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Author Topic: 2nd Time Newbie  (Read 12689 times)

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Offline MoCowboy

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2nd Time Newbie
« on: February 02, 2009, 11:08:58 AM »
 :cluebat:

Greetings!!
I belonged to this forum about 2006 i believe it was. I must say, I did learn a LOT! A lot of interesting, helpful, and useful information, and a lot from some men that had married women from the middle east. Sadly to say, I did not learn my lesson about american women.
So, send me a few smacks. I was a widower when i joined here, and believed the lies i was told by an american woman, and ended up scammed worse than anything i have read from any foreign scams!!  Needless to say, the divorce is proceeding nicely as she faces some nice felony criminal charges. (embezzlement, perjury, etc.)

Anyways, I am back, and this time, to TRULY learn. When the time comes, i will seek my wife from eastern Europe. (Russia).
So, am back to square one. taking slow cautious baby steps. And starting all over from square one.

 :cluebat:

Any suggestions?
I live in a small rural community, (4500) about 120 miles south of a major metropolis, (Kansas City) and 35 minutes from an actual city...(joplin)
I think my biggest obstacle i had before, was that i do live in a rural area. And most ladies are more used to larger cities.  Where as, my business and family are here for at least the next 9 years.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Offline Daveman

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #1 on: February 02, 2009, 11:21:09 AM »
Welcome (again) Mocowboy.

Granted, most English speaking Russian ladies will be in/near the larger cities, but with a patient search, you can find exactly what you're looking for (and you'll be exactly what she's looking for).

The main problems, I think, that you will face by living in a rural area is that firstly, some ladies have a disdain for "Villages" and feel themselves superior, in education, in etiquette, etc., to those who live there.  Secondly will be the isolation problem. If she's a social creature, she can feel isolated.  Thirdly, she's used to being able to walk to the Supermarket, or catch public transportation so she'll go from being independent to completely dependent for a while and this can be a scary prospect.  Stress the need for driving in America and the absolute necessity for learning how.

The perfect match for rural living would be a lady who is from a rural area there, however, you'll find there are other obstacles trying to find one matching you.

If she truly loves you... her home will be with you, not with a city.. however, you will have to take into consideration the situation from her side and take steps to make her life comfortable and fulfilled in your area.

Welcome aboard (again)
Dave
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline Simoni

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #2 on: February 02, 2009, 11:29:11 AM »

The main problems, I think, that you will face by living in a rural area is that firstly, some ladies have a disdain for "Villages" and feel themselves superior, in education, in etiquette, etc., to those who live there. 

This is a real issue that you will have to live with.  It is true that city girls look down on people from villages.  And even big towns in the US are considered as a village!

Sure, you might find a big city girl willing to move out to the country.  But it will be difficult.  So my recommendation is not to even fight it, but to focus your search on rural or remote areas in the fsu.  I have one friend here who did just that, and she is happy now living here in the country with him on 25 acres of land, with no neighbors and the nearest store 15 minutes away by car.  My wife would NOT be happy in that situation; she is from a city of a million and a half.

Good luck!

~Si

Offline MoCowboy

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #3 on: February 02, 2009, 11:33:34 AM »
Thank you Dave!!

I have thought many long hours on those very issues.
Currently, I do live in town.  I do belong to several organizations here locally. I have spoken with some of the guys here I associate with, and fish, and go to lodge with etc. As well as their significant others. I must say, I do happen to have a great support system between friends and family here that have stated they would more than welcome a foreign woman, and would do everything they can to make her feel comfortable, and at home here. Such as family socials that are on average 4-5 a year. (where EVERYONE shows up...friends and family) and or anything she might need.  I know and understand it would be quite a bit new, and a shock to her...but as i said, i have a great support system here. There is always something going on that I seem to be involved in. Activities, poker runs, (yes I drive a motorcycle also) charity events, etc.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Offline Daveman

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #4 on: February 02, 2009, 11:42:21 AM »
No Problem Mo, glad to help where I can.. but I must tell you that I'm not married and have NO experience as of yet first hand with the problems you can encounter in this situation.  I'm good at finding ladies, but that's the extent of my real experience.  I think you mostly need to listen to the advice of the married guys here (not that I'm completely full of crap, though I'm sure some would debate that point, but I just don't know nearly enough to really help you). 

Simoni above, and others speak from experience of having made the transition.  Their words can be golden treasures if you pay attention.



The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline MoCowboy

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #5 on: February 02, 2009, 11:44:05 AM »
So very true dave. So very true...
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Offline SMS60

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #6 on: February 02, 2009, 12:48:43 PM »
MoCowboy

I would not worry about it ( unless you live in the middle of Big Sky country). When you start your search just be up front about where you live. Dont change your way of life for the women.

I think there is a big misconception about this issue from both the men and women.

Most of the women who have never been to the US don't understand the infrastructure it has. Most US cities of 200,000 or more have almost everything a huge city like Moscow offers. They dont realize you can live in the country and be in the downtown district of a large city in 30 minutes. You can live on a farm and make it to the opera house faster than they can get to the street, subway, train or vehicle in the burbs of Moscow.

Of course this is capable because of the automobile and good traffic flow. If they dont drive they must be willing to learn.
Quote from: Simoni on Today at 09:06:15 AM
But my understanding is that "Anything Goes" does not really mean "anything" if that "anything" violates the TOS.

Offline Lee08

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #7 on: February 02, 2009, 01:22:42 PM »
Hello Mocowboy,

I wouldn't worry about it either. Like you, I'm from a small rural community about the same size of yours with a bigger city (about 100,000 people) 40 minutes away. My fiancee and I are in the K-1 visa process now. She's from Moscow and has lived there all her life. She has no problems with where we are going to live here and she's looking forward to a more laid back lifestyle and learning how to drive. She even likes to joke sometimes about moving to a "village".
I have showed her many photos and home movies of where I live so she would basically know what its like.
It's possible her perception of things could change after she arrives here, but I believe she loves me enough that it woudn't matter to her if we lived anywhere in the world. Every woman is different, but I believe it all comes down to the right woman for you. If you find the right woman, even in a big city like Moscow, I believe things like this won't really matter.


Offline Simoni

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #8 on: February 02, 2009, 01:35:00 PM »
Missouri Cowboy,

I do love rural Missouri.  But I'm not an fsu girl.

My advice remains to look outside the cities of the FSU for your girl.

And BTW--  a town of 200,000 in the fsu is a village.

Cities are BIG there.



Offline Gator

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #9 on: February 02, 2009, 02:26:36 PM »
Most of the women who have never been to the US don't understand the infrastructure it has.

Correct.  You should have stopped there.

Quote
Most US cities of 200,000 or more have almost everything a huge city like Moscow offers.



Obviously, you have never spent time in Moscow. 

Quote
You can live on a farm and make it to the opera house faster than they can get to the street, subway, train or vehicle in the burbs of Moscow.

Ditto (plus what's wrong with that picture...farm...opera house?).  Actually, I found that few RW attend opera regularly.

My wife thinks Tampa Bay is a "lovely village"  (Tampa SMSA population 1.5 million).

« Last Edit: February 02, 2009, 02:28:16 PM by Gator »

Offline groovlstk

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #10 on: February 02, 2009, 02:45:23 PM »
Most US cities of 200,000 or more have almost everything a huge city like Moscow offers. They dont realize you can live in the country and be in the downtown district of a large city in 30 minutes. You can live on a farm and make it to the opera house faster than they can get to the street, subway, train or vehicle in the burbs of Moscow.

My wife is a native Muscovite and we live on the outskirts of Manhattan, and I still get complaints that Manhattan isn't half the city that Moscow is. I'm sure most of this is pride talking, but I will say that you're gravely mistaken if you think any Russian city dweller will find similar or equivalent offerings in small US cities.

Offline Simoni

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #11 on: February 02, 2009, 03:12:02 PM »
Keep in mind that the fsu cities are big, dense, and have mass transit.   Girls typically living in block long buildings that house 300 families.  The streets are filled with people, and activity.

Girls are used to hopping on a marshrutka and going to the city center to walk around, meet friends for coffee at a moment's notice, drop by their apt., etc.

Farm life is a FAR cry from this.

Good luck!


« Last Edit: February 02, 2009, 03:55:10 PM by Simoni »

Offline Gator

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #12 on: February 02, 2009, 04:32:37 PM »
I have showed her many photos and home movies of where I live so she would basically know what its like.
It's possible her perception of things could change after she arrives here, but I believe she loves me enough that it woudn't matter to her if we lived anywhere in the world.

Lee, congratulations on your engagement.  It sounds as if you are explaining the situation correctly.  I trust you did not tell her that she will find just a short drive away everything that she could find in Moscow.


Quote

She has no problems with where we are going to live here and she's looking forward to a more laid back lifestyle and learning how to drive.



Many of these RW have spent time at a dacha and some do enjoy that life.  I suggest that she learn how to drive in Moscow and obtain her international driver's license. Having mobility is important to adjustment.  Few RW will be content staying at home all day and watching squirrels.  Also, I understand it really tests the strength of the marriage for a husband to teach a RW wife how to drive.





Offline ScottinCrimea

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #13 on: February 02, 2009, 04:49:55 PM »
Thank you Dave!!

I have thought many long hours on those very issues.
Currently, I do live in town.  I do belong to several organizations here locally. I have spoken with some of the guys here I associate with, and fish, and go to lodge with etc. As well as their significant others. I must say, I do happen to have a great support system between friends and family here that have stated they would more than welcome a foreign woman, and would do everything they can to make her feel comfortable, and at home here. Such as family socials that are on average 4-5 a year. (where EVERYONE shows up...friends and family) and or anything she might need.  I know and understand it would be quite a bit new, and a shock to her...but as i said, i have a great support system here. There is always something going on that I seem to be involved in. Activities, poker runs, (yes I drive a motorcycle also) charity events, etc.

It's great that you have so many activities in your small town to keep you interested and busy, but what is there for HER to do?  What types of activities does she enjoy and are they available there?  We are fortunate that our city library has a nice section of Russian language books and some local Russian shops.  Are those things available anywhere near you?  I don't know many RW who are content to just sit at home for long.

She may enjoy the family socials, but maybe not.  My wife's entire extended family consists of only her parents, so she is unaccostumed to and a bit uncomfortable at my family gatherings (I come from a uite large family).

As much as everyone says they will welcome her and try to make her feel at home, you face a couple of dilemmas.  One is that she might feel smothered initially.  The other is that she may feel like she is in a zoo, with everyone wanting to get a look at "that Russian gal".  Unless there are significant numbers of foreign women in your area, she will be a novelty, and she will feel this (not in a good way).  I have spent time living in small towns and I know how many react to new people in town, especially if they are different in any way.  If she is good looking in any way, there can be some jealousy among the local women who may feel threatened when seeing the husbands compare her to their own wive's meat and potatoes bodies.

No question it is more difficult in a small town and you have more obstacles to overcome.  It just adds a few more challenges to her integration into her new life.  If you are both committed to each other, though, these can be overcome.  The number one thing you can do for her is to have patience and be supportive as she adjusts.

Offline Misha

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #14 on: February 02, 2009, 07:48:34 PM »
Welcome! For what it is worth, I will share my personal experience. My wife came from a mid-sized city in Russia (roughly a quarter of a million people). My city is small (less than one hundred thousand). My wife never complains that the city is too small. Why? Well, she likes to do outdoor things. Yesterday, for example, we rented snowshoes and went on a trek through the forest. We went down one hill and went back up. All told, we spent two hours trekking through the snow and the forest. She loved it. It would be hard to do the same thing in Manhattan.

In the summer, I have over 100 km (60 miles) of bike trails behind my work that crisscross the forest. At first, my wife was nervous that we might meet some bears in the trails, but she quickly got over that and has taken up mountain biking with a passion. Likewise, we can drive an hour out of our city and find at least a dozen lakes where we can camp and hike and ride our bikes. Try to do that when you live in downtown Miami.

Simply put, not all RW are cut from the same cloth. Find a woman whose lifestyle and interests match yours. Find the woman who loves camping and gardening and avoid those whose first true love is shopping  :rolleyes2: It can be done, it is a matter of knowing what to look for and what to avoid.

Offline Lee08

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #15 on: February 02, 2009, 08:31:55 PM »
Lee, congratulations on your engagement.  It sounds as if you are explaining the situation correctly.  I trust you did not tell her that she will find just a short drive away everything that she could find in Moscow.


Thank you Gator.
Actually the things she likes to do and the places she likes to visit is just a short drive away.


Many of these RW have spent time at a dacha and some do enjoy that life.  I suggest that she learn how to drive in Moscow and obtain her international driver's license. Having mobility is important to adjustment.  Few RW will be content staying at home all day and watching squirrels.  Also, I understand it really tests the strength of the marriage for a husband to teach a RW wife how to drive.


I did suggest this to her at one time and she didn't want anything to do with it in Moscow. I can't blame her. I've been driving many, many years and I WOULD NOT attempt driving in Moscow Russia. People here think road rage is bad; they haven't seen road rage.

Offline UTRO

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #16 on: February 02, 2009, 08:40:08 PM »
Common' now Lee, you know that your Fiancee is going to miss the Moscow Metro, as you most certainly will(not)!! ;)
Oh... and the worst thing you can ever do to a relationship is teach your Wife to drive!! Leave this to the Professionals :)
Dave.

« Last Edit: February 02, 2009, 08:52:23 PM by Utrobina »



Offline Daveman

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #17 on: February 02, 2009, 08:48:44 PM »


I did suggest this to her at one time and she didn't want anything to do with it in Moscow. I can't blame her. I've been driving many, many years and I WOULD NOT attempt driving in Moscow Russia. People here think road rage is bad; they haven't seen road rage.

Yeah, and in Ukraine, I'm still not completely convinced they understand the actual concept of a road! Seems to be broadly defined at the very least.  We call it a sidewalk - there it's a road.  We call it a Playground -- well, there it's a road.  We call it the 4th floor of an apartment building - there -- well you get the idea.  We call it the Lunar Surface -- yep, you guessed it...
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline Lee08

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #18 on: February 02, 2009, 09:07:05 PM »
Common' now Lee, you know that your Fiancee is going to miss the Moscow Metro, as you most certainly will(not)!! ;)


Hey Dave!
I hope to see you in Moscow again soon!
I've spent many miles on that metro, and it's not that bad unless you get caught at rush hour and they start pushing you out the other side >:(

Natasha??  I can say, lets go shopping, and her reply, "I don't want to ride the metro today".  ;D

Offline GoodOlBoy

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #19 on: February 02, 2009, 09:19:56 PM »
The other is that she may feel like she is in a zoo, with everyone wanting to get a look at "that Russian gal". 

 :)


GOB
“For God and country, Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo......... Geronimo E.K.I.A.”

Offline Daveman

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #20 on: February 03, 2009, 01:47:18 PM »

Simply put, not all RW are cut from the same cloth. Find a woman whose lifestyle and interests match yours. Find the woman who loves camping and gardening and avoid those whose first true love is shopping  :rolleyes2: It can be done, it is a matter of knowing what to look for and what to avoid.

And that's the trick.  Which is why I first said to pay attention to the married guys who have made the transition already.  Almost all the married guys are giving you the cautionary warning, while the ones who haven't made the transition yet (no offense guys) are giving you more of the rah rah, but really don't know first hand yet what'll really happen.

So, here's one example of a successful transition to a situation similar to your own, but she's from a smaller area more closely matching his.  I'd pay close attention to this... really.  Love is one thing when it's all fluffy and pink , but when reality sets in, "I can't live like this!" could be a real deal.  Easier to find in big cities for sure, but perhaps it's better to trod off the beaten path. 

The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline UTRO

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #21 on: February 03, 2009, 06:56:36 PM »

Hey Dave!
I hope to see you in Moscow again soon!
I've spent many miles on that metro, and it's not that bad unless you get caught at rush hour and they start pushing you out the other side >:(

Natasha??  I can say, lets go shopping, and her reply, "I don't want to ride the metro today".  ;D

Lyndal, it was great seeing you once again in Moscow!
For those who don't know, Lee08 and I had hoped to meet one another at SVO II this past July. It was his first trip to the Motherland. Unfortunately we determined beforehand that our planes were going to land about 4 hours appart, so we gave up the idea. Well as it happened, two days later on one bright sunny July Saturday afternoon in Moscow, while Sveta and I were wandering around the the Souvenir stands in Red Square, I eyed a guy wearing a ballcap.. well baseball caps aren't really that common in Russia! I had no clue what Lee08' looked like.... So I went over to this guy and stood beside him trying to hear what language he was speaking to the vendors.... no luck, he said nothing. He was with a cute blonde haired girl who seemed to be guiding him around... I walked away frustrated and I said to Sveta, "I think that's Lyndal over there with that girl"! She said, "Dave how could it be with so many thousands of people here, but you know Dave, he definitely looks like a Tourist and even American??!!" Then she said, "Dave are you going to travel 7000km from Canada, see a guy that might be Lyndal and walk away never knowing it?!! She was of course right.... So, I walked back up to this stranger and said, "ahem Lee08... ah Lyndal from RWD?!?" Well this guy just froze and slowly looked around at me... "Dave?? ", he said quietly.... lol! Geeze, I don't think the two of us could believe it! One of the first things he asked me was if he stood out so obvious as an American! Of course I said no! ;) Then he went on to describe how he was pulled over, just minutes before, by the militia in Red Square and asked for his Passport and Registration!! Being a weekend he didn't have his Registration. They tried to give him a hard time but his Fiancee Natasha, the blonde, put them in their place!
Well, sorry to hijack this Thread... but I thought I should sometime tell this ironic story!!
Lee08, Lyndal, has since spent an amazing amount of time in Moscow since that first visit and has in fact visited a Russian Military Base without a Passport!!! But, I'll let Lyndal tell that incredible story!! Take Care Lyndal!!



Offline Lee08

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #22 on: February 03, 2009, 08:08:44 PM »
two days later on one bright sunny July Saturday afternoon in Moscow, while Sveta and I were wandering around the the Souvenir stands in Red Square, I eyed a guy wearing a ballcap.. well baseball caps aren't really that common in Russia! I had no clue what Lee08' looked like.... So I went over to this guy and stood beside him trying to hear what language he was speaking to the vendors.... no luck, he said nothing. He was with a cute blonde haired girl who seemed to be guiding him around... I walked away frustrated and I said to Sveta, "I think that's Lyndal over there with that girl"! She said, "Dave how could it be with so many thousands of people here, but you know Dave, he definitely looks like a Tourist and even American??!!" Then she said, "Dave are you going to travel 7000km from Canada, see a guy that might be Lyndal and walk away never knowing it?!! She was of course right.... So, I walked back up to this stranger and said, "ahem Lee08... ah Lyndal from RWD?!?" Well this guy just froze and slowly looked around at me... "Dave?? ", he said quietly.... lol! Geeze, I don't think the two of us could believe it! One of the first things he asked me was if he stood out so obvious as an American! Of course I said no! ;)


Hey Dave!!
You told the story quite well. It was crazy all of us running into each other that day. What was the chance? I've since been playing the lottery.  :D  But no luck yet. I'm going to need it after all these trips to Moscow.  :o


Lee08, Lyndal, has since spent an amazing amount of time in Moscow since that first visit and has in fact visited a Russian Military Base without a Passport!!! But, I'll let Lyndal tell that incredible story!! Take Care Lyndal!!


Oh geez, I'm trying to forget about that! I had no idea Natasha and her father were "sneeking me in" to visit her grandmother that lived on the base. I never been so nervous in my life, especially after I learned my passport was in Natasha's purse that she left at her Mother's flat! And all of this had to happen during the Georgia conflict ordeal. Thank God I made it out!! To you CIA members that may be here, I saw nothing!!!  8)

Talk to you soon Dave! I'm heading back to Moscow this Friday!!







Offline GoodOlBoy

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #23 on: February 03, 2009, 09:16:23 PM »
  Love is one thing when it's all fluffy and pink , but when reality sets in, "I can't live like this!" could be a real deal.  Easier to find in big cities for sure, but perhaps it's better to trod off the beaten path. 

OK after my last "soiree" with the "Anointed Ones" I was going to try and lay low, BUT, this topic has peaked my interest, so here goes.

I have seen, personally both sides of this "fence" (BIG CITY/small city). I don't have any empirical data to back up anything I am saying but I have countless encounters with RW/UW from my area and almost 4 great years of marriage to a wonderful RW.

I can state for the most part what Daveman is saying is TRUE.

Location, location, location is an important factor in choosing your lifetime mate.

Not only her location, but your location.

My wife is from Omsk. The population in Omsk is over 1 million.

Marina would not be happy in a farmhouse in the middle of Idaho. And yet another woman, a friend, who came from the same city as my wife is OK living in the Midwest, as a matter of fact the last 3 years she has been quite happy.

But on the other hand I have come in contact with several divorced RW/UW here in N. Miami and almost ALL of them have "migrated" from smaller cities to this area. Some have actually told me that besides their husbands "Bad Behavior" the location of his residence (village) was another factor in their decision to leave. To quote some of them: "I felt isolated from the world".

I guess what I am trying to tell anybody who is reading this. Be very careful and completely honest with the women you meet in the FSU.

Pictures and videos will NOT prepare her for the culture shock she is about to experience when she reaches your particular city.

I will say this also, keep your wife BUSY. As soon as she gets her "sea legs" under her, give her things to do (not just housework). It may sound silly but buy her a bicycle with a basket (my wife rode the back tire BALD on hers). Get her started on driving ASAP, show her your local library, take her to the YMCA, do as much as you can to keep her MIND and BODY busy.

If she just sits at home all day, there will be troubles on the horizon.

And for God sakes, if you get into deep trouble with your RW DON'T WAIT UNTIL IT IS TO LATE. Come here to RWD and PM somebody.

Yes you may have friends and relatives that know a lot about relationships, but ask yourself this: "Do they know anything about RW"?

There is years of experience on this forum and you never know, somebody here might be able to help you.


GOB
« Last Edit: February 03, 2009, 10:15:41 PM by GoodOlBoy »
“For God and country, Geronimo, Geronimo, Geronimo......... Geronimo E.K.I.A.”

Offline Simoni

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Re: 2nd Time Newbie
« Reply #24 on: February 03, 2009, 09:33:18 PM »
OK after my last "soiree" with the "Anointed Ones" I was going to try and lay low, BUT, this topic has peaked my interest, so here goes.

I hope newbies do listen to those who have been there, done that.

It would be a BIG mistake to try to take a lady out of a big FSI city (and they are almost always big), and put her into small town America.  Culture shock is a big enough factor already, without compounding it with isolation.

Consider this:


Girls are used to hopping on a marshrutka and going to the city center to walk around, meet friends for coffee at a moment's notice, drop by their apt., etc.

Girls in the FSU are used to easy access to friends and services.  Here in the USA, you have to work at it.  Also, FSU girls just don't "get it" about America's obsession with cars. Why does everyone drive a private car rather than walking or using mass transit?  It takes several years to adjust to the American mindset.

Misha shared his story; I think I should share the flipside of it:

My girl almost lost her mind the first year in the states, and we lived in a metro area of 4.5 million.  But it was too spread out, and she totally did not like the poor excuse that buses are for mass transit.  We lived in a nice gated community, with the skyline visible just 3 miles away. She complained about the lack of crowds and the absence of sidewalks when she went for walks outside the gated community.  She said we lived "in a village."

Now we live in the city center, and all is well.  We live in a condo with 250 families, and have dozens of restaurants within 3 blocks.  There are three theaters within a quarter mile walking distance, and a 5 mile embankment along the sea for walks.

She is happy, so I am happy.

I don't think I could ever move her to a rural area.  All I'm saying is that I think she is typical of girls who live in fsu cities. 

Thus, choose wisely and be sure they understand what they are marrying into.   OP, I'm not saying you should change your surroundings.   You should not.  I am saying you might strongly consider a girl who currently lives in surroundings similar to yours.  Thus, get far away from the big cities and concentrate your search there.


« Last Edit: February 03, 2009, 09:37:14 PM by Simoni »

 

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