Severodonetsk??

[jone]

DC -- I have some very fundamental philosophical disagreements with 2T  --  but not with anything he has posted in 'advice"  to you.

I do not necessarily agree on many points and attitudes 2T espouses -- but that comes down to personal style and different ways to go about  a"search"  and each of us will have all sorts of beliefs and prejudices that others will not share.

In the 2T posts --he mostly is handing out general advice -- and you can take it or leave it -the forum is littered with thread just like this -- and an OP getting upset.
My opinions  on your situation-- are in the threads -- and basically similar or same conclusion as 2T . My situation is current and ongoing and my experience extensive  -- that does not make me always correct -- but it does mean I have a very good idea of likely outcomes.

Hey,

Both Jay and Bill are right on.   They've paid their dues to be able to comment on which side is up and, to my knowledge, have not steered you wrong yet.   

LAMan's thoughts, earlier, whereby he said that you were not necessarily interacting with the woman, even though you had a taped message to you is spot on.    Something like that happened to me early on in my foray into international dating.

The simple fact is that this enterprise costs you time and money.   Those are two most valuable commodities when you are contemplating dating someone 5800 miles away.   You really can't afford to be wrong.

When I started on here I got my nose out of joint because someone with the moniker of Brasscasings burst my bubble on the gal that I thought was mine.   He was very matter of fact about it.   A year later we became good friends and he still teases me about it.

Chillax and know that nothing said on here is personal.   Most of the guys here are really nice and only a few of them intentionally try to make trouble.   But most of us have been down this road and if you get in the groove with the information given out you'll save both of those things I mentioned above:  Time and Money.

In the meantime, know you're among friends, not someone with an ax to grind.

[Jamesukjames]

Totally agree Bill.  I do think that the cowboy was a key board fantasist.  I have also experienced usa and Ukraine hospitality.  So people in dc i have met me for 10 minutes and said don't stay in a hotel stay with us , here are the spare car keys use the car if it's on the drive , here are the keys to my house  help your self to any thing from the fridge but you are going to church with us on Sunday.  Now I'm a big believer in karma so I'm a safe Englishman but many are not .  Now take that attitude to Ukraine and wow you have a miss match.

[DCcowboy]

DC -- I have some very fundamental philosophical disagreements with 2T  --  but not with anything he has posted in 'advice"  to you.

I do not necessarily agree on many points and attitudes 2T espouses -- but that comes down to personal style and different ways to go about  a"search"  and each of us will have all sorts of beliefs and prejudices that others will not share.

In the 2T posts --he mostly is handing out general advice -- and you can take it or leave it -the forum is littered with thread just like this -- and an OP getting upset.
My opinions  on your situation-- are in the threads -- and basically similar or same conclusion as 2T . My situation is current and ongoing and my experience extensive  -- that does not make me always correct -- but it does mean I have a very good idea of likely outcomes.

thank you for the helpful advice

[DCcowboy]

Sorry to all those involved, but seeking a spouse is very personal. I had a few glasses of wine, I am good. I understand you guys have my best interest in mind. I am hitting all of the commandments and will continue to verify she is honest over the he next six months. I know that there is a 99% chance she is a scammer but there is still a 1% chance she is a real person in a bad situation. We will see where this goes.

[Jamesukjames]

So cowboy why are you not using what's app or Viber or Skype to chat with your miss Ukraine.  The Ukrainian I met and the Ukrainian I'm meeting on the 17 th were constantly what's apping me.

[DCcowboy]

[Edit to add] I have a Hot Russian wife so I don't have to F#ck myself.

Bill, Please understand I just want the same thing!

[DCcowboy]

So cowboy why are you not using what's app or Viber or Skype to chat with your miss Ukraine.  The Ukrainian I met and the Ukrainian I'm meeting on the 17 th were constantly what's apping me.

maybe stupid of me but I am investigating. But she says no internet in war zone since 2015. She does not earn enough to pay for it. But I think I might do what boethius suggested, it would be a matter of not having coffee for a week and sending her $50 so trivial expense for me.

[DCcowboy]

DC, most of the male posters here have made the same mistakes.  Bill was scammed, and has the t-shirt to prove it.  His name and photo were posted on a RW forum as a sex tourist, as he'd made the mistake of posting photos of himself with women he met on a WMVM trip.  So harsh as his message is, it is intended as a warning, and to help you, not to knock you down.

The better half is watching Russian news.  He asked me what I was typing.  I explained the last few posts.  His first comment, being from the culture, of the culture, but having rejected that culture, even before I met him, was, "Was she able to sell the flowers?  Probably - 8th of March".  There is a saying there that roughly translates to, "There is nothing to do if there is no money in the till.", which basically means, there's nothing to do with you if you can't be exploited.

If you want to know whether or not this woman is a scammer, go there.  Meet her.  There's a bus from Kharkiv to Severodonetsk every Tuesday, Friday, and Sunday (7.86 euros, but it's a long trip - 7 1/2 hours).  Or, hire a taxi for 2300 to 2600 hryvnia (double that for the foreign rate) for a 3 to 4 hour drive.  Or take a plane (this is from an online search of a Ukrainian airline, 229 hyrvnia one way, but I can't guarantee there actually is a flight, although it does show up online).  Determine if there is any connection between you.  Or send her $50 for a Viber connection and a little spending money.  You will then know, by whether or not she is willing to speak with you online, if she is sincere.

This post was composed with the aid of google in determining cost and availability of transportation.

I always appreciate your posting and perspective tell your spouse thank you

[Jamesukjames]

Cowboy you are being scammed.   Get on f dating site do some real spade work.  May be you will find a nice woman on there who won't rip you off.  Sorry to say you come across as rather vunrable.

[DCcowboy]

Cowboy you are being scammed.   Get on f dating site do some real spade work.  May be you will find a nice woman on there who won't rip you off.  Sorry to say you come across as rather vunrable.

pm me this f dating site. Forgive me if I can't figure it out.

[jone]

I use Elena's www.elenasmodels.com

It is a subscription service so you aren't charged by the letter or by interacting.   Moreover, right away most women will move to Skype (or WhatsApp or Viber).   They will want to communicate with you away from the site.  I never cared for F Dating for the simple reason that it is free. 

I had found a higher quality of women on elena's than FDating.   I guess you get what you pay for.

Good luck.

[SteveInBoston]

maybe stupid of me but I am investigating. But she says no internet in war zone since 2015. She does not earn enough to pay for it. But I think I might do what boethius suggested, it would be a matter of not having coffee for a week and sending her $50 so trivial expense for me.

That is very suspect - no internet/can't pay for it.

Unlimited data plan on vodaphone is only $7/month.  T's internet connection at her apt in Mariupol is $4/week, pay as you go.  She can get free internet at a cafe/restaurant and just order coffee or tea for $1.

[JayH]

it would be a matter of not having coffee for a week and sending her $50 so trivial expense for me.

It has often been discussed  what the real cost of a search is -- and numbers like $200K   are not ridiculous- and for me personally I always considered that there was a real $ cost involved . Sometimes spending a few bucks speculating and accepting that as a cost of getting to a reality is a lot cheaper than getting more involved.
 A few years back  the forum chat room flourished and a lot of info and discussion took place that people did not want to say in an open forum happened  -- and in cases like yours-- many times there was a fast solution .
One time -- a guy came clean that he had already tipped in over $20000  and was preparing to keep doing that.Eventually-he offered enough info for me to identify her . He was shocked( to say the least) that I actually knew her ( yes she was exceptional looking girl  & on the most notorious sites) and even more shocked with what I was able to tell him . Even then-he was only convinced after checking what I told him.
BTW -- he rebounded and 2 years later  married his fsuw dream  -- after being a lot smarter in the process.

Others have reacted to being told what they do not want to hear often enough -- but using that info -- not necessarily in totality -- can only help you.
 The right guy -- has a good chance to succeed . Note- that description is not everyone !

 

[jone]

It has often been discussed  what the real cost of a search is -- and numbers like $200K   are not ridiculous- and for me personally I always considered that there was a real $ cost involved . Sometimes spending a few bucks speculating and accepting that as a cost of getting to a reality is a lot cheaper than getting more involved.
 A few years back  the forum chat room flourished and a lot of info and discussion took place that people did not want to say in an open forum happened  -- and in cases like yours-- many times there was a fast solution .
One time -- a guy came clean that he had already tipped in over $20000  and was preparing to keep doing that.Eventually-he offered enough info for me to identify her . He was shocked( to say the least) that I actually knew her ( yes she was exceptional looking girl  & on the most notorious sites) and even more shocked with what I was able to tell him . Even then-he was only convinced after checking what I told him.
BTW -- he rebounded and 2 years later  married his fsuw dream  -- after being a lot smarter in the process.

Others have reacted to being told what they do not want to hear often enough -- but using that info -- not necessarily in totality -- can only help you.
 The right guy -- has a good chance to succeed . Note- that description is not everyone !

I think it was $25,000 USD.   But who's counting when you're in love?   LOL.

[ML]

So depressing to see guys having so much trouble with a particular gal when the solution is so simple . . . do a WMVM (starting with MANY, MANY) and just drop off any who give you any trouble or concerns.

[Boethius]

That is very suspect - no internet/can't pay for it.

Unlimited data plan on vodaphone is only $7/month.  T's internet connection at her apt in Mariupol is $4/week, pay as you go.  She can get free internet at a cafe/restaurant and just order coffee or tea for $1.

Severodonetsk does have internet, but it’s very slow.  Those prices seem minimal to us, but in some regions of Ukraine, it’s not insignificant.

This post was composed with the aid of google.

[SteveInBoston]

Severodonetsk does have internet, but it’s very slow.  Those prices seem minimal to us, but in some regions of Ukraine, it’s not insignificant.

This post was composed with the aid of google.

Yes, it is not insignificant, but on the other hand it is not unaffordable. 

Provided she is real and sincere about dating internationally, it would be encouraging to see some investment for direct communication from her rather than just a few photos uploaded to a free site (for women) and passively waiting for messages now and then.

[DCcowboy]

Just a update; So I did send money, 55usd, MoneyGram. She did find a Internet connection, she said it was at the translation service she uses. We talked in WhatsApp, short conversation only 5 minutes or so. Video kept freezing, but where able to see each other live. She said 55 was way too much, that it is a quarter of her monthly salary. She actually asked me to send less, if I send money again, 10usd would suffice. I'm assume from history on this thread that I am sure I will get told I am wrong. So have at it. Sorry for the cynicism.

[msmob]

So depressing to see guys having so much trouble with a particular gal when the solution is so simple . . . do a WMVM (starting with MANY, MANY) and just drop off any who give you any trouble or concerns.

Just saw this

Unless you you can remember everything each lass says - DO NOT do it

[DCcowboy]

Yes, it is not insignificant, but on the other hand it is not unaffordable. 

Provided she is real and sincere about dating internationally, it would be encouraging to see some investment for direct communication from her rather than just a few photos uploaded to a free site (for women) and passively waiting for messages now and then.

she has investment, up to now she has paid for the translations.

[Boethius]

Did you tell her to use the money for English lessons?

This post was composed without the aid of google.

[LAman]

she has investment, up to now she has paid for the translations.

"she has paid for translations'

Were you born yesterday? Wait don't tell me, she TOLD you she has paid for translations. Must be so then. (((


Let's see with my math, this girl makes~$16 usd per month, lives on this amount AND pays for translations???

Down the line, I expect her to start asking for money to pay for HER translations too. First she has to get you hooked. I expect that to be within 6 months. Now where did I get that ' 6 month figure'?


So, keep that money flowing......

BTW- I message and video at times with a couple girls in War Zone area. I guess they must be rich!!!

[Boethius]

Over $200 monthly, not $16.

This post was composed without the aid of google.

[ML]

 She said 55 was way too much, that it is a quarter of her monthly salary.

Let's see with my math, this girl makes~$16 usd per month, lives on this amount AND pays for translations???

I have 'alternative' calculations.  Seems she makes about $220 per month.

[Boethius]

BTW- I message and video at times with a couple girls in War Zone area. I guess they must be rich!!!

Depends on the area they live in.  Video is not uniformly good in Ukraine.

My SIL won't video with my husband because of the cost.  They tried a few free sites, didn't work, and she is in Kyiv.  They do text daily.

My husband used to phone her, however, someone stole the metal from the phone line, so phones were out of service for 3 months.  They are probably back now, but they got into the habit of texting.

There was also a car bomb nearby.  Apparently, this is not unusual in Kyiv, when gangs cross each other.

This post was composed without the aid of google.