It appears you have not registered with our community. To register please click here ...

!!

Welcome to Russian Women Discussion - the most informative site for all things related to serious long-term relationships and marriage to a partner from the Former Soviet Union countries!

Please register (it's free!) to gain full access to the many features and benefits of the site. Welcome!

+-

Author Topic: Her Parents  (Read 13440 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Photo Guy

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1884
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: No Selection
  • Status: Committed 0-1 year
  • Trips: 1 - 3
Her Parents
« on: February 08, 2005, 09:06:22 AM »
For those with experience, what has your relationship
been like with her parents, after you married her?
Do you or your wife send them money to help
with their retirement needs? What should I expect?
Can they emigrate here, now that their daughter is here?
Can they easily get a VISA to visit their daughter?
Tell me everything.   -doug L.

Offline Bruno

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3926
  • Gender: Male
Her Parents
« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2005, 10:00:56 AM »
hello Doug...

I cannot reply to all your question because i am not from US....

You write : " For those with experience, what has your relationship been like with her parents, after you married her?"

Before marriage, the mother of my ex-russian wife was in fight with her daughter... During the marriage, it was a great relation with her parents... after the divorce, her parents will not more see her but i am always welcome...

You write : " Do you or your wife send them money to help with their retirement needs? What should I expect?"

Never send money but spend a lot each year during our holidays in Russia... it is custom to have some present for each people you visit... if the family is big, it can become expensive... in my case, i have pay each year the holidays for her parents and his brother... everybody together in one big Daicha... not so much expensive and a lot of fun...

For the two last question, sorry... i know only for Europa

 



 

Offline jb

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 5324
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married > 10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Her Parents
« Reply #2 on: February 08, 2005, 11:23:00 AM »
1.)  My mother-in-law loves me, her dad is deceased.
2.)  Yes, we send a little something home each month.
3.)  Yes, she could move here, but she is scared to death of air travel and flatly refuses to get on an airplane.  If she could come by train, she'd be on the next one headed to Texas.
4.)  Visas for a woman's parents are fairly easy, however you will have to write a letter to the US State Department stating you will be responsible for their welfare while they are in the USA and assuring the Government that they won't overstay the visa.

Offline Admin

  • Administrator
  • *
  • Posts: 8195
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: No Selection
  • Status: No Selection
  • Trips: > 10
Her Parents
« Reply #3 on: February 08, 2005, 05:00:58 PM »
[user=134]Photo Guy[/user] wrote:
Quote
For those with experience, what has your relationship
been like with her parents, after you married her?
Do you or your wife send them money to help
with their retirement needs? What should I expect?
Can they emigrate here, now that their daughter is here?
Can they easily get a VISA to visit their daughter?
Tell me everything.   -doug L.


I have a very nice relationship with my in-laws - both before we were married, and since.

No, we don't send money routinely. My FIL would be insulted if we did.

Yes, the visa is easy to acquire. My MIL has visited us in Denver (she was here for the borth of the baby) and was granted a 5-year multiple entry visa. My FIL does't like the idea of airplanes, so he has not visited as yet.

Emigration is a possibility - but not one we are discussing presently.

Offline KenC

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6000
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: No Selection
  • Status: Married 0-2 years
  • Trips: No Selection
Her Parents
« Reply #4 on: February 08, 2005, 11:01:37 PM »
[user=134]Photo Guy[/user] wrote:
Quote
For those with experience, what has your relationship
been like with her parents, after you married her?
Quote
I have always got along well with Lena's parents.  They seem to like me from the very beginning.  They have only been supportive of Lena's choice (me) even though they are only a few years older than I.
Do you or your wife send them money to help
with their retirement needs?
Quote
Lena's parents are not retired.  We do not send money for support.  Our's is a rather normal relationship, with gifts given and received.
Quote
What should I expect?
Quote
That would depend upon your in-laws circumstances.
Can they emigrate here, now that their daughter is here?
Quote
Only after Lena becomes a citizen
Can they easily get a VISA to visit their daughter?
Quote
Yes.  Lena's Mom had visited us 4 times in 5 years.  Her Dad has been here twice.  It is always a pleasure to have them.
Tell me everything. -doug L.
Quote
Lena's parents have gotten some flak from neighbors and relatives due to Lena living in America.  The perception of some people is that they are now rich because of it.  They have to deal with some jealousy/envy because Lena is in America.
KenC
You are a den of vipers and thieves-Andrew Jackson on banks
Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies-Thomas Jefferson

Offline Muzh

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 6842
  • Country: pr
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Ukraine
  • Status: Married > 10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Her Parents
« Reply #5 on: February 09, 2005, 10:30:10 AM »
[user=134]Photo Guy[/user] wrote:
Quote
For those with experience, what has your relationship
been like with her parents, after you married her?
Do you or your wife send them money to help
with their retirement needs? What should I expect?
Can they emigrate here, now that their daughter is here?
Can they easily get a VISA to visit their daughter?
Tell me everything. -doug L.

 

Well, the way I see it is:

1) Relationship with the outlaws is great.  You should see the hand-carved crib my F-I-L built for his grandson, and then babushka hauling that load to the USA.

2) No we don't.  We do send money once in a whaile, especially for the holidays and birthdays.  They DO NOT expect money from us at all.

3) What should you expect?  If you get a very insensitive young babe, expect to be the International Monetary Fund.  If you find a jewel, then don't expect anything.  You will do it on your own.

4) Yes.

5) Yes, very easily.
To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine - The American Crisis 1776-1783

Offline Jet

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2544
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Married 11/03 Divorced 9/09 Married 6/12
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 3-5 years
  • Trips: None (yet)
Her Parents
« Reply #6 on: February 09, 2005, 09:43:34 PM »
My experience has been pretty much the same as the rest :)

Relationship has been great since engagement. (Papa wasn't too sure about me at first LOL)

Father InLaw would not accept cash donations, but welcomes gifts.

Mother InLaw passed-on unexpectedly this past summer, but Grandmother is with us now and will stay until April. Father InLaw would come, but his job at a military plant is causing some delay in his ability to get an international passport...............neither are considering emmigration at this time.
Every action in company ought to be done with some sign of respect to those that are present. ~ Geo. Washington

Online 2tallbill

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12411
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Living the dream
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Her Parents
« Reply #7 on: October 24, 2020, 07:24:34 AM »
This is a topic that hasn't been raised lately, so I thought I would see if
anybody had any recent comments or questions
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline msmob

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10618
  • Country: ie
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 0-2 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #8 on: October 24, 2020, 07:56:43 AM »
As we get older, this becomes a huge issue.

Not just the money...the health of parents.. You loved one may need to speed a lot of time caring for an elderly parent back in her native land.

Pensions in most  FSU nations suck, even taking into account lower living costs.

Online 2tallbill

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12411
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Living the dream
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #9 on: October 24, 2020, 08:26:40 AM »
As we get older, this becomes a huge issue.

Not just the money...the health of parents.. You loved one may need to speed a lot of time caring for an elderly parent back in her native land.

Pensions in most  FSU nations suck, even taking into account lower living costs.

The inflation rate can also kill any pension as the value of the Ruble/Hrivna/Lari can
drop by rates that have never happened in my lifetime in the West.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline ML

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11661
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Ukraine
  • Status: Married > 10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #10 on: October 24, 2020, 09:38:40 AM »
Wife's parents are fairly self sufficient because of large garden, fruit trees, chickens, etc.
But, over time, they will not be able to care for all of that.
They produce 3-4 times what they need; and then give it away rather than selling in local market.
Wife has asked them to cut back, but they refuse saying if they just sit around, they will die.
She has wanted to spend money to hire helpers, but they refuse that also.
She left fairly significant sum of money with them, but in 10 years or so, they have touched zero of it.
Visiting here in USA is out of the question; they have hardly even ventured to other spots in Ukraine.
Her Mother is a Trump supporter; Father has said little about it.
Mother had a senior supervisory position at a large dairy processing facility and was asked and even pressured to join Communist party, but she refused.
Father gave up supervisory position in building industry when he was pressured to sign documents saying more materials were received than true; the 'missing' materials, of course, went to higher-ups.
As I understand it . . . her parents are the "Mother Teresa's" of their area.
They say every good deed they do for others . . . will come back to them.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline Steamer

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 741
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married > 10 years
  • Trips: 4 - 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #11 on: October 24, 2020, 10:39:46 AM »
I've always gotten along well with her parents however with this Covid thing going on they have been living with us since March. No problems with mother but father has discovered all of my tools in the garage and just LOVES to help. Everything he touches (mechanically) turns to crap but he can't help himself. At first I was very forgiving about this but no amount of "don't, stop, what the hell did you do that for?' slows him down or has any effect. Now I'm ready to choke him out.
« Last Edit: October 24, 2020, 10:43:28 AM by Steamer »
Life ain't nothing but a poker game
And no two hands are quite the same
But I never saw a winner that didn't bet

Offline BillyB

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 16105
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Ukraine
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #12 on: October 24, 2020, 11:11:32 AM »
father has discovered all of my tools in the garage and just LOVES to help. Everything he touches (mechanically) turns to crap but he can't help himself. At first I was very forgiving about this but no amount of "don't, stop, what the hell did you do that for?' slows him down or has any effect. Now I'm ready to choke him out.



That's funny. You have to go behind him and fix everything he fixed. Buy him a car from a wrecking yard and give him a box of tools for Christmas. Give him a project that will keep him so busy, he'll leave you alone.
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Online 2tallbill

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12411
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Living the dream
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #13 on: October 24, 2020, 12:57:04 PM »

That's funny. You have to go behind him and fix everything he fixed. Buy him a car from a wrecking yard and give him a box of tools for Christmas. Give him a project that will keep him so busy, he'll leave you alone.

Buy a car AND a rebuild kit. If he ever gets it back together and running, you buy a
carburetor rebuild kit, then a transmission rebuild kit, then a differential rebuild kit,
then brakes, new lighting harness, wheel bearings, etc.



However, it's doubtful it will ever run again based on his previous trials and
tribulations, so maybe a carb rebuilt kit first might be the answer.

« Last Edit: October 24, 2020, 12:59:02 PM by 2tallbill »
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline Steamer

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 741
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married > 10 years
  • Trips: 4 - 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #14 on: October 24, 2020, 04:46:24 PM »

Buy him a car from a wrecking yard and give him a box of tools for Christmas. Give him a project that will keep him so busy, he'll leave you alone.


That would be like giving a screwdriver and a hammer to a 3 year old and letting him loose in the house.
Life ain't nothing but a poker game
And no two hands are quite the same
But I never saw a winner that didn't bet

Online 2tallbill

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12411
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Living the dream
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #15 on: October 24, 2020, 06:35:16 PM »

That would be like giving a screwdriver and a hammer to a 3 year old and letting him loose in the house.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline msmob

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10618
  • Country: ie
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 0-2 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #16 on: October 26, 2020, 01:04:16 AM »
The inflation rate can also kill any pension as the value of the Ruble/Hrivna/Lari can
drop by rates that have never happened in my lifetime in the West.

Good point, Beel !




Offline japtats

  • Restricted
  • ***
  • Posts: 384
  • Country: 00
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Looking 1-2 years
  • Trips: None (yet)
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #17 on: October 26, 2020, 05:39:39 AM »
Aren't pensions in FSU adjusted for inflation?

Offline msmob

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10618
  • Country: ie
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 0-2 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #18 on: October 26, 2020, 08:25:38 AM »
They have not kept up with double digit inflation and there were mass protests as the govt reneged on a promise not to raise the pension entitlement age.


Offline ML

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 11661
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Ukraine
  • Status: Married > 10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #19 on: October 26, 2020, 10:35:45 AM »
They have not kept up with double digit inflation and there were mass protests as the govt reneged on a promise not to raise the pension entitlement age.

I believe Ukraine is under pressure from World Bank, IMF and various European 'help' groups to raise retirement ages, raise energy prices to free market levels, etc.

These requirements are generally tied to continued funding, but most such countries take the money and then renege on following through.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Online 2tallbill

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12411
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Living the dream
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Her Parents
« Reply #20 on: October 30, 2020, 02:16:30 PM »
I never really answered the question myself.

When I married my Angel Eyes, I knew I was getting a package deal.
I was marrying her and Smiley Girl, plus Momma and Dad.

We don't have a fixed set amount that we send but we send something
most months. Besides she married me AND my family and has the patience
of Job dealing with them.


FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Online 2tallbill

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12411
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Living the dream
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Her Parents
« Reply #21 on: November 05, 2020, 01:22:19 PM »
They have not kept up with double digit inflation and there were mass protests as the govt reneged on a promise not to raise the pension entitlement age.

Welcome back to the forum!

That's true, but they had to raise the retirement age or the whole system
comes tumbling down. In Russia the retirement age was 55.5 for women
that was never going to be sustainable.

Maybe if they had 2008 $166 dollar per gallon oil prices but their economy
is based on oil commodity prices and today it's $39 per barrel.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline msmob

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10618
  • Country: ie
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 0-2 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #22 on: November 05, 2020, 02:49:01 PM »
Welcome back to the forum!

*I* never left ?..

That's true, but they had to raise the retirement age or the whole system
comes tumbling down. In Russia the retirement age was 55.5 for women
that was never going to be sustainable.

EXCUSE ME ?  The same govt has run Russia for 18 years .. THEY were the ones constantly promising "no rise in pension age" - even a pledge in the last 'election' ..

THEN ?  The outgoing PM ( sacrificial - with vineyards in Italy and two super yachts ) announces a volte face during Russia's opening World Cup game .... :popcorn:

Maybe if they had 2008 $166 dollar per gallon oil prices but their economy
is based on oil commodity prices and today it's $39 per barrel.

You CANNOT be listening to the RU state run TV news ... They had the 'national stability fund'...  'No probs for six years at lower oil prices '  ...

All 'expected' the state to use this accumulated wealth in the Covid crisis ....  That hasn't happened, either ..


http://www.chathamhouse.org/2020/06/russian-economic-sovereignty-covid-19-age


Online 2tallbill

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 12411
  • Country: us
  • Gender: Male
  • Living the dream
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
  • Trips: > 10
Her Parents
« Reply #23 on: November 06, 2020, 06:51:12 AM »
*I* never left ?..

You were muted for being a Moby.
I am not going to argue semantics with you.   

EXCUSE ME ?  The same govt has run Russia for 18 years .. THEY were the ones constantly promising "no rise in pension age" - even a pledge in the last 'election' ..

I am not going to defend team Putin for making promises and not keeping them.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline msmob

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 10618
  • Country: ie
  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Russia
  • Status: Married 0-2 years
  • Trips: > 10
Re: Her Parents
« Reply #24 on: November 06, 2020, 07:03:04 AM »
You were muted for being a Moby. 

 :rolleyes:

I am not going to argue semantics with you.   

THAT will be a first, then ...;)   Your 'point' had no bearing to this thread

I am not going to defend team Putin for making promises and not keeping them.

Strange, as that is EXACTLY what you need and WHY I picked you up re the pension age increase ....

 

+-RWD Stats

Members
Total Members: 8883
Latest: Leroy14
New This Month: 1
New This Week: 0
New Today: 0
Stats
Total Posts: 540999
Total Topics: 20849
Most Online Today: 2013
Most Online Ever: 12701
(January 14, 2020, 07:04:55 AM)
Users Online
Members: 11
Guests: 1885
Total: 1896

+-Recent Posts

Re: American With Russian Fiancé - Scheduled For K1 Interview In Warsaw, BUT.... by krimster2
Today at 07:00:25 AM

Re: American With Russian Fiancé - Scheduled For K1 Interview In Warsaw, BUT.... by Brillynt
Today at 06:16:36 AM

Re: American With Russian Fiancé - Scheduled For K1 Interview In Warsaw, BUT.... by krimster2
Yesterday at 09:20:42 PM

Re: American With Russian Fiancé - Scheduled For K1 Interview In Warsaw, BUT.... by Infoman
Yesterday at 09:12:54 PM

Re: American With Russian Fiancé - Scheduled For K1 Interview In Warsaw, BUT.... by krimster2
Yesterday at 09:02:12 PM

American With Russian Fiancé - Scheduled For K1 Interview In Warsaw, BUT.... by Infoman
Yesterday at 08:45:42 PM

Re: What to do by Trenchcoat
Yesterday at 07:59:27 PM

Ukrainian refugee working for me now by ML
Yesterday at 07:04:53 PM

Ukrainian refugee working for me now by ML
Yesterday at 06:59:45 PM

Re: What to do by Trenchcoat
Yesterday at 06:57:42 PM

Powered by EzPortal