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Author Topic: Newbie Looking for advice  (Read 11704 times)

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Offline rwd123

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #25 on: November 07, 2021, 07:50:26 PM »
Getting involved with complete strangers from a war zone is not a terribly good idea.

There are so many fish in the sea I don't know why guys would pick a polluted pond. Even if the girl is legit there's a real risk of mental issues such as PTSD and her family would still be living in a war zone... unless you bail them out as well.

Pick another place throw your rod.

Online Brillynt

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #26 on: November 10, 2021, 02:08:26 PM »
Even if the girl is legit there's a real risk of mental issues such as PTSD and her family would still be living in a war zone

That is a pretty big assumption.  I seriously doubt that you have to worry about PTSD.  Would I be more careful in vetting someone? Definately.  Getting to Rostov Don is pretty easy, there are buses every day from Luhansk and Dotnesk. A lot of ukrainians go there for shopping to find things they cant find locally, especially medications.

Offline jjschwegman

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #27 on: November 11, 2021, 08:26:33 AM »
Well, as most of you predicted, the bottom fell out.  We talked about meeting in Rostov-on Don in Russia, which she claimed she needed an international passport.  Ok, she's going to check on that, although I know from this forum and checking, that it runs about $22 at most.  Turns out she is going to need $280 to make this happen due to her living in a conflict zone.  I called her out on it, and of course, I'm an asshole for questioning her honesty, how could I, etc., etc.  I couldn't resist throwing in a jab and told her that if she's successfully making money scamming people this way, then have at it.  There are a lot of stupid people in this world and stupid people and money don't stay together too long.  So, that's the second scam from UkraineDate, so off of that site and signed up for Elena's Models, which is more pricey, but seems to have a nice mix of women of all ages, sizes, and looks, and a lot of them state that, "you have to come to my country first to meet me, and then we can meet somewhere else internationally".  I like that, although I'm sure there are scammers on that site as well.  Anyone have good or bad luck on Elena's Models?

Offline ML

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #28 on: November 11, 2021, 09:53:04 AM »
Well, as most of you predicted, the bottom fell out.  We talked about meeting in Rostov-on Don in Russia, which she claimed she needed an international passport.  Ok, she's going to check on that, although I know from this forum and checking, that it runs about $22 at most.  Turns out she is going to need $280 to make this happen due to her living in a conflict zone. 

What do you mean "Turn out . . . .  ."

Do you mean that is true, or that is only what she told you ?

And, it could be out of date . . . but some years back, Ukrainians and Russians could go across borders without International Passport.

OK, just checked with my wife.  She is not certain, but thinks this changed a few years back.  International passport needed by Ukrainians to go to Russia.

But more considerations.  Many people in the conflict zone have obtained Russian Internal passports.  In that case, they can freely go into Russia.

And, it could be that it will cost the gal $280 to get a Ukrainian International passport . . . when all costs are considered.

She will have to travel to a city controlled by Ukrainian government.  So she will have to pay for transportation, plus a hotel room for several days, and even more  money to get expedited results.

You may have just 'screwed the pooch.'
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline Boethius

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #29 on: November 12, 2021, 09:09:28 AM »
I agree, it could cost $200 or more to get a passport from the conflict zone. 

The passport itself is only about US$25, but if a woman lives in the conflict zone, she needs to leave and go to Ukraine to obtain a Ukrainian passport.  So, there are travel costs - to get there, and to stay somewhere for the 5 to 15 days it will take to get the passport and to pay bribes to obtain it. 

I know that to cross into Crimea, Ukrainian citizens need their international passport.
« Last Edit: November 12, 2021, 09:20:46 AM by Boethius »
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline Davo

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #30 on: November 12, 2021, 10:52:59 AM »
Don’t confuse him....  This woman was a scammer. She followed the script and dotted every “i” and crossed every “t” along the way..... A classic example of an email scammer that us actively using dating sites experience everyday and those claiming to be from the war zone make up the majority of first contact scammers.

It’s a great cover story...... Men can’t travel there so not only can they catch the usual keyboard Romeos and lazy men who want a wife delivered to his door with the visa /airfare scam, but serious men who are willing to travel with the scam pulled on the OP.

I met a woman online yesterday. 10 minutes later we were on a messaging app and 10 minutes after that we had a 2 hour phone call..... This is how real woman behave in 2021..... No BS excuses that her daughter broke her phone....  They won’t waste their time on a man they can’t instantly hear and see, because they want to know if to keep or cull you ASAP.

Back a year ago he would have been flamed big time here for continuing to plan his trip after being told she’s a black list woman...... It’s good to see we are more newbie friendly, but we’ve gone too far in the other direction 😉

« Last Edit: November 12, 2021, 11:21:11 AM by Davo »

Offline Boethius

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #31 on: November 12, 2021, 11:13:28 AM »
I doubt he is confused.  But the point is, one can't take a cost online, and assume it is gospel. 


I do happen to agree with rwd on PTSD.  Better to just avoid women living in the conflict zone completely.
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline Davo

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #32 on: November 12, 2021, 11:26:12 AM »
I doubt he is confused.  But the point is, one can't take a cost online, and assume it is gospel. 


I do happen to agree with rwd on PTSD.  Better to just avoid women living in the conflict zone completely.

I understand where you’re coming from and it’s ok to pay for these costs (I spent 2k trying to bring a woman to me, that was refunded), just not for a woman you haven’t been video chatting and calling regularly, who makes excuses why she can’t.
« Last Edit: November 12, 2021, 11:28:55 AM by Davo »

Offline Jumper1

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #33 on: December 01, 2021, 02:07:49 PM »
Of course she plans to use you to get her and her daughter to USA.

Whether your status will be as a pack mule or something else . . . that is the unknown.

One good predictor is how far above your weight you will be boxing.

Western men can 'trade up' with FSU gals . . . but how far up is it safe to go ?

To me that's Russian roulette philosophy.
Integrity based on physical appearence (or size of wallet) compatibility ?really?
Trench is loving this.


For every smokinhotkova that bailed on a balding middle aged trailer park guy,
There's  a handsome wealthy executive with half his worth missing from an average looking woman he thought was *safe .

Could a huge mismatch  indicate something?
Well sure.

If the op  marries someone ,he should take whatever time is needed to know them as a person,their values,Integrity.

I feel you have held the belief you can never truly know, I suppose there is some truth to that.
Even a good judge of character can get surprises either way .

However if you know a person reasonably well, know their history,their actions past and present(those speak far louder than words) I believe character is normally pretty obvious.


Most surprises are far more from a *love is blind*position,where one,or both parties completely ignored charater traits through out .



Offline Jumper1

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #34 on: December 01, 2021, 04:40:08 PM »
Well, as most of you predicted, the bottom fell out.  We talked about meeting in Rostov-on Don in Russia, which she claimed she needed an international passport.  Ok, she's going to check on that, although I know from this forum and checking, that it runs about $22 at most.  Turns out she is going to need $280 to make this happen due to her living in a conflict zone.  I called her out on it, and of course, I'm an asshole for questioning her honesty, how could I, etc., etc.  I couldn't resist throwing in a jab and told her that if she's successfully making money scamming people this way, then have at it.  There are a lot of stupid people in this world and stupid people and money don't stay together too long.  So, that's the second scam from UkraineDate, so off of that site and signed up for Elena's Models, which is more pricey, but seems to have a nice mix of women of all ages, sizes, and looks, and a lot of them state that, "you have to come to my country first to meet me, and then we can meet somewhere else internationally".  I like that, although I'm sure there are scammers on that site as well.  Anyone have good or bad luck on Elena's Models?

It's boy meets girl , 5 blocks away,5 states away ,or 5 countries away.

Anything that seems off ,is off.

Would a woman from Albuquerque want to meet you in  Canada first?
No ? Why not?

Move away from anything that seems goofy.

There are cultural differences,very few of which have an impact on initial dating.
The ones you might  lose over mistaking those few differences initially, wouldn't likely have been a good cross cultural.match regardless.
It takes someone pretty open minded, tolerant and adventurous to relocate around the world from.family and friends successfully.
Add in the new relationship pressures  , you'll need to be flexible and  patient yourself

So if you bother with this venture I wouldn't sweat the small stuff like what website is best at all.
None of them are best.none.


And i wouldn't rule out that woman from Tucumcari az, either (unless she asks to meet you in moose jaw Canada and says her phone is broke)

« Last Edit: December 01, 2021, 04:43:03 PM by Jumper1 »

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #35 on: December 01, 2021, 04:51:38 PM »
It will be valuable info for other men to see what excuse she’s using to ask for $$$

My favorite is my Babushka needs a new kidney, we got all
the money saved except the last $800 dollars.
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline Jumper1

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #36 on: December 01, 2021, 05:12:34 PM »
My favorite is my Babushka needs a new kidney, we got all
the money saved except the last $800 dollars.

See Bill, this is where my curiosity takes me, if i am.Yuri, how do I come up with $800 being the magic number..
Did I ponder what my mark.might find acceptable? Was it just a specific amount I wanted ? Did I think $826 would be suspicious?  Would $799 seem.like a  fake  *sale price? And so forth..
 lol

Offline Daveman

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #37 on: December 01, 2021, 08:02:24 PM »
so off of that site and signed up for Elena's Models, which is more pricey, but seems to have a nice mix of women of all ages, sizes, and looks, and a lot of them state that, "you have to come to my country first to meet me, and then we can meet somewhere else internationally".  I like that, although I'm sure there are scammers on that site as well.  Anyone have good or bad luck on Elena's Models?

Great luck for me.. a decade ago. So not up to date with the current status. There are few scams, if any, like what you posted above, but there are other types of which to be wary. Mainly the pro daters. They'll meet you (and most anyone) and let you pay for everything, have a romp of a time on your dime, feign wonderful emotions and thoughts of the future but no real interest in marriage or moving -- perhaps waiting for Clooney to head over or something.

You'll recognize them pretty easily after chatting with a number of normal women. They're just a bit -- different.  :devil:

They're far more subtle than the GIMME MONEY types, but you'll catch on easily enough.




« Last Edit: December 01, 2021, 08:06:48 PM by Daveman »
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline Daveman

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #38 on: December 01, 2021, 08:24:00 PM »
Additionally.. probably doesn't apply to you (it never does.. eh?)

For whatever reasons if you have trouble dating at home, you'll have trouble dating there. Regardless of the packaging they're just women. There are some nuanced differences but they're attracted to the same qualities in men that women from anywhere in the world are.
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline ML

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #39 on: December 01, 2021, 08:27:44 PM »
. . . there are other types of which to be wary. Mainly the pro daters. They'll meet you (and most anyone) and let you pay for everything, have a romp of a time on your dime, feign wonderful emotions and thoughts of the future but no real interest in marriage or moving -- perhaps waiting for Clooney to head over or something.

I feel discriminated against in that I did not meet any pro daters.

Well, maybe I did . . . but just that they only lasted one date and we never met again.

But no real difference between them and many other gals I met whom I never followed up with for any number of reasons.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline SteveInBoston

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #40 on: December 02, 2021, 06:04:23 AM »
Just jumping in on this discussion about Donbass.

1. Scammer central.

2. Ukrainians in Donbass have a difficult time getting into Ukraine right now.  They have closed the border to most (on the Ukraine side) and the only reliable way is a car or bus service that leaves the conflict zone toward Rostov-on-Don into Russia, then all the way around Russia to the Ukraine border at Mitnitsya Goptivka just north of Kharkiv.  About 18 hours on average (from Donetsk).  Then however long from there to the destination in Ukraine.

3. Ukrainians in Donbass do not need an international passport to go to Russia.  Just their national passport.

4.  Car service to Rostov should be about 2000 rubles (rubles or USD is the main currency in Donetsk).  By car service I mean 3 or 4 people sharing a car ride.  Bus is cheaper, personal car more expensive.  There is no regular schedule - need to arrange the date/time with the driver.

5.  Everyone has internet and smartphone.  Even if they cheap out and only have voice/sms, plenty of stores and restaurants provide free internet.  We video chatted with Papa yesterday to wish him a happy birthday.  He wants cowboy boots for Xmas.  Heh.


T went back to Ukraine in mid September and had to go to Donetsk to check on Mom and to sell some personal things.  It took 26 hours to get there via car service and about 30 hours to get back via bus in mid October.  The bus had a breakdown somewhere near Belgorod.  She only used her national passport and stashed her internation one (with the US visas) with Sis-in-law.

Mom visited SIL earlier this year and was able to drive her own car with a special permit.  I was only a 6 hour drive with half that time waiting to cross the border.  Mom traveled to visit SIL last week and tried to use the permit again but they stopped her at the Ukraine border.  She had to return and took a car service a couple days later - 28 hour trip.


Online 2tallbill

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Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #41 on: December 02, 2021, 06:54:54 AM »
For whatever reasons if you have trouble dating at home, you'll have trouble dating there. Regardless of the packaging they're just women. There are some nuanced differences but they're attracted to the same qualities in men that women from anywhere in the world are.

FSUW are not for entry level daters. This the black diamond skiing
area of the dating world.

If you have never been on a horse before would you enter a rodeo
saddle bronc competition? 

Jumper1 builds rocket-ship dirt bikes. Climbing on a rocket ship dirt
bike and entering the Baja 1000 or the Pikes Peak Hill Climb would
be not be recommended for beginners either.

Very few guys dating FSUW don't get "bucked" off the first time.
I certainly did.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline John Gaunt

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #42 on: December 02, 2021, 09:38:44 AM »
FSUW are not for entry level daters. This the black diamond skiing
area of the dating world.

If you have never been on a horse before would you enter a rodeo
saddle bronc competition? 

Jumper1 builds rocket-ship dirt bikes. Climbing on a rocket ship dirt
bike and entering the Baja 1000 or the Pikes Peak Hill Climb would
be not be recommended for beginners either.

Very few guys dating FSUW don't get "bucked" off the first time.
I certainly did.
So you’re not Bronco Billy then???

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #43 on: December 03, 2021, 02:21:51 PM »
So you’re not Bronco Billy then???

I was too stubborn to quit.
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline Daveman

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #44 on: December 03, 2021, 03:15:25 PM »
I feel discriminated against in that I did not meet any pro daters.

Well, maybe I did . . . but just that they only lasted one date and we never met again.

But no real difference between them and many other gals I met whom I never followed up with for any number of reasons.

Didn't you always do VM trips with little prior communication?  Nothing wrong with that. In fact. if I were to start this process over.. I wouldn't go the same route. I'd just go there and meet women wherever.  Granted not all would be open to relocating or dating a foreigner but I'd bet the interest level would be statistically the same with cold approach there or here. 

All of my trips were to visit one lady after writing and speaking with .. I really have no idea how many.. er.. more than one.  Patterns emerge.
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline Daveman

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #45 on: December 03, 2021, 03:22:10 PM »
I was too stubborn to quit.

The magical formula for failure, knowledge, and success.
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline ML

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #46 on: December 03, 2021, 05:19:05 PM »
Didn't you always do VM trips with little prior communication?  Nothing wrong with that. In fact. if I were to start this process over.. I wouldn't go the same route. I'd just go there and meet women wherever. 

Yes, I always did WMVM trips (for first meetings that is).
And, there was adequate communication.  That was between 6-10 emails back and forth for the 6 weeks just before my arrival.
I packed a lot of info into my outgoing emails so that, upon meeting, I didn't have to tell my life story to each gal.  She already knew it.
That allowed us to have light banter instead of Gestapo like grilling.

I would never just go and hope to meet gals wherever.
I did meet a few interesting gals by chance in my apartment buildings, etc., but they would not have filled up my trip if I had gone empty handed to FSU.

I did meet one woman in an apartment elevator.  We spent a lot of time together and she even came to USA on a business trip and spent close to a month with me.  But we really didn't have the required 'big spark.'
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Online 2tallbill

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Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #47 on: December 04, 2021, 11:54:11 AM »
The magical formula for failure, knowledge, and success.

I worked really hard at not repeating the same mistakes and reviewing
what I did right and what I did wrong. Making different mistakes every
time was as important as my stubbornness.
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline Kaizen

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #48 on: February 05, 2022, 07:47:54 AM »
I was too stubborn to quit.

And that's how you "Cowboy Up".  LOL

Online 2tallbill

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Re: Newbie Looking for advice
« Reply #49 on: February 06, 2022, 07:58:23 AM »
And that's how you "Cowboy Up".  LOL

 :D

Let me go back to the black diamond ski run analogy. Once you've mastered
skiing the steeper slopes, the bunny slopes aren't nearly as interesting.

Once you've dated a hot, educated, engaging, interesting woman, then dating
Plain Jane,  Boring Betty and Lumpy Lucy loses it's luster.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

 

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