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Author Topic: Update - 13 years later  (Read 213014 times)

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Offline jazztropy

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #500 on: January 08, 2014, 12:05:25 AM »
I'm a late comer to this thread.  I'm glad to see the original poster had kept it alive for persons like myself to be able to benefit from his unique experience. I respect other users' privilege to throw in their 2 cents, but I still want my 2 hours back from reading the background noise.  Out of 21 pages, less than 3 are informative and the balance seem tangential to wildly varying degrees.  Patagonie's split thread is cool too.

Mr. NorthKape, please continue on, you are helping at least one person with your writing.

Online northkape

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #501 on: January 08, 2014, 09:32:23 AM »
Thanks for the support jazz

Pat
Just like 14 years ago, I was prepared to use whatever amount of effort that was necessary, for finding the right woman in my life.
But I didn't want to search for years, but rather to concentrate on maximum effort for a shorter period of time.
As it is clearly a numbers game,, the larger amount of numbers you are able to filter and meet, the closer you can get to your target.

Even if it doesn't give you any guarantee for happiness, you can at least start together with, what you feel is the right kind of a woman.

And yes, how to handle the "multiple woman at the same time" game is tricky, at best,,,,,,, smile

I lost many prospects because of this.
Early on in communication, I would try to hint at the wisdom of trying to communicate with more than one man, for the lady.
Of course many understood immediately then, that I was probably communicating with multiple women.
There were all kind of strange (mis)understandings of these realities related to Internet dating.
But most women I communicated with, were very active themselves, and even though I never asked about it, some of them asked me.
My answer was, that it is a necessity, for finding the right person to meet with, and that the meeting is when the relationship can start.

More tricky, is meeting multiple women at the same time without lying.
I tried to avoid it, telling them that I was visiting for business, and only had a few hours available, for meeting over a cup of coffee.
Some of them still understood, but with a smile, others also understood, while being hurt and losing interest.
For me, I would rather choose the one that understood with a smile,,,,,
so I considered it to be, just one more hurdle, my lady would have to pass for qualifying.

My previous "long" marriage with another beautiful, and very young Ukraine woman, was in my understanding, a big plus for me.
The facts about our ongoing divorce, my friendship with Lena, and me having the main custody of our boys,
was generally, also met with respect and admiration, from all but the most jealous ones.
(Women that wouldn't have been able to cooperate with Lena later, and the kind of women I wanted to avoid at all costs)

Most of all, many were very impressed, that Lena had been able to give birth to, and raise twin boys,
while at the same time, reeducating and then building a great career inside departments of the Norwegian Government.

Offline Gator

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #502 on: January 08, 2014, 12:36:45 PM »

More tricky, is meeting multiple women at the same time without lying.
I tried to avoid it, telling them that I was visiting for business, and only had a few hours available, for meeting over a cup of coffee.
Some of them still understood, but with a smile, others also understood, while being hurt and losing interest.
For me, I would rather choose the one that understood with a smile,,,,,

Me too, provided you returned the smile and did not push them for any sense of commitment. 

Although you were not forthright, you gave enough information such that the UW could determine the score.  Actually, the smart UW could determine that you were meeting other women without you having to say anything. 

I preferred the women who did not ask.  Volunteering  the "truth" is essentially  rubbing their noses in your complicated situation.   OTOH, one should not allow FSUW to leave the meeting with the wrong impressions. 

IMO it has to be finessed politely without false statements.   Other opinions may differ, particularly since the last WMVM trip I made was 8 years ago.

Offline Chicagoguy

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #503 on: January 08, 2014, 02:28:20 PM »
I find it easier to always tell the truth. I never could keep my stories straight if I lied  ;).
And there came a time when I had to tell my wife. But I could tell she already suspected. And that truth was the end of it.

Online northkape

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #504 on: January 08, 2014, 07:38:04 PM »
Gator
Almost no one asked me directly if I were meeting other women at the same time, but several of them were able to twist,
our conversation into a track where I had to admit something like:
"there was one other interesting woman I met with almost a week ago" instead of having to resort to an obvious lie.
I was telling the truth, but only a small and rather innocent part of it.
And the more advanced minds among them, probably filled in the missing pieces themselves, whether smiling or not....

Chicago
Yes, it is often easier to simply tell the truth.
But even in situations where you want to tell the truth, it is sometimes preferable to tell as little of it as possible,
to avoid hurting someone that will have a hard time accepting the bitter realities.

Further out in this trip report is Zap32, that became very sad, when understanding that I had been writing with,
and probably also meeting with other women than her,, after deciding to divorce.
Having no Internet dating experience, when she got started a few months earlier, she had been writing with me only.

Yes, let's get back to the trip report....

Meeting with lovely Kirhovorad32

The door on my passenger side opened abruptly,,,,
when turning around, I was looking directly into the face of a frustrated young woman, trying forcefully to smile at the same time.

"Ahh,, so this is were you had parked, I was thinking you were outside that supermarket on the other side of the road,
closer to the city limits,, you should have explained it more clearly for me, Jan... It is Ok,, I will drive in front of you, can you follow me?"
A little perplexed I stuttered,, "yes, my dear, I can"

Such was the beginning of my adventure with this mysterious "amazone", that I had been writing and Skyping with for months.

When calling her half an hour before arriving, it became clear to me, that I had been driving here much faster than what she had expected.
She told me to find a place for parking my car just after passing the city limits, and then to call her on the phone.
I had been sitting there, in my car, for almost an hour after calling her,
strategically parked outside a small supermarket, in case I wanted something to eat or drink while waiting.

I had agreed to meet with Kirhovorad32 from noon till evening, and then after work the following day,
which was more of a commitment than I would usually want to agree on.
But this was a woman I should have met with in the summer, if our schedules had matched at that time.
Even so, she was still kind of an unsolvable mystery to me, being very active on two different dating sites,
with a different name, location and photo for each of them, and being completely open about it, when I asked her.
Every now and then, she would ask what other women I was writing with, and what I didn't like about those I had met with.
(Much like Kiev32, who wanted me to show her the profiles, of all those I had met with, when staying with her in the summer)

As such, I was having some doubts about my position in her mind, not really understanding what she found interesting in me.
What got me,, was the attention she gave me before my trip, there was to be no doubt at all about her wanting to meet with me.
And we had such a great time together, whenever we were talking on Skype, that our meeting couldn't possibly be a total failure.
 
Following after Kirhovorad32's car, with her driving in front of me, proved to be an adventure in itself,
she was obviously familiar with every single pothole in the road, pedal to the floor like a Kiev cab driver about to miss an appointment .
After an eternity in time, spent driving behind her, she finally stopped her car outside an apartment block.
It had taken us almost 20 minutes, to drive across her city, to what I figured was the opposite side of it.

She got out of her car, locked it, and started walking towards me, while I was on my way out to open the door for her.
Did I ever have any doubts about my "amazone» being beautiful, they were definitely blown away at this moment.
She stopped in front of me with an inviting smile and opened her arms, showing me that she was ready to be hugged.
Returning her smile, I stretched my arms out and hugged her gently, before looking into her lovely smiling face again,
instant attraction it was……

more to come when time allows.....
« Last Edit: January 08, 2014, 07:53:25 PM by northkape »

Offline jazztropy

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #505 on: January 08, 2014, 07:50:15 PM »
Nooooh, don't stop!!!    Lol

Offline fathertime

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #506 on: January 08, 2014, 08:32:09 PM »
Gator
Almost no one asked me directly if I were meeting other women at the same time, but several of them were able to twist,
our conversation into a track where I had to admit something like:
"there was one other interesting woman I met with almost a week ago" instead of having to resort to an obvious lie.
I was telling the truth, but only a small and rather innocent part of it.
And the more advanced minds among them, probably filled in the missing pieces themselves, whether smiling or not....

Chicago
Yes, it is often easier to simply tell the truth.
But even in situations where you want to tell the truth, it is sometimes preferable to tell as little of it as possible,
to avoid hurting someone that will have a hard time accepting the bitter realities.

Further out in this trip report is Zap32, that became very sad, when understanding that I had been writing with,
and probably also meeting with other women than her,, after deciding to divorce.
Having no Internet dating experience, when she got started a few months earlier, she had been writing with me only.

Yes, let's get back to the trip report....

Meeting with lovely Kirhovorad32

The door on my passenger side opened abruptly,,,,
when turning around, I was looking directly into the face of a frustrated young woman, trying forcefully to smile at the same time.

"Ahh,, so this is were you had parked, I was thinking you were outside that supermarket on the other side of the road,
closer to the city limits,, you should have explained it more clearly for me, Jan... It is Ok,, I will drive in front of you, can you follow me?"
A little perplexed I stuttered,, "yes, my dear, I can"

Such was the beginning of my adventure with this mysterious "amazone", that I had been writing and Skyping with for months.

When calling her half an hour before arriving, it became clear to me, that I had been driving here much faster than what she had expected.
She told me to find a place for parking my car just after passing the city limits, and then to call her on the phone.
I had been sitting there, in my car, for almost an hour after calling her,
strategically parked outside a small supermarket, in case I wanted something to eat or drink while waiting.

I had agreed to meet with Kirhovorad32 from noon till evening, and then after work the following day,
which was more of a commitment than I would usually want to agree on.
But this was a woman I should have met with in the summer, if our schedules had matched at that time.
Even so, she was still kind of an unsolvable mystery to me, being very active on two different dating sites,
with a different name, location and photo for each of them, and being completely open about it, when I asked her.
Every now and then, she would ask what other women I was writing with, and what I didn't like about those I had met with.
(Much like Kiev32, who wanted me to show her the profiles, of all those I had met with, when staying with her in the summer)

As such, I was having some doubts about my position in her mind, not really understanding what she found interesting in me.
What got me,, was the attention she gave me before my trip, there was to be no doubt at all about her wanting to meet with me.
And we had such a great time together, whenever we were talking on Skype, that our meeting couldn't possibly be a total failure.
 
Following after Kirhovorad32's car, with her driving in front of me, proved to be an adventure in itself,
she was obviously familiar with every single pothole in the road, pedal to the floor like a Kiev cab driver about to miss an appointment .
After an eternity in time, spent driving behind her, she finally stopped her car outside an apartment block.
It had taken us almost 20 minutes, to drive across her city, to what I figured was the opposite side of it.

She got out of her car, locked it, and started walking towards me, while I was on my way out to open the door for her.
Did I ever have any doubts about my "amazone» being beautiful, they were definitely blown away at this moment.
She stopped in front of me with an inviting smile and opened her arms, showing me that she was ready to be hugged.
Returning her smile, I stretched my arms out and hugged her gently, before looking into her lovely smiling face again,
instant attraction it was……

more to come when time allows.....


Great story thus far NK, thanks for keeping it going...    question... Amazon=amazone?  or different significance?


Nooooh, don't stop!!!    Lol


Hey Jazztropy...i was just digging that other crazy avatar of yours and then you go and change it!  lol


Fathertime! 
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline jazztropy

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #507 on: January 08, 2014, 09:10:31 PM »
Thanks for noticing.  Lol

Offline calmissile

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #508 on: January 08, 2014, 10:34:31 PM »
As far as telling a woman you are visiting many women, the last strategy I used turned out to be the best for me.  I simply said I was on vacation and wanted to meet a lot of interesting people and was not on a mission to specifically find a wife.  Also, I wanted to visit many of the historical sites (all true).

Larissa must have figured it out on her own, because she latched onto me and tracked me all over Ukraine.  Like they say, if a FSU woman wants you.... there will be no doubt in your mind.....and you would have trouble escaping even if you wanted to.     ;D
Doug (Calmissile)

Offline jazztropy

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #509 on: January 08, 2014, 10:41:38 PM »
As far as telling a woman you are visiting many women, the last strategy I used turned out to be the best for me.  I simply said I was on vacation and wanted to meet a lot of interesting people and was not on a mission to specifically find a wife.  Also, I wanted to visit many of the historical sites (all true).

Larissa must have figured it out on her own, because she latched onto me and tracked me all over Ukraine.  Like they say, if a FSU woman wants you.... there will be no doubt in your mind.....and you would have trouble escaping even if you wanted to.     ;D

Thanks for that, Mr. Cal.  Quite a goldmine of knowledge there!

I notice "watched" below your avatar.  What is that supposed to mean?

Offline calmissile

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #510 on: January 08, 2014, 11:03:01 PM »
Thanks for that, Mr. Cal.  Quite a goldmine of knowledge there!

I notice "watched" below your avatar.  What is that supposed to mean?

Means I was a bad boy and am on probation for a while.    ;D
Doug (Calmissile)

Offline The Natural

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #511 on: January 09, 2014, 01:49:07 AM »
jazztropy:

I notice "watched" below your avatar.  What is that supposed to mean?

Means I was a bad boy and am on probation for a while.    ;D

It means Larissa is watching him here too  :P

Offline Patagonie

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #512 on: January 09, 2014, 02:03:29 AM »
jazztropy:

I notice "watched" below your avatar.  What is that supposed to mean?

It means Larissa is watching him here too  :P
:ROFL:
"Je glissais through the paper wall, an angel in the hand, s taboy. I lay on the floor, surgi des chants de Maldoror, je mix l'intégrale de mes nuits de crystal, i belong to the festival.

Online northkape

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #513 on: January 09, 2014, 09:36:54 AM »
Cal
Thanks for adding valuable information.....

FT
Amazon = Classical Myth & Legend,, Greek myth, a race of women warriors of Scythia near the Black Sea
They were supposed to be close to 2 meters high and very strong and dangerous women,,
and more of a legend than myth as they did exist, close to the Black Sea (in Ukraine also)
Todays myths, often portrays an "Amazon" as some kind of "ultra sexy, super feminist" (eating men for breakfast)

Amazone = an old French word, meaning among other things: a horseback riding woman, strong enough to ride alone without escort...
In todays world, sometimes used in the meaning of a strong beautiful woman "galleon figure",
And when portraying a more sexy, womanly variant of that 2 meter high woman warrior......... 

A mix of these attributes befits Kirhovorad32 quite good, as she is an excellent horseback rider also......

Here is a typical comic book expression of an amazon,,,
(Kirhovorad32 wouldn't need to feel the slightest bit ashamed, standing next to her either),,,,,, smile



 
« Last Edit: January 09, 2014, 09:44:03 AM by northkape »

Offline ML

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #514 on: January 09, 2014, 05:38:42 PM »
The 'best' women are those who:

* know (without being told) that you are on a WMVM,
* don't ask about it,
* don't care about it as they are confident in themselves and are not afraid of a competition.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline jazztropy

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #515 on: January 09, 2014, 06:41:24 PM »

Here is a typical comic book expression of an amazon,,,
(Kirhovorad32 wouldn't need to feel the slightest bit ashamed, standing next to her either),,,,,, smile



 

Hey, that's wonder woman!

Offline fathertime

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #516 on: January 09, 2014, 08:06:06 PM »


FT
Amazon = Classical Myth & Legend,, Greek myth, a race of women warriors of Scythia near the Black Sea
They were supposed to be close to 2 meters high and very strong and dangerous women,,
and more of a legend than myth as they did exist, close to the Black Sea (in Ukraine also)
Todays myths, often portrays an "Amazon" as some kind of "ultra sexy, super feminist" (eating men for breakfast)

Amazone = an old French word, meaning among other things: a horseback riding woman, strong enough to ride alone without escort...
In todays world, sometimes used in the meaning of a strong beautiful woman "galleon figure",
And when portraying a more sexy, womanly variant of that 2 meter high woman warrior......... 

A mix of these attributes befits Kirhovorad32 quite good, as she is an excellent horseback rider also......

Here is a typical comic book expression of an amazon,,,
(Kirhovorad32 wouldn't need to feel the slightest bit ashamed, standing next to her either),,,,,, smile
 
   Thanks for the clarification of terms and the visual. it sounds like quite an amazone woman you have found! Hopefully things continue to move forward positively,,,,

Fathertime!
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline Daveman

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #517 on: January 09, 2014, 11:10:50 PM »
Gator
Almost no one asked me directly if I were meeting other women at the same time, but several of them were able to twist,
our conversation into a track where I had to admit something like:
"there was one other interesting woman I met with almost a week ago" instead of having to resort to an obvious lie.
I was telling the truth, but only a small and rather innocent part of it.
And the more advanced minds among them, probably filled in the missing pieces themselves, whether smiling or not....

I doubt the less advanced minds missed it either, without any extra pieces.  Pretty much if she knows you are in the country, and not visiting with "her", she will think you are meeting with other women.  Whether any of them steer the conversation that way or not, they know. 
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline JayH

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #518 on: January 09, 2014, 11:15:03 PM »
I doubt the less advanced minds missed it either, without any extra pieces.  Pretty much if she knows you are in the country, and not visiting with "her", she will think you are meeting with other women.  Whether any of them steer the conversation that way or not, they know.
The issue is one of the most important to get clear in your head.One of the biggest hurdles that has to be jumped is for her to know you are serious-both about her and in your search.If a girl knows you plan to see others-it will never be forgotten !!  ;D
SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Offline Patagonie

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #519 on: January 10, 2014, 01:58:58 AM »
The 'best' women are those who:

* know (without being told) that you are on a WMVM,
* don't ask about it,
* don't care about it as they are confident in themselves and are not afraid of a competition.
+2
"Je glissais through the paper wall, an angel in the hand, s taboy. I lay on the floor, surgi des chants de Maldoror, je mix l'intégrale de mes nuits de crystal, i belong to the festival.

Offline Patagonie

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #520 on: January 10, 2014, 02:03:07 AM »
I doubt the less advanced minds missed it either, without any extra pieces.  Pretty much if she knows you are in the country, and not visiting with "her", she will think you are meeting with other women.  Whether any of them steer the conversation that way or not, they know.
+1
"Je glissais through the paper wall, an angel in the hand, s taboy. I lay on the floor, surgi des chants de Maldoror, je mix l'intégrale de mes nuits de crystal, i belong to the festival.

Online northkape

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #521 on: January 10, 2014, 02:40:54 AM »
Meeting more than one....

I agree with ML
Best are those who understands all of it by themselves,, and do exactly the same on their own.

Dave,, I did meet with a few that didn't understand.....
Like I wrote above:

Further out in this trip report is Zap32, that became very sad, when understanding that I had been writing with,
and probably also meeting with other women than her,, after deciding to divorce.
Having no Internet dating experience, when she got started a few months earlier, she had been writing with me only.


FT, I have been very fortunate in finding and building a good relationship with three of Ukraine's very beautiful "amazones"
And now, a few weeks after deciding to go forward with one of them, I feel very good about the possibility of having a future together with her.
Time will tell...... smile

Jay, one thing I always tried to do, was to encourage the woman to write with more men than me,,,,
Telling her that I would feel terrible, if I were to win her heart, because I was the only one participating in the quest.
But this is a man's logic, and it doesn't always resonate equally well with a woman's heart,,, do believe me..... smile
If you are able to get some sympathy for it however, she will be more understanding of the realities in Internet dating.

Pat, you got it....

Having an amazon the last time around,,,  I wanted to show an amazone also.
Unfortunately there aren't too many such drawings floating around the Internet
So I decided to do one my self,,,
Using one of Kirhovorad32's swimsuit photos from last summer, and posterizing it to make it look like a drawing.
For then to squeeze her into the background of the amazon drawing and keeping her hair style.
I'm not an expert at this and didn't want to spend a lot of time...... but here it is.

A true Ukraine amazone


« Last Edit: January 10, 2014, 03:32:03 AM by northkape »

Offline Shadow

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #522 on: January 10, 2014, 07:20:38 AM »
The 'best' women are those who:

* know (without being told) that you are on a WMVM,
* don't ask about it,
* don't care about it as they are confident in themselves and are not afraid of a competition.

The "worst"women are those who:
* are corresponding with and meeting other men while they are corresponding with you
* do not tell you about it
* tell you the other guy they met was better than you.... and he is RUSSIAN.
No it is not a dog. Its really how I look.  ;)

Offline Gator

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #523 on: January 10, 2014, 07:50:14 AM »


A true Ukraine amazone




Interesting!   I wonder whose face was superimposed over Wonder Woman's face.  You did retain the Soviet Red Star.   

Offline Daveman

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #524 on: January 10, 2014, 07:57:13 AM »
Meeting more than one....

I agree with ML
Best are those who understands all of it by themselves,, and do exactly the same on their own.

Dave,, I did meet with a few that didn't understand.....
Like I wrote above:

Further out in this trip report is Zap32, that became very sad, when understanding that I had been writing with,
and probably also meeting with other women than her,, after deciding to divorce.
Having no Internet dating experience, when she got started a few months earlier, she had been writing with me only.




Interesting NK.  Were they aware of your time "in country" before/after your meetings?  If so, that one or more didn't connect the dots would surprise me.  Certainly they may be vulnerable to the same wishful/hopeful thinking process that the men are, but it really is difficult to imagine they'd be clueless with regard to 'women's intuition". 

The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

 

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