Trench's Questions and Philosophies

[msmob]

Pretty girl, Bournemouth Uni student perhaps?

Well if it's not money then she's probably gone fir a Mr Personality type of guy, a bit 'in crowdy'.

Let me guess, she posted the photo on Instagram

A fail on all counts - What ARE you good at ? (( The photo was promoting her biz

[Trenchcoat]

A fail on all counts - What ARE you good at ? (( The photo was promoting her biz

Which is?

[msmob]

Which is?

Bearing in mind your proximity - keep guessing

[msmob]

My first wife was Irish. (Passed away)
An amazing women everyone loved.
I fell for her in about a day..lol granted she felt the same so we never really parted after that first meeting ,love at first sight and all that. It does occur.

Dear AJ/Jumper

The sad thing is I fell in love with my 'Irish' wife the first time I saw her, too - but I found it hard to love her when she became pregnant and the mood swings ...  we lasted 10 years - but only stayed to be with the kids ... ((

It was better for them for us to live separate lives

[John Gaunt]

“We don’t go around sniffing arseholes like dogs do”

well...
on second thought, never mind....

[Boethius]

trench,
   as I said earlier, I don't think you have a "small problem" but a large one, and that even if I don't understand the nature of this problem, I think maybe YOU do, but are ignoring whatever it is

100% I know lack of money is a big problem for you . .

I think she's out there, just not in Ukraine

An FSUW willing to move abroad has a specific type of personality.  If she didn't, she would not have the ability (I mean psychologically)  to move abroad.  I think this, in particular, is why this quest is not for Trench.  Such women will want to work, and typically are quite ambitious.  Those that are willing to stay at home usually have husbands who are relatively wealthy, and can provide them the finer things in life. 

When I think of the FSUW who posted here, some ended up with really great careers, some worked alongside their husbands in their husbands' businesses, and a few did not work, but they all married rather wealthy men, and chose to make their husbands' six figure careers a priority for the family.  When I think of the FSUW I know personally, all of them work, even those who never had to.  One woman I know, who had a coveted position in the FSU, works as a custodian, although her husband had tons of money, and she didn't have to work.  She wanted to work.  He was retired, and drove her to work daily.  She couldn't really find another position, as she doesn't speak English well, and never bothered to learn.  Her husband would have sent her children in the FSU money monthly, but she wanted to do so, and she was bored sitting at home.  Her husband passed away recently, and she still works, taking the bus over an hour each way, because she doesn't want to sit at home, although she has a paid for home, her late husband's pension, and hundreds of thousands of dollars in savings at her disposal.

So, I don't think the "personality" of such FSUW will be for Trench.  He doesn't want a "go getter", and certainly, such a woman, or even one who stays home, will demand he make a far better salary than he does currently.

[krimster2]

agree with what you say...

but the FSU has a LOT of personality types and not only the one you've described
I don't know if you've ever seen any of the "mismatched" couples of Ukrainian Woman/Western Man like I have
where you just scratch your head and probably have a puzzled look on your face, and these relationships have a DIFFERENT dynamic
but the odds of finding "one of these" is much less than finding what you describe (my wife's one of those)

it's hard for me to penetrate Trench's opaqueness, Trench to me is the opposite of the noted story teller BillyB
BillyB is VERY transparent to me, I find it hard to understand Trench, and for me that's UNUSUAL
I have a feeling that there is something else "going on" besides finances
it's just too difficult to "see" through an RWD lens

all of my experience validates what you say, that Ukraine is not at all the right place for Trench, unless he wants to "play"
but the hour glass is emptying...
according to a survey, men reach their peak of desirability at age 40, I believe Trench's current age
therefor going forward, Trench will have even less of a chance...

my experience in the UK, you HAVE to be in a big city, this MAXIMIZES your opportunity
for a 100 different reasons, I feel that this is the better choice for Trench

my inadequate explanation of not judging and showing compassion, and in return not being judged and receiving compassion, is important but not understood by Trench




 


 

[Boethius]

Yes, there are a lot of personality types in all countries.  However, those that are willing to leave everything known behind, to move to a new country, alone, have specific personality traits.  The only ones I know of who don't are girls, usually youngish, who were talked into marriage by their mothers.

[krimster2]

"The only ones I know of who don't are girls, usually youngish, who were talked into marriage by their mothers.
Report to moderator  "

add to that women whose circumstances and life experiences in Ukraine would make you cry...
that's the other type I see...
and they are more common than one would think (or not, it's Ukraine after all)
would not advise Trench to marry one of these, most but not all are damaged, and it would be hard for any spouse to cope
but I have seen these relationships work
where two cripples who can not stand by themselves, somehow are able to stand by holding on to each other...
it's rare, but it sometimes does happen

[Boethius]

Yes, but it is unlikely such women are on dating sites.

I would add, I am just stating my view based on years of observation.  But in the end, Trench has to do what he believes is right for him.  It is usually the risks we don't take that haunt us, however, if he is going to embark on this, he needs to be looser with the cash.

[krimster2]

msmob

love Oxford, I designed a chip for a company in Cambridge called ANT Communications
spent some time there...thatched roofs...what happens if there's a fire???
used to take the bus back and forth between Oxford and Cambridge, passed the river i've seen in films for the "oxford/cambridge rowing contest"
normally buses don't allow you a good look at the scenery
but with this bus, I usually had my face glued to the window

did you live in Yorkshire up North, didja eat the puddin?
my daughter's learned to make Yorkshire pudding, it has no influence on the size of her allowance 

[krimster2]

"...but it is unlikely such women are on dating sites."


Yes, VERY unlikely they'd be on a dating site, abused people don't have the confidence, and are more fearful



"however, if he is going to embark on this, he needs to be looser with the cash."

money, or the lack of it, is a SHOWSTOPPER, as far as I am concerned, Trench and I are very different
for me the anxiety that I might disappoint my spouse, would be overpowering
I don't think Trench feels this...


"It is usually the risks we don't take that haunt us"

was this statement spawned by something you've read about, or personal experience?
i'm all ooshkie...

[Boethius]

I generally don't regret things, as I believe everything happens for a reason.  I do regret not taking a government job when I had the opportunity.  The work would not have been as interesting as what I was exposed to, it was litigation oriented, but it would have given me more free time.  But, I have met a lot of fascinating people in my work that I otherwise would not have ever met, so I guess this was my path.


I know lots of people who regret paths they didn't choose.

[krimster2]

my similar regret, when my "time was up" in the military, they dangled a "plum" in front of me
if I "re-upped" they would send me to the "Defense Language Institute" at the Presidio of Monterey, California and I could pick whatever language I wanted
at the time, it was considered the best 2nd language learning institution in the USA
but, I'd have to pull 4 more years, I said "no thanks"
in 1992, I ended up meeting Gorbachev and Raisa at this very place, which was hosting a fundraiser for Gorbachev's foundation
I sat across from an elderly Russian man, who was Stalin's English translator!!!

I think if I had picked Mandarin, I probably would have ended up eventually moving to China and being a permanent resident there
one of the potential career moves for my daughter, was law, she's bi-lingual Russian/English, I thought someone like her with a specialization in Russian/American finance
would be in great demand in the future
glad she rejected this, cuz look where that's going!!!!

[msmob]

love Oxford, I designed a chip for a company in Cambridge called ANT Communications

Have only heard of a Slough based Co. of that name - HATED living in Oxford ..if you aren't part of the academic scene ....

used to take the bus back and forth between Oxford and Cambridge, passed the river i've seen in films for the "oxford/cambridge rowing contest"

??

As that's in London - don't know how ?

The Service is now the X5 - used to involve two bused in my day .. One to Bedford - then change for Cambridge

did you live in Yorkshire up North, didja eat the puddin?
my daughter's learned to make Yorkshire pudding, it has no influence on the size of her allowance 

It is a national 'dish' ... ))

If your thatch roof catches fire - better hope you're insured

[BdHvA]

If your thatch roof catches fire - better hope you're insured

In the Netherlands it is becoming difficult to insure thatched roofs, what is the reality in the UK?

[krimster2]

t'was awhile back, I think "ANT" was bought or something

that wasn't the river!  it sure looked like it to me, and I saw some rowers out there, and it looked like the PERFECT spot

the thatched roof seemed odd to me in what would otherwise be a conventional looking house

makes sense to split up the ride, don't remember how long it was, maybe 2 hour?
but a REALLY nice ride

[msmob]

3 hrs 40 mins

http://www.stagecoachbus.com/plan-a-journey  Enter Oxford and Cambridge ! 

Used to be nearly 3 hours to Bedford from O'ford and another 1hr 40 to Cambridge

[msmob]

In the Netherlands it is becoming difficult to insure thatched roofs, what is the reality in the UK?

Even an 'ass' could find that answer ( quoting your description of me  )  ....

Now anytime you can prove where I've misled or fibbed - or you could be a good chap and admit that you know you posted bollox

[BillyB]

prove where I've misled or fibbed -

You're living in la la land if you don't think you mislead or lie. Almost every time you talk about American politics is a good place to start.

[krimster2]

it's possible that when I bought tickets, that I got a "bus transfer"
the memory of the ticket purchase vastly overshadowed by the scenery (last time was 15 yr ago)

I think it was the last stop at oxford, there was a "Georgain" looking building with some 18th century(?) gravestones in front, all right outside the window
no way my American University would have graves in front of one of the admin buildings in the campus, unexpected and unique


in the USA we have strict "building codes" thatched roofs are illegal
why do people choose this, esthetics, tradition?

[Trenchcoat]

Bearing in mind your proximity - keep guessing

Beautician.

[msmob]

Beautician.

I refer the honourable gentleman to the advice of earlier ... 'keep guessing' [ not a bad guess - she did study in that field ]

[krimster2]

i'm going to guess something "sales" related
in the usa a lot of beautiful women go into sales
probably most lucrative here would be pharmaceuticals and selling to doctors/hospitals
they're all beautiful young women
a strange coincidence, idn't

[msmob]

You're living in la la land if you don't think you mislead or lie. Almost every time you talk about American politics is a good place to start.

Poor Silly BillyB - unlike you - I understand the difference between an informed opinion and what you post ...

Said 'gentleman' is probably hoping for help from someone - if you feel you can 'help' him - amuse us