I can't tell if my 2 month Russian romantic interest was a Prof. Dater?

[Dolmetscher007]

ME: 43 - Male - USA - Divorced (13 years) - No kids - Software/Tech Industry
HER: 35 - Female - Russian (Moscow) - Single - No kids - Office manager for Acer - International Computer Company

Before I'd ever heard of this forum, or even of trying to meet an Eastern Woman online, I'd met a woman from Ukraine here in my home city in the US, who met her US husband online. She's smart, cool, beautiful... so... the more she told me about her "story," the more I started thinking... "Geez! I gotta get me one uh these!!!  " When I asked her how they met, she told me... "Go to www.russiancupid.com, sign up, and you will start meeting beautiful ladies on the first day!"

I was not prepared for the level of fake accounts, obvious scams, and bots. I've used online dating in the US, and there is a little of that, but very little. This was an all out onslaught off phony messages. Pretty quickly, I did start to to recognize the patterns. But then I met... "Anastasia." I'd was dealing with so many fake messages, the fact that she messaged me first made me totally suspect right away. So, I didn't really take her seriously for the first day or two, at least. But her profile had obvious thought put into it, and she had 5-6 non-professional photos, mostly selfies. She had composed detailed messages about herself and what she wanted to find. And she not only filled out her own details, but gave specifics about the man she wanted to meet. So, for several reason, I thought maybe she's normal. But I was still paranoid.

So... I enjoyed chatting with her. We definitely "clicked" from a personality perspective. Things started to feel a little weird for me, however, as I realized I was telling her lots about my life, job, etc. But she wasn't offering up really anything about herself. We'd exchanged last names in conversation, so I tried to find her on social media. I found nothing. I asked her what company she worked for. She didn't want to tell me, saying, "I haven't known you that long." That was weird to me, but what do I know? Maybe I'm too open.

Eventually, a few weeks into talking, I was going to send her just an $8 bottle of maple syrup. I know you aren't "supposed to send gifts" and all that... but this was part of a conversation we'd had, and it's only maple syrup. But during the exchange about her address... she told me her last name, and it was different from the last name she'd given me a week or more prior. At that point, I thought... Okay, something's not right here. So... I got a little harsh with her and told her that in situations like these, even little lies seem more pronounced. She was like, "What are you talking about?!?" At first, I thought she was trying some bullshit technique of pretending she didn't lie. But she was saying the name she gave me was her "father's name" and it is completely obvious to anyone with a brain that it's not her last name. etc etc. and then she just said... I'm going to bed. Good bye.

I Googled it, and... she was right. the name she gave me was obvious to anyone who knows about Russian names, her father's name plus -ivna. I felt... embarrassed. Now, don't get me wrong. At this point, I wasn't taking any of this stuff seriously enough to get like, really all upset about anything. But... I did feel like I was really enjoying out conversations. She would send me photographs and videos of herself showing me her nice outfit at work... or whatever. We were trying to set up a video chat the very next evening. I called it a "Video Date."  And then... from her perspective... I basically called her a scammer who lied to me about all this stuff including her name. Only... none of that turned out to be the case. Oops.

So... I thought... I know how Russian ladies love to get flowers. I'm going to send her some flowers. I got online... and did it. The next morning, when I woke up... she'd sent me photographs of herself, holding the flowers, at the front desk of her office, with the company logo right over her shoulder. And she told me how much she loved them and appreciated them, and that I guess it's fine for me to see her company name. etc etc. So... we just agreed to put it all behind us. And we did.
For the next 4-5 weeks, we exchanged texts most days. We talked on the phone a few times, and then did a video chat. It was all really nice. I can't lie and say that it was a total fireworks display of love, because... well... at my age, I just don't get that excited about things as much as I did when i was 20, and I think she was kind of the same way. Also... there did seem to be a slight difference in our personalities. She never asked me anything really about me.

She'd send me tons and tons of photos of herself and videos of herself. She really loved for me to just tell her how beautiful she is. And she loved to ask my opinion on different shoes, or watches, and all things fashion. She also loved to send me cheesy "cute" Instagram videos of tiny rabbits or kittens. It started to feel... extremely one-sided. Like... I had asked her tons and tons and tons of interesting questions about her life growing up, what her parents did for a living, how she was as a teenager, what kind of music she liked, everything. Then I realized... she always answers, but... not even one time in almost 2 months had she even gone so far as to say, "And how about you?" So... here we go again... I started to wonder a little about her.

I eventually started to put together some context clues that she must have multiple guys "on the hook" all sending her texts about how beautiful she is. Once I finally did find her social media accounts... every image she'd post of herself would get 50+ likes or comments from men who lived all over the world. UK, Germany, Australia, US... all saying things like, "Sexy!" "Beautiful!!!" So I just got a skeptical taste in my mouth. And then... she started asking me... "When are you going to send me that maple syrup, and that hoodie? I'm starting to feel depressed." If any other woman had specifically reminded me of a gift I'd already told her I'd bought for her, I would not think anything of it. But considering all this shit... I didn't like her asking me that.

Then... one day... out of nowhere... she just disappeared for 3 days. I finally asked her "Is everything okay?" She said, "Actually No. I'm disappointed in everything, I'm disappointed in life, love, my country, everything. I'm going to sleep." And she switched off, and was gone for another 2-3 days. Since we'd talked every day until then... it was weird for her to be gone that long. So... based on her comments about being disappointed in... love... I took that to mean she is either disappointed in me (which would make no sense)... or she is disappointed in some other guy (also not a very pleasant thought). So... eventually she messaged me and just said, "How are you doing?" And she immediately sent me two videos of herself showing me what she's wearing, making pretty model poses with her hair etc.

I just said... "To be honest... your comments about how disappointed in love you are, and then not hearing from you for days, it sure does take a lot of confidence for you to just pop back up with "How you doing?" and a couple more of your little beauty pose videos. Self-confidence is good, but I think your opinion of yourself is maybe a little too high, if you think I'm going to be just happy to hear from you with no explanation.

Her response was just "Ok."

Then about 15 minutes later... "Bye."

She then immediately blocked me on WhatsApp. I was disappointed, and bummed that she didn't at least give me some kind of clue about what happened. But... I couldn't un-do any of it now. Later that night, I realized she'd blocked me on Instagram too. I'd never even communicated with her on Instagram.  So I went to Facebook... and she'd blocked me there too. We weren't even "Friends" on Facebook. She must have searched for me... found my account... and blocked me, proactively , assuming I might try to contact her there.

It all hurt more than I thought it would/should. It didn't kick my ass or anything, but... I'm the kind of guy who always wants to learn a lesson if something doesn't work out. But in this case... I really do not know what lesson I should learn. I can't tell if A.) She was a total scammer, and any other guy could have spotted her bullshit a mile away. Or. B.) Maybe I just don't understand Eastern women... or women in general. Or I took things too personally too quickly... or...

You know what I mean? I don't think I have any emotional issues. I do fine with ladies normally. But... I definitely did let the constant thought that she might be a scam artist, color everything. What do you guys think? And please... I have super thick skin, so... do your worst.

[BillyB]

Paranoia will destroya. That is probably what happened here. It seems she invested a lot of time into you video chatting and on the phone. Sent you lots of photos and videos and didn't ask for money. You accused her of a few things and took too long to make a decision to visit. Seems like she's a beautiful girl, gets lot of attention and has plenty of options.

[Steamer]

I doubt she was a pro dater, she sounds fairly typical.  Russian women generally play their cards close to the chest and don't volunteer a lot of personal details at first. She was probably feeling you out too.


No, it sounds like she decided that you two just weren't right and that's OK. Every interaction is a learning experience and I don't think you did anything terribly wrong. A small bit of skepticism will serve you well and keep you from deceiving yourself. Better luck next time.

[Davo]

In my online experience she isn’t a scammer or prodater and she showed that by time she committed to chatting, the videos and pictures she sent, video chatting and calling, giving her name and address and showing you where she worked in her flower picture.

The one sided chat is typical in my experience. Some actively ask you lots of questions about you and your life once they trust you and others let you lead the conversation and allow you to offer information about yourself as you see fit. They won’t push for information.

The woman I’m hoping to return to soon was like this. I lead the conversation 90% of the time in texts (and still do) and she wouldn’t ask me much unless I volunteered it, then she would discuss what I’d told her. There was still lots of humour and flirting on both sides, but being the man I took charge and directed it where I wanted it to go and she was happy with this..... Phone and video calls were different, she would talk more and there was obvious chemistry the more we chatted face to face. When we met in real life often I couldn’t shut her up 😂 and the chemistry was amazing.

I don’t think the comments on instagram from other men is an issue also. If she’s an attractive woman with good English skills, she’ll have a lot of online attention and chat with lots of guys. Just like you they are curious and track her down on social media.... I do this too.

Apart from the mistake you made with not understanding Russian names, you might see her asking about the maple syrup as a red flag, but the experienced guys here will tell you, and I found this out the hard way..... If you told her you bought her a gift and she didn’t get it in a reasonable time, you haven’t done what you said you would (broken a promise) and this is one of the biggest red flags for a FSU woman, when she’s sizing up potential suitors. I’ve learnt to never say I’ll do anything unless I’m 110% certain I can follow through, no matter how insignificant it is like a bottle of maple syrup.

[japtats]

She sent you photos of watches, shoes etc as indirectly telling you what to get her. The kitten photos etc, is very common, shows her emotional side. There are women in FSU i came across who loves their cats, cute as hell, but would push you under a bus for $150. I had many women who would randomly pick up a flower and put it on their hair, and look at me like a puppy, thinking i will say 'OMG she is so cute and warm hearted', i cringed inside.

There is no games with FSUW, every move is calculated and cunning. I have no idea if she was a prodater or what, but if a woman sleeps with a guy, she is just testing to see if the guy will be a 'real man' and take care of her needs. FSUW are generally not escorts, they won't sell their bodies in such a way, but will sell their bodies indirectly to a man they feel can care for them.

[tfcrew]

 

  I know you aren't "supposed to send gifts" and all that... 

After a fashion...gifts are OK. Just hold off on the diamond necklace right off. Also readers---don't pay too much attention to the japtats post...

... would push you under a bus for $150. I had many women.... i cringed inside....  with FSUW, every move is calculated and cunning.... but will sell their bodies indirectly to a man they feel can care for them.

He's not the Mr Experienced man of the world guy that he imagines himself. His cringe inside made me want to cringe too 

[2tallbill]

Then... one day... out of nowhere... she just disappeared for 3 days. I finally asked her
"Is everything okay?" She said, "Actually No. I'm disappointed in everything, I'm
disappointed in life, love, my country, everything. I'm going to sleep."

And she switched off, and was gone for another 2-3 days.

Good girls don't do that. She has some sort of issue(s) and you can't fix it.
My advice is to move on.

[Dolmetscher007]

You accused her of a few things and took too long to make a decision to visit.

I definitely didn't take too long to make a decision to visit. Right now, Russia is closed to all foreigners due, I assume, to COVID. But, she and I talked often about when I will come to visit her.  In fact, the last conversation we had was about how I just saw on the news that Russia is planning to reopen it's borders soon. So... she definitely knew I was planning to visit as soon as the Visa ink was dry.

[Dolmetscher007]

Good girls don't do that. She has some sort of issue(s) and you can't fix it.
My advice is to move on.

I think this, what you've said here, is more the point than anything. I think I'm a little bit butt-hurt that she basically said "Ok, Bye" and blocked me, with no explanation. So, I think my ego got a little tap on the nuts, but... at the end of the day... Prof Dater or not... she was a depressive type who seemed intensely frustrated with her job, her life, her city, her boss, her coworkers... and in the end... obvously with me. But... I didn't do anything (major) wrong.

And that's just how I'm going to look at it from now on. Ha ha ha...

Thanks @2tallbill

[BillyB]

She sent you photos of watches, shoes etc as indirectly telling you what to get her.

I took it as is she already owns those things and asking the OP how it looks on her. When my wife buys shoes, lingerie, sunglasses etc... she will parade around in front of me asking how she looks. She may return the items if she gets negative feedback. The OP's girl is popular on social media and I doubt she gave everybody as much attention as the OP. The OP may have been her favorite.

I definitely didn't take too long to make a decision to visit. Right now, Russia is closed to all foreigners due, I assume, to COVID. But, she and I talked often about when I will come to visit her.  In fact, the last conversation we had was about how I just saw on the news that Russia is planning to reopen it's borders soon. So... she definitely knew I was planning to visit as soon as the Visa ink was dry.

How long have you communicated with her? Women over there expect the man to figure out how to keep the family together. Have you suggested meeting in a country next door to hers? If there is a problem, you need to figure out the solution. It doesn't matter if America, Russia or COVID is separating you from your girl, figure it out. Ph4tst4x in his intro thread was trying to figure out anything and everything to be with his pregnant fiancee. Although you are not that tight with your girl, it seems she invested a lot of time into you compared to the other boys out there.

Popular girls may get dozens of messages everyday. Most of those guys won't visit since they are keyboard Romeos. Some of those girls waste a good chunk of their life communication with guys who will never visit. She's trying to figure you out as much as you are trying to figure her out. You were probably her favorite out of all the guys messaging her. Some girls have a time limit for their man to take things to the next level in a relationship. If you fail to make a move in time, you lose.

 I think I'm a little bit butt-hurt that she basically said "Ok, Bye" and blocked me, with no explanation. So, I think my ego got a little tap on the nuts, but... at the end of the day... Prof Dater or not... she was a depressive type who seemed intensely frustrated with her job, her life, her city, her boss, her coworkers... and in the end... obvously with me. But... I didn't do anything (major) wrong.

And that's just how I'm going to look at it from now on. Ha ha ha...

Rejection is a part of life. A lot of girls over there have a habit of cutting things off abruptly and disappear when breaking up. They make a decision to move on and not listen to the excuses. It's probably for the best so the man doesn't waste months of his life trying to win her back. If she really wanted your money and gifts, she would've made an effort to get something out of you before disappearing. I'm not convinced she's a bad girl. I'm not even convinced she's a depressed person. She wants her man to comfort her saying everything is going to be alright. Of course a man of action will last longer in a relationship than a man of words.

[GQBlues]

I can’t relate how men can be so immersed in someone they haven’t met, much less rely on a daily dose of communication for months on in. I won’t have the patience in a week much less month/s.

Anyway, she has issues, and to some extent, so do the OP. The gal had the OP as a captive audience. That should be the other way around. You either get yourself busy with your social life locally, or at the least communicate with more than one girl, preferably the former.

Never chalk bad behavior to cultural differences. I won’t blame her for flaking with someone she hasn’t met either. After all, she’s a single woman who obviously is in love with herself.

Anyway II: if she didn’t want to give you her employment info, how is it you sent her flowers at home and she takes pictures of herself with it in her place of work the next morning?

You cannot lose anything you never had. Move on.

[tfcrew]

I definitely didn't take too long to make a decision to visit. Right now, Russia is closed to all foreigners due, I assume, to COVID.

Would suggest a safe neutral country if at all possible.

[fathertime]

You cannot lose anything you never had. Move on.

Fathertime! 

[Chelseaboy]

 FSUW are generally not escorts, they won't sell their bodies in such a way, but will sell their bodies indirectly to a man they feel can care for them.

Hmmmm i know a guy from Dubai.


He tells me the clubs out there are full of FSUW selling their bodies as escorts,particularly Russian and Ukrainian women.

[Davo]

Hmmmm i know a guy from Dubai.


He tells me the clubs out there are full of FSUW selling their bodies as escorts,particularly Russian and Ukrainian women.

Places like Thailand and Hong Kong are notorious for Russian prostitutes.

[GQBlues]

Places like Thailand and Hong Kong are notorious for Russian prostitutes.

I thought it was Egypt, Korea and/or Turkey?

[Davo]

I thought it was Egypt, Korea and/or Turkey?

Lol..... prostitutes are Russia’s biggest export. Most Aussies first contact with a Russian is being accosted by them on the sleazy entertainment strips of Thailand...... There are many Russian strip clubs that are fronts for brothels. I’ve been told the Russian mafia are teamed up with the criminal groups in Thailand that control the sex industry. They send girls by the boat load.

http://youtu.be/u3DxZo-sTuo

[2tallbill]

she basically said "Ok, Bye" and blocked me, with no explanation. So, I think my ego got a little tap on the nuts, but... at the end of the day... Prof Dater or not... she was a depressive type who seemed intensely frustrated with her job, her life, her city, her boss, her coworkers... and in the end... obvously with me. But... I didn't do anything (major) wrong.

And that's just how I'm going to look at it from now on. Ha ha ha...

Thanks @2tallbill

You're welcome and you've found this site which has a ton of good information on
it on how to locate, find and pursue a FSUW. One thing that I've noticed is that
some FSUW make a decision to cut ties and move on so quickly that you feel
like a carton of milk they found in the refrigerator that is two weeks past the
expiration date.

I advise that guys do the same. Once you've determined that a girl doesn't
have what it takes to be the future Mrs D007 dump her and move on. Delaying
the inevitable is delaying finding your future happiness.

Udachi!

Bill

[japtats]

Hmmmm i know a guy from Dubai.


He tells me the clubs out there are full of FSUW selling their bodies as escorts,particularly Russian and Ukrainian women.

I asked my gf about the woman sending photos to OP, instantly she said, that is the stuff she wanted him to buy her, most guys will sayy, 'oh that is what you want?', and send the money or buy it. She said she blocked him as he is nothing to her, which was my belief also. My gf has friends who will send one pic to 10 guys, she said it is scary, but that is how it works. This woman isn't depressed (One OP conversed with), she just wants stuff, but my gf said she may of had sex with OP, and took it further, just depends what type of man he is. Not a girl who is cheap, or will be low maintenance

[Patagonie]

My fellows RWD members have delivered to you many, many valuable pieces of information.     
   
Here is my version:1/ You were the 2nd on her list, and something happened during 3 days with a local probably (but it could be an ex-pat due to where she works)2/ you judge her; never do such a thing with a woman
3/ she took her revenge on you and cleaned you to the toilets; things went wrong with the other guy at the end of the 3 days
   
Other observations:
Don't say "I will come," shut up and go. Stop to talk and do it; better to do it rather than blabla. 
She was high on self-esteem; I agree with other members here, too much self-centered, you have to lead an upper game to cope with such type of women (most westerners don't have it due to lack of gender polarity of the western civilization). In the long term, this not necessarily the type of long-term relationship you want to have.    She was not a pro-dater AT FIRST SIGHT, BUT see my question at the end of my post.
If you don't have bought a flight ticket, avoid talking to any FSU women (sorry, I am a little brutal here, but other fellows understand what I mean). 
 
I have a question, and that question is damned important; how have you accomplished GET OUT of AnastasiaDate and calling her on her personal phone number, how did you get this phone number, and how finally have you achieved this.   
The answer could modify everything. Please give a high level of detail because I am not a magician.

[Dolmetscher007]

I've read everybody's comments, and I think all of you are really great for taking the time to give me some feedback. I have an interesting update, and then I also have a few things I'd like to add and ask.

There was something about this situation that seemed to a misunderstanding. So, I had her email address from a FaceTime video chat, so I decided to send her a really quick email, explaining how things were from my perspective. It wasn't anything dramatic or full of apologies. I just explained things from my angle, and that I wasn't trying to tell her to take a hike; I just did not understand or appreciate how flippant she seemed to be towards me. But I told her I didn't like how things ended so I wanted to at least say the things I had to say and wish her well.

Now... I'm sure I'll get at least a couple of you who'll read me the, 'Bro, just move on!' red card. But for what it's worth, I made a pact with myself years ago to always try to do my best to "end well" when it comes to things involving ladies. I don't drag things out, and I don't lose my cool over a few dates that didn't work out. But... I also don't like the idea of being in the shower, a few weeks from now and thinking... "Why didn't you at least explain how shit looked from your angle, in case it was all just a misunderstanding?"

So, I sent the email last night, and today, she unblocked me on WhatsApp, and she messaged me saying she'd read my email. She apologized for being so mysterious. She said she did not realize that some of the things she has said/done seemed like this or that to me. And we had a nice little conversation about it all. I feel better about the whole situation, and I think she does too. We used to laugh a lot before this whole dumb shit happened, so it was nice to laugh with her again. But now... I have a question for you guys.

I think I have a lot of questions about FSUW, Russian women (in particular), Russian women who live in Moscow, and to be honest, I think I might even have just a lot of questions about international dating in general. Which forum thread is the best to post random ad-hoc questions about specific interactions with a FSUW? I don't want to keep posting here in the "Scammers" forum considering I don't think this girl is a scammer. (*She might be nuts or something... we'll see... but I don't think she's a calculated con artist.)

Thanks for the input everyone! This forum is an excellent resource.

[Grumpy]

I think I have a lot of questions about FSUW, Russian women (in particular), Russian women who live in Moscow, and to be honest, I think I might even have just a lot of questions about international dating in general. Which forum thread is the best to post random ad-hoc questions about specific interactions with a FSUW? I don't want to keep posting here in the "Scammers" forum considering I don't think this girl is a scammer. (*She might be nuts or something... we'll see... but I don't think she's a calculated con artist.)

Thanks for the input everyone! This forum is an excellent resource.

You could start a thread in the "Starting Out" section for your questions. Welcome to the forum.

[Dolmetscher007]

My fellows RWD members have delivered to you many, many valuable pieces of information.     

I totally agree!

   
You judge her; never do such a thing with a woman

What do you mean exactly? Everyone uses that word "Judge" but I have never really understood it. We all judge... everything, and everyone. You read my post, and you passed a judgement. I read yours and did the same. When a woman sends me a photograph, if she looks lovely in the picture, I tell her, which is a judgement.

Do you mean, never criticize a woman? The reason I am asking you to clarify isn't because I disagree with you. I am totally willing to see where I have mistakes in my thinking. But... if a woman behaves in a way that I find disrespectful, rude, or confusing to me... how would any other man deal with that? Again... not suggesting I handled things well. I'm literally asking because I am open to learn.

   
Don't say "I will come," shut up and go. Stop to talk and do it; better to do it rather than blabla. 

This seems to be a very common theme on this forum, and it is very common on the dating websites. Almost every single woman on the FSU dating websites say at some point in their profile... "Do not waste my time, if you do not have the intention of visiting me."  This is something I can completely understand. I can also imagine that maybe as high as 50% of the men on those dating website are maybe just lonely men, who really like the idea of meeting a beautiful FSUW... but are either too shy, too poor, or too indecisive to make it happen.

On the other hand... The whole "Shut up and go. Stop talking and do it!" bit doesn't really feel right to me either, for many reasons. Russia has closed it's borders to everyone right now, just for starters.  Someone else on this forum suggested we meet in a neutral country. I like that idea a lot. However... maybe I am trying to do something that I do not have the means to do... but I cannot take a week off of work to go to Europe every time I start chatting with a pretty FSUW.  Don't get me wrong... I'm more than willing to make the trips... even if it takes 4-5 trips to meet several different ladies. I can afford the travel financially, but my position in my company does not allow me to just jet-set to Europe meeting FSUW like that. So I guess I don't have a "shut up and do it" attitude yet. If this girl (or any other girl) did really just blow me away... that might be different. But this girl has more blown me off, than away... and I'm brand new to this whole endeavor. So... I have to check my impulsivity at the gate these days, with my responsibilities.

   
She was high on self-esteem; I agree with other members here, too much self-centered, you have to lead an upper game to cope with such type of women (most westerners don't have it due to lack of gender polarity of the western civilization).

I think this is a very valid assessment. I definitely thought she seemed self-centered. But... I am very interested in what you think about the rest of what you said. For example, what do you mean by "have to lead an upper game?" In my mind, this cuts to the center of so many relationship problems in the west. I have the feeling that everyone in the West, and maybe even the whole world, for all I know... has a "self importance" problem. There seems to only be extremes. I find women who either think of themselves as absolute dolls, and a gift from heaven for any man lucky enough to "win them," or... I find women who hate themselves, and wonder why anyone would even want to be with them. And weirdly enough... the "fashion model" types, are usually more in the second camp, not the first. So my question, I suppose is... what is a man to do? If you meet a woman who you think is beautiful, fun, smart, energetic, and all that... but... you can kind of tell she is self-centered, and she doesn't really ask you about yourself or how you are doing. Do you just, recognize that as a character flaw and get away from her? Do you just accept that this is one aspect of a whole human, and you make the agreement with yourself that you understand this about her, and it's okay? Or do you bring it up, and try to discuss it and "work on it" together, with the assumption that there is most certainly something about you that she would like to address as well?
[/quote]

     
I have a question, and that question is damned important; how have you accomplished GET OUT of AnastasiaDate and calling her on her personal phone number, how did you get this phone number, and how finally have you achieved this.   
The answer could modify everything. Please give a high level of detail because I am not a magician.

I'm not so sure I understand what you mean here. I met her on RussianCupid.com. I play the guitar, and have a photograph of myself playing it in one of my profile pics. She wrote to me (first, if that is what you mean) and we talked about me playing the guitar. Since she wrote to me first, I was a little skeptical that she might be fake. So... after 1-2 days of chatting on that website, I asked her to send me a photo of herself where she's making the thumbs up sign with her hand and I can see her face. We laughed about it, and she said she'd do it, but only if I do it too. So I gave her my WhatsApp number so that she could send me that photo. She sent me a video instead, where she made the thumbs up sign, and made a joke about how she is trying to steal all my money, my cat, my car, and my furniture. (It was cute). So... that is how we started talking off that website. What does that matter?

[BillyB]

Dolmetscher007, although you crave more attention from the woman hoping she'll ask more questions about your life, she has given you a lot of attention. She spent lots of time video chatting and on the phone with you. She has sent you tons of photos of herself hoping it'll please you. This is the way she's sharing her life with you. Many guys in this endeavor don't get that kind of attention especially from a beautiful woman in demand. I'm not sure how many girls you communicated with but I doubt those girls shared their life with you more than this one.

[ML]

I asked my wife to read the first posting only because she doesn't like to waste a lot of time on these forums like I do.

Her three comments:

1) A man shouldn't expect a woman to tell her last name and where she works until after they have met and formed strong bonds.  Too risky for the woman otherwise.

2) When a woman likes to model clothes, jewelry, etc., and send pictures of such . . . they are telling you what they want you to buy for them, or send money for such.

3) If a person doesn't ask questions about your life . . . they are not really interested in you.