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Author Topic: Language difference  (Read 3291 times)

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Offline eich

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Language difference
« on: August 20, 2019, 02:30:54 AM »
Does anyone know of a case where the woman did not speak the same language as the man she is corresponding with? If so, what happened? How did they deal with it? Perhaps this may have been an issue in the early days of online dating but even so, I’d be curious to know about their experiences.
Life is just an empty room.

Offline tfcrew

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #1 on: August 20, 2019, 03:48:32 PM »
Does anyone know of a case where the woman did not speak the same language as the man she is corresponding with? If so, what happened? How did they deal with it? Perhaps this may have been an issue in the early days of online dating but even so, I’d be curious to know about their experiences.
Eich...Last march you wrote this...
http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=22544.msg478247#msg478247
Quote
what happened?
What happened there? See --If you can't speak the same language, the obvious question is --How will you communicate? Early days or now..things are basically that.  Rather than posting in ''Experienced" ...Why not start off with "Starting Out"?
~There is no one more blind than those who refuse to see and none more deaf as those who will not listen~
~Think about the intelligence of the average person and then realize that half of the people are even more stupid than that~

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #2 on: August 20, 2019, 07:01:52 PM »
Does anyone know of a case where the woman did not speak the same language as the man she is corresponding with? If so, what happened? How did they deal with it? Perhaps this may have been an issue in the early days of online dating but even so, I’d be curious to know about their experiences.

Even so a good question, I think though that there is no easy answer even today. I've met with a few women that spoke very little English. It was difficult and made the going harder but not impossible. Mobile phone translators can help but they don't exactly add to the romance of the occasion. I've found FSW don't tend to take well to you typing away while they wait, nothing was said but I could tell by facial expression that after a while the tire off it, not straight away but after a few messages. It can be helpful if she has a mobile translation app on her phone so its not all one way though.

Some people hire terps and so long as you chose one and don't get ripped off then that can help a little, I've never done it for more that half an hour. I think short time periods of up to an hour here or there are ok but I'm guessing its not exactly romantic to have a terp hanging around all day.

Long and short of it, its best if one of you can learn the language. Usually it is her but I think if the guy wants the upper hand which is important out in the FSU then it can pay dividends for the guy to do it. I've started trying to learn it a bit more, I'm far from getting good at it but even learning the basic stuff better can help a lot when out there. You'll come across as more self assured and will be seen as less vulnerable. It will also open you up to more women.

In some ways once you learn Russian the big bonus will come once you take a girl back to your home country and to English speaking places in general in that - there's less chance of a guy succesfully hitting on your girl ;D Yhat's a big bonus in my book, just think of the jack the lad guy who wants to try it on with a potential Miss FSW hottie, but oh dear there's the language barrier :D Not fool proof but it will likley stop the girl from going off with one of a long stream of guys that may try it on.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline eich

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #3 on: August 20, 2019, 10:12:40 PM »
   Tfcrew, perhaps you misunderstood my question. I wasn't asking for myself. I simply asked out of curiosity because I often get letters from women that do not speak English and I received two more last weekend. But I ignored them as well as the others because I am no longer searching.
   What happened in my other post is not quite the same thing. The girl in that sorry episode did know English, enough that we could carry on a conversation. So what happened there was more an issue of personalities.
    But fortunately for me I have a growing ongoing relationship with a woman from Lviv that speaks English much better than my feeble Russian. We're planning to meet again in December when another kind of question may be asked.
Life is just an empty room.

Offline msmob

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #4 on: August 21, 2019, 12:45:33 AM »
Why are you receiving letters if you aren't searching ...and why wonder at all, if your lady speaks English ? ;)

All you'll get is the likes of Trench offering opinions...

Offline eich

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #5 on: August 21, 2019, 03:56:01 AM »
Because my long term subscription has not yet run out. But out of curiosity I will still look at letters that are sent to me until it expires - out of curiosity. Now I will repeat myself, I asked this question out of curiosity. Being curious is a normal thing. At least it is for me.
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Offline msmob

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #6 on: August 21, 2019, 05:42:58 AM »
Because my long term subscription has not yet run out. But out of curiosity I will still look at letters that are sent to me until it expires - out of curiosity. Now I will repeat myself, I asked this question out of curiosity. Being curious is a normal thing. At least it is for me.

As you say..each to their own..

As a WMVO guy, once I'd locked on and agreed to meet a lass, *I* stopped correspondence with other ladies - making it clear I was visiting one and one only .. no 'games'  and  no misunderstandings or 'curiousity', thereafter ...
« Last Edit: August 21, 2019, 08:01:00 AM by msmob »

Offline eich

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #7 on: August 21, 2019, 07:35:05 AM »
I did not say I answered or corresponded with them I said I just looked. Instead of judging me why not just answer the question?
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Offline msmob

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #8 on: August 21, 2019, 08:08:09 AM »
I did not say I answered or corresponded with them I said I just looked. Instead of judging me why not just answer the question?

I am judging you - that's for sure .. WHY are you still receiving  / reading such letters ?  I guess you don't mind if  your lady in Lviv does the same ? ;)

The reason WHY I'm 'judging' you ..this is a race ...  he who hesitates is lost ...

I've written to ladies who told me a guy was  in coming in 'x' months .. I suggest to them, "OK, so you've not committed,yet ...meet me " ..  and said guy was toast ..  We were together 2 years and the guy got to meet her 'a little late '  and stayed 3 days out of the planned 14 ..

Your question is hypothetical and depends on the character of both parties and willingness to learn 

I'd advice against dating someone for whom you need a 'terp' on hand ..though other have managed it ...



Offline lyndontom

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #9 on: August 21, 2019, 10:45:53 AM »
In some ways once you learn Russian the big bonus will come once you take a girl back to your home country and to English speaking places in general in that - there's less chance of a guy succesfully hitting on your girl ;D Yhat's a big bonus in my book, just think of the jack the lad guy who wants to try it on with a potential Miss FSW hottie, but oh dear there's the language barrier :D Not fool proof but it will likley stop the girl from going off with one of a long stream of guys that may try it on.


You have some serious trust and confidence issues. You will NEVER succeed with your prolonged attitude that someone will come and steal your woman. Simple fact is A) you should want to find someone who falls in love with you and vice-versa and B) Stop aiming so high if you can't attract and keep a good catch.

Offline lyndontom

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #10 on: August 21, 2019, 10:54:51 AM »
Personally I have gone beyond the stage where I could tolerate a language barrier. How can you understand each other's intentions and true feelings without being properly able to communicate, at least on a very basic level? I met many attractive women way back when (in my mid 20's) that I couldn't communicate with other than through terps and translation apps. I don't think I would have the patience for it now unless something/someone exceptional happened to come along.


Others have made it work, for sure. But I am also sure it has taken time, money and patience. Are you prepared to pay for her to have English lessons and have faith that you'll both benefit from it down the line? Are you prepared to learn Russian? What if you find out she's not the one down the line? What if you or she really struggle to learn? All also very hypothetical questions.


No doubt it makes the process feel more drawn out. I'm not sure how old you are, but I would think a language barrier could be easier to overcome for a younger couple because there is time and opportunity ahead. Then again, I have seen AFA and Dream Connections videos where older men seem prepared to overlook it. How naive/blinded they are in doing so is a different story.

Offline Gator

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #11 on: August 21, 2019, 12:35:13 PM »
I don't think I would have the patience for it now unless something/someone exceptional happened to come along.

The misunderstandings  require all of one's patience and then some more.

Don't attempt it unless the two of you can have fun without speaking more than a 100-200 common words. 

Offline msmob

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #12 on: August 21, 2019, 04:30:09 PM »
The misunderstandings  require all of one's patience and then some more.

Don't attempt it unless the two of you can have fun without speaking more than a 100-200 common words.

^^^

This.. :clapping:

Offline JayH

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Re: Language difference
« Reply #13 on: August 21, 2019, 10:26:45 PM »
The misunderstandings  require all of one's patience and then some more.

Don't attempt it unless the two of you can have fun without speaking more than a 100-200 common words.

Very neat observation. :clapping:

Unless well above average language skills are present the nuances and subtleties of the use of language will never be understood. Time together and familiarity can cover a lot of missing language.
None of that applies  on more important issues eg business and /or legal issues that need more than a headline.Then appropriate help is advisable.
As an aside -- I met a guy a few days ago who works extensively for American and EU   companies doing translation and interpretations in real life meetings  etc   and I mentioned one of my pet comments-- ie  there is often no exact translation that reflects the intent of a sentence   . He had lived in US for a year and has excellent English-even picking my accent! He 100% agreed with my comment.
That issue alone can lead to misunderstandings -- so if you don't have the ability to laugh easily together - then you may well have a problem. :)

For those that push learning the language - ( sure learn the alphabet and basics etc) it is a waste of your time that would be better spent in other areas. Unless you are gifted --or have an exceptional amount of time on your hands -the best most will ever get is very basic -unless living there for a SUBSTANTIAL amount of time and are immersed in it. Now- that works both ways and is worth remembering.
Would a lack of English deter me? No is the short answer.
SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

 

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