392ihc]

Before this gets even more out of hand....I told Mila about Alena before I ever went to Kharkov.  I told Alena about Larisa.  I do not know if Larisa knows about Alena. I did not tell her since final meeting with Alena occured AFTER final meeting with Larisa, otherwise I would have told her also.  It has been said that honesty is the best policy but I tend to doubt it.  I would have been willing to lie to cover it all up but I am such a poor liar I piss off more people when I lie than when I tell the truth!  The only advantage in telling the truth is that you only have to remember one story!

[Daveman]

Before this gets even more out of hand....I told Mila about Alena before I ever went to Kharkov.  I told Alena about Larisa.  I do not know if Larisa knows about Alena. I did not tell her since final meeting with Alena occured AFTER final meeting with Larisa, otherwise I would have told her also.  It has been said that honesty is the best policy but I tend to doubt it.  I would have been willing to lie to cover it all up but I am such a poor liar I piss off more people when I lie than when I tell the truth!  The only advantage in telling the truth is that you only have to remember one story!

Yep, we were posting at about the same time.. I edited my original post.  No need to ever lie because all it takes is to be caught in ONE lie, and trust is gone -- usually forever.  Just never volunteer more information than absolutely necessary. 

[Dave13]

Welcome back and congratulations, You did it,  95% of the guys just talk and talk and talk, but you got your butt on that plane! 

Best of luck

Dave

[JR]

It has been said that honesty is the best policy but I tend to doubt it. 

Hi Mike,
Congrats, you went where most men fear to tread!
Don't ever doubt that honesty is the best policy. Unless you are telling a woman who looks like shit that she "looks great!" you should stick with the truth.
But you don't have to offer everything. If they ask they should be prepared for the answer you give them. If they aren't then perhaps they've a little growin up to do

[Gator]

You guys are missing a very important point.  Women want honesty.  They want to know when they're wrong so that they can improve and become a better person.

[JR]

You guys are missing a very important point.  Women want honesty.  They want to know when they're wrong so that they can improve and become a better person.

Gator, women are always wrong. So what's your point?




Now THAT should start a fire

[OlgaH]

Gator, women are always wrong. So what's your point?

Now THAT should start a fire

if women were always right some of you probably would never be born 

[Daveman]

You guys are missing a very important point.  Women want honesty.  They want to know when they're wrong so that they can improve and become a better person.

 

now that was really hilarious.  Yes indeed.  and we honestly love to sleep outside.