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Author Topic: Weeding our fake profiles  (Read 9318 times)

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Offline msmob

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #25 on: June 06, 2020, 03:01:27 AM »
Some advice from someone who did not participate in searching for 15 years,  note that everything I mention may be outdated1. Women might contact you if they think you are a good catch, but in general expect you to do the work. They make themselves available, it is up to you to make use of that.While it is possible for women to contact you, be careful on a site where you pay per contact, it might just be the agency wanting you to spend cash and women will disappear once no more cash is to be made.2. Be prepared. That means have things like Skype and Whatssapp, Viber and other thingsat hand to exchange. Every woman of legal age (and below) has a mobile phone.3. Know when you can travel.  Yes you really will need to travel and meet the woman. While booking tickets on forehand is not to be advised, you might be sure your passport is up to date, you know who will take care of your kid for short time and when you might travel.4. Russian is not more complicated than German. It has more or less the same number of tenses, and while more Latin than Germanic the spoken language is phonetic. Al you need is to learn the aphabet to get basic understanding.5. This will cost time and money. Know what you can spend and if you can support your future family.

Please note I know RU ladies who DO have mob phones but 'smart' they aint ..so there'd be no SKYPE, WhatsApp , etc. though they are few and far between and not in the market for a western guy ))

I'd say ( 6 years out of date dating advice, here ) that this is sound advice.


Having studied, FR, Latin, Greek, German and Russian ... I found RU the hardest ..but I'm getting older..

Don't worry about the grammar ..just concentrate on Vocab is MY advice.. and 'his' ..







« Last Edit: June 06, 2020, 03:04:21 AM by msmob »

Offline Shadow

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #26 on: June 06, 2020, 03:04:21 AM »
Please note I know RU ladies who DO have mob phones but 'smart' they aint ..so there'd be no SKYPE, WhatsApp , etc. though they are few and far between and not in the market for a western guy ))

I'd say ( 6 years out of date dating advice, here ) that this is sound advice.
If my MIL at 78 years of age can figure out Whattsapp calling I doubt any younger woman can not  ;D
No it is not a dog. Its really how I look.  ;)

Offline msmob

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #27 on: June 06, 2020, 03:05:30 AM »
If my MIL at 78 years of age can figure out Whattsapp calling I doubt any younger woman can not  ;D

I will inform Sveta's older friends to invest in a smartphone

Offline redking11

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #28 on: June 06, 2020, 04:57:11 AM »
Russian has 6 cases. German has 4 and there isn't a website out there that doesn't list it as more difficult. Everything else sounded like solid advice.

Offline rwd123

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #29 on: June 06, 2020, 08:07:27 AM »
There are no hard and fast rules - but no substitute for experience. I've had a mix of short and long-term relationships with FSUW over the past 20 years; lived in the FSU, spent a lot of time there in 2018 but due to two cancelled trips in the last six months not a lot of recent experience. I travel more for business and personal reasons, not for dating. Not actively pursuing because I'm busy and the borders are closed. I sometimes help n00bs in Moscow airports too, LOL.  :P

FSUW will have cultural differences, but you'll meet a mix of the good, the bad, and the ugly if you date enough of them. As 2tallbill always says - try and find a good girl. The unmarried ones who are 30+ are as rare as hen's teeth (same goes for men); the so-so girls are time wasters.

Given your situation (37yo, divorced, daughter, wants more kids, professional, mid-level salary with potential for high salary, tall, overweight, average looks, no language skills, likely to want a prenup) my two cents...

Focus on women aged 30-35 (no younger than 28). You'll get more interest from women who are already mothers. Younger women will drain your time, will seriously suck your time and it is the most important thing you have (other than your daughter).

Ukraine is more troublesome than Russia so I'd not necessarily avoid Ukraine altogether but it wouldn't be a bad choice for you. Read the trip reports of the “beard” and ukjames… out of their depth. No shame in that but learn from their stories. Pat’s Operation White Panther thread will give further insights, but he is waaay more experienced to deal with Ukrainian women. The further away from major cities and further away from Europe, the less English speakers. If you speak conversational Russian, you’ll easily expand your dating pool five-fold.

Things have shifted towards dating apps. Badoo and Tinder are widely used. Many or most women on these apps may not be interested in foreigners, but some are. Fakes and working girls should be easy to spot. Pro-daters probably won't be a concern for you while the borders are closed because they know you cannot be fleeced. They'll probably just ignore you for now. The only paid site I'd consider is Elena's Models. Not to say you can't meet a future wife on another site, but I had by far the most interaction on EM. Avoid Russian Cupid; Ukraine Date is worse. Mamba? LOL, no.

Be prepared to crash and burn on the first trip, or even the first few, because there are cultural differences that you simply won't "get" without experience. Once you're on the big bucks you can hire me as an on-the-ground consultant, LOL.

Don't become infatuated with a photo. IMO 80% of women look worse (some much worse), 10% look about the same, and 10% look better. Finally, don't think with your dick. It has to be said. Use your head, the big one!

Offline msmob

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #30 on: June 06, 2020, 08:23:03 AM »
The unmarried ones who are 30+ are as rare as hen's teeth

Do you mean 'good girls' in this age-group ?

Unless there's been a dating revolution in just over half a decade, I strongly disagree that they are 'rare as hen's teeth'.   

Gold nuggets are rarely to be found easily without digging and getting one's hands dirty ;)

Most folks don't consider Siberia and Southern Russia ...   

Offline ML

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #31 on: June 06, 2020, 09:03:30 AM »
Regarding pre-nups , there are a couple of very long threads on  that topic somewhere here.
Others who are better at this than me . . . please find and post for this guy.

Myself, I was a big promoter of pre-nups, while many others were against.

Another thread here asked guys to fill in the questionnaire regarding yearly income and another for total net worth.

Results indicated a VAST spread of yearly income levels and net worth . . . thus explaining the two opposite opinions regarding pre-nups . . . and the often extremely judgemental wording used by those with little to lose.   So be ready for the 'holier than thou' group.

Then, interestingly (or not), I did not have a pre-nup when I married my FSU gal back in 2014.  My situation was much different from yours, and was reasoned something like:  I was advancing in age, I had lived a very full life, traveled the world, experienced many, many things and sights, spent quality time with dozens of women, had provided quite a bit for my two adult children and left generous trust funds for future grandchildren, had zero debts, and could live comfortably off only Social Security if it came down to that.

A few months after our marriage, some news show was talking about pre-nups and wife said to me:  "Why didn't you want me to sign such, I would have?"
I just replied something like:  "I didn't feel it was necessary" . . . and never commented further.

Now, back to your current question and your current situation regarding pre-nups:

First, It will be a hard situation for you.  It will raise many, many concerns for the women, even among two groups of women.  Some will understand them and some (the FSU gals) will be baffled by the idea.
It will not go over good with any of them.

Second, you have a serious misconception about the basics of pre-nups.
They WILL NOT protect you against having to pay huge or small alimony to ex-wives.

Pre-nups are mostly to protect each party regarding their existing owned assets prior to marriage.
I gather that, for you, this is a relatively small number at this point.

Third, judges often ignore pre-ups partially or in totality anyway . . . particularly for foreign wives, even if such wife employs a separate attorney speaking in her native language.

- - - - - -

On a separate issue, and that I have raised before . . .

I think, given your future situation, you are foolish to be even considering looking abroad for a wife.
Those of us who have done so are losers in some respect with regard to being able to find the mate they desire in the home country.  In my case, it was the age gap I needed for an enthusiastic sex partner.  (I actually curse my continued sex drive).

In 3 years, or sooner, you CAN attract a 9-10 gal right here in USA, and she might even likely be a doctor or another highly paid professional.  A high number of MDs even seem to be married to nurses.  I have been in and out of hospitals quite a bit the last 2 years and there are a number of fairly stunning looking nurses  walking about.

Sure, the pickings might be slim in your current location . . . so put some effort into looking at larger cities in Texas or where ever.  Do some networking . . . make some trips to visit with fellow MDs in those places, go to cocktail parties, go to whatever events are occurring for medical people, etc.

Looking for a foreign wife is a royal PIA and takes much, much time.  Time which you, as a growing professional, do really not have and should not devote any time to.  If you do so, your career will suffer.

Again, those of us who have done it, did so out of necessity.   You do not have the limitations we had.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline msmob

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #32 on: June 06, 2020, 10:04:17 AM »


Looking for a foreign wife is a royal PIA and takes much, much time.  Time which you, as a growing professional, do really not have and should not devote any time to.  If you do so, your career will suffer.

Again, those of us who have done it, did so out of necessity.   You do not have the limitations we had.

WHAAAT ? ..

 'Necessity' ?

You've lost me here, ML




Offline ML

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #33 on: June 06, 2020, 10:32:12 AM »
Those of us who have searched for, found, and married a foreign born wife living in a economically disadvantaged country have done so out of necessity.

We could not find and keep a woman of similar qualities and criteria in our home countries.

We can deny this . . . but it doesn't change the truth of it.

The OP should not go this route because (in his situation, particularly in 3 years) he can search for, find, and keep a woman meeting his criteria right here in USA.

Any 36 year old decent looking guy about to make a quarter of a million a year or more would be highly foolish to look for a foreign wife when he could really find the gal of his dreams right here in USA.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #34 on: June 06, 2020, 10:34:13 AM »
Do you mean 'good girls' in this age-group ?

I read it to mean "never married" gals in that age group.
Certainly there are good girls in that group.






FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline Davo

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #35 on: June 06, 2020, 10:43:47 AM »
I sometimes help n00bs in Moscow airports too, LOL.  :P

Lol, I still think of that day often.... what are the chances that you sit near and strike up a conversation with one random person in the airport that day and it’s a fellow member!!

Offline msmob

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #36 on: June 06, 2020, 10:50:15 AM »
:O

Online 2tallbill

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Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #37 on: June 06, 2020, 11:00:57 AM »
Those of us who have searched for, found, and married a foreign born wife
living in a economically disadvantaged country have done so out of necessity.

Necessity and supply and demand.

Back in 2014 how many unmarried women were there in Rural North Dakota?
It was less than zero. The entire population of unmarried women were
either younger than 18 or older than 80. All the rest were taken.

It took me 24 hours to drive from Rural North Dakota to Portland Oregon.
It took me 20 hours door to door to get from Rural North Dakota to
Voronezh Russia. I went to Russia because it was closer!!

In Norf Dekody they had zero wimmin even the toothless crones were
taken. In Russia they have countless hot unmarried women who were
late 30's and early 40's. They had countless women with University
degrees, with small buts, immaculate nails, beautiful eyes, long legs
and long hair.

IT WAS A NO BRAINER!!! 


« Last Edit: June 06, 2020, 11:13:14 AM by 2tallbill »
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline ML

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #38 on: June 06, 2020, 01:16:34 PM »
Those of us who have searched for, found, and married a foreign born wife living in a economically disadvantaged country have done so out of necessity.

Let me provide two addendums:

1) Three of the guys here (out of the dozens who will claim) did not do so out of necessity.

2) Finding a mate in an economically disadvantaged country does not mean you are taking advantage of the gal.  You are both getting what you want.

For example, many of us (my wife certainly) go to plant shops later in the season and even at the end of the season to buy items discounted 50-90%.  This is to our economic advantage, but doesn't mean we are taking advantage of the seller.  The sellers know they will get zero for the items at some point.  So both buyers and sellers are getting something of value.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline redking11

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #39 on: June 06, 2020, 03:52:19 PM »

The OP should not go this route because (in his situation, particularly in 3 years) he can search for, find, and keep a woman meeting his criteria right here in USA.

Any 36 year old decent looking guy about to make a quarter of a million a year or more would be highly foolish to look for a foreign wife when he could really find the gal of his dreams right here in USA.

The real value in this thread has been in forcing me to think about what I want in a woman, why I am looking to the FSU, & really forcing me to ask myself if what I want is over there. This is what I have come to so far.

I'm impatient to start my family. I don't enjoy being single & at 36 almost 37, I don't want to wait 2 years for the income, before I become desirable marriage material for an American woman. I feel like the clock is ticking for me to be an active engaged father & not just an old guy with kids. However, I'm not attracting/finding women with the physical beauty or with the character & values I want. I could wait 2 years until I have the income to see if that changes or I could look in the FSU now, but that comes with the problems of cultural & language barriers.

The other question is: is what I want even to be found over there?

What I want:

I've never been one of those guys who needed to date a 10 to feel attracted or fulfilled. As long as I'm sexually attracted to the woman & respect who she is as a person I'm happy. In fact, I've dated 9's & 10s & lost sexual interest in them after losing respect for them or feeling mistreated by them. Finding a woman I respect has been the difficult part. As a doctor, you must be extremely hard working, driven, independent, motivated, & organized. Honestly the path to MD is pure hell. You cannot simply wake up in the morning & wander through life without goals, plans, & drive. I find most women, (to be fair, I find most people, in the U.S.) to be of pretty weak character & I find professional woman to be unfeminine, liberal, & not family orientated. Conclusion I want a women with character, loyalty, the ability to overcome & endure hardships, isn't spoiled, entitled, & selfish. I find American women who grew up middle class or higher, who have always been given everything by their daddies almost never meet this criteria. 

I was raised to believe motherhood was as valuable if not more so than my role as provider. I look at women who don't want children like there is something unnatural about them. I was taught raising children was the most important accomplishment in life. (If you're thinking I grew up religious you are right, even if I'm not anymore, some values stick). I believe it's the man's duty is to provide protection, financial security, & be the leader. While the woman is to care for the home, children, & her husband. I don't mean she is a glorified maid. I always helped with the cooking & cleaning. I mean more so in bringing that intangible feminine grace, peace, & perspective into a home as well as emotional support ect. I watched this video (link below). The purpose of the video was to show how horrible Russian women were. It had the opposite effect on me. I thought wow if this is how Russian women think, I want one! Except for the very end of the video which in my opinion is nothing more than a man abusing his role as the head of the household, traditional roles do not equal control of the woman. IMO traditional gender roles are 2 people teaming up & taking on equally valuable roles they are more biologically suited for. Let's be honest, it would also be nice to ask your wife for something to eat without being called a chauvinistic pig. I was frustrated in my marriage because I felt I had no control over my life. One time my ex moved 9 hours across TX to Houston with my daughter so she could be close to her parents. I was told if I wanted to be close to her I better move too. I would make simple requests like no, you should buy this car not that car, I don't think we can afford the more expensive one, then basically told to fuck off. Of course when she couldn't make her payment, it was my responsibility. In a nutshell the ex did whatever she wanted & I could be damned. Conclusion: I'm looking for someone who prioritizes family & has traditional values, at least in gender roles.



Is what I want in a woman to be found in the FSU?

The hell if I know. Maybe the character/values of FSUW is all myth. That is basically what I am hearing in this thread. I hear they are very materialistic & just as entitled thinking they are going to end up on private jets ect. I messaged with an attractive 30 yo woman with a 7 month old daughter. P.S. A child doesn't bother me at all. In fact, I'd prefer she have a child. Children mature you & change your priorities. With a 5 yo I need a women with that mindset already in place. She told me she got knocked up by a 23 yo guy. I'm thinking, what kind of 30yo woman thinks a good lay is worth risking getting knocked up by a 23 year old? No shit he isn't around & you are making it on your own. I instantly lost respect & interest for her. Between that early experience & what I am hearing on this thread I'm thinking, Don't waste your time over there.

On the other hand, the youtube video makes me think maybe she is over there. Conclusion Unless after reading this you guys can tell me something more definitive about FSUW, I guess the only way to find out is to go over there & get to know a few women.   

I will take ML's advice though. I'll put more effort into looking for women from the U.S. & expand my geographical search. I'll have accumulated enough vacation time by early fall for a trip and go with the attitude of  It never hurts to look, maybe I find someone maybe I don't, just enjoy the ride. I've been as open & soul bearing as possible here feel free to be blunt with me. 
« Last Edit: June 06, 2020, 04:47:58 PM by redking11 »

Offline BillyB

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #40 on: June 06, 2020, 06:47:43 PM »
is what I want even to be found over there?


I dated FSU women living in America while I was communicating with FSU women overseas. I found my Ukrainian wife living in Libya and met for the first time in Ukraine. There are perfect girls for you in every country. Don't limit yourself to looking in one spot. Look for a wife as hard as you worked in MD school. You're likely to get good results.

The horror stories you heard about American women are true. But there are many good, not overweight, and family oriented American women but most are married and they tend to stay married so what's left over isn't appealing. A lot of good women overseas hold out longer for a suitable partner and financially secure is one thing they look for in a partner so Western men have an edge over the local boys.

Conclusion: I'm looking for someone who prioritizes family & has traditional values, at least in gender roles.


My wife is conservative and we both are fine with gender roles. She does the dishes, vacuum the floor and I take care of the cars and outside. We don't have a calendar telling us who's turn it is to do what. There is no finger pointing if something doesn't get done because we know our roles. Discuss how you envision a family should be before marrying any woman.
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Offline rwd123

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #41 on: June 06, 2020, 09:03:03 PM »
The other question is: is what I want even to be found over there?
...
Conclusion I want a women with character, loyalty, the ability to overcome & endure hardships, isn't spoiled, entitled, & selfish.
Needle meets haystack. :)

That's where you may need to compromise on any set of criteria for a future wife. Personally I don't care too much about age or if a woman has children* but character is non-negotiable. You can't judge that over the Internet.

*I'll ask straight up about the relationship they have with their father, and if relocation would be an issue.

Maybe the character/values of FSUW is all myth.
Of course it is. Women are different. There are distinct cultural differences but women are women.

Consider a holiday to Russia with your daughter. She will probably love Russian circuses. The puppet theatres are great but she won't understand the dialogue. Sochi Park can be fun, also the Experimentarium in Moscow. I'd suggest you plan a holiday with your daughter so you have a taste (of Russia) first before dating... or even sneak in a date or two on that trip.

Offline Shadow

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #42 on: June 07, 2020, 04:04:27 AM »
You can find what you look for anywhere, the point is to not exclude anything.Before meeting MrsShadow I looked locally, the US, Argentina, Norway, Ukraine and a number of other places.But remember you got to live with theworst habit of a person, not the best ones.
No it is not a dog. Its really how I look.  ;)

Offline Shadow

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #43 on: June 07, 2020, 04:07:31 AM »
Russian has 6 cases. German has 4 and there isn't a website out there that doesn't list it as more difficult. Everything else sounded like solid advice.
You may be right. For me after Lantin, Arab and ancient Greek the Russian language did not seem overly complicated...
No it is not a dog. Its really how I look.  ;)

Online 2tallbill

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Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #44 on: June 07, 2020, 10:48:56 AM »
The other question is: is what I want even to be found over there?

They have EVERYTHING in the FSU and every type of woman.
They have women who can sing like angels and women who
makes the neighbors dog cry when they sing in the shower.

They have women who can cook up a feast from scraps they
found in the refrigerator and they have women who can set off
the smoke alarm boiling water for tea. They have women who
can do advanced calculus and they have women who can't count
to 11 without using their toes.

They have angels and they have women who are evil incarnated.

I spent a lot of time doing everything wrong, chasing the wrong
women from the wrong place and the wrong age. I started refining
my processes and tactics and got progressively better at this each
time that I tried. I spent 9 years finding my Angel Eyes. Life interrupted
my search, business upheaval, a family sickness and later death, local
girl friends and a multitude other things caused me to pause my pursuit. 

Pursuing an FSUW takes a lot of time, money and emotional resources.


One time my ex

You had a bad experience with a local girl, we all have. Earlier I advised
spending time, making a list of what you want and what you don't want. 
My list had plenty of exwife stuff on the 'don't want' side of the ledger.

I especially decided that I would know the person inside and out before
I married her.

I'll bet that you saw the prerequisites to your exwife's flaws before you
married her. I advise this time looking deeply into a woman especially
her character before marrying her. This is your excellent chance to get
it right.

You have to kick a girl with character issues to the curb no matter how
hot she is. So many men can't do this.


I will take ML's advice though. I'll put more effort into looking for
women from the U.S. & expand my geographical search.

I've been as open & soul bearing as possible here feel free to be blunt with me.

It's really the time thing that worries me about your situation.
I spent a zillion hours on finding, getting to know and winning
Angel Eyes heart. I visited her 4 times in one year, she came
to visit me twice. (I only spent 9 years trying to find her).

« Last Edit: June 07, 2020, 10:51:24 AM by 2tallbill »
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline CaptB

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #45 on: June 19, 2020, 12:56:34 AM »
I am too tired tonight to make any lengthy contributions.....or advice.  From a single reply....#44....I would recommend 2tallbill's post #44. I have not been here in quite a few months. I enjoyed a small glass or three of good port.....expecting to read....not advise. "redking11" You strike me as a fairly sane, logical fellow. You ask questions.....and sometimes give your "own" answers.......most of which seem fairly sound. "2tallbill", BillyB and others offer sound advice. There is no perfect "system".........No "perfect advice". You are considering a mate who is not only a "woman"......but of a different culture. From what I see about your character.......your expectations are sound......you seem to answer (in a good way) your own questions....with reasonable answers.


I am 67 years old. The problem with this forum........is the age of its members. 15 years ago My advice would be considered "sage advice".......married a whole 3 years. But now at almost 17 years of marriage.......the "experts" here......think any advice from such a person.......is old fashioned......out-dated. I can only offer a few tidbits.......hardly advice......on this process.


1) COMMUNICATION - In 2000 I went to Russia for the first time. My friend had met a woman from a company called "Lifetime Partners" based in California......with an office in Tver, Russia. I was going to Australia in six months......but changed my mind after meeting a future friend who lived about an hour drive away. We met on Russian Women Guide. He was going beck to see his fiancee.......I was making my first trip to see Russia. I used some of the services from his agency.......but I was not interested in finding a Russian wife. To make a long story short .......I wrote 16 letters to women in Tver.
I received 14 replies (yes old-fashioned letters......typed by hand......signed with a pen......handwritten returned address.....with a real stamp} One was engaged........one was away for the summer.........but did contact me at the end of my trip.The letters were brief.....2 paragraphs.....telling about myself and asking questions about the women. 15 replies out of 16 letters......compare that to today.


I found my wife on a small obscure dating site called TrueLoves.com......defunct long ago. The sight was started by a guy who built the site to find his own Russian bride. A very nice guy (had half-dozen phone calls) who would not tolerate fake profiles etc. He was "US"......just on of the guys. He did find that perfect RW. I was lucky to find his website. I was looking for a guide/interpreter to show me around Stavropol, Russia. My (future) wife was registered on TrueLoves by her friends......not herself. She had helped so many friends interpreting letters etc.......with foreigners. She was not interested in finding a foreign husband. she had a good job.....a lot of friends......nice relatives. I hired her as a guide/interpreter for three days......but after more than 100 hours of phone calls....in three months......it turned in to two weeks. 100 hundred hours of phone calls.....and no question marks during our conversations. I was lucky. She had taught English at a foreign language academy for fifteen years. I was 49.....she was 38.




2) OVER THINKER< OVER PLANNER< OVER ANALYZER.........
I was in LifeTime Partners office one morning when a (about 40) Japanese American accountant came into the office. I asked him ..what he was reading ? he had a notebook with about 70 pages in it. He said it was his manual for finding the perfect mate. I said....."interesting". After a few days he asked me out for breakfast across the street. He noticed I seemed to enjoy the dating process. I told him I was previously married.....and learned a few things.
The next day.....I offered to pay for breakfast. I asked if I could look at his notebook. I glanced through it.......then tossed it into a waste basket near-by.
He looked horrified !!! I picked the notebook out of the trash......and gave it back to him. The next day he showed-up.......sans the noerbook.......he said he would try it with-out the book. By the end of his three-week trip he was was engaged. Nice girl....nice guy....nice couple. Do your homework......but don't overdo it.


3) SCALES


1-10..............The biggest roadblock for "men" especially. Never liked "scale of 1 - 10........(hint) women do not like it .......either. You can make it easier on yourself. My "scale".......(After divorce)......became "YES....or....NO". If you are attracted (physically) then move on to other important things.




Other stuff,


Just too old & tired,


Capt B
"A Yooper in Moscovia"

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #46 on: June 19, 2020, 04:25:07 PM »
I am 67 years old. The problem with this forum........is the age of its members.
15 years ago My advice would be considered "sage advice".......married a
whole 3 years. But now at almost 17 years of marriage.......the "experts" here......think any advice from such a person.......is old fashioned......
out-dated. I can only offer a few tidbits.......hardly advice......on
this process.

Capt B

The boy looks for girl, boy finds girl, boy seduces girl and wins her
heart only the VERY first item is different than from when my
80 year old Dad was single (I was 7 when he got married the second
time).

All the important stuff still is done analog.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline CaptB

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #47 on: June 19, 2020, 10:34:36 PM »
Only "too old and tired"..........last night......after polishing off a half bottle of a good red port.


Capt B
"A Yooper in Moscovia"

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #48 on: June 19, 2020, 11:33:21 PM »
What percentage of profiles on the more popular dating sites like Russiancupid, Ukrainecupid and Rbrides are fake?

What are some things that make you guys think a profile is fake? Some things that cause me to tag a profile as fake are: 1. the woman messages me first 2. the profile isn't filled out at all or has very little information. 3. the women looks like a model and all the photos are professional photos with no photos from everyday life. 4. the woman's profile says she is looking for a guy is about any age range, (I don't really think a 31 yo woman is interested in a 65 yo man.) 4. If I do get a message it is very bland and non-specific. 5. some information doesn't seem to be realistic like height and weight ratios are far off.

What other things to you guys see as redflags? I'd love to hear what you look for and what you think of my perspective.

also, other than the 3 sites I mentioned what other sites are our there that people use and like?

Hi Redking, I think the sites you mention are more towards the PPL model or at least see out to cash in. I got that impression when I checked out Russian Cupid a while back. I know I quickly left the site because of that reason or because the women contacting me were numerous very quickly within a short time period and with obvious fake profiles. Think it may have been the case that I was deluged with these without even having put up a photo. That is always a good move to make if you want to see how genuine a site is put up a profile without a photo and if you get a load of correspondence through then it's not a good news day. I mean how many genuine women are going to contact a guy who they can't even see his photo? They want to know what the guy at least looks like, who they are talking to, if they find him hot and for security concerns of course.

If my memory serves me right I think the Russian Cupid site had a category of 'bra size' for the lady to put down. Nice for us men to know but another sign as to the implausibility of the site/profiles. Women in general even in the FSU don't tend to feel right disclosing that info to the general male population unless there is a pretty good reason. It seems more to get the men horny, another red flag. Ukraine Cupid I vaguely recall us the same as Russian Cupid, it's their sister site, same format I recall.


FDating isn't a bad free site to get going on, there a a few fake profiles and scammers there but I believe way, way less than Russian Cupid etc. Stuff you mention can be Red Flags but not always. Other stuff can be just one photo in the profile, the photo looking like it could be off a billboard or similar, the girl wanting to take you to a PPL site to correspond further - a classic scammer technique, etc. I think you would certainly do better to drop using sites like Russian Cupid and the like. There may be some genuine profiles there but you're giving yourself a harder task being deluged by those that aren't.

Other thing to take on board that even genuine profiles on whatever site doesn't necessarily mean the girl doesn't have motives that aren't sincere. Some girls are after an immigration mule, some only want to meet up with guys to get him to buy her stuff, some just want to meet up for casual enjoyment, some just to meet a foreigner, etc.

You can off course meet a girl who is interested vin a long term relationship even marriage and kids but dealing with a site where there are a ton of scammers and fake profiles isn't making the odds any easier. You tend to learn along the way though many tale tale signs though that something is not right. It takes time to learn this, travelling out to meet women only to find out that they may have other motives worked in, etc. So pay careful attention to how the girl corresponds with you and these take take signs can show. It can really be a case of going out and meeting different girls to get the experience though to know. Trying to believe you know without much experience can cause a problem in itself. Some guys end up making the mistake of becoming Scammer Hunters and end up finding what they most sought to avoid in the first place by obsessing over it. As they saying goes, 'you find what you are looking for if you look hard enough'. Some guys even think girls are scammers when they aren't because if the tinyest of matters such as a profile not being fully filled out, etc.

Depending on your level of activity in going out to see FSW it may be between 2-3 years, possibly more before you can tell within a short space of correspondence whether there might be issues there. I would definitely leave the site you are on though and try Fdate, DMnotify, etc.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline SteveInBoston

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Re: Weeding our fake profiles
« Reply #49 on: July 24, 2020, 05:57:24 PM »
The real value in this thread has been in forcing me to think about what I want in a woman, why I am looking to the FSU, & really forcing me to ask myself if what I want is over there. This is what I have come to so far.

I'm impatient to start my family. I don't enjoy being single & at 36 almost 37, I don't want to wait 2 years for the income, before I become desirable marriage material for an American woman. I feel like the clock is ticking for me to be an active engaged father & not just an old guy with kids. However, I'm not attracting/finding women with the physical beauty or with the character & values I want. I could wait 2 years until I have the income to see if that changes or I could look in the FSU now, but that comes with the problems of cultural & language barriers.

The other question is: is what I want even to be found over there?

What I want:

I've never been one of those guys who needed to date a 10 to feel attracted or fulfilled. As long as I'm sexually attracted to the woman & respect who she is as a person I'm happy. In fact, I've dated 9's & 10s & lost sexual interest in them after losing respect for them or feeling mistreated by them. Finding a woman I respect has been the difficult part. As a doctor, you must be extremely hard working, driven, independent, motivated, & organized. Honestly the path to MD is pure hell. You cannot simply wake up in the morning & wander through life without goals, plans, & drive. I find most women, (to be fair, I find most people, in the U.S.) to be of pretty weak character & I find professional woman to be unfeminine, liberal, & not family orientated. Conclusion I want a women with character, loyalty, the ability to overcome & endure hardships, isn't spoiled, entitled, & selfish. I find American women who grew up middle class or higher, who have always been given everything by their daddies almost never meet this criteria. 

I was raised to believe motherhood was as valuable if not more so than my role as provider. I look at women who don't want children like there is something unnatural about them. I was taught raising children was the most important accomplishment in life. (If you're thinking I grew up religious you are right, even if I'm not anymore, some values stick). I believe it's the man's duty is to provide protection, financial security, & be the leader. While the woman is to care for the home, children, & her husband. I don't mean she is a glorified maid. I always helped with the cooking & cleaning. I mean more so in bringing that intangible feminine grace, peace, & perspective into a home as well as emotional support ect. I watched this video (link below). The purpose of the video was to show how horrible Russian women were. It had the opposite effect on me. I thought wow if this is how Russian women think, I want one! Except for the very end of the video which in my opinion is nothing more than a man abusing his role as the head of the household, traditional roles do not equal control of the woman. IMO traditional gender roles are 2 people teaming up & taking on equally valuable roles they are more biologically suited for. Let's be honest, it would also be nice to ask your wife for something to eat without being called a chauvinistic pig. I was frustrated in my marriage because I felt I had no control over my life. One time my ex moved 9 hours across TX to Houston with my daughter so she could be close to her parents. I was told if I wanted to be close to her I better move too. I would make simple requests like no, you should buy this car not that car, I don't think we can afford the more expensive one, then basically told to fuck off. Of course when she couldn't make her payment, it was my responsibility. In a nutshell the ex did whatever she wanted & I could be damned. Conclusion: I'm looking for someone who prioritizes family & has traditional values, at least in gender roles.



Is what I want in a woman to be found in the FSU?

The hell if I know. Maybe the character/values of FSUW is all myth. That is basically what I am hearing in this thread. I hear they are very materialistic & just as entitled thinking they are going to end up on private jets ect. I messaged with an attractive 30 yo woman with a 7 month old daughter. P.S. A child doesn't bother me at all. In fact, I'd prefer she have a child. Children mature you & change your priorities. With a 5 yo I need a women with that mindset already in place. She told me she got knocked up by a 23 yo guy. I'm thinking, what kind of 30yo woman thinks a good lay is worth risking getting knocked up by a 23 year old? No shit he isn't around & you are making it on your own. I instantly lost respect & interest for her. Between that early experience & what I am hearing on this thread I'm thinking, Don't waste your time over there.

On the other hand, the youtube video makes me think maybe she is over there. Conclusion Unless after reading this you guys can tell me something more definitive about FSUW, I guess the only way to find out is to go over there & get to know a few women.   

I will take ML's advice though. I'll put more effort into looking for women from the U.S. & expand my geographical search. I'll have accumulated enough vacation time by early fall for a trip and go with the attitude of  It never hurts to look, maybe I find someone maybe I don't, just enjoy the ride. I've been as open & soul bearing as possible here feel free to be blunt with me.

Hello,

Sorry for the late response, but I haven't been on this site in a while.

1)  It will be 2 years before you can start a family..extend your family with an FSU woman.  It will take that long to search, date, and find the woman you want to marry, and get her here in the US.  More than likely, it will take 3-4 years if the first few women you meet don't work out.  Remember, you can meet online and chat, but it's the in person meeting that will tell you if the woman is right or not.  And with your career and kid, you don't have much travelling time to stay overseas long enough to meet enough women to find the right one.  It will probably take you several trips.

2)  You can find traditional value women in the US. It might take you a while, but then searching for someone overseas will also take a lot of time.  And I suggest try to meet older women in your search range - they will probably be more traditional minded than younger women.


I am not discouraging you in your search.  I just wanted you to be aware of the realities of this endeavor to set your expectations.   I have been lucky and/or blessed, because it has worked out extremely well for me.  I hope if you do pursue this that it works out equally well for you.

 

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