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Author Topic: pretrip report to ukraine, 2005  (Read 41112 times)

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Offline anono

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #25 on: February 05, 2005, 05:07:27 AM »
oh.

nevermind.

Offline OhioGuyRob

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #26 on: March 13, 2005, 07:29:52 AM »
Quote from: anono
hi bruce and dave, thank you.

bruce, i have been thinking of posting more about the "kid in the candy store" and men on their first trip or two...

the second major interest was also young, better than anything i'd find here, open with a great personality, but again, i found myself thinking she wasn't the one.

i think it takes some time to fully realize the potential you have here of finding someone as close to that 10 of what you are looking for..  it is a very real possibilty to find that 8.8 or 9.2



Ahhhh grasshopper, here is where you err.... That woman who is an 8-10 there is going to be a 10 here.  It wont take her long to figure that out once she is back state side with you.  It is far more important to find someone who really digs you.  Once you get back stateside that 10 who is with you because of your "potential" is going to upgrade on you.  That is unless you run with the big dogs.....

Offline OhioGuyRob

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #27 on: March 13, 2005, 07:38:36 AM »
Quote from: Goombah
So she was sleeping with you while text messaging her german boyfriend?  What was her first name?  

I have a female friend there that makes me believe this without thinking twice.  She was with her boyfriend (about to break off the relationship) when she was flirting with me via e-mail (and told me she didn't have a boyfriend).  She told me she was in love with a guy in California while living with another guy in Kiev... and is living with her third boyfriend now in, oh, 6 months.

She also had a german guy she considered a friend for the past two years that finally made it clear to me (at least, she still has a hard time believing it) that all he really wanted was a mistress.

Make me believe the stories about ladies living with a guy, but not considering them romantically - its just a practical thing.  Different world over there...

Kevin



Welcome to the world of the beautiful woman.....

This is why developing your "inner game" is critical IMO.  The beautiful woman gets hit on 100 times a month.  She has seen it all, heard it all.  Soon it becomes a blur.... the endless stream of men with money and looks....   Why do you suppose they are like this?

Its more than pratcial... she can pretty much have whom ever she desires.  She hangs with a man initially because he somehow stands out from the crowd.  99% of the time men turn into wussbags around a hot babe once they give them there attention.  Women are very, very, very different than men.  A man see's a hot babe and he is attracted and until/unless she becomes real rude he is diggin her big time.  Women are very different... women are more like, I like you at this moment until you do something stupid.  Men have on/off switches.  You either like a woman or you dont.

Women are more like volume dials on an amplifier. If you do a lot of the right things, they become more and more interested in you... Women more than anything love adventure and mystery.  Why do you think Romance novels sell so much???  Im reasonalby sure 99.9% of men arent making Danelle Steele a multi millionaire....'

With out a great inner game, that 10 will dump you so fast you wont even know what happened
« Last Edit: March 13, 2005, 07:40:00 AM by OhioGuyRob »

Offline Bruce

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #28 on: March 13, 2005, 11:24:22 AM »
Rob - What you wrote was a great characterization - I just have to quote it again to help out the guy(s) pursuing...................................

 

"Welcome to the world of the beautiful woman.....

This is why developing your "inner game" is critical IMO. The beautiful woman gets hit on 100 times a month. She has seen it all, heard it all. Soon it becomes a blur.... the endless stream of men with money and looks.... Why do you suppose they are like this?

Its more than pratcial... she can pretty much have whom ever she desires. She hangs with a man initially because he somehow stands out from the crowd. 99% of the time men turn into wussbags around a hot babe once they give them there attention. Women are very, very, very different than men. A man see's a hot babe and he is attracted and until/unless she becomes real rude he is diggin her big time. Women are very different... women are more like, I like you at this moment until you do something stupid. Men have on/off switches. You either like a woman or you dont.

Women are more like volume dials on an amplifier. If you do a lot of the right things, they become more and more interested in you... Women more than anything love adventure and mystery. Why do you think Romance novels sell so much??? Im reasonalby sure 99.9% of men arent making Danelle Steele a multi millionaire....'

With out a great inner game, that 10 will dump you so fast you wont even know what happened"
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline anono

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #29 on: March 13, 2005, 12:59:16 PM »
hi bruce and ohio.. i agree 100% with the inner game you quoted from ohio.

the other post from ohio i haven't quite figured out. i know my 8, 9's and 10's, regardless of where they are from and i am highly aware of what it takes to keep them (which is why i agree with the inner game quote). i do not understand where it is i "erred". my 1-10 scale is universal.

an 8 here (i'm in kiev as i type) is an 8 in my small town of edwardsville, IL. likewise a 10 here is, of course, a 10 there. if you cannot keep a 8 in edwardsville, you're not going to keep a 8 here.

but, simply because of the numbers, you WILL get a lot more women of a higher number interested in you. keeping them is another story

Offline Bruce

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #30 on: March 14, 2005, 04:36:43 AM »
When are you going over anyway?  I'll be over to Russia mid-June through early July.

I think Ohioguy was just mentioning that alot of the beautiful girls would get alot more attention once they get here so you have to be darn sure of your relationship before you bring them over.  I know that is a given with you Anno since you are so cautious.  You remind me so much of what I was doing, taking my time, being so careful.  I think it has payed off for me and will for you as well. 
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline anono

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #31 on: March 24, 2005, 07:02:41 PM »
success!  ??!!!

hi bruce, i'm in kiev now. just returned from moscow. i will probably be here in june as well. or moscow anyway.

i do not like moscow, i will start by saying i did not see a lot of moscow but i did have a flat maybe 100-200 meters from red square. kiev is a much prettier city, and maybe i'm just prejudiced, but i like the ukrainian ladies better.

BUT, i think i met the right lady...  the story:

i went to moscow to meet a lady from samara. we "met" on a matchwebsite that features mostly american women, i think it might be related to the match.com group of websites. this lady had a computer in her home. she also had a yahoo messinger presence. we started by chatting online maybe 10-20 minutes a day. that lead to telephone conversations on a daily basis. she met me at the SVO airport in moscow. i was also greeted by nina, from vestafortune.ru. she is one of jack braggs contacts. of course, as is now the usual expectation from my association with jack, nina is a very nice and helpful lady (so is larissa, the other lady in the office).

nina took us to my flat. it is not renovated to western standards but it is a nice, very clean two bedroom flat. huge in a way. right on tverskaya.

while the lady from samara and i hit it off and we had a very nice first day or so, she turned out to be too difficult for my liking. during the day we went into one resturant for lunch and while standing in line (it was buffet style), she complained that it was too busy and there were no tables. i tried to explain the line would move quickly and i'm sure a table will open up by the time we get our food. she insisted so we went to another restuarant that was empty. she complained that this one was empty so we found one with the right number of people in it i guess.

that evening, when we were looking for another place to have our dinner, i could see i was going to have the same problem. to me, a resturant is a restuarant. if the food is good, i come back, if it isn't, i do not. while walking down tverskaya. i was becoming a bit agitated with her and simply told her i would choose the restuarant, she agreed. we walked by a resturant, she balked when i said, let's go in here. i started to walk away with her and thought, the heck with this, this is the place i am choosing, i turned around and left her to decide to either stay on the street in the cold or join me. she chose to join me and when we sat down with our food, we had a little discussion. i explained to her one resturant is as good as another,  when neither of you really know the resturants. i explained further how i make decisions and she agreed. the food was fine, the dinning experience just like it would have been had we chose any other.

to make a long story short, later at the flat she went from one extreme to the other over our discussion about her being difficult. i was ready to send her home to samara. she settled things by leaving the next morning. i was fine with this decision.

i had some back up of the party girl type, made a few calls but never connected with any ladies. i had a good prospect in kazan and made a trip to kazan by train but that's another story. didn't work out with the lady there so i called some backup girls. stayed in kazan for two nights but went back to moscow.

nina had told me about her catalogs so i went to her office and checked them out. larissa was there and i chose five women, one or two in st. petersburg.

i met with one, lady "A". she was nice, we went to eat, had some drinks and went to "che", a kind of tex-mex place with tequila. had a nice enough time that i wanted to see her tomorrow. the next day, she i think slept in (according to her sister who answered the phone). later that day she told me she had to go to work. whatever.

i had met another lady in the meantime but there was no real attraction to her on my part. the next day i saw "A" again, we had a meal at some tibetian restuarant which was good (and an interesting place). she looked a lot better this day than the first, i got a better look at her figure and butt in particular and since we had such good conversation, i thought i ought to give this girl a chance. we discussed her coming to kiev sometime over the next two weeks because i was returning to kiev the next day. she knew the office was setting me up with another woman or two and she completed understood this and she added they of course want to make some money while i was there. i made light of the situation and told her i'd do it but doubted it would be anyone i would be interested in. she even wished me good luck or something like that.

how ironic.

the office calls, tells me "B" was going to meet me at 1pm, but since i was meeting with "A" at that time, they canceled with "B". nina said she would call her back and then call me. "B" agrees to meet me at 7pm. i went to the office to pay them for the few meetings i had and also took another look at "B"s profile. nina told me how refined and nice this lady is, i kidded her about having good taste and also how she was holding out the best for last.

again this is ironic.

i meet "B" at 7. she is better than her pics, which are good. we go to a rather expensive resturant, one suggested to both of us by nina. she chooses something very reasonable and since i had tibetian earlier, i just had a salad.

we spent only an hour and 1/2, maybe two hours together. jack, in the past, has told me "when you meet her you will know". i was skeptical of this, not having experienced it before. some close calls, but i never felt sure, always in the back of my mind, i'm thinking "nice, but" (no, not nice butt). there was always something that wasn't quite right. well this was different.

the conversation was easy and it just flowed right out of my mouth. i could see she was buying everything i was saying.  in the space of almost two hours, i must have said all the right things because this lady later text messaged me and told me i am "perfect".

i did not sleep..i could not stop thinking about her and now what? i finally fell asleep about 5 or 6 am with a 7:20 wake up for my ride to the airport. i messaged "B" and she also had trouble sleeping.

i get back to kiev (i love kiev compared to moscow. i know the city well, the people are better, the place is brighter, it's just a better city and i love kiev). i finally get some sleep and call "B". she says after our meeting, she felt "hypnotized". she said she felt "drunk" since meeting me. she had sent text messages asking when will i return? she wanted me there in moscow. it will feel like "ages" before i return. how long will you be in kiev? the usa? we discuss the possibilities.

it's now friday morning. i have two weeks before my rent is up in my flat here in kiev. i am going to call "B' later, she wants to catch up on her sleep. we had discussed her coming to kiev but she said she could not for 10 days, but would after that and we would have some days together here before i leave for the usa. (i have some personal and business matters i have to attend to but that ought to keep me in the states for maybe 3-4 weeks and i would return to either kiev or moscow).  she told me she needs to do a few things and will know in a few days if she can come to kiev.

i think i found her. she seems to feel the same way. we discussed the reality of all of this and how we need to spend time together and see if it's real.

i am going to call her later and offer to come back to moscow. why waste 10 days when i can be spending these last two weeks with her...?

about russia in general. it sucks having to register your visa. it's just a pain in the ass. do NOT use gotorussia.com for your invite letter. i had to find their office in moscow and then you have to wait a day or two, go back and pick up your stamped (registered) immigration card. total waste of time. had i known about nina and vestafortune, they could have handled it and registered me with my first office visit. so get your invite letter from nina or some place that can register your visa without waiting a day.

i like ukraine far better than russia but that might be just because i know ukraine so well, having spent 7 months here in 2004.

i like the ukrainian ladies better. funny thing is, "B' is ukrainian. her family is from eastern ukraine, they moved to moscow when she was 15 and when they moved back to ukraine, she stayed in moscow.

suits me!

 

Offline Bruce

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #32 on: March 25, 2005, 01:55:37 AM »
Anno - great trip report.  You have had alot of meetings and side trips.  Kazan by train sounds like an experience that will improve with age.  Well, your assessment of Kiev vs Moscow is typical.  Most guys get overwhelmed by Moscow.  To me, nothing beats Red Square and culturally, Moscow has better attractions.  Moscow is big and cold, alot like New York.  It is alot easier to feel comfortable in Kiev.  Too bad you did not get a chance to go to St. Petersburg, which I believe is the best combination of design, culture and comfort levels of the big cities in the FSU.  Still, I do not know many who have trekked through so much of the FSU like you have.  I hope your new Ukrainian or transplanted Moscow girl will turn out for the best.  Please keep us posted - everybody is pulling for you!!!
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline anono

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« Reply #33 on: March 25, 2005, 07:37:37 AM »
thanks again bruce, i'll get to your PM when i finish here.

i have been to st. pete, back in august of 2003 with svetlana, the first girl i dated from ukraine (from zaporojhe. she was a beauty queen of zap when she was 18).  we visited the hermitage (for those of you who are never going to come here, go find or see "the russian ark"). 19 kilometers of art. more rembrants the the rembrant museum in amsterdam. two da vinci's (out of 7 known), one the madonna. i never saw so much art in one place and i have been to paris, amsterdam, albi (FR), vienna and a few other large cities, some known for their art collections.

then there is the peterhof, the summer residence of peter the great. they should call it the summer city of peter the great. i guess they did not have anything better to do but wake up one morning and decide to coat all the lawn art with gold. it's a palace with other palaces on a huge estate. i would have been greatful to live in the slaves quarters if they had any.

i talked with "B", she is thrilled that i am returning. i went to the aerosvit office and leave tomorrow and stay two weeks if we get along and she can put up with me.

if you want to see just why i am going back to moscow, i'll figure out a way to post her pic someday.

:dude:

 

 

Offline jb

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #34 on: March 26, 2005, 11:51:48 AM »
anono,

Great news~!  I hope this turns out to be the answer to your prayers.

Regards your dislike of Moscow, I wonder if it isn't weather related, all my in-laws and our friends in Moscow tell us this has been an exceptionally sh*tty winter, more snow and sub-zero temps than they've seen in many years.  In a couple of months Moscow will be back to it's old, lovely, vibrant, lively, self.  Don't sell it short, it's still a world class city.

Let us know how things flow for the next 10 days with your new lady, we are rootin' for you.

Offline Michelangelo

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #35 on: March 27, 2005, 04:15:30 AM »
Thanks, Anno...for the stories of your quest!  I think your story will make me be a bit more cautious about committing to a girl who is "almost" perfect to me!  At any rate, I will be back in Keiv in April and then to Kharkov in May to spend a week with my girl and I suppose I will know more then about the match.  Good luck to you on the rest of your trip! How much longer are you there?
The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.  michelangelo

Offline anono

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« Reply #36 on: April 01, 2005, 01:50:07 AM »
thanks jb and michael and everyone else. jb, yes, i found out this is an exceptioanlly harsh winter. it was -20c the other night -5 during the day.. today is the first nice day  out of several..i think it is even melting a little of the built up snow.

i live in a town that was 10k when i was growing up. it is now 20k but a suburb of the cow town, st. louis. luckily i live on the other side of the river in the more progressive and liberal state of IL. (ashcroft is from MO and as far as i am concerned, a huge embarassment to the usa as attorney general. he spent 50k of our tax dollars covering up the bust of the naked breasts of some marble statue. anyone who has sexual thoughts looking at such a statue  has problems i do not want to try and address. he needs psychological help).

i have spent a week with "o". she is a sweet lady. slow in coming around in some areas, but this is part of her chararacter and what the hell, i've only been with her a week. took me a lot longer to train a few AW back before i found U/RW. (don't take that the wrong way ladies, i'm sure you "train" us men in some ways also).

we have had great conversations. i recommend you folks to read back at that place that banished me and anyone else with their own opinions (RWG) and read about "conversations in reverse". you need to be careful that you do not "telegraph" the answers you want to hear to the lady you are speaking with. try and not give any clue as to what you want, let them answer as honestly and accurately as they can. this usually is not a problem because most of the women i have met are direct and honest about their lives and desires.

"o" is a "keeper" by most any way you can size her up. she is not necessarily looking for marriage unless she has children, which she says she wants someday. she owns her own flat (worth $200-250k) has a great job and a good life. as she puts it, her life here is "perfect". she says she is "scared" of marriage because she feels she may lose her sense of freedom and identity. marriage has not necessarily been my goal either. i think you can have a monogamous lifelong relationship without marriage. in fact, marriage can change things in a psychologival way (read "sperm wars") and change the dynamics of an otherwise workable relationship. at my age, i see marriage as only a possible necessity for children/family. as long as a ladies heart belongs to me, marriage is only a ring and a piece of paper. i know far too many AW married to men they do not love; in fact i think it is the vast majority. they marry for other reasons.

i am returning to the states in about 9 days to take care of some personal business and my new bmw k12 might be arriving soon. i am only going to stay in the usa for 3-4 weeks and return to russia/ukraine for at least another month.

i want to continue with "o" and see how it develops. i am fairly sure (as anyone can be knowing each other only a little more than a week) that we could have a mutually satisfying and possible long term relationship. she is, without a doubt, far better than anyone i could possibly find in the USA. but, then again, that goes for most of the women i have met here. there simply is no comparision.

AW lack civility. they insult under the excuse of "i was just kidding". i have been blamed for all their bad choices made long before meeting me. i have been told (by AW) what i feel and think and why without being simply asked. in fact, when i protest, they try and tell me they know what i think and feel better than i do. AW are non-existent in my life anymore and i do not even look at them, not even the best looking because i know the horrors that accompany them. they are all confused and have pasts that are the fault of their own bad choices and they take no responsibility for their miserable lives. one of my brothers is going through a divorce after 15 years of marriage. his soon to be ex takes NO responsiblity for their failed marriage and everything is my brothers fault. he is the states attorney of our county, makes $130k (took a pay cut from his private practice) she says he should get a better job, the $60k she gets in child support and alimony is not enough to support her while she sits on her pretty ass doing nothing.

ok, i'll stop my rant against AW because it is not appropriate for this thread. i must have had a good nights sleep.

anyway, i read in another thread something about a guy who brags about having met 150 women. i understand to some extent where he is coming from and have nothing against his approach or what he is looking for. i also understand where leslie is coming from when he posts about having considered buying a flat in kiev and just dating. it is a candy store. i meantion this, because the first guy said something very true. if he had used the methods of many of the men who come here looking, he would have found "the one" some 120 times or something like that.

i think many men who find the first good looking R/UW who will have anything to do with them "settle" for this woman because she is, generally, far better than anything he is going to meet at home in the USA.

i mention this, because even as fine as a lady as "o" is, i want to be as sure of this as possible. i am tired of living most of my life alone. i want to share what i have (and i do not mean material things) with a lady who will love me as much as i am capable of loving her. i feel i should meet a few of the other ladies i have had contact with and see how i really feel about "o". i might need to remind that i am not married, i have only known this lady for a week. in the USA we do date without so much at stake.

i may come back and take a few weeks time to go and meet the "best of the best", the ladies who may be even more suitable for the type relations i am looking for than "o". i may come away from such an experience feeling that "o" IS "the one" and i will also be satisfied that i followed through with my communications with these other ladies. i may return to "o" knowing i made the right choice. it will also give her time to be sure i am the right choice for her. this is a two way street.

so far, this has been a great experience. i spent 7 months in ukraine in 2004. i spent almost 4 months in ukraine in 2003. these have been the best years of my life regarding women. (i consider the decade of the 90's my best 10 years as a competitive skydiver and instructor. there was nothing like it in my life).

i might feel differently when i leave "o" and moscow in another week. we are still bonding and becoming accustomed to each other, developing our "habits" together. i feel as if we could "fall in love" and have a happy long term relationship and i am sure i would enjoy it and be better off because of it. i think she feels the same way.  we have another week of great conversations to delve more deeply into each other and make decisions that could effect the rest of our lives.

this is serious business when we come half way across the world to find a compatible mate. this is NOT child's play.

so far, so good!

:dude:

p.s. i do not reveal "o"s name because, as i have seen in the past, some jerk will try and contact her and tell her stories or twist what i report into something else and otherwise try and ruin what we have. in one of my first reports in 2003, some idiot contacted the interpreter i was seeing at the time and scared the living ship out of her. if i ever find that guy, just out of principle i may kick the living ship out of him simply because he is such an ass. to men like that, i say get a life before someone takes it from you.

Offline jb

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #37 on: April 01, 2005, 01:07:56 PM »
anono,

I hope "o" isn't even her real initial.

Offline anono

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« Reply #38 on: April 01, 2005, 01:12:46 PM »
you're a smart man jb, it isn't.  i have found some guys will do anything to make sure no one is happy or are as miserable as they are. i think they have some AW in them or something.

Offline anono

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« Reply #39 on: April 01, 2005, 01:16:16 PM »
i should also add, this was the nicest day, weather wise, since i have been in moscow. it was warm enough that there was some snow-melting action going on. "o" tells me it will be +4 tomorrow!!

and to think back home they are having 21c (70f) weather...lol!  i could be (and will be soon) riding my motorcycle!

Offline tim 360

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« Reply #40 on: April 03, 2005, 11:59:47 AM »
It is always great to read your trip reports anno.  I also had read some on that "banished board" last year.  You put alot of good info and introspection into them. Good luck, Tim
"Never argue with a fool,  onlookers may not be able to tell the difference".  Mark Twain

Offline TigerPaws

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pretrip report to ukraine, 2005
« Reply #41 on: April 03, 2005, 04:30:28 PM »
Quote from: anono
success!  ??!!!

. jack, in the past, has told me "when you meet her you will know". i was skeptical of this, not having experienced it before. some close calls, but i never felt sure, always in the back of my mind, i'm thinking "nice, but" (no, not nice butt). there was always something that wasn't quite right. well this was different.

annono,

 This was for me the most difficult thing for me to accept because like you I was told the very same thing word for word. After meeting and spending time with 32 different ladies over a cople of years I have to agree when I met Victoria I knew without a doubt she was the one for me. Now when I tell this to other men they look at me the same way I must have looked when I was told this and thinking what I then thought "Ya! Right"

Offline anono

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« Reply #42 on: April 05, 2005, 11:25:40 AM »
thanks tim..

tiger, it happened again, only this time no reservations.

"o" has a drawback that is jeapordizing our relationship. too personal to go into here on the board.

i got tired of being cooped up in her flat in moscow. where she lives you can't just walk out the door and go walking like you can in the centers of most of these cities. this personal drawback is waning my interest in her, but she is, in many ways, a great lady and we're "dating". even she has reservations about marriage in general (not with me specifically). this is ok with me because a long term relationship does not have to include marriage. marriage comes into this picture because, basically, if you want to keep them in the states and have the freedom to travel abroad, well, there isn't anything much better than an american passport.

i'll go into this in more detail when i am home, but i am in tver now. i met richard (rvrwind). he's a nice guy, seems like fun..  easy to talk to. he and another member here have warned me about behappy, telling me they are the biggest scam agency in tver. they say the agency sends letters not sent by the ladies. when you arrive, you'll be surprised how many ladies are in crimea or out of town. well, i have met three ladies and one was a former ms. khasakstan. i have not had a problem with them so i am going to remain neutral but it would not surprise me if they do frabricate letters. but i have seen "mostly" good agencies do this (cindy agency, caught red-handed when a lady i already knew sent me a "first" letter)  we could debate this, i think bottom line it is, of course, deceptive but, if a guy writes back (i'm sure the agency edits any reply to make it look like a first letter to the lady) and the lady becomes interested, well, maybe it isn't such a bad thing. BUT, there has to be real letters and communication once they get the ball rolling. they cannot keep fabricating letters back and forth. i can see where once a guy writes back, and the agency forwardss it to the lady and then real correspondence is the result, well, maybe it isn't such a bad thing afterall. i think the real problem is when the agency continues to fabricate the letters and the guy is totally wasting his time. if an agency sent me a bogus letter and i wrote back, and then the real writing beginnings..  and you meet and hit it off, well, i wouldn't be pissed at the agency for giving us the nudge to get things started. still, of course it is deceptive and that of course bothers me.

now back to "when you meet her, you will know". i met "ms. khasakstan" at the agency but there was this beautiful girl that was to be our interpreter. she was, in my eyes, "perfect" absolutely no reservations about anything concerning her appearance. i was thunderstruck, hit like a lightning bolt, much like michael corelone was in "the godfather" when he met appolina while hiding out in scilily. we (the three of us) spent four hours at a japanese restaurant. i was far more interested in my interpreter than the sweet and pretty but not as "perfect" ms. khasakstan. the problem? she has a boyfriend who, as i was told by another interpreter, intends to marry her someday. what a bummer!

i managed to make it happen that my date was dropped off at her flat first. i had told my interpreter i want to talk to her. i got her into the back seat with me and just flat out told her the truth and how i feel. i told her i have met a lot of ladies, that she is perfect, i never felt this way before and i would stop my search now, come back in may and spend a month or two with her. i also told her i understand and respect her situation. i asked her, that if anything happens, please contact me, i'll come back for her.
doubt it will ever happen, but i walked to the internet cafe where i am now (it's 1:20am) just cussing out loud about my rotten luck, the girl i finally meet, who in my eyes seems perfect is TAKEN. this is the freaking story of my life.
but, as little jimmy scott sings, i'll just keep holding on.

i have to put it out of my mind and keep looking but i just feel like shi*. i have put a lot of time and effort into this. each and every woman, there was just something about them, even "o", that i could not say "she is perfect".
this lady is. of course i realize i do not know her that well and maybe time togehter would prove something unbearable but dang it, i doubt it.

so this is the story of my life. i have to keep looking.


Offline TigerPaws

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« Reply #43 on: April 05, 2005, 12:43:54 PM »
anono,

 What ever you do, do not compromise on your core wants, needs and desires for a lady to be with and listen to that little voice that sometimes warns all of us that something is just not right. If you begin to have second thoughts about a lady it is often best to simply walk away and cut your losses before digging a hole too deep to easily get out of.

 

Offline tim 360

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« Reply #44 on: April 05, 2005, 05:06:32 PM »
One should not be surprised that a "perfect" girl there also has a local guy who wants to marry her.  This is normal.  The "pre-fab" first letters?  I think they are part and parcel of "creative match-making" and revenue stream for agencies.  Good luck, Tim
"Never argue with a fool,  onlookers may not be able to tell the difference".  Mark Twain

Offline jb

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« Reply #45 on: April 05, 2005, 05:15:06 PM »
On a dare, I registered with the "Behappy" agency, I filled out the questionaire with such false tidbits as "85 years old", needing to meet "toothless old babuskas", and other non-data... My inbox is daily flooded with profiles from 20 y.o.'s.  In my opinion BeHappy of Tver is certainly a scam agency.  I wouldn't trust these people any farther than I could throw them.
« Last Edit: April 05, 2005, 05:36:00 PM by jb »

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« Reply #46 on: April 05, 2005, 09:15:10 PM »
Anono,

Have followed your quest quite some time now.  Quite honestly I think you are working too hard for something that has always been quite elusive for 'men'kind.

Sort of like old times when I told myself I'll just go out and find a date tonight.  The harder I tried the more fruitless these ventures were.

By now you've got your feet planted and are familiar enought to navigate better than most of us.  Take a break for a couple days or if you can a week and just relax, enjoy the scenery, get off the beaten path and just keep an eye out for opportunities - I assure you there are plenty there.

I remember walking down the street one day many years ago and almost bumped into a woman walking out of a store.  Eye contact like you would not believe. A bit shell shocked, I excused myself and went on my way but the incident bugged me for many months and I swore I would not pass up such an opportunity again. It's those fleeting few seconds you need to be looking for. Meeting my wife three years ago was one of those unexpected moments..





Offline anono

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« Reply #47 on: April 05, 2005, 10:17:24 PM »
good advice BC.

i just left the office this morning. the interpreter was there. looked even better than last night. had her hair pulled back. asked her if i could take some photos. went outside, took some pics, asked about her boyfriend.

here's the scoop..  the guy is a student (she's young). but also works at a bar.  i'm not about to tell the lady he prolly has a different girl every night or at the very least, has a few one nighters or a few other secret girlfriends. i doubt things are that much different here, but back in the states i had a few friends who were bartenders. one of the things they try to keep secret from the general public is all the women they are screwing. i could change this ladies life beyond her imagaination (not that i am rich, i'm not) but, i am sure she would have a far better and more fun life with me than any guy working in a bar in russia. in fact, i think it is only a matter of time before she finds out what is really going on, but at the same time these guys back home had girlfriends that seemed to just choose to look the other way, ignore the obvious and married them or continued with them anyway. part of it might be wanting a guy they know all the other girls want. anyway, BC, if i let this, i can let this bother me for months. unless i get REAL LUCKY, it'll be a long time before i meet someone that hits me like this lady. i want to beg and plead and offer her anything but i have too much pride to do that and i am realistic enough to know it will not matter anyway. i would just end up looking silly and maybe even crazy. i told the woman how i feel and that's all i can do.

jb, what you say is amazing. can you see your profile? did they leave it that way?  i do not get a lot of letters from behappy but i was also skeptical of the ages. yet here i am and i have a meeting tonight with a 19 year old that "apparently" wrote to me. i make it a point to ask these ladies why they wrote to me and so far they all seem as if they did in fact write. i am going beyond my age restrictions (i TRY to keep it 25 and up) but, damn it, she is hot. this interpreter is also 19 but you would never know it. they are just much more mature than the typical 19-21yr old AW. i work out and the sole reason i do is so i can keep up for as long as possible with any lady regardless of age. part of my routine if i ever bring one home will to work  out, ride bicycles and generally do things that keep me in good condition. jb, maybe you are getting flooded with letters because they are calling your bluff?  i do not know what is going on, but so far, on the surface and just below it, this all seems legit to me. to be fair, richard did tell me that when anastasia took over, john or someone ordered the girls to start fabricating letters. the story is the girls refused and quit. but, richard woked there and (i'm told) was fired and then he worked for LTP and was fired there too. he told me his side of the story, i listen to people but i also remember that he left on bad terms and may have other reasons to say these things but at the same time i would not be surprised at all if it's the truth. (if you are reading richard, i hope you understand i am just trying to be fair.) i will ask the lady tonight if she wrote to me. if i could talk to the interpreter i am in love with (  ;-)  ) i would ask her if she or anyone in the office is fabricating letters. as tim says, it is probably part and parcel of a lot of these agencies. but as i said in my previous post, maybe it isn't such a bad thing if it simply gets the ball rolling and real correspondence is a result. if i knew they were fabrication second and all subsequent letters and replies, i would be the first to attack and help take down an agency.

speaking of agencies, richard wants (and is going to) start up his own agency. he tells me that if i buy any addresses, to then go through him for translation and all the other logistical support. he says no one is going to get fabricated letters from him. if i do start anything up with any of the ladies here, i will go through richard for any follow up if i need any help.

i will "build a monument" to myself in this part so maybe you might want to stop reading, but i am getting along well with all these people. the girls like me, they all want to see me again. i am cofident, my sense of humor comes to the surface more easily. i walked up to the office yesterday and some gilrs were standing outside including my first interpreter (not the one i am in love with..lol) she told me the lady talking to another lady just behind her "wants" me. i asked who is she (she is a very good looking 30yr old) but she has a child and i've been down that road before. i have nothing against a lady with a child but i do want a woman w/o any children. as soon as i see a lady has a child, regardless of how attractive, i delete the letter without reading it. i simply do not want to deal with the added complications this brings. if i want to start  a family, i want the child to be mine. i know women put their children first. my mom would dump my stepdad in a heartbeat if it meant us (her seven children, three by him) or him. so if i am going to play second to a child, i want to be second to my own child, not someone else's. also, in the unlikely event that a child turns out to be a monster, i want the child to be my monster. i would have a very difficult time raising or putting up with some other guys monster. i would resent the entire situation. i do have a slight leniency towrds a daughter because most of the ladies have little girls that are just wonderful kids. anyway, when i went to the office today, i was told i have a 6pm date with the lady with the child. i politely declined, told them i think she is a very attractive lady, probabaly a very nice lady, but i am not interested in dating a woman with a kid. i told them i hate to hurt anyone's feelings. but i know in my heart i would be wasting both of our time.

i have most of the day to kill because these ladies are working or otherwise occupied during the day. i have another lady recommended by one of the guys here, but i leave tomorrow so i hope i can meet with her. if not, i am coming back in may. this city is full fo beautiful women. anyone who thinks tver is "fished out" has other problems or reasons for saying so..this place is FULL of good looking women. better tham walking down khresatick in kiev. i think most of these cities have a good number of beauties, some better than others. but i have never been anywhere and thought "just a bunch of dogs here".

jb, i'll try and get this lady out of my head and not ruin things for me, but i almost feel like giving up, i met her and she is taken. but i know better. one good thing is, i am returning to kiev friday and then to the USA sunday (spending my 49th birthday on a transatlantic flight. whoopee!)

i guess i can look at it this way. since i am flying "backwards into time" it'll be a 34 hour day instead of a 24 hour day....

this will give me a break, time to get things done back home and prepare for yet another trip back. i will return to tver. i have a few hot prospects, quite a few in kharkov and a few other ukrainian cities, several in st. petersburg, one in gomel and a few in lithunania (sp). gomel is not far from kiev, lithuania has some great port (resort) towns and what the hell, i've never been ther before. may as well add it to my ever growing list of countries. been to so many since i was 18 i lost count, but i do know i have been to five of the seven continents.

my search continues.

Offline anono

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« Reply #48 on: April 06, 2005, 12:19:01 AM »
for some reason, this computer does not give me the choice of my favorite font so i'll have to live with this..

i went back to behappy and talked to john about fabricating letters. i told him about what jb had to say and he says "it's automated". he went on to explain, a lot of these ladies will not write someone. so they use the parameters given by the lady (such as less than 30) and apparently, the system will send out the intro letter these ladies will write at the office to the profiles that match their requirements.

i send out a intro letter. i am not going to rewrite the same information each time i write to a lady for the first time. it would be a huge waste of time and the information is going to be the same. i just type in the ladies name a few places in the intro letter and send it. if and when they write back, i then write a fresh reply. any guy who has a problem with the ladies doing the same thing needs to rethink this. these ladies do not have the time most of you keyboard cowboys have, they are not 40-50year olds sitting at home in their underwear with all the time on their hands to scour the internet and write people. these ladies are either going to school and or working. they are lucky if they have time to come into an agancy office once a week, many times they do not come in at all unless the agency calls them and tells them they have a letter. so anyone who thinks that if a lady is sending the same letter to several men is a scammer, well, they are no more a scammer than i am.

this may explain why you are getting all these letter jb. your parameters may be so broad that you get letters from all the ladies at behappy. the system may recognize only the age range and the ladies are not looking at your profile. they do not have access to computers like we do, they do not have the time to browse all the profiles. actually, i see nothing wrong with this. if your profile fits the parameters desired by the lady, i do not see a problem with the system sending a letter to those profiles.
i get letters from ladies younger than those i specify in my profile, but those seem to be real letters sent by those ladies who have taken the time to read or find my profile. i have yet to receive a letter from a lady with a child because i specify in my profile that i do not want to meet a lady with children. perhaps this system recognizes that parameter and ladies with children who do see my profile do not write because i state i do not want to meet those ladies. maybe the younger girls below my started age range think i will make an exception and i will.

i have no real clue who is doing what but i am trying to be fair to everyone based on the facts as i uncover them. what john tells me seems reasonable. it does not seem to me that it is a scam. jb, you might want to write back to some of these replies and see what happens. of all the woman who have wrritten to me, those that can meet me do. i gave behappy about a days notice that i was even going to go to tver. with so little time to know i was coming, they have done a very good job of arrainging meeting with those who are able. remember also that i am here for only three days. when i arrived here, there was a lady waiting for me in the offic that had been waiting 45 minutes. i'm told most leave after 20 minutes if the guy doesn't show. again, these ladies have lives, unlike a lot of the keyboard cowboys here. (not picking on you jb). i just think a lot of us jump to conclusions without knowing all the facts. i'll say it again, i do not se a problem with agencies trying to drum up business. i told john, what if i replied to an automated letter, the girl likes my profile and writes back...i end up coming to tver, she meets me and we hit it off. if it was the interpreter i have been talking about, i'd be the happiest guy in the world. i'd prolly plunk down a grand on whoever hooks me up. it would save me a lot of money in the long run. this searching is not cheap.

i am just trying to give a balanced reason why some agencies may send out intro letters to profiles that fit the parameters of the ladies. if they continued to fabricate letters after the intro letter, this would be a different story.

Offline Bruce

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« Reply #49 on: April 06, 2005, 01:36:18 AM »
Tver as a city never was "fished out."   However, in the not too recent past only one agency existed in town, LTP, and at the time they had more guys coming over than the ability to recruit quality replacements for them.  So, if a guy was going to Tver and using an agency he was for the most part SOL.  Maybe Marc Dayton could give us some of the background. 

Then Behappy opened its doors and they were a breath of fresh air.  Behappy went on a recruiting frenzy and just had way more eligible pretty girls on their books than LTP.  Soon girls joined both agencies so LTP and Behappy had alot of the same girls, but Behappy had more girls.  So, the guys went through Behappy.  Behappy bent over backwards to help guys in Tver, so of course guys kept on working with Behappy.  Richard worked with Behappy when I met my wife going through Behappy in Tver.  He along with their owner Yaroslav were instrumental in keeping my big head on straight because I had met so many beautiful woman at the time who seemed interested in me on my short trip I had a hard time focusing at all, so I thank them for helping me keep away from the youngins.  Unfortunately, the almighty dollar is such a powerful thing.  Anastasia somehow came into Behappy's life, the tours started and I do not believe they ever looked back.  We would have to hear from Yaroslav or John, but I believe the "Anastasia style" (automated response) correspondence in part took place because so many keyboard romeos would write their girls, promise them everything in the world and never show up.  This kind of American behavior helped turn off alot of good girls.  I believe their answer was automated response.  I believe this is highly unethical and flat out wrong!  Since I met my wife I have had no dealings with Behappy other than to stop in to the office one time and say hello - where the office staff was completely changed over and nobody even knew me until one of my old interpreters came in to greet me.  So, despite the help they gave me I can not longer recommend them.  Generating phony letters and participating in tours just goes over the edge making a previously good agency bad in my book.  Never the less, I am sure they are laughing all the way to the bank.

There is another agency in Tver called Tverromance which was founded by the interpreters who left LTP and formed their own agency.  I have no idea about their agency practices but they do not seem to have too many lookers on their website.

LTP from what I understand was completely redone and understands that they actually have to advertise / recruit women since Marc Dayton took over.  I know they have alot of pretty girls on their books who were screened for character and whatever else LTP tries to do to make sure they are good girls.  Once Richard has an agency that will be a fourth in Tver.  Richard is a good guy who is on the ground and is determined to do things right.  So, I think his agency will eventually be major competition for the other agencies.

With 5 major Universities Tver can handle the agencies as far as number of girls.  Can the agencies actually recruit and hold the girls?  In any event the talent exists in the city.  A guy could meet girls on his own in Tver.  It is a language center so alot of girls are learning English if you have a huge language barrier.  For a guy with a tight schedule an agency can make things much easier if it is a good one.  The problem for an agency is the dilemma of making money while still remaining "good." 

Anno - glad you have more possibilites and appreciate the current on the ground information / interaction with one of the big dating agencies in Tver.  Who knows, your interpreter may come around by May.  Funnier things have happened.  I always recommend a guy seriously only considers girls at a minimum of 22 and older, but there is no hard and fast rule.  The FSU has alot of pretty girls, bottom line. 

« Last Edit: April 06, 2005, 01:43:00 AM by Bruce »
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

 

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