жертвовать

[Vaughn]

Could anyone explain to me in English how the word
жертвовать applies to a marriage or relationship ? I'm
guessing it has to do with personal sacrifice.

[Lily]

Correct.

[Vaughn]

Thank you, Lily. It was my best guess given the context.

[Ooooops]

"I gave up everything for you, you ungrateful bastard!"  or  "We all sacrifice something, but that the way relationships work" or …?

[Елена]

Russian mentality in women is very common. Russian women often preserve  family, even if the husband is drinking or cheating on her . Russian women pay a lot of time tasks at home when they come after work . Moreover, many men do not participate in or contribute very little to the education of children and the household. Russian woman has two jobs . First, it operates eight o'clock in the company and working from home for 8 hours. Also, if a woman has a small child , it is very difficult to get a job here strong discrimination , labor, women are often paid less than the work of men. So very often, women make sacrifices for the sake of the family.

[lordtiberius]

Russian mentality in women is very common. Russian women often preserve  family, even if the husband is drinking or cheating on her . Russian women pay a lot of time tasks at home when they come after work . Moreover, many men do not participate in or contribute very little to the education of children and the household. Russian woman has two jobs . First, it operates eight o'clock in the company and working from home for 8 hours. Also, if a woman has a small child , it is very difficult to get a job here strong discrimination , labor, women are often paid less than the work of men. So very often, women make sacrifices for the sake of the family.

 

We should have a thank you button

[Ludmila]

Lt, examples of usage:
 How many $ should a 57 y.o. bridegroom  жертвoвать to find a 30 y.o lady to be his wife till she gets her Green Card?
 
A young lady is ready to жертвoвать 2 years of her priceless young life when she is staying with an old AM in order to get her Green Card.
 
What do Americans жертвуют when they give donnations to their churches and then write the value off the taxes? Is it a жертва? Аmericans think it is. Russians think it isn't a жертва. ay be because they see things as "black or white" ( quoting a forum member)?
:-)  :-)  :-)

[Елена]

Older people do not have enough. If a man marries a woman 20-30 years younger than himself, he should think about why she married him. And he should realize that he is old in odinocheschtve well, or with their new friends. And if a man 50-60 years old has no brains and wisdom that would understand it. And there are only ego-he is guilty of his own stupidity. And someone said that Russian women dream to meet a foreigner 15-30 years older than themselves, it is not.

[Misha]

30 y.o lady to be his wife till she gets her Green Card?
 
her priceless young life

It is an interesting theme that keeps coming up, the idea that the years when were are in our twenties is somehow priceless. Though, would that not imply that some years are worthless? When would the cutoff be between priceless and worthless?

[Faux Pas]

It is an interesting theme that keeps coming up, the idea that the years when were are in our twenties is somehow priceless. Though, would that not imply that some years are worthless? When would the cutoff be between priceless and worthless?

I agree. I am in my 50's and I find my 50's much more important and priceless than anybody Else's 20's, 30's or 40's 

[Ludmila]

The difference is that  the lady's biologically active AGE ( AND CONSEQUENCES FOR THE SYSTEM OF HER BODY) is much shorter than that of a man. So simple.
It looks, you haven't ever thought about it. Meanwhile, a lady  never forgets about it ( that her biological little clock is ticking, and that she'd better be done with everything that she's supposed to do by virtue of laws of nature sooner than later ).

[Misha]

The difference is that  the lady's biologically active AGE ( AND CONSEQUENCES FOR THE SYSTEM OF HER BODY) is much shorter than that of a man. So simple.
It looks, you haven't ever thought about it. Meanwhile, a lady  never forgets about it ( that her biological little clock is ticking, and that she'd better be done with everything that she's supposed to do by virtue of laws of nature sooner than later ).

So when is your cutoff? 20? 25? 30? 35?

[Faux Pas]

The difference is that  the lady's biologically active AGE ( AND CONSEQUENCES FOR THE SYSTEM OF HER BODY) is much shorter than that of a man. So simple.
It looks, you haven't ever thought about it. Meanwhile, a lady  never forgets about it ( that her biological little clock is ticking, and that she'd better be done with everything that she's supposed to do by virtue of laws of nature sooner than later ).

So, this is the same for all ladies? One size does not fit all in this regard. While in my 20's, my 20's were much more important to me than whatever anyone else's were to them. When I reached my 30's, same thing. To imply that a lady's 20's are more important than my 50's will never gain favor with whomever the disparaged are. They won't agree.

A women in her 20's should make whatever decisions are best for her. If it is marrying a man in his 40's or 50's and that is the best decision for her, no one else to to blame for her decision. If someone else made that decision for her then, they can should whatever responsibility there is for it. Personal responsibility is paramount here IMO

[Misha]

I agree with FP. Sure life is not fair, and we don't all have the choices we would want, but we still have options.

[Ludmila]

Qu :"So, this is the same for all ladies?"
---Laws of nature are the same for all humans ( there are exceptions ). In America liberals think that laws of nature can be changed. Oh, well.
 
Qu :"While in my 20's, my 20's were much more important to me than whatever anyone else's were to them. When I reached my 30's, same thing."
 
--We're talking about women's biological system and the behaviorial consequences.  YOU, FP, don't have anything to do with women, I suppose.
 

[pokerintherear]

I have noticed that as a Russian Woman approaches 50 she starts to look much older.

American Man must chose a woman 10 years younger to look like a match when he is 60 and the woman is 50

[Faux Pas]

Qu :"While in my 20's, my 20's were much more important to me than whatever anyone else's were to them. When I reached my 30's, same thing.

That was a statement, not a question
 

--We're talking about women's biological system and the behaviorial consequences.  YOU, FP, don't have anything to do with women, I suppose.

I am going to assume you are discussing her reproduction biological clock? What exactly is the difference in her reproduction clock married to an older foreigner as opposed to a younger RM? I propose not one single thing. Her ability to reproduce has not been affected. pitbull's argument from the other thread holds no water either. The women isn't anymore "devalued" as a result of a divorce from an older man anymore than she is divorced from a younger man.

Renetka, it seems you attempting to debate this point actually strengthens my position and weakens yours. Let me guess, you are a woman in her 20's or 30's, divorced from an older man? This proves my point in that because you are that woman, it is the most important to you. Just as me being in my 50's makes "me" and my 50's much more valuable to me than "you" in your 30's.

The years I, theoretically, spent in a marriage that ended in a divorce was just as valuable to me as the same years were as valuable to the much younger wife I divorced. Make sense? 

[Ranetka]

That was a statement, not a question
 
I am going to assume you are discussing her reproduction biological clock? What exactly is the difference in her reproduction clock married to an older foreigner as opposed to a younger RM? I propose not one single thing. Her ability to reproduce has not been affected. pitbull's argument from the other thread holds no water either. The women isn't anymore "devalued" as a result of a divorce from an older man anymore than she is divorced from a younger man.

Renetka, it seems you attempting to debate this point actually strengthens my position and weakens yours. Let me guess, you are a woman in her 20's or 30's, divorced from an older man? This proves my point in that because you are that woman, it is the most important to you. Just as me being in my 50's makes "me" and my 50's much more valuable to me than "you" in your 30's.

The years I, theoretically, spent in a marriage that ended in a divorce was just as valuable to me as the same years were as valuable to the much younger wife I divorced. Make sense? 

.


Oh i do  not disagree with you at all. I do not think someone can say their years are more valuable then others peoples.

I agree though that for a woman her 20s are very important and its a shame to have it wasted. Plus i had made other points.

[Misha]

I agree though that for a woman her 20s are very important and its a shame to have it wasted. Plus i had made other points.

Sure, but a woman's eggs do not self-destruct on her 30th birthday. It is possible for a woman in her early thirties to have a child and even in her later thirties.

[Ranetka]

Sure, but a woman's eggs do not self-destruct on her 30th birthday. It is possible for a woman in her early thirties to have a child and even in her later thirties.

Its a bit more than that i think. Its the whole social/flirt/enjoying your beauty/being carefree thing. When a woman marries a boy her age it does not stop -  young people social dynamics is different to those in middle age. When 20 yo marries a middle age man she gives it up.

[Misha]

Its a bit more than that i think. Its the whole social/flirt/enjoying your beauty/being carefree thing. When a woman marries a boy her age it does not stop -  young people social dynamics is different to those in middle age. When 20 yo marries a middle age man she gives it up.

Yes, but it is still her choice to make. If it was an arranged marriage where she had no say in the matter, then I might think otherwise, but women in Russia and the FSU are free to say no to getting married.

[Ranetka]

Yes, but it is still her choice and her choice to make. If it was an arranged marriage where she had no say in the matter, then I might think otherwise, but women in Russia and the FSU are free to say no to getting married.

Well of course, we are going in circles, i can see my answers are not satisfying to you but they're make prffect sence to me, they will to you too when your daughter has grown up a bit

[Faux Pas]

.


Oh i do  not disagree with you at all. I do not think someone can say their years are more valuable then others peoples.

I agree though that for a woman her 20s are very important and its a shame to have it wasted. Plus i had made other points.

You made good points but, I do not follow how those years are wasted? Even with the different dynamics of socializing in the 20's versus middle age. Older men with younger women have been hooking up since we all lived in caves. This day in age, a younger woman makes a choice to marry an older man, she also made a choice "her" choice to live in two different dynamics rather than just the one. Doesn't she?

[Misha]

Well of course, we are going in circles, i can see my answers are not satisfying to you but they're make prffect sence to me, they will to you too when your daughter has grown up a bit

Perhaps, but if we have raised her right, then I will know that it is futile for me to try to impose what I believe will be "best" for her if that is not what she wants. When she is 21, I am certain, that she will be perfectly capable of making rational decisions and living with the consequences. If she isn't, then we will have truly failed as parents.

[Ludmila]

Qu :" Sure, but a woman's eggs do not self-destruct on her 30th birthday. It is possible for a woman in her early thirties to have a child and even in her later thirties".
 
Misha, the term  "successful" for a lady means that by the age of 30 she's graduated with degrees,  already has a kid and can dedicated herself to professional growth and career.
 
Although -- quoting you-- "woman's eggs do not self destruct", giving birth to kids after 30 is a challenge and tosses her VERY FAR back in her career . Coupled with lack of support group in her environment, it may have irreversible impact on the final result, the final result ( ideally) being a package : family, good education, growing kids, career growth).
 
I'm not talking of those ladies ( albeite nice and good natured) whose bar is comparatively low.