Large age difference

[TigerPaws]

[/color][/font]On that we can agree KenC, I would like to know the reason as well.

 

[TigerPaws]

I've been to Ukraine four times and met dozens of women, watched many hundreds pass by on the street and in cafes.

The woman who was by far the most beautiful was 35 years old. It doesn't hurt that when she wears jeans and a halter she looks to be about 17. I realize she's a diamond in the rough, but she's not some pampered US model with a plastic surgeon and a team of personal trainers on retainer.

There are always exceptions I am only speaking in broad generalities groovlstk.

 

[KenC]

Tigerpaws,

Just as a note, I don't think that Playboy sets the standards for beauty in women.  Or even in women's bodies for that matter.  Their standards have really dropped over the years in my opinion.  Besides, with all the air brushing and breast implants, you have to know that those girls are not real.  Or at least not as they appear in the photos.

I also wonder where you get this facination with such young women and to consider a woman in her 30's a "bag" is a bit ridiculous to me.  What are you going to do when your wife goes over that hill? (Reaching her 30's?)

KenC

[alenika]

Ken it is like I said with unlimited choices why compromise, go for the gold ring and have it all. 

Typical user attitude.. or customer attitude - which is the same. Hmmmmm some seek partner abroad to find the one-and-only. Others seeks to find more profitable trade.

[alenika]

Tigerpaws,

Just as a note, I don't think that Playboy sets the standards for beauty in women.  Or even in women's bodies for that matter.  Their standards have really dropped over the years in my opinion.  Besides, with all the air brushing and breast implants, you have to know that those girls are not real.  Or at least not as they appear in the photos.

I also wonder where you get this facination with such young women and to consider a woman in her 30's a "bag" is a bit ridiculous to me.  What are you going to do when your wife goes over that hill? (Reaching her 30's?)

KenC

Ken this is again because of that customer-user-trade attitude. One more sign of them is that ads are meaningful for them. The more show, the more ad, the more flashing - they go for it.

[catzenmouse]

Ken it is like I said with unlimited choices why compromise, go for the gold ring and have it all. 

Typical user attitude.. or customer attitude - which is the same. Hmmmmm some seek partner abroad to find the one-and-only. Others seeks to find more profitable trade.
[/quote]
I can see it now..

 MOB-Mart:
 Your One Stop Shop For All Your FSUW Needs!

They'll even have the little hopping happy face. American consumers are some of the most spoiled pigs in the world because of this Wal-Mart mentality that the corporate world has developed over the past couple of decades. You'll never catch either one of us in that place!

Ken

[TigerPaws]

 

I also wonder where you get this facination with such young women and to consider a woman in her 30's a "bag" is a bit ridiculous to me.  What are you going to do when your wife goes over that hill? (Reaching her 30's?)

KenC

For the purposes of decussion if I were in the market for a bride again (I am not), why would I even bother with women in their 30's when there are so many availabe 30 and under? For me there is no advantage, no reason and no desire and as I have said before with nearly unlimited choices why bother?

As for my lady she will turn 31 next year and she is still very attractive, is she as beautiful as she was when she was 25... Honestly no she lost that magical glow which only comes with youth, is she still extremily attractive YES. Will she stay that way for the foreseeable future? Most likely. What will happen then, only time will tell because the only thing written in stone is that we all will die sooner or later, other than that everything else is up to you.

 

[TigerPaws]

Ken it is like I said with unlimited choices why compromise, go for the gold ring and have it all. 

Typical user attitude.. or customer attitude - which is the same. Hmmmmm some seek partner abroad to find the one-and-only. Others seeks to find more profitable trade.
[/quote]
alenika,

 And what is wrong with "Typical user attitude.. or customer attitude" ? Your romantic notion is fine but not the only way to go about things, do you mean to tell me you do not know of couples where romance was not the reason for being together and that many of those relationships have stood the test of time?

 

[TigerPaws]

Tigerpaws,

Just as a note, I don't think that Playboy sets the standards for beauty in women.  Or even in women's bodies for that matter.  Their standards have really dropped over the years in my opinion.  Besides, with all the air brushing and breast implants, you have to know that those girls are not real.  Or at least not as they appear in the photos.

I also wonder where you get this facination with such young women and to consider a woman in her 30's a "bag" is a bit ridiculous to me.  What are you going to do when your wife goes over that hill? (Reaching her 30's?)

KenC

Ken this is again because of that customer-user-trade attitude. One more sign of them is that ads are meaningful for them. The more show, the more ad, the more flashing - they go for it.[/quote]
alenika,

 Maybe this is not your way but your way is not the only way to do things, others do what is right for them as long as both people are happy what is the difference?

 

[TigerPaws]

Ken it is like I said with unlimited choices why compromise, go for the gold ring and have it all. 

Typical user attitude.. or customer attitude - which is the same. Hmmmmm some seek partner abroad to find the one-and-only. Others seeks to find more profitable trade.
[/quote]
I can see it now..

 MOB-Mart:
 Your One Stop Shop For All Your FSUW Needs!

They'll even have the little hopping happy face. American consumers are some of the most spoiled pigs in the world because of this Wal-Mart mentality that the corporate world has developed over the past couple of decades. You'll never catch either one of us in that place!

Ken
[/quote]
[user=9]catzenmouse[/user],

 That is pretty much what we have now within the MOB industry isn't it?

 Wal-Mart, Sears, Pennys and damn near any other place you shop is all the same sir, get used to it.

 

[BC]

Andie McDowell was my all time fav. If I were single there's no way I would turn down a date even if she is a couple years older than me.. the wrinkles 'n sags wouldn't make a bit of difference even if she were broke.

I wouldn't marry her right off based on my 'perceptions' alone, but if they were even close those younger, tighter chicks wouldn't deserve a second glance.

She just has that 'something' that makes me melt..

btw.. wifey does too.

[KenC]

I also wonder where you get this facination with such young women and to consider a woman in her 30's a "bag" is a bit ridiculous to me.  What are you going to do when your wife goes over that hill? (Reaching her 30's?)

KenC

As for my lady she will turn 31 next year and she is still very attractive, is she as beautiful as she was when she was 25... Honestly no she lost that magical glow which only comes with youth, is she still extremily attractive YES. Will she stay that way for the foreseeable future? Most likely. What will happen then, only time will tell because the only thing written in stone is that we all will die sooner or later, other than that everything else is up to you.

 
[/quote]
Tigerpaws,

I respect that you can live your life any way you want, but I feel very sorry for you.  The inability to develope a strong emotional bond is a very sad thing indeed.

KenC

[catzenmouse]

[user=9]catzenmouse[/user],

 That is pretty much what we have now within the MOB industry isn't it?

 Wal-Mart, Sears, Pennys and damn near any other place you shop is all the same sir, get used to it. 

TigerPaws,

 You've got a very interesting way of looking at things. I don't agree with you in a lot of this but if you're happy and she's happy then good for you.

Ken

[TigerPaws]

Tigerpaws,
I respect that you can live your life any way you want, but I feel very sorry for you.  The inability to develope a strong emotional bond is a very sad thing indeed.

KenC

KenC,

 After loosing far too many to conflict, health problems and even murder the cost it too high to become overly attached to anything anymore. Don't feel sorry for me because I am happy.

 

[TigerPaws]

[user=9]catzenmouse[/user],

 That is pretty much what we have now within the MOB industry isn't it?

 Wal-Mart, Sears, Pennys and damn near any other place you shop is all the same sir, get used to it. 

TigerPaws,

 You've got a very interesting way of looking at things. I don't agree with you in a lot of this but if you're happy and she's happy then good for you.

Ken
[/quote]
Thank you and after all that is what life is all about isn't it? Being Happy.

 

[anono]

Just as a note, I don't think that Playboy sets the standards for beauty in women.

my mother sets this standard.

it's part of my problem.

doing as well as my dad did.

[TigerPaws]

Just as a note, I don't think that Playboy sets the standards for beauty in women.

my mother sets this standard.

it's part of my problem.

doing as well as my dad did.
[/quote]
You do know anono that you CAN change that, by making different choices?

 

[anono]

no, i'm good with it :cool:

[TigerPaws]

no, i'm good with it :cool:

Well than why did you call it a problem?

 

[beefox]

Ok Kevin, very direct question for us all out here in the ether- a very pragmatic water test for us all. When people are happy they 'Radiate' exactly how they feel about each other. No words required. For the onlooker if this is absent then questions in their own minds may well be raised about the nature of the relationship, but for what reasons ?. Our western societys have certain protocols of behaviour. Over the last 3-4 generations the bar has been lowered age match wise and so have peoples generally expectations of what is an 'acceptable' difference. My ex- girlfriend who I am very close to had a grandfather back in Ireland in the late 1950's who was 60 when he married a cousin who was 18 !. He first met her when she resided in a pram !- Go get her cowboy !. Not only that, they had 10 children and were by all accounts remarkably happy. Nobody batted an eyelid as far as she knows. Similar trysts are found societys with strong rural traditions as we all know as well as in indigenous cultures. Perhaps in our sanitised urban cultures we have become too squeamish ?. There is much to recommend these differences although I would be circumspect about the potential chances of success should the woman be in her late teens and her husband in the grip of middle age. However, I also feel that amongst these RW's are some truly incredible individuals that possess a maturity and 'Soulfullness' that I have never encountered before in Western women. O.k, that's a generalisation but you get my drift ?. Even in these circumstances these partnerships can be very successful- love literally conquers all. I am 48 and the girl I am to meet is 26. I have wrestled with myself over the age issue but I feel myself slipping gently toward her with an almost divine inevitability !. Getting back to the picture of the 2 of you. Sweet jesus you both look happy in that picture.  You look, as we say in 'cockney ryhming slang' here in London, 'PUKKA' !. Just right, bullseye etc. All on this website share the hope which that represents. Happy people make good people so we should stride into our respective futures with you along with those others that have succeeded . About this forum ; This website is the next village down from nirvana as far as it has helped me immensely in clarifying the experience and practicalities of falling in love in this way. Viva RW all, and one in particular !. Happy hunting seekers !. Best wishes- Bernie

[jb]

I am 48 and the girl I am to meet is 26. I have  wrestled with myself over the age issue but I feel myself slipping  gently toward her with an almost divine inevitability

Forgive me for saying so, but this sounds like you've fallen in love with a photograph.

[beefox]

Ah. . . .Nice try but only half right !. Seems like you spotted an iceberg !. As always, most lies beneath the surface. Sure, pics are a viseral treat and we'll all subscribe to that one but as we all know that's only part of the story. Excuse the lyricism but it's a congenital defect I have ; 6 months writing and a planned visit, head not extended too high above the trenches !. Going in February. Not taking any risks at present- Call me a mobile anthropologist. What are your perceptions of me, you were half right so you'd probably rightly deduce that I'm a greenhorn, how green though ?. Photo guy got a griling, ok, a tad naive, but strangely he was working some other senses there methinks. Was that all just 'Russian roulette' or is his acuity sharper than his collective detractors could give account for ?. Be interesting to see what you've garnered from me thus far- best wishes. 'The bee'

[Turboguy]

jb is my favorite person to disagree with but I think I have to agree with him this time.   I don't disagree with the age difference.   I just think that you might find something different than you expect when you actually meet.   I have fallen in love with a photograph (and warm romantic letters) a million times myself.  90% of the time who I meet is not who I thought I was meeting.

I just spent last week in Ukraine.  I had one gal who I thought was going to be terrific.  It seemed like we were soulmates in our letters.  She could pour out her heart to me and I could pour out my heart to her.   I planned to spend 4 days with her and since I had some free time planned short meetings with 2 others, (one fell through).  

The end results is that the gal I spent 4 days with turned out to be a dud.  She was the hardest gal to talk to I ever met.  We had no communication and spent most of the 4 days inventing ways to avoid each other.  The other gal who I was meeting just because I was there and had a free day turned out to be the nicest gal I have met in my life.  She was totally awsome.   I am heading back in 4 weeks to spend more time with her.    As far as age difference I have more with either of those than you do.

[alenika]

alenika,
 Maybe this is not your way but your way is not the only way to do things, others do what is right for them as long as both people are happy what is the difference?

I didn't say it was wrong. I just told that this exists. I am glad you agree of this about yourself - it's always better to have open eyes than speak that rubbish about love. Everyone has own choice, justbetter when they realise what choice they do and that this is their own choice. I hope you remember that trade relationship contains this "trade" part for both of you in family.

I want also say that such type of relations exist much moreoften than people think. Even here if to look arguments of those who are against age difference - they speak much that this age difference is dangerous, risky, that it's difficult to meet honest woman with large age of difference and therefore it's better to seek other options - more available and reliable ones. They don't care at all if woman will be happy in this relaitonship, they only care that if she will not be happy, then this can lead to break and disaster. And then they argue that they don't want tobe insuch trade relationship, they are better than that. But arguments about risks of couple with large age difference already means that that they are seeking for trade still. Just more reliable trade - with less age difference.

[BC]

Bee,

Looking at the typical boy meets girl situation, initial personal contact causes some kind of communication that when evaluated by both parties leads to common interests and possibly a desire to persue a relationship.  Things usually move along rather quickly and either the relationship forms or slips away.  All in real-time and face to face.  This is how most of us learn and are conditioned to persue relationships.  Yes, fantasy plays a role during this short period but the stark reality of the situation (ie she dated another guy last nught) is usually enough to 'snap' us out of that lovestruck state..

On the other hand long distance introductions that begin with trading of photo's and romantic correspondence is clearly territory most are not familiar with.   It doesn't matter if you are 20 or 90 or how much you have learned from past relationships or conquests, you will likely be totally unprepared and defenseless.  Surely Valentine cards passed from desk to desk in school certainly does not qualify for a degree in MOB.

I believe that the real problem during a prolonged letter writing period is that many men 'condition', fantasize and yes even brainwash themselves into believing that a relationship actually exists with a woman they have not even met.  The mind is very receptive to repeated suggestions.. that is how we learn.  2 plus 2 equals 4, over and over and over.  Consider each letter a daily training session, each photo reinforcing evidence.. over and over and over again.  I'm sure these concious and subconcious thought processes repeat themselves hundreds of times each day, month after month, literally erasing our logic and objective capabilities .  That's a tough nut to crack.

I'm sure honest women can also be similarly affected but considering the amount of mail most popular (young hot) women receive it's hard to believe they can emotionally 'attach' themselves so easily to one author alone.  The scammers of course love us all~!

That's IMHO 'falling in love with a picture'.

On top of it all, media of all types concentrate their visuals on the young and pretty women, very few mainstream erotic venues will show grey, sags or god forbid stretchmarks unless it is fetish oriented.  Hollywood touts otherwise incompatible couples and look how long (or short) most last.  I'm sure some of these relationships are created for simple PR shock purposes but still they do help create a popular image of social acceptability to the point of faddism.

Like during 'normal' dating, when writing we may tend to show only our best and ignore more pointed questions like:

What compels your interest in a 48 year old man?
Have you ever dated or had a relationship with someone as old as I am?
etc.

I think men are rarely asked the same type of questions by the women.

How about men asking themselves?