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Author Topic: Arranging a meeting with Women  (Read 1050 times)

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Offline Surfer

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Arranging a meeting with Women
« on: June 11, 2018, 10:04:23 AM »
Hi All,

So I have learning from the more experienced members of this forum recently and improving my strategy. I appreciate you all.

Now, when I start talking to a girl in whom I am interested, I make my intentions clear in the beginning itself (first or second email) that I am here to look for the right woman for marriage and if there is a mutual like, I will get on a plane and absolutely visit.

I am using some of the advices I have received so far on this Forum to keep the conversations focused on the girl, getting to know her and keeping the calls short while regular.

How do you suggest to discuss meeting a girl after discovering a mutual like through Skype calls?

Should I just suggest something like: "I am very interested in you and I would like to take things further. I want to visit and meet you. What time works for you well (around which month or date)?"

Most of these girls have their own job and life. So, I don't expect them to take a holiday or any kind of vacation to meet up. I am alright to go and meet them after their working hours.

Do the women you meet make more time for you usually? Do they take holidays from work so that they are available to spend more time with you?

I have met girls through VK before and they used to make time by taking holidays or a short vacation so that they could spend the entire day with me. And I didn't even meet them for purpose of dating. They were friends and to a few of them I expressed my interest.

Is it similar with meeting girls through EM as well?

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #1 on: June 11, 2018, 01:19:53 PM »
Hi All,

So I have learning from the more experienced members of this forum recently and improving my strategy. I appreciate you all.

Now, when I start talking to a girl in whom I am interested, I make my intentions clear in the beginning itself (first or second email) that I am here to look for the right woman for marriage and if there is a mutual like, I will get on a plane and absolutely visit.

I am using some of the advices I have received so far on this Forum to keep the conversations focused on the girl, getting to know her and keeping the calls short while regular.

How do you suggest to discuss meeting a girl after discovering a mutual like through Skype calls?

Should I just suggest something like: "I am very interested in you and I would like to take things further. I want to visit and meet you. What time works for you well (around which month or date)?"

Most of these girls have their own job and life. So, I don't expect them to take a holiday or any kind of vacation to meet up. I am alright to go and meet them after their working hours.

Do the women you meet make more time for you usually? Do they take holidays from work so that they are available to spend more time with you?

I have met girls through VK before and they used to make time by taking holidays or a short vacation so that they could spend the entire day with me. And I didn't even meet them for purpose of dating. They were friends and to a few of them I expressed my interest.

Is it similar with meeting girls through EM as well?

On both questions yes, that has been exclusively so when I have had prearranged meetings with someone.
Even a couple of those I met on the spot have made time, called around to co-workers to cover for them and taken time some time, a shift, off work, to spend a whole day or so with me.
Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.

Offline Surfer

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #2 on: June 11, 2018, 01:49:26 PM »
On both questions yes, that has been exclusively so when I have had prearranged meetings with someone.
Even a couple of those I met on the spot have made time, called around to co-workers to cover for them and taken time some time, a shift, off work, to spend a whole day or so with me.

Thanks @Nightwish. Yes, I would expect the girl I am meeting to make time for me as well especially considering the fact that I am traveling to another country to meet her.

Offline ML

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #3 on: June 13, 2018, 09:54:14 AM »
Do the women you meet make more time for you usually? Do they take holidays from work so that they are available to spend more time with you?

This was one of the screening devices I used for my WMVM trips.
I  told the gals that our first meeting would take up a workday afternoon.
No first meetings in evenings or weekends.
So this gave an indication of the seriousness of their interest.
Those who insisted they could only meet in evenings or weekends . . . were dropped from my list.
I still like Ike.

Online LAman

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #4 on: June 13, 2018, 04:39:14 PM »
This was one of the screening devices I used for my WMVM trips.
I  told the gals that our first meeting would take up a workday afternoon.
No first meetings in evenings or weekends.
So this gave an indication of the seriousness of their interest.
Those who insisted they could only meet in evenings or weekends . . . were dropped from my list.

So in other words, a women had to 'pay' to meet with you.
Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #5 on: June 13, 2018, 04:42:24 PM »
I don't think the seriousness of a woman can be determined by how willing she is to miss an afternoon from work to meet with a WM.  I think that is very unfair to women, particularly in Ukraine.
To love someone means to see him as God intended him. - Fyodor Dostoevksy

Offline JayH

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #6 on: June 13, 2018, 05:51:45 PM »
So in other words, a women had to 'pay' to meet with you.
I don't think the seriousness of a woman can be determined by how willing she is to miss an afternoon from work to meet with a WM.  I think that is very unfair to women, particularly in Ukraine.

Agree with both posts.
Once again a long term senior poster giving incredibly dumb advice. Recently -- we have seen how dumb some are in seeking advice and how literally they interpret it.
In this case -- a girl working is being expected to commit prematurely. It may or may not be easy for a girl to get away during the day--or take a day off etc -that needs to be understood.
Even going out on a work night can have it's problems  eg work can start early and finish late for some .
The expectations of a girls employer is that her job is her priority -  and she will understand that extremely well.

I have said many times --a guy blundering into a girls life is inappropriate. Guys think because they are spending their time and their money that is all that matters .Guys need to think this through -- and understand her situation.
SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Online msmob

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #7 on: June 17, 2018, 01:01:28 AM »
No first meetings in evenings or weekends.
So this gave an indication of the seriousness of their interest.
Those who insisted they could only meet in evenings or weekends . . . were dropped from my list.


What a bizarre reason for 'exclusion'...hardly realistic or valid .

So, you were expecting women to take time off work..just to meet you on an off chance?

If you had built up a rapport, via Skype, I could understand...

Otherwise, I think this is the sort of advice to swiftly discount as your (very) unorthodox criteria.))

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Offline ML

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #8 on: June 17, 2018, 07:37:25 PM »
To add a bit of background to my 'dropping ladies who would only meet after work or weekends.'

1. My gals were 35-45 with professional jobs.  It was not at all difficult for them to take off from work anytime . . . if they wanted to.

2. I attained a full schedule of 12-20 gals to meet with on each trip.

3. As most of you know, I don't do repeated back and forths here.
I still like Ike.

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #9 on: June 18, 2018, 01:31:18 AM »
ML

Whilst I appreciate you might chose not to respond further, I STILL find your criteria to 'exclude' a working woman who wouldn't (couldn't?)  meet you during working hours as an inadvisible stance to others.

Meeting someone on a date you hardly know is akin to a pig in a poke - judging someone - negatively - because they prefer to meet in the evening isn't fair IMHO.



« Last Edit: June 18, 2018, 06:34:55 AM by msmob »
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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #10 on: June 18, 2018, 09:49:23 AM »

ML, if I remember correctly, you did fine meeting a lot of women. You can make whatever rules you want even if many disapprove. When a guy makes lots of rules before dating a woman and can't land a date, it's those guys that need to worry. Beggars can't be choosers.
Give a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #11 on: June 18, 2018, 01:10:26 PM »

2. I attained a full schedule of 12-20 gals to meet with on each trip.


That's pretty astounding ML, if I may ask, did you first message them before your trip or once you had arrived?

Offline ML

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #12 on: June 18, 2018, 01:51:40 PM »
That's pretty astounding ML, if I may ask, did you first message them before your trip or once you had arrived?

Everything is clearly laid out below . . . and you have known about that webpage and the procedures for several months (maybe years) by now.

Pursuing FSUW 101

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=14615.0
I still like Ike.

Online msmob

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #13 on: June 18, 2018, 02:24:42 PM »
You can make whatever rules you want even if many disapprove.

Who's saying ML couldn't make his own criteria ...? In my case, I question itt's advisability to those new to the game.

When a guy makes lots of rules before dating a woman and can't land a date, it's those guys that need to worry. Beggars can't be choosers.


As ever, without thinking - you 'back ME up' ... 'beggars can't be choosers' - so WHY would a 'beggar' set such a criteria ...?
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Online Trenchcoat

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #14 on: June 18, 2018, 02:54:35 PM »
Everything is clearly laid out below . . . and you have known about that webpage and the procedures for several months (maybe years) by now.

Pursuing FSUW 101

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=14615.0

Thanks ML, I forgot about that, got all the decent dating sites saved in my favourites bookmark so forgot about the other stuff. So looks like the problem I have is going out there/here and trying to do the internet game on the hoof.

The process you done looks the way to do the visit many then. I'm guessing you choose the 800 or so women within a certain large area or big cities to cut down on too much travelling or grouped the ones at the end missing out those that were far flung?

I guess its still a question of whether those girls had chemistry on meeting so still a bit hit & miss, hence the rinse & repeat as/if necessary. I know you've said in the end for you you found that there wasn't but met your wife as a business contact while over there. Its handy to know what o do though if wantng to do a visit many. I'm guessing the labour intensity is no less than visit one.

Offline Surfer

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #15 on: June 21, 2018, 02:39:00 PM »
Thanks all for the answers.

If you went exclusively to meet one FSU woman and you let her know in advance that you are coming there to meet her, do you discuss with her the duration of your stay? How long do you usually visit for? A couple of days or a week or more?

For example, one FSU woman told me, it would be great if I arrive on a Saturday. I can imagine that she said this so that we have the weekend with us. However, there was no discussion done about the number of days I will be there and so on.

Or maybe because it's the first meeting, so she would first like to meet in person and decide the rest?

And I am talking about cases where you have already communicated with the woman on a daily basis through texting/calling for around 2 weeks or up to a month before meeting. So, there's sufficient familiarity between the two of you.

Should I be telling her for how many days I plan to visit and if she will be available on the weekdays as well? Or everything will be decided after meeting in person?

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #16 on: June 21, 2018, 02:51:02 PM »
Thanks all for the answers.

If you went exclusively to meet one FSU woman and you let her know in advance that you are coming there to meet her, do you discuss with her the duration of your stay? How long do you usually visit for? A couple of days or a week or more?

For example, one FSU woman told me, it would be great if I arrive on a Saturday. I can imagine that she said this so that we have the weekend with us. However, there was no discussion done about the number of days I will be there and so on.

Or maybe because it's the first meeting, so she would first like to meet in person and decide the rest?

And I am talking about cases where you have already communicated with the woman on a daily basis through texting/calling for around 2 weeks or up to a month before meeting. So, there's sufficient familiarity between the two of you.

Should I be telling her for how many days I plan to visit and if she will be available on the weekdays as well? Or everything will be decided after meeting in person?

Most of my trips was WO, I was always clear about that and that I would stay for (most times) 4 days..
fly in on Thursday afternoon and leave Sunday morning. Sometimes Friday to Sunday.
These times was set by the Airline since I always used Ukr.Airlines and gave me the best value.

So all the ladies I visited (WO-trips) this was very aware when I would arrive and for how long I would be there beforehand.
Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.

Online msmob

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #17 on: June 21, 2018, 02:52:16 PM »
Most of my trips was WO, I was always clear about that and that I would stay for (most times) 4 days..
So all the ladies I visited (WO-trips) this was very aware when I would arrive and for how long I would be there beforehand.


Great advice

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #18 on: June 21, 2018, 04:23:03 PM »
Most of my trips was WO, I was always clear about that and that I would stay for (most times) 4 days..
fly in on Thursday afternoon and leave Sunday morning. Sometimes Friday to Sunday.
These times was set by the Airline since I always used Ukr.Airlines and gave me the best value.

So all the ladies I visited (WO-trips) this was very aware when I would arrive and for how long I would be there beforehand.

Must be nice to fly over for a weekend trip. ((((
Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #19 on: June 21, 2018, 06:30:36 PM »
If you went exclusively to meet one FSU woman and you let her know in advance that you are coming there to meet her, do you discuss with her the duration of your stay? How long do you usually visit for? A couple of days or a week or more?


An American should stay at least a week. You're a short flight over and can go there more often so a week isn't necessary. I usually go for 10 days.

Be honest with the lady how long you're staying. If you lie and you someday marry her and she looks in your passport, you're caught. If you tell her you're staying a week, it doesn't mean you will see her for a week. Be ready to dump her if things don't go well. Have a backup plan.
Give a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #20 on: June 21, 2018, 09:58:47 PM »
An American should stay at least a week. You're a short flight over and can go there more often so a week isn't necessary. I usually go for 10 days.

Be honest with the lady how long you're staying. If you lie and you someday marry her and she looks in your passport, you're caught. If you tell her you're staying a week, it doesn't mean you will see her for a week. Be ready to dump her if things don't go well. Have a backup plan.

LAman and BillyB make a good point re those travelling over longer distances.. I post my supporting Nightwish's 'tactic'  from a guy on the eastern side of the pond.

As for 'backup plans'

The only plan should be move on - if it's not working out - as I've pointed out before - I've seen an Aussie guy visit a lady in Siberia - the lady told V - "he doesn't do it for me" - but resolved to be a good hostess - for the 3 weeks he was staying - They have been married nearly 10 years.....





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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #21 on: Yesterday at 02:47:22 AM »
Must be nice to fly over for a weekend trip. ((((

Yes it has been just that, many short visits for just a weekend, I almost average one a month for the last 2 years.
Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #22 on: Yesterday at 08:41:35 AM »
I think that the very fact that this question is being asked is that it's not necessarily clear on here on the starting out sticky what the options are are what each entails. That this can be different for US guys than guys from the UK. i.e do you spam a load of girls & whittle them down or do you work your way through them. If your a guy in the UK do you go for a week, weekend - one meet or a series of meets etc.

When I started out up to this date I did a week or so not just to see the woman but also see what these places in the FSU were like and their culture. Now apart from wanting to see St. Pete's some time I would now be happy to do weekend meets such as Nightwish does I would be able to do two full days on the Saturday & Sunday. Though a lot of the girls are nice enough to spend more time with this helps limit time down so if it doesn't work out your not stuck in a bad situation for too long.

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #23 on: Yesterday at 10:49:30 AM »
I am using some of the advices I have received so far on this Forum to keep the conversations focused on the girl, getting to know her and keeping the calls short while regular.

How do you suggest to discuss meeting a girl after discovering a mutual like through Skype calls?

Should I just suggest something like: "I am very interested in you and I would like to take things further. I want to visit and meet you. What time works for you well (around which month or date)?"

Most of these girls have their own job and life. So, I don't expect them to take a holiday or any kind of vacation to meet up. I am alright to go and meet them after their working hours.

Do the women you meet make more time for you usually? Do they take holidays from work so that they are available to spend more time with you?

I have met girls through VK before and they used to make time by taking holidays or a short vacation so that they could spend the entire day with me. And I didn't even meet them for purpose of dating. They were friends and to a few of them I expressed my interest.

Is it similar with meeting girls through EM as well?

Everyone has their own style and do what you feel comfortable with. Personally I would
say something like

"You need to get extra sleep, plenty of stretching or yoga and lots of juice and tea. I will
be arriving in 3 weeks and you will need your strength"

or

"I am sending you a copy of my itinerary, and a link to the apartment I am renting.
If you follow the link you can see there is a large light fixture in the main room.
I want you to go buy a pair of sexy panties for when you meet me at the airport
or something that will look good hanging from that lamp." 

or you could write something more tame. They will want to spend as much time
with you as possible. They will tell you what arrangements they can make.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

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Re: Arranging a meeting with Women
« Reply #24 on: Yesterday at 02:16:11 PM »
"I am sending you a copy of my itinerary, and a link to the apartment I am renting.
If you follow the link you can see there is a large light fixture in the main room.
I want you to go buy a pair of sexy panties for when you meet me at the airport
or something that will look good hanging from that lamp." 

I actually experienced this.  The bedroom was once a dining room.  There was an elaborate chandelier over the bed.  The gal wanted to hang her panties there, and she wanted to use her foot to toss the panties up there while lying on her back.  It took her about 4 tries to get them hooked.
I still like Ike.

 

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