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Author Topic: Courting a Ukrainian Woman  (Read 4332 times)

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Offline civi68

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #25 on: November 25, 2021, 07:19:36 AM »
Chai, you are right in not committing to a trip unless you feel it will go somewhere. You need to see a few months of more commitment. When asking her about meeting on video, tell her you are interested in developing a relationship and want to talk to her at least once a week. Then, discuss a specific day to talk. If she says she is too busy, says yes but then backs out or over the next few months the video chats continue to be infrequent, her priorities are elsewhere so you need to look elsewhere.


   

Online John Gaunt

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #26 on: November 25, 2021, 11:10:00 PM »
Chai, you are right in not committing to a trip unless you feel it will go somewhere. You need to see a few months of more commitment. When asking her about meeting on video, tell her you are interested in developing a relationship and want to talk to her at least once a week. Then, discuss a specific day to talk. If she says she is too busy, says yes but then backs out or over the next few months the video chats continue to be infrequent, her priorities are elsewhere so you need to look elsewhere.


   
You canít develop a relationship online. Itíll only ever be an extension of being penpals.
To get to know someone multiple trips and in person meetings are necessary.
Of course, regular communication is also required to see a continued interest. If the girl isnít willing to talk/video chat then move on.

Offline 2tallbill

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #27 on: November 27, 2021, 02:16:59 PM »
Chai, you are right in not committing to a trip unless you feel it will go somewhere. You need to see a few months of more commitment. When asking her about meeting on video, tell her you are interested in developing a relationship and want to talk to her at least once a week. Then, discuss a specific day to talk. If she says she is too busy, says yes but then backs out or over the next few months the video chats continue to be infrequent, her priorities are elsewhere so you need to look elsewhere.

He has visited her but only had three live dates. He lives in Germany.
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

Offline 2tallbill

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Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #28 on: November 27, 2021, 02:44:40 PM »
Thanks for all the responses guys.

@ 2tallbill (it was me not Rosco) - The answers to your questions.
What is/was your plan for going back to Ukraine?

My plan was to go in Decmber during the Christmas vacations. She is an Orthodox so they celebrate Christmas on 7 Jan.

When you dated her in person, did you date others between dates 1 & 3?

yes, I did date 2 other women. As I mentioned I am skeptical to go to Ukraine and meet her just to find out that the visit was good but the followup is still bad. I dont know about asserting my point at this early stage. Does it sound arrogant to say 'Talk to me every week!'? A few inputs from the ladies in this part would be helpful.

NOTE: Below is my opinion.

Ok, here's the deal she thinks you are still playing the field and as such
has been putting in a minimal effort.

Answer me this: Are you still communicating with any of the other girls
from your trip?

If yes, then dump all of them. The purpose of a trip is to find the best girl.
If you didn't find a best girl when visiting then none of them qualify and
you need to clear the board and start over. The only reason to travel all
the way to Ukraine is to find an exceptional girl. All other girls need to
apply elsewhere.

If no, then she needs to know that and you need to take control of the situation.
I would say, "Sally (I named her Sally). I am flying to Blini (I named her city Blini), 
in two weeks for a 3 day weekend and I need you to do all of the following." 
1. Drink lot's of fresh juice and take vitamins every day and get a lot of sleep
because you are going to need your strength.
2. Pick me up at the airport at 1:45 pm
3. Buy four pairs of red thong panties, counting the pair you wear to the airport
I will check.
4. I expect you to be on Skype every single day at 7:45 pm my time.
5. Clear your schedule from this date till that date (dates of the trip).

Either do that or dump her and start over again. Never recycle girls.
If you decide to do see her for a 3 day weekend, then go see her,
seduce her and start winning her heart.

She wants you to seduce her and win her heart, but she isn't willing
to do this while you are playing the field.

Udachi!
Bill

A few inputs from the ladies in this part would be helpful.

The cantankerous bast@rds that hang around the forum have run off
all the women off except for Bo. 
« Last Edit: November 27, 2021, 02:49:50 PM by 2tallbill »
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

Offline Daveman

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #29 on: November 27, 2021, 08:51:40 PM »

I am confused. Am I asking for too much? Am I trying to make it go too fast? Or am I missing something?

You do NOT try to make it go anywhere -- fast or slow. You just have fun-- with her.

You have one job -- to create a fun adventure where intimacy can happen. Hang out, have fun, hook up. That is it. Women control the door to intimacy/sex (which is what, and only what, you are pursuing) - men control the door to the relationship (that's what she will be pursuing as she grows closer to you).  Your job is to make fun dates happen -- and make the physical moves. If she's not extremely religious I'd guess she thought you weren't very interested if you tried *nothing* physical within --- three dates?

You lead the physical -- make the trips, make the dates, and put a move on her for heaven's sake. Go for the kiss, etc.

Do NOT put her on a pedestal, chase her, or really anything you've ever seen in a Western romantic comedy -- that crap just doesn't work and kills her attraction to you.

She'll lead the emotional side and come to you at her own pace.

Read Bill's post again.
The duty of a true patriot is to protect his country from its government. -- Thomas Paine

Offline Chai

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #30 on: December 12, 2021, 05:04:31 AM »
Update!!

So I had another Video call with her. We talked about not seeing each other for a long time. She said she still liked me a lot and said she has realised she Then I invited her over to my place in Germany. I told her how we could explore the area and go to the black forest. She accepted it on Video call and promised me to tell me the dates she was available and would come over.

2 Days Later - BREAKUP!!

She wrote me a message that the communication was sporadic. She was the one busy on weekends too. That she deserves something more and that coming to Germany in Winter in the cold was not what she expexcted. She expected to go to some Warm place , where there is sea and romance etc etc.

I find this reasoning very wierd. There are 2 thoughts that come to my mind.

1) What went really wrong here

2) If I am the sposor of a trip and take the initiative and the relationship is still nowhere to breakup on the above reason. Is this the norm in dating Ukrainian women?

I know that there are always financial purposes involved. But is this normal among well educated women?

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #31 on: December 12, 2021, 06:14:50 AM »
Geez, move on.

Itís never the place you go, but the company youíre with.
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Online Faux Pas

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #32 on: December 12, 2021, 07:01:03 AM »

1) What went really wrong here

But is this normal among well educated women?

Often it is difficult to accept but you were never this woman's choice. She kept you in the back pocket in case others that she is playing fell through. Get over it and move on, there's nothing you could have done to change this result. In fact count your lucky stars that it never moved beyond this stage. You've dodged a bullet.

It has nothing at all to do with educated women. This woman is looking for an easy free ride and will jump to the bigger better deal as soon as she spots it. Forget the pretty pictures and fantasy statements. Get cerebral with your next fancy and find an honest woman interested in you and willing to put in the time to know you

Offline ML

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #33 on: December 12, 2021, 07:56:09 AM »
Hey, who can blame the woman?

Who would want to go to Deutschland in the winter when Rio beckons?
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Online Trenchcoat

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #34 on: December 13, 2021, 05:50:14 AM »
Update!!

So I had another Video call with her. We talked about not seeing each other for a long time. She said she still liked me a lot and said she has realised she Then I invited her over to my place in Germany. I told her how we could explore the area and go to the black forest. She accepted it on Video call and promised me to tell me the dates she was available and would come over.

2 Days Later - BREAKUP!!

She wrote me a message that the communication was sporadic. She was the one busy on weekends too. That she deserves something more and that coming to Germany in Winter in the cold was not what she expexcted. She expected to go to some Warm place , where there is sea and romance etc etc.

I find this reasoning very wierd. There are 2 thoughts that come to my mind.

1) What went really wrong here

2) If I am the sposor of a trip and take the initiative and the relationship is still nowhere to breakup on the above reason. Is this the norm in dating Ukrainian women?

I know that there are always financial purposes involved. But is this normal among well educated women?

I agree with Faux Pas chances are her 'expectations' were raised by another punter. That or when she saw that Germany had been offered it lead her to thinking what else she might be able to get.

Either way it's not a good sign of a good woman and hence time to move on. If she cared for you she wouldn't act like that.

To be honest I would say in my worldly dating experience in Ukraine ;) is to get over there and go meet them there. Take a few weeks off, start messaging them a week before hand to get to know them a bit and fly and go meet. All this rubbish with lengthy messaging and video chats well unless you go into it full on the girl really has little to no emotional connection or attraction to you, she can't have hence why they often slide into duping some guy as they don't really know him as a person.

Holiday dates from the get go or soon after usually isn't a good way to kick things off, I learnt that, if there's one way to screw up a relationship early that seems to be one of the ways to do it.
It's a Free Britain we have. We're never going back! :)

Offline civi68

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #35 on: December 13, 2021, 09:27:15 AM »
Time to move on and feel relieved that you dodged the bullet. You could have found out later and wasted time and money. If she was sincerely interested, she would have been happy to come no matter what. You did nothing wrong. When it comes to women and people in general, go by what they do and not what they say. Only wanting to travel with you to a warm place is a RED FLAG. Best bet is never take the woman on vacations to other countries. Make that something to do when you are married.
   Many of us experienced similar issues with FSU women. Things going great, she says great things to us, affectionate, and then over time we are hit with things that tells us the woman is not so interested in us or worse, has ulterior motives. Move on and feel lucky that you can get back out there.

Offline GQBlues

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #36 on: December 13, 2021, 09:29:07 AM »
Hey, who can blame the woman?

Who would want to go to Deutschland in the winter when Rio beckons?

Well, fret not, just as the very many weak-kneed men that went through this process, the fact that the OP literally ignored cautionary advise/opinions about the gal, he still went ahead and actually tried to make plans with the woman; chances are better than good he'll still chase an imaginary love connection with a woman about to take him for a ride.

Happens with far greater frequency with men than not. Why that is, who knows? Desperation? who knows. I don't even know why men bother to post asking for advise/opinions but then not only ignore those, but his own instincts telling him to split to begin with. It's the darndest thing you can see in these fora.
Quote from: msmob
1. Because of 'man', global warming is causing desert and arid areas to suffer long, dry spell.
2. The 2018 Camp Fire and Woolsey California wildfires are forests burning because of global warming.
3. N95 mask will choke you dead after 30 min. of use.

Offline fathertime

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #37 on: December 13, 2021, 10:45:36 AM »
Well, fret not, just as the very many weak-kneed men that went through this process, the fact that the OP literally ignored cautionary advise/opinions about the gal, he still went ahead and actually tried to make plans with the woman; chances are better than good he'll still chase an imaginary love connection with a woman about to take him for a ride.

Happens with far greater frequency with men than not. Why that is, who knows? Desperation? who knows. I don't even know why men bother to post asking for advise/opinions but then not only ignore those, but his own instincts telling him to split to begin with. It's the darndest thing you can see in these fora.

I was browsing my facebook this weekend.  There is this guy I knew about 25 years ago.  He is mentally not playing with a full deck/special ed, but somewhat functional.   I see he has a new 'girlfriend'.  Looks like a beautiful Filipina girl maybe 20-25 years old.  He is putting up pictures of split screen chats.  He has zero chance with her, or just about any woman in fact.  I'd say it is likely she is vacuuming all his hard-earned dollars.  These sorts of people exist, it is a bit sad, there is nothing much that can be done for them. 

NOT saying anything about the OP on this thread.  Just relating a story relating to this post I quoted.

Fathertime!   
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline Boethius

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #38 on: December 13, 2021, 12:00:05 PM »
I doubt rather highly the woman's "expectations were raised" as per Trenchcoat.  A piece of advice - any ruminations by Trench about women should be ignored.


I suspect this woman was never serious about you, and her comment is just a way to break contact easily. 
In a world of Putins, be a Zelensky.

Offline 2tallbill

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Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #39 on: December 15, 2021, 05:33:29 PM »

NOT saying anything about the OP on this thread.  Just relating a story relating to this post I quoted.

Fathertime!

Here is a situation that I've seen at least a hundred times. A smitten starry eyed,
and completely oblivious guy traveling with a way, way too hot, totally eye-rollingly-
bored Ukrainian girl that is going to end the second his wallet runs dry.

I can spot them half way across the airport and he is right next to her thoroughly,
unknowing of the fate that awaits just ahead.

FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

Offline 2tallbill

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Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #40 on: December 15, 2021, 05:51:28 PM »

2) If I am the sponsor of a trip and take the initiative and the relationship is still nowhere to breakup on the above reason. Is this the norm in dating Ukrainian women?

I know that there are always financial purposes involved. But is this normal among well educated women?

My wife Angel Eyes came to visit me in Western North Dakota USA, which is one of
the harshest climates in the USA with the exception of Alaska far from the coast and
it has no interesting features, except maybe oil derricks. There is a near constant
20+ mph (32kph) wind blowing dust all over everything. There are no trees, no hills,
no canyons, no beaches or anything notable in the state.

A good girl will put a wire hanger between her toes and hang her leg out of the
window in a rainstorm to get better reception during a Skype call with a man that
she is interested in. You found a girl who was so-so interested (or less) and you
want and need a girl who is "hang her leg out the window interested."

Moving away from her family, language, culture, food and friends is a tough,
tough thing to do. You need a girl who is "can do and will do."

Forget this girl and move on, she didn't have what it takes to make it anyway.


This needs to be added to the RW commandments
Good girls make things happen, bad/mediocre girls make excuses.

« Last Edit: December 15, 2021, 05:55:59 PM by 2tallbill »
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

Offline ML

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Re: Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #41 on: December 15, 2021, 06:07:41 PM »
Here is a situation that I've seen at least a hundred times.

A smitten starry eyed, and completely oblivious guy traveling with a way, way too hot, totally eye-rollingly-bored Ukrainian girl that is going to end the second his wallet runs dry.

I can spot them half way across the airport and he is right next to her thoroughly, unknowing of the fate that awaits just ahead.

I don't remember seeing you at the airport.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline 2tallbill

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Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #42 on: December 15, 2021, 06:10:56 PM »
All this rubbish with lengthy messaging and video chats well unless you go into
it full on the girl really has little to no emotional connection or attraction to you,
she can't have hence why they often slide into duping some guy as they don't
really know him as a person.

Trench,

This guy has met this woman face to face. She is not interested enough in him
for him to continue pursuing her. A woman must be VERY interested in you or
the relationship will never work, this is true in a local relationship or but especially
in an international relationship.

I don't want to speculate on the woman's intentions or goals, but I will comment on
the information that the OP told us here.

Udachi!

Bill
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

Offline 2tallbill

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Courting a Ukrainian Woman
« Reply #43 on: December 15, 2021, 06:12:58 PM »
I don't remember seeing you at the airport.

You would have seen me, my head sticks out in a crowd.
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Kiss the girl, don't ask her first.

 

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