Financial responibility of a future spouses welfare and social services question

[52topps]

I am under the impression that I bring a woman back to the USA with the intent to get married. I am responsible for all of her welfare and social services if she needs help from the government. I think the limit is $16,000 a year.

#1  IS this only during the time up to the point she becomes a USA citizen?

#2 what happens after she becomes a USA citizen.


Need some input. Thanks

[BillyB]

Welcome to the forum 52topps,

If I remember right, you will have to sign an affidavit of support for 10 years. Based off the divorces I read, no judge ever enforced that many years of support but because you are marrying a person who's first language isn't English, not familiar with this culture, and not very employable, look to pay more in spousal support should there be a divorce. Any divorce can get expensive especially if she gets your Mickey Mantle rookie card from your 52 Topps collection. Test driving a woman isn't wise. Get to know her well before pulling the trigger on marriage.

[52topps]

Well I woukd never again get married without a prenup.

But how long would I be required to cover than 10 years???? Till she becomes a Usa Citizen. Mantle would be in the prenup.

[BillyB]

Well I woukd never again get married without a prenup.

But how long would I be required to cover than 10 years???? Till she becomes a Usa Citizen. Mantle would be in the prenup.

Your prenup should follow state laws. Straying too far from state laws it can be thrown out. Many states allow a person to keep what they acquired prior to marriage. Other states don't care and will split assets such as your Mantle. You will need to hire an attorney for yourself and one for your fiancée. You will also need to hire an interpreter even if she speaks good English. You don't want a prenup thrown out because she said she didn't understand.

I've never heard a guy giving support to his ex wife for even close to 10 years so your prenup shouldn't have language like that in it. You also don't have to support an ex until she becomes a citizen. She can work with a green card and work authorization documents. Disclose your financial situation to an attorney and have him assume your fiancée isn't employable and ask him if he were a judge, what would he do based on a divorce after a marriage lasted X amount of years. You can begin to understand what you must pay in the event of a divorce. Your prenup can be scaled to give her more based off the years married. There are some good threads here discussing prenups.

[52topps]

I will have my lawyer look at it.
I will have it translated into her language and she will have her own lawyer.
I will also have it video taped.
She also needs to review it for at least 10 days, she can't just sign it and be done with in in 10 minutes.

I did find that I am only require to pay these expenses up or until she becomes a USA citizen and has 40 hours into social security, which could take 3 months or 6 months or 9 months depending how part time she is.

I just don't wANT TO PUT MYSELF IN A BAD SITUATION IN WHICH A WOMAN HAS CONTROL OVER MY MONEY.

Will a woman from Ukraine, Russia, or Belarus actually sign these documents or will the snub their noses and walk away?

[alex330]

Will a woman from Ukraine, Russia, or Belarus actually sign these documents or will the snub their noses and walk away?

My wife would have signed. We never went through with it.


I have a feeling most will tell you to take a long walk if they understand the implications. I could be mistaken though.

[52topps]

Before I talk with a future woman about the issue we both should be emotionally attached to each other.  I am going to present it like this. Because of bad women in the USA and since I have been through a divorce once before I have documents with me that would need to be sign if we are going to get married. I will try and become as gentle as possible on this issue.

[BillyB]

I will have it translated into her language and she will have her own lawyer.

If her lawyer's first language isn't the same as hers, you will need an interpreter so she and her lawyer can communicate without error when discussing a translated prenup.

Will a woman from Ukraine, Russia, or Belarus actually sign these documents or will the snub their noses and walk away?

Some members here have said their lady signed a prenup. Some women will consider it a deal breaker. If the language in your prenup follows the state guidelines, it will make most FSU women feel better that they aren't going to get thrown in the streets penniless in the event of a divorce.

[52topps]

I dont want to throw any woman in the streets, ever. Actually she can keep all of her money she makes when she works, and she can save it. I just want to protect my assets and future income and retirement.

[tfcrew]

Will a woman from Ukraine, Russia, or Belarus actually sign these documents or will the snub their noses and walk away?

Civil Court judges have seen many of these prenups. Doesn't matter what country.
Some have been masterful documents too.
However if the judge thinks the lady is getting a raw deal, they will tear that paper up and trash it. Especially a elderly black lady judge.
No, that didn't happen to me.
My wife has everything...and I'm glad..... don't have to worry about it

[alex330]

Tfcrew is correct, there are some judges that will look at these prenups as worthless. And there are some attorneys that specialize in these cases for the women.

Another thought. What happens if she does agree and all goes as planned? You marry, fall in love, begin the process, and when it comes time for 10 year green card they ask for additional information because USCIS believes your marriage may be fraud?

I had to sign over half my home to my wife in order for USCIS to allow us to proceed. My home which in the State of Florida was owned before marriage, so she had no right to. Prenup would have been useless.

On the flip side she have seen women get royally effed over with prenups. They signed, did not put up a fight, and just dealt with it.

[52topps]

Well   I am not trying to find a woman with a child. I will not get involved with a woman who has a child at all! I love kids and have two but I am out of the kid making and raising business and my two are almost out of the nest. So it would be just the woman who doesn't want kids or their kids are older.

I will add into the prenup that she will get airfare back to her home town and some starter money so she isn't penniless. A few thousand dollars in the prenup would help the judge se that she will have a good start here in the USA or back in her home country.

[52topps]

I'm also going to put my home, assets, Roth IRA, savings account, checking account, and items in a trust before I do this. I am protecting everything I own from every woman on the planet to the best of my ability.

[Boethius]

I will add into the prenup that she will get airfare back to her home town and some starter money so she isn't penniless. A few thousand dollars in the prenup would help the judge se that she will have a good start here in the USA or back in her home country.

No court will enforce that.

[HoundDaddyLee]

I'm also going to put my home, assets, Roth IRA, savings account, checking account, and items in a trust before I do this. I am protecting everything I own from every woman on the planet to the best of my ability.

Since it appears you have some deep seeded hate (or distrust) of women. Why are you even looking for a wife? From what you have written on here you seem like a miserable person. Fix that before looking anywhere for a wife. A marriage is supposed to be a partnership between two people. If you do this right and find the right woman you will want to share everything in your life with her. Your are on a path of failure, in my view. You personify the FSUW view of the "greedy man". 


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[fathertime]

I'm also going to put my home, assets, Roth IRA, savings account, checking account, and items in a trust before I do this. I am protecting everything I own from every woman on the planet to the best of my ability.

IF you have a lot to lose, and it makes you more comfortable looking for a woman, it seems to make sense to create a separation of your assets.    Some people would just be too damn nervous that the woman would be seeking to unfairly gouge the wealthier man, by creating a firewall, perhaps you can feel more comfortable and relaxed courting a lady...


Fathertime! 

[2tallbill]

I'm also going to put my home, assets, Roth IRA, savings account, checking account, and items in a trust before I do this. I am protecting everything I own from every woman on the planet to the best of my ability.

This is a quote about housing, but it could have other applications as well.
Rent vs buy, if you have to ask you probably should rent.

In my opinion, you shouldn't get married or seek marriage unless that is what
you really want.

[Slumba]

I'm also going to put my home, assets, Roth IRA, savings account, checking account, and items in a trust before I do this. I am protecting everything I own from every woman on the planet to the best of my ability.

You need to talk to a good lawyer who deals with trusts everyday.

In terms of women taking stuff, don't blame the women - blame the courts.

[pitbull]

I will add into the prenup that she will get airfare back to her home town and some starter money so she isn't penniless. A few thousand dollars in the prenup would help the judge se that she will have a good start here in the USA or back in her home country.

That is okay for a marriage that lasts for a year or so.... For a longer marriage this is clearly not fair to the woman.
If all she gets out of this marriage is what she makes, you should pay for her re-education in the US, and specify that she is not supposed to contribute to the family budget/expenses.

[Larry1]

I'm also going to put my home, assets, Roth IRA, savings account, checking account, and items in a trust before I do this. I am protecting everything I own from every woman on the planet to the best of my ability.

I suggest that you consult an experienced divorce lawyer in your jurisdiction before doing this.

[dragonkid]

That is okay for a marriage that lasts for a year or so.... For a longer marriage this is clearly not fair to the woman.
If all she gets out of this marriage is what she makes, you should pay for her re-education in the US, and specify that she is not supposed to contribute to the family budget/expenses.

Don't ruin their delusion, let the courts rip them a new...... Billionaires have issues with prenups, not sure how a guy that probably has a few mill will beat the system.

In the UK there is literally no protection, trusts cost a few grand to setup, but once i researched it properly, they offer literally no protection either. Russian billionaire, think with a net of 10 billion is in hot water, his wife claimed exile in the UK, and is taking him to court via UK courts.

OP you sound like an uptight guy, i am guessing you are in your 50's from your user. You don't like kids? Majority of women around your age will have kids, if you are thinking of going for women far younger than yourself. Only ones interested will be the ones that will use you as a mule to pay for their school fees, and leave you for being a jaded dick. Seriously, all you can part with is some airline flights? And people call me jewish.... I hope when you said starter money, that you weren't referring to 4 figures settlement lol.

[Boethius]

In terms of women taking stuff, don't blame the women - blame the courts.

Most jurisdictions have legislation in place on division of matrimonial assets.  So, it is not the courts, but elected lawmakers who have determined how assets will be divided.

[52topps]

It's funny that when a man tries to keep his assets safe that he is shamed!! I'm greedy, a loser, deep seeded hate, or that I hate kids and I would make a bad husband. 

Why am I not allowed to protect my assets. I have talked with a lawyer already. A trust will protect my home cars, Roth IRA, 401K and any other asset I add to the trust. The trust will be created soon probably a year before I go on my trip. But the Trust must be created before marriage.

It's actually the court system that does the dirty work for women. This does not mean I am a woman hater because I want to keep my money/hardwork/ years of labor at a job.   If some of you men want to let a woman just take your money and your balls then by all means give them all your money. I will try and protect my assets so if she leaves me I am not living in a van down by the river.

Prenups if done correctly will hold up in court.....in every court on the planet...NO but it will help protect my assets that I have taken 43 years to accumulate.

Most people who get a prenup do things in the wrong order.  You can't get a prenup after you are engaged.  You must have her sign it before you get engaged. Then you ask her. Then she comes to the USA.

My lawyer said a trust will protect my assets if done before I get married. Also the woman will need to sign a document that she is aware of the Trust as part of the prenup.  I am also having my two kids get a Trust set up and signed when they turned 18 which will hold their Roth IRA.

I don't mind sharing money with the woman in my life. I just don't want her to use me as an ATM card and then leave me.
Your right I need to add some stipulations into the prenup that give her more stuff as time moves on in our relationship, like if we are married 15 years, 20, 30 years.  I just don't know how to do that and would like input.

I can have all these safeguards and then leave whoever I want my assets in a Will.

Being protective doesn't make me a bad person. I am loving, caring and raising two kids.

That's like saying using a condom makes me a self centered jerk.

[Boethius]

Your argument would have more merit if you were not contemplating importing a wife.

[52topps]

IT doesn't matter who is to blame.  Your assets can be protected at some level.