An Anastasia Date in Odessa

[alex330]

and dresses for weddings too:-)))
what was the cost of the trip (approx) , how long have u been in there?

Total trip cost was maybe $2500? I  was there around 4 days total after after taking into account time for travel. You could do it for a bit less or a lot more I am sure.
As mentioned, I found it hard to spend money once there with someone you get along with. You are able to spend quality time just sitting in a park talking and really enjoy each other.

[brave girl]

I get a text at 6 am the next morning from Tanya. She is in a great mood and wants to meet. She apologizes for waking me so early but I am excited and don't care. She comes over to my apartment a couple hours later and looks wonderful. I run out the apartment when she arrives and try to pay for her cab and she laughs and says I am weird as the cab drives off before I can reach him. We head to go get breakfast at a snug little cafe. We walk around holding hands and talking. It is a bit chilly but the sun is out and it is nice. There are many weddings taking place as it is Saturday and Tanya shows me around. We go to the store together and pick up a bottle of champagne and some local cheese and head down to Arcadia Beach. We spend the rest of the day on the beach sipping mimosas and laughing and talking. It is very enjoyable and I feel like I am a kid again.  Her English is getting better by the day. She tells me she studied it in the University and just does not use it as often as she'd like. The day is coming to a close and we decide to leave. We take separate cabs as our accommodations are in opposite directions. I ask her if she wants cab money and she tell me no, but  something does not feel right with her response. I tell her I would like to pay for her cab ride and she smiles and accepts. It is the way you phrase things that seems to matter.

She deftly haggles over the price for a couple pirate cabs and I ask her if she would like to meet later that night. She nods her head back and forth. I am confused by this, but have found certain expressions are not the same. I go back to my apartment and take a nap and wake up that evening. I call and text her and get no answer. I do not want to waste my last full day in town so get online and begin to chat with other women and line up several tentative dates for the next day, but they all want me to use their own interpreters and my heart is not really in it. I like Tanya.

Please explain this behavior to me?? 
I do not understand what it is!!  brave girl

[brave girl]

I am 37 years old and the girls were 23 and 24. This age difference is very normal here in South Florida.

IF you are rich (have the money) I would agree!! 
If not I would strongly disagree with this statement!!  brave girl

[alex330]

Please explain this behavior to me??  
I do not understand what it is!!  brave girl

"She nods her head back and forth. I am confused by this, but have found certain expressions are not the same. I call and text her and get no answer. I do not want to waste my last full day in town"

The mixed signals threw me off at the end of our amazing day and figured I would go on a casual date with another woman if she did not call me the next day is all.
Was not about to sit around in my apartment all day.

[alex330]

IF you are rich (have the money) I would agree!!  
If not I would strongly disagree with this statement!!  brave girl

Next time you are in town let me know Brave Girl and I will take you to South Beach so you can see.
The reasons vary down here due to financial situation, modern medicine, Latino culture, and just a more open mided population I suppose.
I would agree with you if the couple was 50 and 23, but 37 is still pretty young. People are in great shape and take good care of themselves around here.

[kievstar]

Great trip report.

Based on what you wrote Tanya is really into you but she is not the right one for you.  Your to quick to jump to another women.  If she was the one, you would not be looking around.  I did the same thing on past trips and did not want to be bored on trips and always wanted a woman around.  What I learned was none of them were for me.  With my now wife I never looked around after first meeting her.

Women will tell you there busy and surprise you later by ready to meet.  They do this to see if your dating several women on the side.  To gage how serious you are.

I would suggest you break things off with Tanya as your going to break her heart.  You lead her on she is going to turn into one of those professional daters.  Professional daters are made and not born that way.  Men make professional daters including foreign men.

[Faux Pas]

Next time you are in town let me know Brave Girl and I will take you to South Beach so you can see.
The reasons vary down here due to financial situation, modern medicine, Latino culture, and just a more open mided population I suppose.
I would agree with you if the couple was 50 and 23, but 37 is still pretty young. People are in great shape and take good care of themselves around here.

alex330
I hope you don't take this the wrong way and I only state it to give you something to reflect on. You have made a number of classic bonehead mistakes from the beginning up to and including to this point in your TR. You strike me as a pretty sharp resilient type of guy who has made some chicken salad out of chickenshat. Something you should remember is that there isn't a lot of difference in a 22-23 year old Ukrainian lady and a 22-23 year old American lady. If you think there is, you are only fooling yourself.

I don't fault men looking for the younger hot hard bodies but, if you were dating them in South Beach, why did you go to Ukraine to find one? What seems a mystery to you about FSUW now will fade in time and you'll understand what I am saying. It's still new to you, the  hot slightly different look and sexy accent is a hellva lot of fun. When you get past that you'll realize that is still just a 22-23 year old woman under there. Not a child and not yet a woman. While same age relationships between FSUW and WM fail all the time, they are not as near frequent as large age gaps. 13-14 years is a large age gap in the US and even in Ukraine. They are in essence a generation apart. You are still a sprite 37 but in 13 years you'll be 50 and she at a sprite 35-36. Fool yourself into thinking you are different than everyone else and you'll be in for a long uphill battle. no need to reply unless you want, just something to think about. I am enjoying your TR. Thanks for sharing.

[alex330]

Hey Kievstar and Faux Pas, you both have very valid points and I appreciate the input. Some of it I agree with and some I could argue of course. People and situations differ greatly in life.
We are talking it slow and we may find there is something that makes us incompatible. You cannot know the other person after a weekend together. We will see I suppose.

PS - I am taking my profile of the RW sites for now. I will date locally for a bit if things do not escalate between Tanya and I. Tanya seems to want to keep her options open. She does not want to rush into anything. She even mentioned she would never do the K1 route. She said the government is insane if they think two people can decide on a lifetime commitement in 3 months. I do not think I will break her heart.  

[Dave13]

Great trip report, any ideas on were you plan on meeting with Tanya again.

Best of Luck!

[Dave13]

alex330, I find it perplexing, how someone can faulty you with making mistakes, first you did get your butt on the plane, most guys just talk and talk. Then you, hired your own interperter, so they work for you and not the agency, you realized after just one date, the other lady was playing you, and you moved on. Now your willing to take some time to work on this relationship.    Again Alex listen to your gut, I tried dating AW ,after my first trip to Russia, didn't work!

Dave

[Faux Pas]

PS - I am taking my profile of the RW sites for now. I will date locally for a bit if things do not escalate between Tanya and I. Tanya seems to want to keep her options open. She does not want to rush into anything. She even mentioned she would never do the K1 route. She said the government is insane if they think two people can decide on a lifetime commitement in 3 months. I do not think I will break her heart. 

Dating women across the ocean is very taxing in both time, financial and emotional resources, which is why many of us who have done it, do not recommend it. I agree with Tanya. 3 months isn't long enough to decide on a marriage which is why it is highly recommended that you do not attempt to do so. If she is the one or if she isn't you can determine this by returning (plan now that it will be a number of times) and plan on extended stays. IMHO, you should plan on at least 3 months face time with her before even filing a K-1 application. I would even advise longer face time but after going through it, I know how difficult that is.

alex, you were serious enough about going over there that you actually went. Many do not and only fantasize about the fantasy. You are at a crossroads, I would recommend you give consideration to all the possibilities that include a relationship with Tanya or any other FSU lady not working out or even getting to a solid K-1 stage. It really does take much investment, both emotional as well as financial to do it right and develop a strong relationship with a life long partner. Are you "up" for it? Don't take that question as a question of your sincerity or manhood or some blow to your ego. Only you can answer it to yourself truthfully. It is a very long dusty road on an endless hot summer day to reach what can be great reward or colossal disappointment and failure.

Good Luck

[JR]

alex330, I find it perplexing, how someone can faulty you with making mistakes, first you did get your butt on the plane, most guys just talk and talk. Then you, hired your own interperter, so they work for you and not the agency, you realized after just one date, the other lady was playing you, and you moved on. Now your willing to take some time to work on this relationship.    Again Alex listen to your gut, I tried dating AW ,after my first trip to Russia, didn't work!

Dave

I agree with Dave here Alex, you did more things right than wrong. Excellent first trip, thanks for sharing.

[innakrug]

I get a text an hour later from the agency interpreter telling me that Olga cannot see me tomorrow but would like to see me on Sunday. I tell her that is the wrong answer for a guy who has just traveled halfway around the world to see someone. She quickly replies that she will talk to Olga if she is not sleeping and try to patch things. I tell her to not worry about it and cut them both loose.

Good for you. It is almost painfull to read what you are guys going through It is obviously a scam. It is simply disrespectfull to  treat any person who travel half of the world, without any knowledge in culture and language, this way. I feel relay sorry for you. It brings back some memories about conversations I had in American Embassy in Moscow. Sad, sad stories

[alex330]

Great trip report, any ideas on were you plan on meeting with Tanya again.

Thanks Dave, JR and Inna 
The trip was not perfect of course but I had a great time and met somebody I really like. Cannot ask for more and I can laugh when looking back at the Olga incident.

Not sure on next meetup. Any ideas for a place in between Miami and Odessa would be greatly apprecated.

[Gator]

I agree with Dave here Alex, you did more things right than wrong. Excellent first trip, thanks for sharing.

Agree also.  I gave you a B for strategy/plan (not an A because you worked with Anastasia) and a B-/C+ for "battlefield decisions."

It really does take much investment, both emotional as well as financial to do it right and develop a strong relationship with a life long partner. Are you "up" for it? Don't take that question as a question of your sincerity or manhood or some blow to your ego. Only you can answer it to yourself truthfully.

Agree

[Gator]

Not sure on next meetup. Any ideas for a place in between Miami and Odessa would be greatly apprecated.

Europe is expensive and not a place to get to know someone (too much sightseeing and and too many shopping opportunities).  You may be judged based on what you buy her.

The Caribbean is getting hot now.  If not to hot, the DR would give her a taste of South Florida summer weather. 

Costa Rica is a fun trip - white water rafting, beaches, snakes, etc. to test her spirit.

My suggestion is return to Ukraine.  Rent a car and have her show you her country.  If it goes well, you could meet her parents at the end of the trip.  Meeting the parents is a BIG DEAL with sincere UW.

[Dave13]

I had a blast in Phuket Thailand, it has beautiful beaches, great diving, plus your lady will have no problems entering the country.

Dave

[brave girl]

Next time you are in town let me know Brave Girl and I will take you to South Beach so you can see.......Latino culture....

I have seen 5 years of the latin mens behavior in Miami 

Your to quick to jump to another women.

This is the Latin mens behavior!! 
Behavior is much like Russian men they control the woman, have a bad temper also like many young girls to play with!!  :evil:  brave girl

[brave girl]

I would suggest you break things off with Tanya as your going to break her heart. 

I agree!!   brave girl

[Handycam72]

Europe is expensive and not a place to get to know someone (too much sightseeing and and too many shopping opportunities).  You may be judged based on what you buy her.

Oh bugger!!!! That means all my dates are going to have to be outside Europe. How as Europeans did we ever manage to create friendships and relationships in a place that is just terrible for getting to know each other, and don't get me started on those shops. 

[daveyj]

I sometimes wonder if perhaps this section should be renamed "Trip Defenses" or "Trip Judgements"?  Similarly, I'm frequently amazed at the incisive ability of some (clearly gifted?) people to derive a concise yet comprehensive assessment of two strangers and their relationship potential based solely upon a few short paragraphs.  I was a Shakespeare director and yet never managed to develop such an incisive understanding of my actors despite scores of hours spent working with them.  I clearly have a lot to learn.

Thank you to the OP for sharing his trip and his well written posts.  I'm glad to hear that you and Tanya seem to have had a very pleasant experience together.

ps. roundtrip airfare Kiev to Punta Cana, Dominican Rep, is approx $1500 via Air France, connecting through Paris, 17 hours out, 13 hours back, including connection waiting times.  www.tripadvisor.com is a great source of information for all locations around the world wrt hotels/things to do, etc.

[Donhollio]

I sometimes wonder if perhaps this section should be renamed "Trip Defenses" or "Trip Judgements"?  Similarly, I'm frequently amazed at the incisive ability of some (clearly gifted?) people to derive a concise yet comprehensive assessment of two strangers and their relationship potential based solely upon a few short paragraphs.

 It does seem to happen too many times.   To the OP, I'm glad you had a positive experience in the city of Odessa! As a guy who has spent months in that 'pearl of the sea'  I can tell you there are many good, sincere, honest girls. Keep the communication going, the work has only begun, but just think of the summer holidays sitting on a Odessa beach with beers flowing all day long!

[Maniac999]

 Thank you for your great report, Alex, and answering questions.
 I would also suggest DR , a very , very romantic place to meet your girl.
 Bahia Principe resort is my favourite( spanish chain), probably, a little more expensive , but it worth it.
 Good luck in developping your relationships!

[GQBlues]

Lookwise I date similar women here in the US.

Thanks for the report. I have just one advice.

If the statement above is the truth, then save yourself time, money, and grief and forget FSU. I'm with Faux Pas on this one as I will never recommend other men do this. I am convinced the FSU is justifiably the final frontier for a lot of men, for better or for worst, and if you're half the man you say you are - trust me on this one - it isn't for you.

[Maniac999]

  If it goes well, you could meet her parents at the end of the trip.  Meeting the parents is a BIG DEAL with sincere UW.
 
 A very doubtfull statement, sorry to say that.
 I know PLENTY of ua families , happy to see foreign ''friends''of daughters  in their home.All of them are just expecting to be gifted with something ( expensive alcohol , wiskey, etc -for the father , sweets( perfumes ) for the Mom,toys for kids ( if have ones at home)...
 As about families with single parent ( Moms, who is usually listed at the same dating sites where the daughters are ) - they even asking a foreigner to make some masculine home jobs ..
 Foreigners are very welcoming in FSU families:-)
 It happens all the time ....