Hello

[Katerinka e]

Hi everyone!

My name is Kate and I'm going to tell you a story. It's about me and my ex husband. All started a year ago, when I met him on the internet, I just wanted to talk to people from other countries. Then we started to write to each other and he called me to him. When I arrived, he asked me to marry him. At first it was like a fairy tale, and then he said me that i must work. I get a job as a dishwasher only in Turkish restaurant. He start to drink and did not tell me compliments because of the work I began to look worse than before. Tell me what do I do?

[jone]

Welcome to the forum, Kate.

We are not great at marital counselling here.  But there are some general things to be said.  You should know that every person here has a different opinion. 

Two things stand out: 

1. For better or worse you married this guy.  I wouldn't go back to the point where you decided to get married and claim that you were sold a 'bill of goods'.  That is somewhat counterproductive.  And it is not unusual for both husband and wife to have to work.  I know where I live, very few couples can get along only on one income.

2.  Alcoholism is a disease.  Treat it as one.  I have lost a loved one to alcoholism and know it can destroy any relationship. 

Only you can tell us the truth (as you see it) about your relationship.  We would be happy to know more details.  What country are you in?  If you are in a major metropolitan area, and feel comfortable telling us, what city are you in?  What made you think that your life was a fairy tale? 

We all hope you can find your way back to a wonderful marriage with happiness for both of you.

[Steamer]

My name is Kate and I'm going to tell you a story. It's about me and my ex husband.

If you divorced him then that problem is solved. What specific problems are you talking about?

[Larry1]

Kate,

Welcome to the forum

[BillyB]

Then we started to write to each other and he called me to him. When I arrived, he asked me to marry him. At first it was like a fairy tale, and then he said me that i must work. I get a job as a dishwasher only in Turkish restaurant. He start to drink and did not tell me compliments because of the work I began to look worse than before. Tell me what do I do?

Hi Kate, welcome to the forum. Do you feel that you are his wife or do you feel he married you so that you will work as a slave and give him money?


Many women do work when married. My own wife is going through college and wants a job later. Does your husband work? If not, is he looking for a job or sitting home all day?


Do you live in Turkey or another country? Muslim men can be very controlling of their wives. Did you know this before marriage?


Some marriages can be difficult at first but if both the husband and wife are willing to improve the marriage, problems can be fixed and the marriage will survive. We need to know more information before giving you good advice. Does your husband do anything good that makes you happy?