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Author Topic: Did I get scammed?  (Read 7533 times)

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Offline santo

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Did I get scammed?
« on: April 20, 2014, 04:57:56 AM »
I wanted to run my situation by some of you experienced guys. I am kind,of confused by it and think that maybe my last girl was some kind of amateur scammer.

For those of you not following along, I met her last year on EM. She is a Russian national living in Mexico.  After skyping for a few months, we met in Mexico and had a week vacation together.  Everything was normal during the trip, like a honeymoon, we were intimate, and we made plans for meeting again and planning to be together.  As soon as she returned home it was a little different.  She was evasive when I planned our next trip, but finally agreed to go for three weeks this time.  She did not video chat, and claimed that her ipad was lost and her iPhone camera not even able to send pics. She cancelled the trip the day before, claiming to have dengue fever.  I did not believe her so she got upset and said she never wanted to talk again.

I moved on and started chatting with a new girl about a month later.

She contacted me a couple months later and started saying how much she missed me but still did not want to be with me because of how I acted when she said she was sick.  I did not really pay much attention to her, but we would text once in a while.  This went on for a few weeks until she asked me to help her with an online purchase.  She asked me to buy about $100 of clothes for her online and she would pay me via bank transfer.  She said she was unable to purchase the items because they would not ship to Mexico.  At this point I did not really believe anything so I told her I would try my best, but didn't commit to anything. The next day she texted me that she had purchased the items through her male friend but couldn't make the bank transfer to him because the banks in Mexico were closed due to the Easter weekend. She asked that I send the guy $100 and she would pay me back.

I didn't send any money nor did I ever respond back to her.  It just seems like such a big effort for her to go through just to ask for $100. But the whole situation seems very hinky. In any case I am done with her, but I was just curious if you guys have seen a scam like this before.

Offline TheTraveler

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #1 on: April 20, 2014, 05:58:00 AM »
you didn't send any money or make the online purchase, so you weren't scammed .

i think you have her pegged correctly.  good on you for not getting scammed.

i laughed at her idea - 'you buy and i'll pay you back with a wire transfer.'

i would have replied - 'wire me the money and then i'll buy.'

better yet - just ignore her for good this time.

Offline santo

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2014, 06:21:11 AM »
Lol I just can't believe she went through all that effort just to ask for $100. I got the whole girlfriend treatment and everything during our vacay.

I'm getting ready to go see the new one in Russia. She seems more put together and sincere, but honestly at this point I'm a bit put off by my last experience.  What's the best way to go about this without getting scammed or wasting time?

Online Faux Pas

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2014, 06:29:14 AM »
Lol I just can't believe she went through all that effort just to ask for $100. I got the whole girlfriend treatment and everything during our vacay.

I'm getting ready to go see the new one in Russia. She seems more put together and sincere, but honestly at this point I'm a bit put off by my last experience.  What's the best way to go about this without getting scammed or wasting time?

Don't send any money

Offline XMan

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2014, 07:25:55 AM »
Faux Paus summed it up in 4 words quite accurately.

Don't do anything that you would not do for a woman you might date in your own country. 

I'm not saying ignore customs.  For example, people are generally expected to remove shoes at the door after entering someone's apartment.  (There are also usually slippers available.)

But don't try to use money / gifts to impress her, or that is what you'll be doing for the rest of however long your relationship lasts, which probably won't be long unless you have a lot of money you feel like throwing away.


Offline Larry1

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #5 on: April 20, 2014, 08:56:20 AM »
Quote
the whole situation seems very hinky

I agree.  And I agree with the others that the best advice to avoid being scammed is to not send money.


Offline santo

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #6 on: April 20, 2014, 09:24:40 AM »
I have the time and resources to travel.  I was thinking to just travel to Russia or Ukraine this summer and spend some time with boots on the ground.  This seems like the best way to meet someone and sniff out any scammers. 

Offline Chelseaboy

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #7 on: April 20, 2014, 09:39:24 AM »
If you can speak Russian or Ukrainian that's the best way to do it.


If you can't,you won't have a clue what's being said around you.
« Last Edit: April 20, 2014, 09:40:58 AM by Chelseaboy »
Just saying it like it is.

Offline Turboguy

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #8 on: April 20, 2014, 11:15:00 AM »
I agree with Chelseaboy.   I would not suggest just going unless you plan to couple that with some online efforts to meet women.  I have had tons of times when I had my boots on the ground and something in my plans had not worked out and I was left with time to kill.  I can't say I ever met a woman there during one of those down times.  Perhaps had I hit some night clubs that may have been different but just going is not a good way to find success. 


I can recall on my tour with Jack two very good looking members of the tour bought 100 roses and went out on the street passing them out to attractive women who wondered by and they totally struck out. 

Offline Gator

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #9 on: April 20, 2014, 11:45:44 AM »
Santo,

As we stated many times, something seemed wrong about your RW friend in Mexico.   When you find a good RW who is sincerely interested in exploring a close relationship with you, everything will seem right.  You still have to keep your eyes open, and you will still have a few questions that usually answer themselves over time.     

Hopefully your new RW friend is sincere.  I caution you not to concern yourself too much with possible scams.  A man fearful of scams may ask impertinent questions about something that could be a simple misunderstanding.  Your call, considering everything.   

About just going to the FSU and hanging out - you need to speak Russian and you need to recognize that very few women will be interested in a foreigner, especially in leaving her country.  The women you meet via agencies have already made a decision that they are open to the possibility of marrying a foreign man.   

Offline Larry1

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #10 on: April 20, 2014, 12:07:37 PM »
I would not suggest just going unless you plan to couple that with some online efforts to meet women.  I have had tons of times when I had my boots on the ground and something in my plans had not worked out and I was left with time to kill.  I can't say I ever met a woman there during one of those down times.  Perhaps had I hit some night clubs that may have been different but just going is not a good way to find success. 


I can recall on my tour with Jack two very good looking members of the tour bought 100 roses and went out on the street passing them out to attractive women who wondered by and they totally struck out.

I agree completely with Turboguy's advice.  It isn't so quick and easy to meet girls and begin a relationship with one in this way.  I had a friend who actually moved to Ukraine permanently.  He wasn't shy and was good-looking and in good shape.  He really worked it and managed to get many girls' phone numbers, but the vast majority flaked on him before even going out with him.  Eventually he found a terrific girlfriend but it took a long time.

It's a good thing to be able to spend an extended period in-country, but I agree with Turboguy's suggestion that you contact girls online in advance of your trip.  If you hit it off particularly well with one, then you can make a WOVO (write one, visit one) trip to see her.  But if not then set up a WMVM (write many, visit many) trip.  You don't necessarily have to confine yourself to just one city either.

Offline santo

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #11 on: April 20, 2014, 02:36:13 PM »
Awesome advice thanks. I have one that I have been skyping with for a few months that I am going to see in Russia.  I am going to take some language classes while there too.

Offline Larry1

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #12 on: April 20, 2014, 02:46:39 PM »
Awesome advice thanks. I have one that I have been skyping with for a few months that I am going to see in Russia.  I am going to take some language classes while there too.

You might consider applying for the new 5-year multi-entry Russian visa.  A friend of mine told me that the application was a good deal more involved than the application for the old standard 30-day tourist visa, but you wouldn't have to worry about getting a new visa for every trip.

Offline GregfromGa

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #13 on: April 20, 2014, 04:39:14 PM »
It was only a $100.  You should've sent the money. You did say you guys had a nice time right?

Offline ML

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #14 on: April 20, 2014, 04:48:18 PM »
It was only a $100.  You should've sent the money. You did say you guys had a nice time right?

Then she could send him $100.  Equal rights.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline GregfromGa

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #15 on: April 20, 2014, 06:48:03 PM »
Then she could send him $100.  Equal rights.

But she asked, he didn't. Tell you what Santo, PM me her contact info and picture. I'll figure it out for you. She lives in Mexico right? That's easy. Much easier to do that rather than fly to Lugansk. I've always wanted to go down Mexico way anyway. I mean we are all friends here and since you aint going back and all. It seems like that would be the RWD brotherly thing to do. Getting on a plane is not a problem for me. I live in South Georgia.Going to Mexico would be almost like not leaving home especially at Wal-Mart on a Sunday.

Offline Gator

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #16 on: April 20, 2014, 07:05:19 PM »
Yes, Greg, it was only $100 and she promised to pay him back when he came to see her again. 

The kicker:  he has spent time with her and does not want to see her again.  Clearly the $100 was merely a ploy to entice him to visit her again.  Why can't some women (and men) be forthright?

So you want to meet her?  You realize there are number of RW in America listed with Elena's Models, etc. 

Offline Barnes

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #17 on: April 20, 2014, 07:28:49 PM »
@GregfromGa
Hilarious +1

Offline santo

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #18 on: April 20, 2014, 11:08:05 PM »
What's the best way to go through an agency?

Offline Gator

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #19 on: April 21, 2014, 06:23:58 AM »
What's the best way to go through an agency?

Start with an agency that does not have a PPL (pay-by-letter) business model.  In PPL agencies, the women you write may never see your letter.  Instead, correspondence is fabricated by interpreters, and meanwhile, you pay a fee for each of the fake letters.  If you decide to take a trip to visit one of these women, she may not even show and the agency does a "bait and switch."   

Don't be discouraged.  There are good alternatives.  In an agency such as Elena's Models you pay a flat fee to join and prepare a profile of yourself (make it a good one, short and sweet).  You then review the profiles of the women (thousands) and send a "wink" (expression of interest) or a brief email to women who interest you.  If a woman responds favorably, you email her directly without going through the agency.  You are on your way.

Offline ML

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #20 on: April 21, 2014, 08:14:42 AM »
What's the best way to go through an agency?

Most probably go in the front door, circle around awhile, and then back out the front door.

You might try going in the back door; just to be different.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline BillyB

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Re: Did I get scammed?
« Reply #21 on: April 21, 2014, 01:24:10 PM »
What's the best way to go through an agency?


There's a thread at the top of the "Starting Out" forum that has a lot of good sites to use. Shop around and use what best suits you. Some of those sites are not agencies and offer no services. You communicate with the ladies directly for free or based on a fee.


Why are you asking this question after you earlier mentioned you will be visiting a lady in Russia soon? Just need help with apartment reservations or putting together a backup plan?
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

 

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