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Author Topic: Update - 13 years later  (Read 212960 times)

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Offline Boethius

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #400 on: December 18, 2013, 02:39:44 PM »
WWAMD? (What would a MoBer Do)


Brilliant. 8)
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline LiveFromUkraine

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #401 on: December 18, 2013, 02:40:21 PM »

Since you persist ignoring what is being said to you ad nauseum, I will quote your very own statement and hopefully the familiarity to it will hit home with you and with better clarity.


Which part are you having a problem understanding? 

Offline Boethius

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #402 on: December 18, 2013, 02:40:38 PM »

Dude, you pretty much made the same argument the mob'ers made towards you. 


I'm not seeing that connection.


Care to clarify?
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #403 on: December 18, 2013, 02:44:56 PM »

Which part are you having a problem understanding?

The problem to comprehend is with you. As I stated on the edit above, and likely since you responded while I edited/add to the previous post...I'll say so again here.

...the OP invited anyone to contact his wife. The wife welcomes contact from strangers dealing with her hubby's wife-seeking adventures. Many of the folks expressed acting and abiding within what is already a known context....

Which part of this you DO NOT UNDERSTAND?
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline LiveFromUkraine

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #404 on: December 18, 2013, 02:47:24 PM »
The problem to comprehend is with you. As I stated on the edit above is, and likely since you responded while I edited/add to the previous post...I'll say so again here.

...the OP invited anyone to contact his wife. The wife welcomes contact from strangers dealing with her hubby's wife-seeking adventures. Many of the folks expressed acting and abiding within what is already a known context....

Which part of this you DO NOT UNDERSTAND?


I understand all of it and I have addressed it a few times in responses to you.   Which part of my response is giving you a tough time?

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #405 on: December 18, 2013, 02:48:13 PM »

I understand all of it and I have addressed it a few times in response to you.   Which part of my response if giving you a tough time?


LOL. Oh Okay, then...so you do admit to the fact YOU are the one who is intervening, right?
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline LiveFromUkraine

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #406 on: December 18, 2013, 02:48:57 PM »

LOL. Oh Okay, then...so you do admit to the fact YOU are the one who is intervening, right?


I didn't contact anyone.  So how would I be intervening?

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #407 on: December 18, 2013, 02:53:45 PM »

I didn't contact anyone.  So how would I be intervening?


...and thus I shall rather leave you to yourself to ponder such query on your own...
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline LiveFromUkraine

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #408 on: December 18, 2013, 02:55:01 PM »

...and thus I shall rather leave you to yourself to ponder such query on your own...


lol  I think you took to far of a leap this time.  No need for pondering...  ;D

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #409 on: December 18, 2013, 03:00:04 PM »
Ha-hah! Batman still luvs you, man...  :P
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline LiveFromUkraine

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #410 on: December 18, 2013, 03:02:27 PM »
Ha-hah! Batman still luvs you, man...  :P


Whew, I was worried we wouldn't be blood brothers after this.  heh

Offline fathertime

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #411 on: December 18, 2013, 03:20:39 PM »
Looks like Mies thinks she is the female version of The Godfather now plotting out REVENGE and making people pay for their 'mistakes'...

That is a real mature way to deal with a divorce  ::) ...I think NorthKape and his wife are doing a helluva lot better job than what you would be doing in a similar situation...and all the 'abuse' accusations are just you projecting in your usual man vs woman mentality into a situation that doesn't call for it.

LFU is correct in that the cost of harboring vengeance is just not worth it. Divorcee's are best served to put it behind them and move forward cheerfully. 

Fathertime! 
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Online Faux Pas

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #412 on: December 18, 2013, 03:33:40 PM »
Quote
WWAMD? (What would a MoBer Do)

 :ROFL:

Offline Boethius

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #413 on: December 18, 2013, 03:43:43 PM »
FT, now you are being a tad melodramatic, complete with the 16 point font.


mies stated if someone jeopardized her future and her happiness, she would teach them a lesson.  Nothing about divorce in that statement.
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline fathertime

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #414 on: December 18, 2013, 04:41:30 PM »
FT, now you are being a tad melodramatic, complete with the 16 point font.


mies stated if someone jeopardized her future and her happiness, she would teach them a lesson.  Nothing about divorce in that statement.


You are mistaken…here are 2 of the posts where mies is pretending to be The Godfather:
I see such words as spouse/partner…atonement…trust....husband...  She is talking about spouses divorcing...she may deny that now to cover your misstatement, but I see how it reads and in the context.  I don't see the point you were attempting to make.   This sort of attitude is a terrible attitude to bring into a separationorce.   It sounds to me like Northkape has been handling things a reasonable way, despite SOME of his critics attempting to twist things up .
Insofar as my larger font..I sometimes have problems with my font showing up VERY small after I use an smiley face or use more than one quote box  so I enlarge my post slightly in those cases...it may be unnecessary as I just tried it on this post and had no problem.


Fathertime! 


 
     If a husband "beats the crap" (here, me cursing) out of his wife occasionally, or endangers her health/life/well-being it is irrelevant how generous he is, whether he paid for her college education, and whether he is a good father for their joint child. He is a bad husband, and he is bad for his wife. There are no excuses for such behavior.If a husband regularly and consistently abuses his wife emotionally, it doesn't matter that he helped her to get a degree and is a good father for  their two young children, he is still a bad husband and he is bad for her. (Imho, not a good person too.)In my eyes, what the OP was doing all along throughout the 13 years of his marriage, and what he keeps doing now - constitutes a moral abuse and is inexcusable. Unlike physical violence, this is, also  imho, a forgivable offense, but not and excusable one. If he corrected his behavior and were eager to "walk in his wife's shoes" - I think she would have forgave him and would say "our past mishaps are water under the bridge." But he isn't doing anything like that. On the contrary, i see a specific and consistent pattern in his behavior.Finally, if a person whom I trust wholeheartedly suddenly started behaving unethically, if he or she used his/her close knowledge of me and his/herprivileged access to my life, in order to jeopardize my well-being, my future, my reputation or/and my career, - that would terminate our friendship immediately and I would cut all connections with this person. If the person kept jeopardizing my success and happiness - I would go after this person and won't feel a slightest hint of remorse. I am very kind, gentle, loving, friendly person, but the broken trust has to be atoned for.
But if my close friend (it doesn't matter if this is spouse or just a friend) betrayed me and used my trust to jeopardized my career and my well-being for some unclear selfish motives, - this is how it would make me feel, and this is it how I would proceed. Perhaps you don't see it this way, but for me this is a very serious matter. If the person have done something wrong once and it's over/already a sunk cost - sure, it's cheaper to let it go. If he/she continues to do it, and does it - then reaction is not a revenge, it's the mean to stop bad actions against yourself. 
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline Boethius

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #415 on: December 18, 2013, 05:18:10 PM »
Per the quoted post, mies stated "in order to jeopardize my well-being, my future, my reputation or/and my career, - that would terminate our friendship immediately and I would cut all connections with this person. If the person kept jeopardizing my success and happiness."

It's not about the divorce, or how to handle it.  It is about interfering in future happiness.  Whether or not this is the case in the OP's situation is not relevant to the point made above.
« Last Edit: December 18, 2013, 05:20:18 PM by Boethius »
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline fathertime

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #416 on: December 18, 2013, 05:46:11 PM »
Per the quoted post, mies stated "in order to jeopardize my well-being, my future, my reputation or/and my career, - that would terminate our friendship immediately and I would cut all connections with this person. If the person kept jeopardizing my success and happiness."

It's not about the divorce, or how to handle it.  It is about interfering in future happiness.  Whether or not this is the case in the OP's situation is not relevant to the point made above.


I see the point you are making...but don't agree with it in this case. 


Below, mies has made  a ridiculous accusation, one that is beyond the pale:  Some vicarious 'revenge' for something or another is my educated guess.
    In my eyes, what the OP was doing all along throughout the 13 years of his marriage, and what he keeps doing now - constitutes a moral abuse and is inexcusable. Unlike physical violence, this is, also  imho, a forgivable offense, but not and excusable one. If he corrected his behavior and were eager to "walk in his wife's shoes" - I think she would have forgave him and would say "our past mishaps are water under the bridge." But he isn't doing anything like that. On the contrary, i see a specific and consistent pattern in his behavior.   


If somebody can extrapolate that northkape was abusing his wife for the last 13 years, based on the information we have...then she is apt to make up any old excuse to 'exact revenge', cloaked as self protection of course for justification purposes. 

Just conjure up a few extra facts to insure the woman is being victimized and the man is the abusing villain.   
Fathertime!
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline mies

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #417 on: December 18, 2013, 05:55:17 PM »
Three something else's:

1.  Ask her to remove it.

2.  If someone in management started to ask questions, I would say "That is my crazy wife.  She is upset over my divorcing her and moving here to take this important position working for you.  Much of what he wrote is his wild imagination.  He will soon tire of this."   

3.  If management listens to the above and deems it harmful to my job,I would obtain an injunction (I am not an attorney but this should compel Northkape to cease and desist, remove everything).   If that did not work, sue for malice.   This is not the Wild, Wild West.  We have rule of law.

Exactly.

1) Northkape's wife already had a discussion with him and told him she doesn't want to have info online. He told her she would remove it after he remarries.

3) We do have rule of law. And your proposed actions are in line with what I described. Didn't I say that I would explore and use legal means? I think the word "legal" is quite straightforward.

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #418 on: December 18, 2013, 05:57:32 PM »

I see the point you are making...but don't agree with it in this case. 


Below, mies has made  a ridiculous accusation, one that is beyond the pale:  Some vicarious 'revenge' for something or another is my educated guess.

If somebody can extrapolate that northkape was abusing his wife for the last 13 years, based on the information we have...then she is apt to make up any old excuse to 'exact revenge', cloaked as self protection of course for justification purposes. 


Just conjure up a few extra facts to insure the woman is being victimized and the man is the abusing villain.   
Fathertime!



I agree with Boethius' point. You are being melodramatic. Give it a rest.

Sure 'mies's imagination is fairly robust, as I too, do not believe NK is/was 'abusing, or abused, his wife during their marriage. The fact they shared two lovely children, coupled with the fact she was allowed to pursue her identity and career while married, speaks volume of their relationship to me.

Whatever type of arrangement they agreed to at the present time, with their present situation, rightly or wrongly in anyone else's beliefs or morals; is their own business.

But nowhere in mies' post you quoted denoted any idea or attempt to 'exact revenge' to me. Care to point that out in case I missed it? You mentioned you're making a 'guess' that that's what her intent is. If so, then how are you any better with your equally robust imagination?
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline mies

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #419 on: December 18, 2013, 05:59:22 PM »

Lena married so young that she had never accomplished much in the way of professional achievement or the like.  She would like to know the joy of success so she made the effort to educate herself in a demanding profession.  As it developed, she has much talent and it caught the eye of people with the big interesting  jobs.  She is taking such a position even though it requires her to move. 
Didn't the OP told us early on that Lena was a department head back in Ukraine, in her early 20s, a successful career woman, smart and focused with (don't remember how many people exactly, but more than 2) working under her?. And she already had education back in Ukraine. To me this sounded quite an accomplishment for a young Ukrainian girl. 

Offline fathertime

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #420 on: December 18, 2013, 06:27:23 PM »

Sure 'mies's imagination is fairly robust, as I too, do not believe NK is/was 'abusing, or abused, his wife during their marriage. The fact they shared two lovely children, coupled with the fact she was allowed to pursue her identity and career while married, speaks volume of their relationship to me.

 
 
You are preaching to the choir here regarding NK and mies imagination....and up to now you have tacitly approved of the creative imagination and accusations by not calling it out while calling out less egregious points by others.




But nowhere in mies' post you quoted denoted any idea or attempt to 'exact revenge' to me. Care to point that out in case I missed it? You mentioned you're making a 'guess' that that's what her intent is. If so, then how are you any better with your equally robust imagination?


And show me where did I say that the post I quoted was going to show mies was exacting revenge?   Show me where I said I was any better than mies?  I’m using my imagination and filling in the blanks just the same as she has been doing to NK…If it is ok for one and nobody wants to hold her to account..then I figured it was ok for others.  As you well know, you do it all the time too. 




  Give it a rest.
 
You want to argue points…no problem…As far as you telling me to give it a rest…hahah… forgettaboutit …you are not my leader or boss of the website….you need to be clear on that point,  and we will argue respectfully if that becomes necessary...I'd wager that several posters don't feel enough has been said. 
Fathertime!





I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #421 on: December 18, 2013, 06:57:37 PM »
 
You are preaching to the choir here regarding NK and mies imagination....and up to now you have tacitly approved of the creative imagination and accusations by not calling it out while calling out less egregious points by others....

Since when do others need to move on YOUR cue? Now the brown nose brigade maybe marching to your tune soon as they wake up from their nap, but never moi.

Different generation, man.

Quote
...And show me where did I say that the post I quoted was going to show mies was exacting revenge?

Is implication enough with you?

Quote from: fathertime
...Below, mies has made  a ridiculous accusation, one that is beyond the pale:  Some vicarious 'revenge' for something or another is my educated guess....


Surely, based on how you wrote that, didn't imply you mean anyone else other than the handle quoted within.


Quote
...Show me where I said I was any better than mies?...


Ahhh! It's one of those 'show me' fart fest, LOL. OK, well show me where I said 'you said you were better than mies. chrissakes!


Quote
.... I’m using my imagination and filling in the blanks just the same as she has been doing to NK…If it is ok for one and nobody wants to hold her to account..then I figured it was ok for others....

Ahh, so I was right with my post to you. You're not absolved to the accusatory tendencies you're sticking upon mies, too then.

Then why the heck are you even trying to further argue any other the 'point'? Must be the Howdy-doody time is over and the ol' pot-kettle love fest revival is in the offering?


Quote
.... As you well know, you do it all the time too....


No I don't. Elaborate please.

Quote
...You want to argue points…no problem…As far as you telling me to give it a rest…hahah… forgettaboutit …you are not my leader or boss of the website….you need to be clear on that point,  and we will argue respectfully if that becomes necessary...I'd wager that several posters don't feel enough has been said....

Oh I was VERY clear. So clear in fact you already admitted fault from my initial statement to you. Must I re-quote?

As for the rest of your silly remarks shown above, CLEARLY tells me you have neither the clue nor the direction to your silly diatribe other than to portray yourself as someone of significance. You ain't. Besides, based on your riposte, it tells me you haven't the ware to even argue with yourself much less with anyone else. Especially The Batman.

Not today. But keep trying. 
« Last Edit: December 18, 2013, 07:01:40 PM by GQBlues »
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline fathertime

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #422 on: December 18, 2013, 07:04:32 PM »
Since when do others need to move on YOUR cue? Now the brown nose brigae maybe marhcing to your tune soon, but never moi. Different generation, man.

Is implication enough with you?


Surely, based on how you wrote that, didn't imply you mean anyone else other than the handle quoted within.



Ahhh! It's one of those 'show me' fart fest, LOL. OK, well show me where I said 'you said you were better than mies. chrissakes!


Ahh, so I was right with my post to you. Then why the heck even try to argue the 'point'? Must be the Howdy-doody time is over and the ol' pot-kettle love fest revival is in the offering.

 

No I don't. Elaborate please.

Oh I was VERY clear. So clear in fact you already admitted fault from my initial statement to you. Must I re-quote?

As for the rest of your silly remarks shown above, CLEARLY tells me you have neither the clue nor the direction to your silly diatribe other than to portray yourself as someone of significance. You ain't. Besides, based on your riposte, it tells me you haven't the ware to even argue with yourself.

Not today. But keep trying. 
Fathertime!


haha, it is nice to see I got the site fool to try a 'point by point' that didn't show a thing!  I figured your emotional immaturity would dictate a response but at least I thought it would make sense..
and YOU actually thought you were somebody important...  :D


Fathertime!
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #423 on: December 18, 2013, 07:05:46 PM »

haha, it is nice to see I got the site fool to try a 'point by point' that didn't show a thing!  I figured your emotional immaturity would dictate a response but at least I thought it would make sense..
and YOU actually thought you were somebody important...  :D


Fathertime!

touche! My point proven. Now go change your diapers.
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline LiveFromUkraine

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Re: Update - 13 years later
« Reply #424 on: December 18, 2013, 07:08:27 PM »
Man, I almost missed all the fun!

 

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