Time for some Humor!!

[Gator]

This happened to an Englishman in France who was totally drunk.


The French policeman stops his car and asks the gentleman if he has been drinking.


With great difficulty, the Englishman admits that he has been drinking all day, that his daughter got married in the morning to a French man, and that he drank champagne and a few bottles of wine at the reception and a quite few glasses of single malt thereafter.

Quite upset, the policeman proceeds to alcotest (breath test) him and asks the Englishman if he knows under French law why he is going to be arrested.

The Englishman answers,  "No, sir, I do not! But while we're asking questions, do you know that this is a British car and my wife is driving ... on the other side !!"

[Maybe not true]

[2tallbill]

I just came across Robin Williams's old show Weapons of Self Destruction:

Weapons of self destruction is a somewhat eerie show title.
RIP Robin Williams

He apparently killed himself
http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2014/08/11/robin-williams-is-dead/13925199/

[GQBlues]

Weapons of self destruction is a somewhat eerie show title.
RIP Robin Williams

He apparently killed himself
http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2014/08/11/robin-williams-is-dead/13925199/

Yeah  Too bad really...

My most beloved performer - From "nanu-nanu" to "Oh Captain, my Captain!" May he rest in peace...

[Shadow]

Yeah  Too bad really...

My most beloved performer - From "nanu-nanu" to "Oh Captain, my Captain!" May he rest in peace...

One of my favourites as well.

[Lily]

[fathertime]

Yeah  Too bad really...

My most beloved performer - From "nanu-nanu" to "Oh Captain, my Captain!" May he rest in peace...

Dead Poets Society was for me an unforgettable movie.  In many ways some of our greatest stars follow the rules of the universe in that the brighter they shine the quicker their light goes out.  Both Robin Williams and Phillip Seymour Hoffman were touching actors, and kind-hearted individuals. 


Fathertime!   

[GQBlues]

Dead Poets Society was for me an unforgettable movie.  In many ways some of our greatest stars follow the rules of the universe in that the brighter they shine the quicker their light goes out.  Both Robin Williams and Phillip Seymour Hoffman were touching actors, and kind-hearted individuals.

Yeah. Great movie! Robin Williams starred in 4 of my most favorite movies of all time. DPS, Goodwill Hunting, Fisher King and The World According to Garp...

[2tallbill]

Insert your Firefox seems to have a problem with windows
joke here

[2tallbill]

After being rejected by AW boy decides to pursue FSUW



Maybe he just should of started using tooth paste?

[2tallbill]

The guy still wants to pass.

[2tallbill]

Bungie jumping is not for everyone

[Gator]

When you look like this, you have to eat alone.   Her table manners are good except for not closing her mouth when chewing.


http://wallythekat.tripod.com/A_Pages/AA-Videos-YOU-Tube/Dog-Dining-Alone.html

[Anotherkiwi]

When you look like this, you have to eat alone.   Her table manners are good except for not closing her mouth when chewing.


http://wallythekat.tripod.com/A_Pages/AA-Videos-YOU-Tube/Dog-Dining-Alone.html

Lovely dog!  I wonder how long it took to train her? 

[Shadow]

Lovely dog!  I wonder how long it took to train her? 

Obedience 101. Staying in place while not allowed to walk and do not touch food until given. You can train almost any dog to do this.

[Gator]

As Chris Rock says, we give you as a Public Service:

[Lily]

[Gator]

The uniforms worn by the Colombia Women's Racing Team caused a stir in Italy.  They are not a two-piece.


http://www.news.com.au/sport/more-sports/colombian-womens-cycling-team-uniform-possibly-the-worst-sports-outfit-of-all-time/story-fndukor0-1227058781996

[ghost of moon goddess]

[Gator]

Good one Ghostie!   Another reason not to have a cat.  The list of reasons is in the 100s. 

[calmissile]

http://www.youtube.com/embed/LR2qZ0A8vic?rel=0

[SANDRO43]

VERY funny .

[Gator]

LETTERMAN'S 10 REASONS TO VOTE DEMOCRATIC NEXT WEEK


#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry
 whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my German Shepherd.

 #9. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies’ profits of 4% on
 a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon
 at 15% isn’t.

#8. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better
 job of spending the money I earn than I would.

#7. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as
 nobody is offended by it.

#6. I vote Democrat because I’m way too irresponsible to own a gun,
 and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from
 murderers and thieves. I am also thankful that we have a 911 service
 that get police to your home in order to identify your body after a
 home invasion.

#5. I vote Democrat because I’m not concerned about millions of
 babies being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive
 and comfy.


#4. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to
 free health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we
 should take away Social Security from those who paid into it.

#3. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be
 allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and
 give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the
 Democrat Party sees fit.

#2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite
 the Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never
 get their agendas past the voters.

…And the #1 reason I vote Democrat is because I think it’s better to
 pay $billions$ for oil to people who hate us, but not drill our own
 because it might upset some endangered beetle, gopher or fish here in
 America. We don’t care about the beetles, gophers or fish in those
 other countries.

[calmissile]

While many of us are wanting to strangle Putin and Obama, there is a diversion for some humor that allows us to temporarily forget the  crisis in Ukraine.  Take a look at this series.  It is a riot.     

http://www.trutv.com/shows/the-carbonaro-effect/index.html

[AkMike]

It was pointed out to me that on election day the Democratic vote started out with a pretty healthy lead - and then the Republicans got off work...

[AkMike]

The mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law Paddy
in a steaming rage and hurriedly packing his suitcase.

"What happened Paddy?" she asks anxiously.

“What happened?? I'll tell you what happened! I sent an e-mail to my
wife telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip.

I get home ... and guess what I found? Yes, your daughter, my wife Jean,
naked with Joe Murphy in our marital bed! This is unforgivable, the end
of our marriage. I'm done. I'm leaving forever!"

“Ah now, calm down, calm down Paddy!" says his mother-in-law. "There is
something very odd going on here. Jean would never do such a thing! There
must be a simple explanation. I'll go speak to her immediately and find
out what happened."

Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile.

“Paddy. I told you there must be a simple explanation ... she never got
your e-mail!"