Interesting interview with Ukrainian wife in US

[Daveman]

I am 30 minutes into the interview and they are talking about how bad UKr men are and how bad US women are.  I cannot go for that. I dated WW all my life and not all of them were bad.  i would say that 8 or 9 out of every 10 was pretty good - real good.  For me, it was me.  i was the problem.

Absolutely agree.  You were the friggin problem...




heh!  couldn't resist.  It isn't about the lot of FSUM or WW being good or bad, it's about who we consistently attract into our lives. History tend to repeat itself. 

[GQBlues]

...I am glad you cleared up the question about whether you were an actress or shill for Mark.  People find it hard to believe that you could just 'drop in' without some ties to Mark or the MOB industry.  Regardless if Mark is a commercial member or not, it was nice of him to provide all of us the interview with you....

I realized SanBerdoo is the armpit of Kali, but it's still Kali. So, the last thing I expected to see is a Kali resident hiding behind a skirt. Pshyt happens, I suppose.

The *negative* posts wasn't about the gal. It isn't about age disparity. It was about a gal getting manipulated by a service provider and touted in front of hard-up retirees from Canada to the end-of-the-world, SanBerdoo.

I'm not even sure why the mods aren't sticking this silly thread in the service provider section where it belongs because it is nothing but a two-bit promotion of someone's service by an old-fart in his 70s with nothing to do.

...Good luck on your book.  Hanging around here you will no doubt get a lot more material.  LOL...

You see, even a blind squirrel trips over a nut now and then. I definitely can agree with that.

...Contrary to a few negative posters, my guess is that most single members would be looking for someone just like you....

Dirty old men?

 

[jone]

GQ -

You are far out on a tangent.  And Moderator, where do we allow the full naming of a member on this forum?  All such references should be removed.  Naming a member and the city he is from is against the rules.

[GQBlues]

Friends, I am listening to it (so no opinion on the chat comment/questions intercepted and interpreted).

I need to prepare myself for the arrival of the future Mrs. Jimbo.  I need to be sharp and have things in order.  I think she is ok.  He grates on me some but that is to be expected. 

I am 30 minutes into the interview and they are talking about how bad UKr men are and how bad US women are.  I cannot go for that.  I dated WW all my life and not all of them were bad.  i would say that 8 or 9 out of every 10 was pretty good - real good.  For me, it was me.  i was the problem.

The male says there is a competition between Western couples.  He's right.  There's something wrong with the culture there, but that was not an issue in the relationships I was in with the good girls.  Now when it came to the non-good women in my life, you bet the anti-man culture played a big role.

I got her blog loaded here.http://galynatate.wordpress.com/tag/galina-tate/  that i will check out, but thank you OP for posting this.  Fellow contributors, I enjoyed reading your comments

Based on that type of attitude, you should be fine. Lot's of married folks around here that can address your query for things you may like to know to make your SO's adjustment smoother.

[GQBlues]

GQ -

You are far out on a tangent.

Who's tangent, yours?

..And Moderator, where do we allow the full naming of a member on this forum?  All such references should be removed.  Naming a member and the city he is from is against the rules.

I didn't name anyone who wasn't in the link provided by the very same person on the thread AND yourself.

Pay attention next time, will you? Make things easier that way..

[jone]

What?   You take offense when someone other than your victim stands up to fight back?  You cannot name someone on here.  You did.  No one else did.  Because I can extrapolate who you are and where you live or quote you from another media source, I should reveal your name?  That is just plain wrong.

I am simply standing up for someone that you have pummeled and then named.  As for the tangent, everyone on here saw that the Op was trying to compliment the gal.  And you go off saying that he is endorsing Mark. 

GQ, I like you.  It just makes you look bad.  As did that last post.  Stop it.  It is beneath you.  I've gone off the farm before and was forced to admit it.  You do yourself a disservice.

[TheTraveler]

I personally don't like thinking of relationships between WM and FSUW as being between 53 year olds and 29 year olds.  It kinda gives me the willies. 

people who have the willies from marriages like mine and my dhrw's... give me the willies.

[TheTraveler]

Alright, quite an interesting discussion here. I am actually that gal. Thanks for nice comments! I had no idea that my thoughts on the matter would stir up so much discussion. I will try to make it clear who I am, and what all that was about...

cool.

glad you signed up, galyna!

[naigalina]

To GQBlues:
I don't know you and who you are as a human being. But you created quite a buzz around here. I believe you are so defensive/offensive/opinionated because you probably feel that your point of view has not been clearly understood. Who knows.

How old are you and what do you do for living? What makes you feel better than some of those other men? Just curious. There are should be some grounds for that. I have too options: you are either hot, fit, healthy, financially stable young man, or you are opposite from all that, and lack simple woman's attention. There might be a third option, which I don't know about.

You see, I'm new to this forum. I don't know what's a norm, and what's out of line.
I love when people share their viewpoints. I believe different opinions create a healthy environment for thinking minds. I also like constructive criticism- it helps you grow.

That been said, you can say whatever you want, just don't be so negative about people. Name calling is a sign of low moral intelligence. I also believe that your frustrations reflect your own fears.

[jone]

To GQBlues:
I don't know you and who you are as a human being. But you created quite a buzz around here. I believe you are so defensive/offensive/opinionated because you probably feel that your point of view has not been clearly understood. Who knows.

How old are you and what do you do for living? What makes you feel better than some of those other men? Just curious. There are should be some grounds for that. I have too options: you are either hot, fit, healthy, financially stable young man, or you are opposite from all that, and lack simple woman's attention. There might be a third option, which I don't know about.

You see, I'm new to this forum. I don't know what's a norm, and what's out of line.
I love when people share their viewpoints. I believe different opinions create a healthy environment for thinking minds. I also like constructive criticism- it helps you grow.

That been said, you can say whatever you want, just don't be so negative about people. Name calling is a sign of low moral intelligence. I also believe that your frustrations reflect your own fears.

RE:  GQ - He's actually a good guy.  He'll come around.   (He probably about died when you showed up here!  Hehehehe.)

As for your descriptions above, I am the Hot, Fit, Financially Stable, and, above all, MODEST young man you described.   

As to Traveler, I was being an apologist when I really didn't need to.    Am very happy you married who you did.  Wish that all men were so lucky.   But then so is your DHRW.   Izvinitye Pazhalesta!

-jon

[GQBlues]

What?   You take offense when someone other than your victim stands up to fight back?  You cannot name someone on here.  You did.  No one else did.  Because I can extrapolate who you are and where you live or quote you from another media source, I should reveal your name?  That is just plain wrong.

Weak. I'm never offended nor is there any freakin' victim here, jone. Your feminine side is glaringly showing.

It was 'you' who called him 'Doug', and he already mentioned he lived in the armpit of Kali before. so reading the link's transcribe which 'he' provided, then spotting the proverbial *LOL* that follows every sentence...then it's just a question of connecting the dots.

Being a Kali boy, I thought you'd be a bit more sharper than this...but then again, I was wrong about our lil ol' Dougie, too.

...I am simply standing up for someone that you have pummeled and then named.

*Pummeled* and *named*, jone? It's a beautiful Sunday in SoCal to be casting incredibly dramatic innuendos, man. What's up with that? Sheessh...climb me a mountain, Matilda!

... As for the tangent, everyone on here saw that the Op was trying to compliment the gal.  And you go off saying that he is endorsing Mark.

Gets duller with every post. If lil ol' Dougie wanted to compliment the gal, post her blog. Don't be posting a service provider's venue. If he wants to do what he did, then post that cheap link in the SERVICE PROVIDER'S SECTION like the site expects every service provider to do. Is this too complicated for YOU to understand, jone?

...GQ, I like you.  It just makes you look bad.  As did that last post.  Stop it.  It is beneath you.  I've gone off the farm before and was forced to admit it.  You do yourself a disservice...

Makes me look bad? I don't mind being bad. You, however, curiously side-stepped my question. Mark and his wife Anna gives you the willies because of their age disparity. Will you also please, on record since we have Galina involved in this thread, tell her to her face she and her husband also gives you the willies (might need to elaborate with her what that means) because they, like Mark and Anna, represent something YOU simply do not personally like. Tell her why you believe that to be wrong, jone.

Don't be donning any suit of armor trying to dress yourself up something you're not. It just makes you look like a silly two-face court jester.

Now go out there and enjoy your Sunday. 49ers by 10.

[jone]

You Sir Are Absolutely Wrong!

Being a Green Bay fan I have the Ravens by a TD.

As for naming our great state Kali - well you and Arnold are barking up the wrong tree.

And speaking of Armpits, isn't Visalia and Stevenson Ranch and all surrounding areas simply subdivisions of Sylmar?

Now, having said all of that, I have to adjust my Tutu.  I'm doing a ballet this afternoon.

[GQBlues]

To GQBlues:
I don't know you and who you are as a human being. But you created quite a buzz around here. I believe you are so defensive/offensive/opinionated because you probably feel that your point of view has not been clearly understood. Who knows.

How old are you and what do you do for living? What makes you feel better than some of those other men? Just curious. There are should be some grounds for that. I have too options: you are either hot, fit, healthy, financially stable young man, or you are opposite from all that, and lack simple woman's attention. There might be a third option, which I don't know about.

You see, I'm new to this forum. I don't know what's a norm, and what's out of line.
I love when people share their viewpoints. I believe different opinions create a healthy environment for thinking minds. I also like constructive criticism- it helps you grow.

That been said, you can say whatever you want, just don't be so negative about people. Name calling is a sign of low moral intelligence. I also believe that your frustrations reflect your own fears.

Welcome to the site, Galina.

You seem smart enough to be able to figure all this out sooner than later. The thread is NOT about you, nor decisions you made in your life. If you objectively read the thread carefully, you'd likely get a better idea.


I wasn't calling anyone names. Doug IS an old fart. That's a fact. If he isn't already in his 70s, he's knocking that proverbial time barrier - LOUDLY. Muscle control et al had  long since departed. Heck, when I get to my 70s, I'd be an old fart like lil Dougie.


As for the reverse psychology, no dice. For some reason, it just never worked with me. Few died trying though. Frustration, I think.

I've no time to read your blog though. Too nice a day right now and wifey and I have engagements to attend to today.

[GQBlues]

You Sir Are Absolutely Wrong!

Being a Green Bay fan I have the Ravens by a TD.

So that's where you get your dramatics from. Sir Drama King himself - Brett Favre.

..As for naming our great state Kali - well you and Arnold are barking up the wrong tree...

What's Palmer got to do with this?

...And speaking of Armpits, isn't Visalia and Stevenson Ranch and all surrounding areas simply subdivisions of Sylmar?...

Visalia / Stevenson Ranch / all surround areas - subdivisions of Sylmar?  You may as well toss in Stockton, SF, SB, Bakersfield, Delano and OC as surrounding areas if you're going to be that ambiguous.

...Now, having said all of that, I have to adjust my Tutu.  I'm doing a ballet this afternoon...

There you go...that's more like it.

[naigalina]

GQ:
Thanks for welcoming me here!

I don't have to prove my point here. And I am not going to! I'm not here to promote my blog either, or anything else. No commercial interest! And I'm not here to impress anyone. Pure curiosity.

You can disagree with everyone here and in the whole world- just be cool about it. Think about this: why does it still bother you so much what other people do?! How does it affect your life? Answer this question yourself. And then let it go!

[jone]

GQ:
Thanks for welcoming me here!

I don't have to prove my point here. And I am not going to! I'm not here to promote my blog either, or anything else. No commercial interest! And I'm not here to impress anyone. Pure curiosity.

You can disagree with everyone here and in the whole world- just be cool about it. Think about this: why does it still bother you so much what other people do?! How does it affect your life? Answer this question yourself. And then let it go!

He's just in a foul mood.  Have you seen the Lakers this year?

[TheTraveler]

As to Traveler, I was being an apologist when I really didn't need to.    Am very happy you married who you did.  Wish that all men were so lucky.   But then so is your DHRW.   Izvinitye Pazhalesta!

glad you don't really have the willies!
 
peace, my brother!
 

[TomT]

I'm not even sure why the mods aren't sticking this silly thread in the service provider section where it belongs because it is nothing but a two-bit promotion of someone's service by an old-fart in his 70s with nothing to do.

What a terrible thing to write! You'll be an old fart in your 70s someday. Of course, I'll get there long before you will. 
Personally, I thought that the interview was a hoot, especially the part about age being just "a passport number." (It must have been a Freudian slip...) As you know, age is as huge as girth (pun intended), sobriety, mental health and physical performance. Of course, the guys who fail on every count love to hear otherwise.
p.s.
Wassamatta Matt? You've been in the search for two years and haven't gotten lucky yet? 

[naigalina]

My personal perspective on age difference and other stuff:

I was very judgmental years ago about age difference, especially between WM and Ukrainian women. I believed that it was like this: men wanted young bodies, and girls wanted $$. I was also brain washed by anti-American propaganda. So, when my former classmate asked me to create a profile (as part of her new inventory for her dating website), I first refused. I thought that all American men were as they say "fat, dumb, and happy", and there would be nothing for me- a well-educated girl- to talk to them about.
She kept asking me to help her with her new business in the area. She said that it wouldn't take any of my time (I worked 11 hrs/day for a FOREX broker company, and was quite busy), that she would respond to most letters for me. 
Within the first month I received the letter from my husband. I didn't show any interest first. When he came later to my city to see me (he was in Ukraine, driving his car, and he was going to that city anyway), I didn't want to meet him. So, my sort of friend from the agency called him and left a message supposedly from me, to call me back.
I would have never called him on my own, because I wasn't interested in any older man with American passport. I had enough attention in my area. But I wasn't interested in a relationship at the moment. I wanted a career. And I never wanted to leave Ukraine.
We eventually met. I told him straightforward that we couldn't have a relationship because he was "too old, too big, and too American." I could only be his translator and guide.
And then, after some time, I realized that like anyone else he fit into my long list of expectations for men. I can say that I was always quite selective and was very demanding.
Age difference was a big No for me for a long time. Before I met Him, I thought that even 7 years of difference would be a Big stretch for me. I didn't consider Him to be my potential husband. He didn't want to get married either. We just had a great time together, and enjoyed our adventures. He had his list of demands, I had mine, and miraculously we fit each other’s profile very well. We fell in love, and the rest became history.
I noticed that sometimes I couldn't keep up with his energy. I still wonder at times who's younger. But that's just him. He's not typical of any nationality or any stereotype.
Now, years later, I feel how wrong I was in my silly judgments. How immature my thinking was. How limited my visions were. I thought that 40 yr old guys were almost dead. Shame on me.
People tend to choose the ones who are similar to them. And sometimes souls unite through ages and distances apart. It happens. My point is that if you truly fall in love, age difference shouldn't be a deal breaker. Though, I always advice to go for a reasonable age difference.
I always say, there should be some common sense with any choice you make.
I believe that there are good men in Ukraine (though, a lot of them are challenged, it's true), and there are some good men in the U.S. As well as some creepy ones. People are different, no matter where you live. Same goes to women. Yes, I heard unpleasant things about American women, but I have also met some great women in America too. Let me tell you, there are women in FSUC that are far from the charming stereotype. There are princesses all over the world. So, be careful if you choose one. It all depends on what you are looking for, and what you want long term. I always advice people to be realistic about themselves and others. And I believe that everyone should do what works for them.
Don’t limit yourself to some immature ideas and stereotypes. We are responsible for our own happiness, and it’s nobody’s business how we do it.

I believe in people, not stereotypes. That's how I feel about age, nationality, culture, etc.


I hope this will help some of you understand how some women in Ukraine think.

[Brillynt]

That is a very nice story. 

[Gator]

These days I don't read all the threads, and I assume  some of the bantering is carryover from spirited discussions elsewhere at RWD. 
 
I clicked on the link and skipped about for about 10 minutes.  The chat seemed genuine.      I guess GQ  believes it is nothing more than agency marketing.   
 
IMO the chat should be helpful to newbies who are at the initial stage of trying to obtain  information about FSU life, dating FSUW, living with a FSUW, etc.   And what better source than a UW who has married an AM and moved to America. Galina's English is excellent and that is very helpful.   
 
Is it balanced?  How could it be given that Galina is happily married and has a positive attitude.  The point I guess GQ is trying to make is that such chats can prompt newbies to pursue large age disparities.   In my 10 minutes of scanning the chat, I heard very little about age gaps other than Galina saying not all UW and not all parents are comfortable with a large age difference.  [And I see she has now written a response about age differences.]
 
At RWD we try to add balance to expressed viewpoints.  GQ made a sweeping assumption without facts about Mark's clients and chat membership.   If GQ insists on journalistic balance, I suggest that he choose particular points made by Galina and offer a counterpoint.   Other options:  Galina could return for a second chat when she is in a bad mood.  Or maybe Mark should have a chat with Antidate members?  Or maybe GQ could find a bitter FSUW for one of Mark's chats.   
 
Overall, I commend Mark for the chat.  The only thing that made me flinch is the shirt Mark wore.    What's the story Mark?  Are those two Christian crosses?  Further proof that we are all different   Mark,  you can make fun of me by selecting something from Brooks Brothers. 
 
 

[Shadow]

The people who should not limit them selves are the women.
From what you write it seems that you met through a dating site that writes for you, and your husband got lucky you actually decided to meet.

I do not judge age differences as I feel that within relationships anything is possible. However to let men believe that any woman will come around to them if the man just continues to pursue her is not just misleading, it can be outright dangerous.

Most of the negative reports, both about women scamming and about men stalking, come from the behaviour that men do not wish to give up a lost cause.

[naigalina]

I have seen some men date for months, years, hold hands and hope things would move along somehow. In Ukraine, women rarely take initiative. So if you wait for her to come around and make the first step, you will be tomorrow where you are today. That was my point. No point banging on the doors that are shut specifically not to let you in.

About the agency writing:

I ended up writing 90% of the letters. But later I did discover that they were tweaked by the agency. Where I said that I didn't have time for a meeting or a vacation, they put "oh, I would be happy to see you soon in my city."

I probably would have never met my husband if not for my former classmate (who worked for the agency.) I'm glad I saw beyond my self imposed stereotypes.
Living with Him, traveling to more than 20 countries, seeing many couples, men, women, and being in different environments has helped me understand how I was wrong 7 years ago.

I believe if the feeling and intentions are mutual- green light, as long as it's a win-win situation for everyone involved; as long as you are realistic about what you can offer and what you will get in return. But that is true about people of all the ages and differences.

[ML]

About the agency writing:

I ended up writing 90% of the letters. But later I did discover that they were tweaked by the agency. Where I said that I didn't have time for a meeting or a vacation, they put "oh, I would be happy to see you soon in my city."

Hi Galyna:

You mentioned somewhere that a friend of yours talked you into posting a profile to help her business get started.  And you mentioned that she or someone on her staff replied to the letters that men sent to your profile.

Now you further note that the agency changed some of the letters that you wrote yourself.

Question:  Are you now still friends with these people who were (and probably still are) running a scam operation?  i.e. Communicating with men under false pretenses with money involved.

And if yes; how do you justify this to yourself?

And what does your husband think of your friends still running a scam operation?

Don't just sugar coat the situation that developed between you and your husband; I am addressing the larger situation your agency friends are involved in.

Note:  Do  you want your name spelled Russian as Galina or Ukrainian as Galyna?

[Patagonie]

My personal perspective on age difference and other stuff:

I was very judgmental years ago about age difference, especially between WM and Ukrainian women. I believed that it was like this: men wanted young bodies, and girls wanted $$. I was also brain washed by anti-American propaganda. So, when my former classmate asked me to create a profile (as part of her new inventory for her dating website), I first refused. I thought that all American men were as they say "fat, dumb, and happy", and there would be nothing for me- a well-educated girl- to talk to them about.
She kept asking me to help her with her new business in the area. She said that it wouldn't take any of my time (I worked 11 hrs/day for a FOREX broker company, and was quite busy), that she would respond to most letters for me. 
Within the first month I received the letter from my husband. I didn't show any interest first. When he came later to my city to see me (he was in Ukraine, driving his car, and he was going to that city anyway), I didn't want to meet him. So, my sort of friend from the agency called him and left a message supposedly from me, to call me back.
I would have never called him on my own, because I wasn't interested in any older man with American passport. I had enough attention in my area. But I wasn't interested in a relationship at the moment. I wanted a career. And I never wanted to leave Ukraine.
We eventually met. I told him straightforward that we couldn't have a relationship because he was "too old, too big, and too American." I could only be his translator and guide.
And then, after some time, I realized that like anyone else he fit into my long list of expectations for men. I can say that I was always quite selective and was very demanding.
Age difference was a big No for me for a long time. Before I met Him, I thought that even 7 years of difference would be a Big stretch for me. I didn't consider Him to be my potential husband. He didn't want to get married either. We just had a great time together, and enjoyed our adventures. He had his list of demands, I had mine, and miraculously we fit each other’s profile very well. We fell in love, and the rest became history.
I noticed that sometimes I couldn't keep up with his energy. I still wonder at times who's younger. But that's just him. He's not typical of any nationality or any stereotype.
Now, years later, I feel how wrong I was in my silly judgments. How immature my thinking was. How limited my visions were. I thought that 40 yr old guys were almost dead. Shame on me.
People tend to choose the ones who are similar to them. And sometimes souls unite through ages and distances apart. It happens. My point is that if you truly fall in love, age difference shouldn't be a deal breaker. Though, I always advice to go for a reasonable age difference.
I always say, there should be some common sense with any choice you make.
I believe that there are good men in Ukraine (though, a lot of them are challenged, it's true), and there are some good men in the U.S. As well as some creepy ones. People are different, no matter where you live. Same goes to women. Yes, I heard unpleasant things about American women, but I have also met some great women in America too. Let me tell you, there are women in FSUC that are far from the charming stereotype. There are princesses all over the world. So, be careful if you choose one. It all depends on what you are looking for, and what you want long term. I always advice people to be realistic about themselves and others. And I believe that everyone should do what works for them.
Don’t limit yourself to some immature ideas and stereotypes. We are responsible for our own happiness, and it’s nobody’s business how we do it.

I believe in people, not stereotypes. That's how I feel about age, nationality, culture, etc.


I hope this will help some of you understand how some women in Ukraine think.

I think my girl might write barely the same story as you (need to be continued).
If you had attraction, good standards, compatibility, respect, take your time during the dating stage, good health, true love you should get the cocktail you have today.