new to RWD, married to AM for 24 years, trying to match make for my young friend

[olgac]

Childcare seriously eats into any income she would make AND you have strangers raising
your children. Children to be around people who LOVE them.

Your mentee, doesn't need a weak man who lacks confidence. If he doesn't think he can
make it in Reno, where will he ever succeed? Your girl needs to be able to articulate her
point(s) but if he can't see them together as a family then he might not be worth
additional efforts.

Tell your girl to NOT ASSUME that the guy knows anything. Walk him through it step by
step, detail by detail about what needs to happen to keep going down the path for
success as a man and for a family. She can start contributing to college funds
and retirements plans part time once the kids go to school.

Well for her this is like leading a man. She wants a man who would take an initiative in everything. She has the talk about future with men and they do want a family but so far nobody wanted a SAHM

Yes childcare eats into woman's earnings but it all depends on how much she earns. My friend earns much more than it would cost even for a nanny let alone child care.
Also my friend wants maybe 2 kids max. and there are just a few years of a woman's life that she is actually taking care of babies and toddlers.
If a woman has a good job, a family can save money for those few years and she can even stay home. I think the main problem is that this generation of men are not as comfortable financially as previous generations. The living standards in US have really came down even during the time I was here.

[ML]

Olga, In the 1939 movie, The Wizard of Oz, Dorothy says the famous line to her dog at one point, “Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.”

It's a phrase that has come to mean that we have entered a place or circumstance that is unfamiliar and uncomfortable.

This applies to your friend.  Either she adapts to the reality of circumstances here in the USA . . . or she suffers.

[krimster2]

really...
to me she sounds like an empty person
who is looking for a permanent meal ticket that doesn't involve her own labor
and will try to hold out "for the maximum offer" which is NEVER gonna come...
so when she gets older and is losing her "marketability"
she'll settle for someone less, but will feel resentful towards him

in other words, it's be MUCH better to be GAY than to put ANY TIME into a relationship with someone like her
and THIS IS WHY guys turn GAY, cuz they are so sick of mercenaries

OTOH, lots and lots and lots of single 30+ somethings in Ukraine, they're freakin everywhere
and these women are HORNY as hell, haven't had sex in years

first become friends
then friends with benefits
let them sleep-over in your t-shirts
cook meals and feed them

it all feels very natural in Ukraine
no big thinking involved

and the women...
would chase YOU
you let the sweet tempered pretty ones catch you, and run from the weird freaky ones who wanna tie you up and stuff

simple...

[olgac]

Yesterday she sent me this video where a Russian woman is interviewing her American husband on what men are looking for in a woman. The guy is for sure older than 45. And he is saying that for him it doesn't matter if she woman is working or how much she makes, but he adds that of course if the man is making ONLY 100K then he can't support a family comfortably and such a man might not care if a woman makes less than him but he does want her to work and contribute financially. (he also said such guys probably marry women who are not as young, not as beautiful and perhaps single mothers)



BTW if You listen to the end he also says that it's a good thing his RW was already in US legally because bringing someone over or legalizing someone is too big of a risk due to signing an affidavid of support.

I told my friend that this is a kind of men she should be looking for, but she said he is way too old for her.
I liked the video a RW is asking very good questions. It has russian subtitles but mostly in English.

PS: in comments she says they have a prenup

[ML]

PS: in comments she says they have a prenup

My Ukrainian wife asked me why I didn't require a prenup.

I said when I was younger, I might have.

But now I have been almost everywhere, I have seen it all, I have done it all, I have been with scores of women, my descendants are well taken care of . . .  so now I could be OK living in a small cabin on the side of a mountain with very little money.

So if I lost most everything . . . wouldn't be traumatic for me.

[ML]

The guy in the video says women never share their money, so no need to worry if they are making money.

Mostly the FSUW didn't have any money to share anyway.

However I was surprised and felt bad when a few of them came to my apartment on subsequent dates bringing large quantities of food they had just bought at grocery.  Bringing an item they cooked at home is one thing, but bags of purchased food is another.  I never raised a big fuss about it because I knew it was a sense of pride for them to do this.

My Ukrainian wife is probably quite an exception as she wants to share all her money, buys me stuff and now is wanting to buy me a new car/truck.

But I tell her not to because I only put less than 1,000 miles on my truck a year anyway, so a new truck would simply sit and depreciate.

Some day soon however, we might have to both buy new vehicles as repair bills are starting to add up.  She is pushing for electric or hybrid.

[olgac]

Yes not all FSU women think that my money is mine and yours is ours even though I remember when I was on RW forum we often argued about it.
I of course also don't think that my money is only mine.

In the comments to this video one RW says that she is about to marry an american she met online and that she knows he doesn't make much and doesn't have much savings but he is a great man, she loves him and she is willing to work when she comes here.

Of course other women reply that why do You need such an american, you can work in your own country.

The guy in a video is pretty harsh on men making 100K or less and if a man makes 50K he says it's basically poverty.
He says a good provider has to make at least 200K. And You guys were criticizing my friend's requirements of a 150K
This video is made for RW seeking a western man so soon they will all have such requirements He is an orthopedic surgeon BTW

I think though her requirements are now shifting. She yesterday mentioned at least 120K K and I think she is beginning to accept she might have to contribute financially.

[krimster2]

people in the Soviet Union NEVER EXPECTED the Soviet Union to collapse....
but guess what happened
and guess what's gonna happen in the USA in the 2030s....
SAME THING!!!!

when that happens YOU better not come into my neighborhood to collect aluminum cans (if there are any)
cuz I'll fight you for those cans, and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna win

the easy life she yearns for is NOT going to exist in the future due to a global financial collapse
if she doesn't contribute according to her ability, then she can beg on the empty interstate
cuz sure as hell, no one is gonna waste time "taking care of her"
why would they?
they think the same way she does, they think they can find someone better, so they will....
what goes 'round, comes 'round
what a suka karma is

[Lily]

Yesterday she sent me this video where a Russian woman is interviewing her American husband on what men are looking for in a woman. The guy is for sure older than 45. And he is saying that for him it doesn't matter if she woman is working or how much she makes, but he adds that of course if the man is making ONLY 100K then he can't support a family comfortably and such a man might not care if a woman makes less than him but he does want her to work and contribute financially. (he also said such guys probably marry women who are not as young, not as beautiful and perhaps single mothers)



BTW if You listen to the end he also says that it's a good thing his RW was already in US legally because bringing someone over or legalizing someone is too big of a risk due to signing an affidavid of support.

I told my friend that this is a kind of men she should be looking for, but she said he is way too old for her.
I liked the video a RW is asking very good questions. It has russian subtitles but mostly in English.

PS: in comments she says they have a prenup

Also watching this channel from time to time.


Peter (Vera's husband) is about 57 y.o. Vera is about 20 years younger than him.


The age difference would be a trade off - she brings relative youth, beauty, family values. He brings good income, and cares for the family.

[olgac]

Would You marry a man 20 years older, Lily? Or are You already married?

[Lily]

Would You marry a man 20 years older, Lily? Or are You already married?

I would not want to.


But show me the man first, and then I might be able to tell if I would

[olgac]

I think I could have when I was young if he was a very distinguished, respectable, highly intelligent man
I also used to be in a lot of outdoor activities when I was in my 20s and early 30s like backpacking, rock climbing etc
And they man would have had to be very fit and experienced in all the above, like my husband was when we met.
But hard to say right now. My husband is 9 years older than me BTW

[ML]

I think I would marry the guy in the video.

He makes over $200K and as orthopedic surgeon he could probably help with my hip pains.

- - - -

Related humor:

My friend gets good meals, has a place to sleep for free, can read 2-3 books a week and has people wanting to have sex with him all the time.



But still he complains that he doesn't like it in prison.

[olgac]

Related humor:

My friend gets good meals, has a place to sleep for free, can read 2-3 books a week and has people wanting to have sex with him all the time.

But still he complains that he doesn't like it in prison.

[krimster2]

what do you call a woman who trades sex for money?
does it matter if she has just one primary customer or a 100 irregular ones?
it's still a "transaction"
and there will ALWAYS be some of that "buyer's remorse" on both sides of that deal

just so yur clear...
this ain't EROS, or erotic love people, it has NOTHING to do with LOVE (just love of money)
she's lookin for love in all the wrong places, and in all the wrong ways
and that's why it's SO HARD for her to find it
because she's confused EROS for love of money

what she SHOULD be looking for is someone she can phuque
and not someone she can phuque out of money
once you have a phuque-mate, then you can figure out how to make money together
a husband/wife limmited liability partnership is a great way to launder cash
or so I've read....

if you really want to experience pure LOVE
you should start out "small", get a cat, or a dawg, even a squirrel you capture in the back yard would work (I did it!)
and then work your way up to a human, and get one of them (I got me one of them to!)

in about 10 more years
women will be replaced by Virtual AI Girlfriends that display in your virtual reality headset
and supplemented by Home Meal Delivery by Robot Taxis

women will all be field and factory workers living in a giant worker dormitory
population will drop due to almost zero birth rate
men will be either soldiers, cops, maintenance workers, or unemployed with a handful of AI System Analysysts and Mafiya types

in one more generation, Boomer life style will disappear for most of the population
they'll be GLAD for WWIII!!!!
until the EMP hits
and no more Facebook, TikTok, etc

bottom line, a lot of cognitive dissonance between "erotic love" and "the love of wealth"
single people are single, because of the confusing contradictions in their head conflict with reality
so they decide to never decide
and live with at least one cat (and vet bills)

PS
In America, I am referred to as a "Dairy Psychiatrist" someone who home distributes both dairy products and psychiatric outpatient services as a cost saving benefit for both
however, in the UK they are known as Milkman Psychiatrits
here they are documented on BBC TV

[Boethius]

people in the Soviet Union NEVER EXPECTED the Soviet Union to collapse....

Some people did.  The better half told me in September 1990 that the USSR would collapse within a year.

[krimster2]

majority of people think their reality can never change...
until they wake up one morning, and find out that it did

the USA and other western economies will not be an exception to this
when the excrement hits the reciprocating cooling device at the end of the next decade

I don't really know what's gonna happen when it collapses, just that it's gonna collapse
will it lead to a new dark age, like the fall of Rome
or will we "build back better" like we did after the depression and WWII

ya jes naya
I ain't got no numbers on that to tell...

[Boethius]

Perhaps.


The biggest problem in North America is income disparity.  I think a lot of problems (crumbling infrastructure, for one) can be solved with more representative taxation. 

[krimster2]

careful BO, your post could be deleted for violating the TOS, and for pseudo-marxism....