He may have turned her off by saying something that really upset her. He may have been saying things over time which made her realize he's not right for her. She may have found another guy who's better.
All is fair in love and war. Doesn't really matter what her reasons are.
...He needs to move on. He's young and will get over it. Next!
It’s called ghosting. Happens here as well.
it would be nice for him to know so that he doesn't make the same mistake(s) again. It's probably happened to most (all?) of us at some stage, although not necessarily with someone you've actually met, and it's pretty frustrating to be dumped without being told (or being able to figure out) why.
it seems rude to simply drop off the face of the earth (barring any truly egregious actions on the part of the man).
Hard for the girl to be nice to him when the guy is getting dumped.
When dumping a girl, I tell them I'm glad to have met them but we are different people and I need to move in a different direction. Explaining their faults or differences may lead to arguments. We're adults, we're supposed to fix our own issues without having to be told.
You want to see how ugly people can get? Dump them. Girls don't want to see ugly. Disappearing is one way to avoid ugly. Some of these girls know their man doesn't take "no" for an answer or they'll plead and cry for the woman to stay in a relationship.
Cutting off communication with someone, whether in social or business situations, without any explanation is just plain rude. But this is a norm for FSU folks.
Anyone have this experience where a Russian woman you are dating suddenly cuts off all contact for no apparent reason?
I'm talking about a woman that you've actually seen in person, dated a few times or more, or even a girlfriend.
An expat buddy just recounted a story where his Russian gf suddenly broke off things, blocked all forms of communication and gave him the cold shoulder. Now I don't know how long they were going out but this really shook him up. Came outta left field.
He's late 20's so I assume the girl was around his age.
I've had the occasional girl stop messaging after a few dates or turn cold. But nothing this drastic with a girlfriend.
guys this was his girlfriend !!!
guys this was his girlfriend !!! Not some random hookup or someone who he had a few dates with. And he was saying that they both liked each other and then did a complete 180 turn around.
I didn't ask for all the details but he was quite distraught. Seemed like very cold and rude behaviour, could be just youth.
Now one rather famous story about dumping is Rory McIlroy the golfer. He was engaged to a tennis player Caroline W... I think a few days before the wedding he called and cancelled it all off!
Anyone have this experience where a Russian woman you are dating suddenly cuts off all contact for no apparent reason?
guys this was his girlfriend !!!
Golden opportunity to snag another babe.
FSUW treat a prospective man with all kinds of affection,Exactly.
right up to the point that they stop. Then they treat them
like an old tuna fish sandwich found under the couch.
I've dated 2 FSU women who cut communication with me out of anger.
Anyone have this experience where a Russian woman you are dating suddenly cuts off all contact for no apparent reason?
I'm talking about a woman that you've actually seen in person, dated a few times or more, or even a girlfriend.
An expat buddy just recounted a story where his Russian gf suddenly broke off things, blocked all forms of communication and gave him the cold shoulder. Now I don't know how long they were going out but this really shook him up. Came outta left field.
He's late 20's so I assume the girl was around his age.
I've had the occasional girl stop messaging after a few dates or turn cold. But nothing this drastic with a girlfriend.
guys this was his girlfriend !!! Not some random hookup or someone who he had a few dates with. And he was saying that they both liked each other and then did a complete 180 turn around.
I didn't ask for all the details but he was quite distraught. Seemed like very cold and rude behaviour, could be just youth.
Now one rather famous story about dumping is Rory McIlroy the golfer. He was engaged to a tennis player Caroline W... I think a few days before the wedding he called and cancelled it all off!
I've dated 2 FSU women who cut communication with me out of anger. Both eventually came back after a little a$$ kissing :rolleyes:. You should try to get some more details Sting, would make it much easier to figure out.
You knew they were angry, correct?
From what I can tell this wasn't out of anger. His version was that she told him she had strong feelings for him, but his were stronger and therefore they can't be together. Very messed up logic. Then she cut off all contact.
That's what makes it unusual. It doesn't seem like she was mad, on the contrary.
The moniker "girlfriend" might include a presumption to social interaction between the afore mentioned (former) couple and a wider circle of friends, acquaintances and maybe even family.
Has there been no enlightenment from anyone mutually acquainted as to cause?
Brass
Well that's not exactly out of the blue, Sting.
It's not much of an explanation but she is breaking up with him ..."therefore they can't be together"...
Billy's right, your buddy needs to move on.
Brass
From what I can tell this wasn't out of anger. His version was that she told him she had strong feelings for him, but his were stronger and therefore they can't be together. Very messed up logic. Then she cut off all contact.
That's what makes it unusual. It doesn't seem like she was mad, on the contrary.
Brass, I don't want to pry into his private life and ask what his mutual acquaintances think. All I know is that he said they had strong feelings for each other and she suddenly ended it. His exact words to me were "She is f**king stupid.".. So obviously he was hurt.
Well that's not exactly out of the blue, Sting.
His exact words to me were "She is f**king stupid."
Who wants to be around ugly?
you arn't exactly pretty
Same for me lol.
Now of course there are people in every country of the world who are rude in this category of failure to respond to on-going communication.
But in my experience, the FSU folks (men, women, social, business) are the leaders, hands-down.
Her words mean little.
Her actions are what count.
I'm just not convinced that any person, regardless of nationality or culture, who had invested 'some deeper level of emotion' towards another, could just all of the sudden erased that reality with that particular person and/or object of affection without a word. Could be the OP's character player is so void of his inamorata's feelings that he's just clueless altogether.
I can't imagine any woman, IME, who was smitten enough with anyone on Wednesday to Monday and simply discard it Tuesday like it never happened.
Big gap missing in this scenario.
If she has feelings for him why would she dump him.
Your friend should spend one day feeling sorry for himself,
then give himself a pep talk, then move on and find an
even better girl. Girls are just like buses, there is always
another one arriving shortly. The best way to get over a
girl is in the arms of another.
Solid gold advice.
Solid gold advice.
Hmm, But IS it ?
Falling in love with someone isn't always sensible and it's loss is not simply 'cured' by hopping on another bus.... Those that think so ( I believe ) are trying to come across as 'manly' and simply aren't being honest with themselves and ( to me) saying, "Look what a ( clueless) idiot I am"...
They are both young, they weren't married or had kids and it didn't work
out. He can spend lots of time being angry, disappointed and such or he
can shake it off and move on. I suggest shaking it off and moving on,
what would you suggest?
...
If you genuinely have strong feeling for someone - they don't disappear overnight
LMAO!
He didn't disappear. She did. Hello?!?
I know you gotta be getting the clue by now considering your statement above.
Hmm... 'they' referred to the person breaking off contact ... :coffeeread:
I know you were simply inattentive - what is it with N.America, today- write first, read later ? :) ))
LMAO! ...and you're here doling out dating advice? I'll stack my 'social history' over yours, man. Any day that ends on a 'y'.
He can ponder something as random as a woman's heart for eternity.
Sure he may have made mistakes, and some introspection can help in future relationships if that's the case.
Or she could have simply had a change of heart over him being her entire future man,met another man, sneezed three times in a row, or a million other things not directly related to some character flaw he may not even have.
Best to not even think about it and move on.
If anything he could reflect on why he dint read her better prior, because i agree with GQ, that there were some clues prior to a *you have stronger felling than I do talk.*
She had felt like that a bit,if not all along, is most likely the case.
Oh dear, you've gone from bad to worse ...
I'm discussing use of the English language and paying attention to what is written - which you clearly [ still ] haven't ...
Gotta agree 100%. Business wise many Russians have little courtesy. I've had job interviews where they don't bother to tell you if you got the job or not. One time I was offered a job, started the visa process but the letter of invitation never came. I e-mailed them a few times, got no response and figured they just changed their mind. Rude but typical behaviour.
Trench, FSU families / friends are generally very close.They watch out for each other, in all aspects. it's not completely an *It's all me * centered society.
Soviet likely molded it more into a * closer ,tighter, circle of trust* and a general distrust of anyone outside of that small circle.
I think in some cases it carries past into to things like life experiences or items.
If it's outside their experience, it's initially distrusted, or bad, until proven otherwise.
As far as building relationships, if you arnt in that circle, you are evaluated carefully until you are in it.
If you show any signs of not being trustworthy ,or someone to have a future with, you're out.Normally quite swiftly and cleanly , no fuss, no muss,and there is no reason to explain anything.
Regardless they are generally very hospitable and polite to any guest.
Also, a Russian man would have not had a second thought regarding this girl or her actions.
Granted thats all a bunch of generalities, that mean nothing when dealing with any given individual.
Trench, FSU families / friends are generally very close.They watch out for each other, in all aspects. it's not completely an *It's all me * centered society.
Soviet likely molded it more into a * closer ,tighter, circle of trust* and a general distrust of anyone outside of that small circle.
I think in some cases it carries past into to things like life experiences or items.
If it's outside their experience, it's initially distrusted, or bad, until proven otherwise.
As far as building relationships, if you arnt in that circle, you are evaluated carefully until you are in it.
If you show any signs of not being trustworthy ,or someone to have a future with, you're out.Normally quite swiftly and cleanly , no fuss, no muss,and there is no reason to explain anything.
Regardless they are generally very hospitable and polite to any guest.
Also, a Russian man would have not had a second thought regarding this girl or her actions.
Granted thats all a bunch of generalities, that mean nothing when dealing with any given individual.
Admittedly I think you may be right on this. I think there is also an aspect of FSU society that once a man or woman know what they want it's decided and then that is the time for action. Perhaps she decided to move in another direction away from a relationship.
Certainly, I think it is true that it's imperative to get access to her inner personal life. I think that may have been the guy's problem here. It's something I failed to do with the last girl I met and like you say until you don't hold any special place with her and are on the outside. Being on the outside is not a good place to be for long as I think it tends to be bad for the relationship. I think no matter what you do if she does not give you access to her inner personal life you're screwed and it will not end well.
I think opening up about your personal life is probably the best thing to do as it works both ways. I think if your secretive then she is likely to be likewise. Again it's something I should have focused on more with the last girl and will do in future I think. As I found last time being on the outside is not a good place to be.
(http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/eb/ebf13bef0cd380cff07c4797ae7486994af1597d449be583dbc4c99a8848b192.jpg)
Brass
she took a trait of a RW and took the high road out of the relationship and ended it with no explanation as to why.That was not the high road; it was the low road.
All I can go by is his story and what he told me. If she has feelings for him why would she dump him. I know him in a business setting, he's a pretty straight forward, honest guy. No character issues but then I don't know how he is in his relationship.
She could be a cold, calculating woman with no regard for him or just a naive youth. I was trying to figure out if it's more a cultural or age thing or just an anomaly.
That was not the high road; it was the low road.
Seems you are starting to think like a Russian.
Further, there is no need to explain why.
There is no need to get into back and forth arguments about the ending.
The only thing required for decency is to reply to correspondence from another person (once only) and tell that you do not intend to continue the correspondence/relationship.
Staying within your context, bottom line is I hope your buddy finds the fortitude to wash all these off and get on with life. The sooner the better. Put away the Air Supply Greatest Hits CD as Smooth Operator will always say. At his age, there'll be plenty more social excursions of the type so best he start honing his skills now to better prepare for his future.
As for projecting a person's character unto everything in his life, one of my buddy is actively in contention in UFC. The dude is one bad-arse m'fcker. But you wouldn't find a sappier pussy whip when it comes to women. There's plenty of the type out there in our midst. Strange beasts we men are, just as our female counterparts are, except they're more sinister than we can ever hope to be.
As for the inquiry in your last statement, I belong in the camp of *women are women the world over* when all is said and done, and I'm talking straight from direct experience. I would be more inclined to attribute this scenario to 'age'. However, the poignant fact all must remember, sadly, and let me stress this once more, any girl is not worth the sneeze if she dispensed with the type of character display you shared with us. If this gal cannot respect the man enough, much less the sappy emotional garbage, to spend a minute to tell him 'why' considering the time they spent together, then your buddy will experience better life progression watching grass grow. With the apparent exception of one poster in this thread, who'd want a woman like that in their life to begin with?
According to Sting she did tell him...
Brass, I missed that (Reply 30)! Good calling that out. That's plenty enough for me, as I'm sure (speculative) some dialogue continued precisely after that for a bit. The title is also misleading. it isn't exactly a 'sudden silent treatment'. >:(
The gal broke-up, go home. Elvis already left the building.
look guys maybe her English is just not very good. Have you ever tried to explain something as nuanced as feelings in Russian? you think it's going to sound very courteous and classy? Give it a whirl see how far you get. Perhaps she thought she made an honest effort to deliver all the info that needed to be delivered but the guy just didn't get it or ignored it, so there was only one recourse left. No big these-Russians-are-so-cold-and-mysterious.I suspect you are correct.
Or could it be that he's just playing the victim card? Maybe his jokes were too crude, who knows? Not everything people say freely to friends and family in the West is anywhere near acceptable in Russia. Just something for you to think about.
look guys maybe her English is just not very good. Have you ever tried to explain something as nuanced as feelings in Russian? you think it's going to sound very courteous and classy? Give it a whirl see how far you get. Perhaps she thought she made an honest effort to deliver all the info that needed to be delivered but the guy just didn't get it or ignored it, so there was only one recourse left. No big these-Russians-are-so-cold-and-mysterious...
...Men who have a need to be 'nursed are always going to be demanding annoying over-analysis which usually evolve into hard exchanges, then argument, then hate...then next thing you know, he'll pop in Air Supply's *Here I am*,
...then he will never find closure, curses all women around his world, calls them obese, blames feminism, become socially dysfunctional and a misfit, etc...then, bwalla, welcomes himself to the world of the MOB, marries, then screws that up, too. Then he'll repeat the process, and likely will until Alzheimer finally does him in.
Well on the moving on part he may strike it lucky and get the right girl next time or he may make the same mistake again or another mistake. If he learns what went wrong before then he should be in better stead to avoid that problem in the future IF he learns from that mistake.
If he can't take it in and learn or doesn't want to know why then he could be making the same mistake over and over. He might be very socially inept/awkward and embarrassing to be around or he may have just been with the wrong girl. She may have just liked him and never loved him. It would of course help knowing just what her reason was?
I accept that I am not without my faults which I have admitted to in the past here. Some guys just can't admit that they too have faults as they are too proud to admit it - some get very defensive indeed getting all adversarial at the mere thought of it. They tend to be closed off to developing as a person and it's their loss in being like this. Likewise it's not just the man that has faults bit also the woman. As fellow men we tend to focus on what the man did wrong or was wrong with him on here. The woman though can have many faults, too materialistic, too volatile, too moralistic, poor social skills, etc, etc.
I think a guy who is good socially doesn't need an analysis of what went wrong every time. He knows it just wasn't right but naturally usually gets it right as he is well tuned in what to go for when it appears and when to hold and when to fold. A guy who is not socially skilled though needs more help in these matters. Once he knows what to look out for then he will recognise the signs being subtlely given off next time and will know what to go for and avoid and when to move on. To my mind I think there is generally regular types of situations that come about again and again in relationships and once you know how to deal with them once you know how to deal with them every time the occur in the future.
No, this guy is still in Russia. He's been working there a while and it happened all of a sudden. I don't know how they met but it was probably like how you would meet a local girl in your city.
So it's not like he was flying over there for visits, they were dating normally.
I'm just wondering if this is more a Russian mentality or due to youth.
No, this guy is still in Russia. He's been working there a while and it happened all of a sudden. I don't know how they met but it was probably like how you would meet a local girl in your city.
So it's not like he was flying over there for visits, they were dating normally.
I'm just wondering if this is more a Russian mentality or due to youth.
The one thing I spot in all/most of your posts, TC, is you have this silly perception that all women, whether domestic or abroad, are somehow beneath and less in state and being than you. No one, men or women, is 'all that', you know.
Unless that changes about you...you're screwed no matter how much 'learning' you think you're doing.
Guys I cannot understand, if it's such a painful experience for you why do you bother? You want American, buy American ;) .
I also ask myself somedays, why))) One guy I know dates Phillipinos only in Moscow as the Russian girls are "too capricious" in his opinion. I get "capricious Russian girls" but not Philipino girls. I'm joking a bit, there are lots of nice and normal Russian girls, I just haven't got to meet one yet.
By the way I'm not American, but more like you Fashionista.
Guys I cannot understand, if it's such a painful experience for you why do you bother? You want American, buy American ;) .
More like me? You moved to Canada from Russia? I think you are the bizarro me, you moved from Canada to Russia and you are a guy. I am joking of course :) . Maybe it's Moscow. I don't like this city myself. On the other hand the problem in a foreign country is that you don't feel the early telltale signs like the locals do, you think maybe this person isn't an idiot, maybe it's cultural, etc. How long have you been in Russia?
I'll have soon been here a year.
it is difficult for me to meet their expectation of a man. I'm not a Russian man and they don't know anything about where I come from. I'm trying to become more like a Russian man day after day). But I know I will never be a Russian man. Just a Canadian man living in Russia.
"Ghosting" is a term with which I am not familiar. What does it mean?
Boe, is there a Russian equivalent to the term?
"Ghosting" is a term with which I am not familiar. What does it mean?
More a millennial and younger age phenomenon within dating/relationships.
..... Maybe it has a lot to do with your personality and how approachable you are?
Not really, happened to me last summer with a 39 yr old women( a beauty). Things can and do break off to others rather quickly also....only have seen this in Russia/Ukraine, never at home where you could possibly run into.
I'm curious though, why are you writing for a "friend"?
I'm not writing for him. Just curious if this is normal behaviour. We were discussing business related things and I asked how's life over in Moscow. He regaled his story of how his ex-gf all of a sudden broke it off. I could tell he was deeply, genuinely hurt by it. She blocked him from all contact.
I didn't get this type of treatment with girls in Moscow, maybe I was lucky or dealing with more mature people. If a girl didn't want to date me anymore or vice versa we'd say it and end it amicably. I still keep in touch with some as friends.
Oh, so you are a fob :D . Don't worry, it'll pass eventually. After just a few years you will eventually feel, well, not Russian, but no longer a Canadian either.
Of course, the non-English speaking ones (the ones I will most likely meet) are more completely Russian with less awareness of outside culture. I have to admit, having tried this a few times, it is difficult for me to meet their expectation of a man.
Her English wasn't great but good enough to communicate. It was more the attitude of her not compromising on figuring out a solution.
The only thing I am a little careful of --is getting too chatty with beautiful girls ! No amount of "I was just being friendly" gets past my lady! ( although she does laugh about it now !)Despite not meeting her yet this is something I've had experience with recently and I've seen a little bit of jealously creeping in with some of my female friends.
I also ask myself somedays, why))) One guy I know dates Phillipinos only in Moscow as the Russian girls are "too capricious" in his opinion. I get "capricious Russian girls" but not Philipino girls. I'm joking a bit, there are lots of nice and normal Russian girls, I just haven't got to meet one yet.
To only date a Phillipino
"Ghosting" is a term with which I am not familiar. What does it mean?
Boe, is there a Russian equivalent to the term?
The word is Filipino -- easy to understand Bounder channelling Trenchcoat type ignorance --more is expected of you !
Hi Mendy,
"Ghosting" is a term that has come into use since the texting age. I don't know if there is now an equivalent term in Russian, but there were a lot of terms used that described this in the past, depending on the context. The one that comes closest that I know -
Лёг на дно, ушёл/ушла в подполье
I don't know if there is a direct equivalent that is more "modern"/up to date.
I can suggest a few, послать в игнор/включить игнор/шифроваться
Anyhow, the idea is that another person can quickly take a hint and there is no big drama that has to be dealt with. You would appreciate this in the country where there is practically no legal recourse against stalkers. You just gotta hide.
Before 2012 we in the UK had no law against stalking which is incredible that it took so long since it really took off in the nineties. There were problems with ex's bugging their former gf's here & there but I don't think the problem of stalking was that big there bit more with strangers. I don't think many women cut the guy out cold here for fear of stalking.
It may be a factor in the FSU but it's probably more the heavy bust up and/or seeing no point wasting time on the wrong guy I'm thinking.
Before 2012 we in the UK had no law against stalking which is incredible that it took so long since it really took off in the nineties. There were problems with ex's bugging their former gf's here & there but I don't think the problem of stalking was that big there bit more with strangers. I don't think many women cut the guy out cold here for fear of stalking.
It may be a factor in the FSU but it's probably more the heavy bust up and/or seeing no point wasting time on the wrong guy I'm thinking.
Even a single experience of having to sneak out the back door from work for a couple of months and watch out carefully for admirers with flowers next to where you live changes the outlook on things. And it's encouraged by the society, a man has to prove his love and be persistent. You never know when a person twice the size of you can turn violent, thinking that you are just playing with him, and it's better to be safe than sorry. But I suspect men will have hard time understanding that, to them it's just cold capricious behavior.
More Trench inaccurate nonsense, I'm afraid ((
FACTS:
http://www.cps.gov.uk/legal-guidance/stalking-and-harassment (http://www.cps.gov.uk/legal-guidance/stalking-and-harassment)
"In this legal guidance, the term harassment is used to cover the 'causing alarm or distress' offences under section 2 of the Protection from Harassment Act 1997"
.... This case the girl did tell him she was breaking up, so the guy should simply just move on regardless if he felt it was sudden and a poor explanation of why. If it was a test to see if he would try to win her back ,he failed. So move on. If it was really just her wanting to move on, he should move on....
Not always easy to be able to prosecute under 'harassment' otherwise they wouldn't have needed to bring in a stalking law. Getting sloppy on your old age Mobe ;)
Fully agree, AJ! That's really all the needs to be said. I can never understand why there are men (sic) out there that has the need to be pampered and/or nursed, undergo therapy, or yearn for some silly 'learning session' why he's an idiot and why she doesn't want him around in her life anymore.
I mean, how many more ways must a gal tell the idiot she no longer wants to be with him? Is there really solace for these men (?) to hear 100 different versions of that? WTF!
Come on now GQ, you hummed along to Air Supply! I was a metal.head, and likely still did at least once. LOL...
But pining after someone that was not interested in me ,was never something that crossed my mind, moving on quickly was pretty easy, perhaps I just don't have that gene,or not the romantic people tend to label me as lol
He was quite shaken up by this, I could tell he was heartbroken. It may have even been his first real love.
Yeah it's good he learned about this and to move on. He just needs some time to process it all first.
I posted this story because of two contradicting points:
1- She said she liked my friend but he liked her more and so they need to break up.
2- She then blocked all contact.
I've heard of the normal reasons for breaking up, I've even heard of people going silent. But this kinda defies logic. It could be she found another guy, just didn't like him anymore and didn't want to say it. Or simply a language issue. I don't know her English abilities.....
I posted this story because of two contradicting points:
1- She said she liked my friend but he liked her more and so they need to break up.
2- She then blocked all contact.
I've heard of the normal reasons for breaking up, I've even heard of people going silent. But this kinda defies logic. It could be she found another guy, just didn't like him anymore and didn't want to say it. Or simply a language issue. I don't know her English abilities.
He was quite shaken up by this, I could tell he was heartbroken. It may have even been his first real love.
Yeah it's good he learned about this and to move on. He just needs some time to process it all first.
Sounds perfectly reasonable to me.Would he prefer to be kept on the hook until she finds what she's looking for?
Guys living in Russia, don't get me wrong. I actually have admiration for westerners who moved to Russia for an extended period of time. It's courageous. Profoundly insane, but still courageous. Безумству храбрых поём мы песню. At least I had lotsa help. But you are immigrants now. Be immigrants. There are two sides to immigration. The positive side is you get to learn to live in a new world. The negative side is you get to learn to live in a new world. You certainly instantly move down the social status ladder. See which of the two experiences affects you more. I no longer read Russian expat sites in Canada, but when I was, every now and then someone would come out of the woods and say that Canadians are horrible because they don't do things the way we in Russia are used to do. They'd normally be laughed out of the building. 8) Integrate.
Bounder can you elaborate on their expectations?
I didn't even try dating a non-English speaking girl. No point. My Russian is so bad that 90% of the conversation will be in English.
There was one time where I had a frustrating time. I scheduled a date for a walk in the park. I said meet in front of the metro entrance. She ended up driving and tried to pick me up in the car at some street corner. This was a huge congested area and I couldn't figure out where she wanted to meet. I said to park and go to the metro. She insisted on the entrance to the park. Now there were several "parks" and monuments, walking areas in this place. I had never been here before.
I basically was wandering around for close to an hour trying to find it. I kept telling her to go to the metro but she refused. After 10 phone calls or so I eventually did find the entrance. Funny thing it was no more than a 10-12 minute walk from the metro. We were both fuming, me at her refusal to meet at the metro, and her at thinking it was easy to find the park entrance.
Her English wasn't great but good enough to communicate. It was more the attitude of her not compromising on figuring out a solution.
At least she waited for me but it was one of the most silent walks I've ever had!
I know it's difficult for people to believe, but there are girls who have
rejected my handsome and charming self.
I love Moscow and I’m happy here. Don’t really feel any downsides personally and I don’t really feel like I’ve gone down the social ladder here although definitely inadequate language skills Is a major disability that makes my life different than others.
And when she uses words like "nigger", better to talk about that than judge.
That should be your next step, learning Russian then, eh? Else how would you know what's going on if you don't understand what they are talking aboot?
Hmm, I am not sure you're dealing with something cultural here. You think Russians love making scenes and give grief to their friends for no particular reason?
One time it happened when I thought I had been overcharged about 300ru on a 1200ru grocery bill. So, I raised the issue because I now have the confidence to do so. But it quickly became apparent to the cashier and every customer in the growing queue that I was a foreigner and my language skills were limited (that is what I meant by making a scene). It was a cheeky reference to my own limitations in Russian.
I just said, because you must.
Oh my !! Isn't this like when the parent says: "Because I said so!!" :-)Yes. However since teaching grammar - in this case, the difference between past and perfect tense - has long been considered "too hard" on kids, what's the alternative ;)?
Got it. So how did they react (I am curious)?
Russian isn't an easy language to pick up. I remember trying to explain to an American who was learning Russian why using a particular prefix would change the meaning a particular way. Eventually I gave up. I just said, because you must.
Russians are very helpful, at least to foreigners!
One of funniest comments ever posted here.
One of funniest comments ever posted here.
Oh my !! Isn't this like when the parent says: "Because I said so!!" :-)