Bookend for the IDing these Ladies thread

[Daveman]

I'd like to ask americans...is it possible in USA to say " hey, you look like a fat pig (swine),HA HA HA!!! ? I have an impression that a rudeness is normal in USA.
In the UK nobody can say similar about anybody. It is rule there.
Maybe I am wrong.
 

Well, normal is a matter of perspective. It's "Normal" for my father to do this, in relation to HIS normality, but not really normal for NORMAL people. 

He's deaf, but that only defends the volume.  It's not just with fat people...  I can't count the times I've been inundated with stares from people when he starts looking around a restaurant or something and starts with..

"DAMN... That woman is a big as a house..."
"Where did all the MEXICANS come from?"

etc etc etc...  makes life interesting for sure.  Too bad old age doesn't come with a volume knob.

Dave

[ScottinCrimea]

I remember when I lived in South America they wre quite direct with their comments. They would say, "Boy, you are fat". or "Wow, where is your makeup?"  and no one took offense.  The point is that we shouldn't force our cultural norms on others and not take offense so easily.  If someone makes such a comment, it is most likely not an attempt to offend.  That's one thing I had to learn living in Ukraine.  People would say things that at first glance were offensive but after clarification were not intended as such.  What I learned was to GIVE THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT until proven otherwise.

[BC]

Guys and Gals,

Gator posted the pic in jest, received some negative feedback and humbly apologized to the ladies mentioned.

It should have stopped with that..

but instead, goes on and on and on.. a fire fed by nothing more than negativity towards others.

We've often heard the words 'Don't feed the trolls!'.. -and I am not calling anyone here a troll.... -but does this thread not involve the same principle? 

Ask yourselves (both men and women) what's the point of continuing this debate?.. Is there hope of anything positive resulting from it?

I for one think not -and that we all probably have better things to do..  Over the last days I have seen other threads ignored that would certainly benefit with even a small part of the useless effort expended here.

[ScottinCrimea]

It should have ended with the words, "Okay guys, something to think about in the future." and been closed.

[SANDRO43]

Sandro, THAT is the point I am trying to make here. Why should we (AM)change the way we choose to communicate with each other in order to accomodate the AD hags?

KenC, my point is that if we know what a member or members are sensitive about, then we cannot expect them to react with a hearty laugh and a witty rejoinder when we touch their sensitivities, regardless of whether those might appear excessive or not.

Consider a purely theoretical example: suppose I had found that beautiful painting and thought it might have been funny to post it with some oblique reference to an RWD member married to a much younger woman, or worse still mentioned your name and Lena's, just to get a few laughs from the community. Not a particularly brilliant idea, I think you'll agree. If only partially uncertain on what your reaction to that would have been, good-natured or deeply offended, it would have been silly to proceed with the idea.  

Just a matter of common sense and courtesy. Gator made a bad call and apologised, Daveman felt compelled to do additional damage control for the American contingent (already under heavy attack ), and I don't think many here feel like being overly obsequious to AD passers-by. Just my opinion.

And yes, this particular horse is becoming rather smelly .