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Author Topic: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?  (Read 53152 times)

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Offline BillyB

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #50 on: August 12, 2012, 07:40:57 AM »
 
Joe, make the move and she'll stop you when she's at her limit. Don't worry she's going to think you're a rapist. You need to worry if she thinks you're a sexual dud who can't get it up.
 
Your goal is marriage or just taking exotic trips with beautiful women? How many years you spent with this woman without talking about sex or other important issues? Time is wasting and important issues aren't addressed.
 
Assuming the lady is a virgin or have sex only with her husband, you NEED to ask her her views on sex within marriage. If she is a virgin, she will probably tell you that she doesn't know if she'll enjoy it or not. Risky! You two may not be compatible and most likely one of you will be disappointed if one of you require sex more than the other. What she needs to tell you is that regardless if she gets pleasure from sex, she gets pleasure for making her husband happy. Anything less that that, beware.
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Offline JoeS421

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #51 on: August 12, 2012, 08:09:57 AM »
OP, as well as other inexperienced younger guys,
Eduard is giving you invaluable information. I couldn't say it better than him. Do listen to Eduard.
But most important thing is that he explained the concept-- like "pre-feminizm man would".
Russia isn't a feministic country, and it demonstrates itself in miriads of things. Behavior in different situations-- in the restaurant, among friends, colleagues, etc. This doesn't mean to say they are shy and obedient like asians are. Still, MAN IS EXPECTED TO BE PRO-ACTIVE IN SEX, RELATIONSHIPS, ACTIONS.

Hi Ludmila,

Thanks for the reply, it is always nice to hear things from the female perspective! 

I have stated earlier that people here seem to think that I have a chance, but I need to make the first move.  Maybe I am used to American women, but usually that I make the move after receiving some signals to go ahead (example: one previous g/f showed me pictures of her in a bra anad jeans in her photo album on our second date when I went to her place for the first time.  Another previous g/f who was a friend of mine before we dated - I knew she was interested when she started spending time with me exclusively and started crashing at my place without asking or my inviting her).  However, with previous relationships, we usually sleep in the same bed a few times before getting intimate.  Maybe this is related to the rule of three, which IO mentioned and you refer to below.

Moreover, somebody up the thread said you should kind of repeat your approaches 3 times ( to make sure she agrees, because she may want to play a little bit implying " I am not that easy to be taken. You have to really show you are into me").

Wow, well said.  Maybe your sentence above sums up exactly what's going on...  Anyway, this upcoming trip will be the third time I will be seeing her since the first time we stayed in the same room together.

A decent RW, unlike an AW, is rarely pro-active, leadng in sex and relationships.

Which results in me, an AM, thinks she is coming across as prudish, leading me to be cautious and delay making a move in order to avoid upsetting her.  Maybe this whole thing is a cultural misunderstanding.  :rolleyes:

That said, a number of other reasons that the posters mentioned before are important to bear in mind have to be cleared up  :
scamer; free trips while she thinks you're a stand-by ( she may have another guy) ; STD;  may be she wants to show you she's a prude and doesn't easily have intimacy before marriage.

All points that have to be taken into account:
Scammer: she never asks me for money nor ever asks me to buy her anything.  If she is a scammer in the traditional sense, this is one heck of a long con.

Stand-by: If there's another guy in the picture, what are some warning flags I should be watching out for?  Cancelling dates at the last minute or being unavailable for long stretches of time frequently?  She has let me handle her smartphone before, and I could have snooped through her messages but I didn't.  Likewise, she has handled my smartphone too.

STD: only way to find out is to have a talk about it

Prudeness: Again, this is the feeling that I get - she prays every evening before bed and prays on her knees every time we visit a cathedral, she does not find jokes about off-color topics funny.  She told me that she really dislikes the stereotype that Ukrainian women are all prostitutes, and told me that she is a normal person.  She also has said that she does not understand people who have no moral standards.

It is impossible to explain everything here. You will learn it yourself. And read all that Eduard advises once again. He is writing about what PRECISELY is expected.
Best to you.

Thanks Ludmila.  Also one more thing I should mention is that she asks if I like certain men's clothes she points out, and she wanted to know if she could have some input with my clothes choices.  In my experience, the serious relationships I have had involved my g/f wanting to have significant input on my wardrobe.   8)

Offline Eduard

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #52 on: August 12, 2012, 08:19:08 AM »
Also one more thing I should mention is that she asks if I like certain men's clothes she points out, and she wanted to know if she could have some input with my clothes choices.  In my experience, the serious relationships I have had involved my g/f wanting to have significant input on my wardrobe.   8)
This is a very good sign.
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Offline ML

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #53 on: August 12, 2012, 12:14:58 PM »
I have stated earlier that people here seem to think that I have a chance, but I need to make the first move.  Maybe I am used to American women, but usually that I make the move after receiving some signals to go ahead (example: one previous g/f showed me pictures of her in a bra anad jeans in her photo album on our second date when I went to her place for the first time.  Another previous g/f who was a friend of mine before we dated - I knew she was interested when she started spending time with me exclusively and started crashing at my place without asking or my inviting her).  However, with previous relationships, we usually sleep in the same bed a few times before getting intimate.  Maybe this is related to the rule of three, which IO mentioned and you refer to below.

Yes, always good to the signals from the gal, but your view of signals is a bit different than mine.

A gal in bed with me is always a signal that there is going to be sex!!

Only exception would be that it was a first date, we had previously discussed that there was only one bed, and there was the agreement that there would be no sex.

Aside from that, sharing a bed means sex.  The real signals come earlier when she announces she is going to go take a shower.

Sometimes it is good  to have a little bit of fun with a gal and pretend you don't understand her signal . . . but not forever !!   8)

i.e.  You are on sofa making out and she pulls her shirt up out of her jeans or skirt.  You do nothing.    She unbuttons top of her blouse.  You do nothing. 
She unbuttons top of her jeans.  You  do nothing.
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Offline DKMM

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #54 on: August 19, 2012, 12:16:14 AM »
Joe,
1st of all, don't listen to your well meaning but clueless US buddies.  They have NO idea what they are talking about. 
I'm pretty sure I know what's going on but first please answer some questions.
Have you discussed marriage?  If so, who brought this up?  How did that conversation go?  Are you in love or feel like its going to be love if you feel intimate?

Offline DKMM

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #55 on: August 19, 2012, 02:45:05 PM »
Joe PM'd me so I will not discuss what he said privately but I think my reply should be public as there is nothing inappropriate about what I'm about to say. 
I'm sticking with my initial assumption, she is just inexperienced, unsure and conservative (shy is another word).  I've dealt with this type of lady and I did not understand it at first either.  its up to you how to handle it, but handle with care it it will blow up in your face.  It does not hurt to push things a bit, she is waiting for your lead but more than anything she is waiting to know if she has a real future with you.  If you want this to work, more time will be needed with her and find a way to show her you are serious in your intentions. 
 
While the American friends tell you she's a scammer (they ALL say this and they are 100% wrong in your case), her Russian friends are all telling her you are just going to use her for fun and move on.  She has nowhere near the confidence and "nothing to lose" attitude you are used to with American women.  Your fear is getting scammed.  Her fear is getting used and dumped with a face losing "I told you so" from her negative friends. 
 
I cannot emphasize how important it is to know this.

Offline Eduard

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #56 on: August 19, 2012, 04:03:17 PM »
Joe PM'd me so I will not discuss what he said privately but I think my reply should be public as there is nothing inappropriate about what I'm about to say. 
I'm sticking with my initial assumption, she is just inexperienced, unsure and conservative (shy is another word).  I've dealt with this type of lady and I did not understand it at first either.  its up to you how to handle it, but handle with care it it will blow up in your face.  It does not hurt to push things a bit, she is waiting for your lead but more than anything she is waiting to know if she has a real future with you.  If you want this to work, more time will be needed with her and find a way to show her you are serious in your intentions. 
 
While the American friends tell you she's a scammer (they ALL say this and they are 100% wrong in your case), her Russian friends are all telling her you are just going to use her for fun and move on.  She has nowhere near the confidence and "nothing to lose" attitude you are used to with American women.  Your fear is getting scammed.  Her fear is getting used and dumped with a face losing "I told you so" from her negative friends. 
 
I cannot emphasize how important it is to know this.
some good points, except I personally don't know any really conservative women who would sleep on top of a man in a nightie... Things may still work out for them IMO if Joe makes the right moves on his next visit.
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Online Faux Pas

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #57 on: August 20, 2012, 08:25:06 AM »
I stated it earlier and appears it's worth repeating:

Joe, this woman isn't scamming you. From your descriptions the reason(s) you haven't had sex with this lady isn't her, it's you. The next time you find yourself in the company of this woman, specifically in bed, put it all out there and make the move. If she didn't feel good about you and trust you, she would never have been in a bed with you in the first place.

It would appear you are waiting on the trumpets to sound and the angels to sing before you move to close the deal. She can't draw you any clearer picture than she already has. You are way past the mysterious RW stage. Now it is only boy meets girl. Exactly the same as with any other woman you've slept with.

Your American buddies don't know shit. That I'll agree with. You don't appear to be very experienced yourself. That's not a slam or an insult just an observation. There is nothing wrong with this woman. She's done everything she can to give you the green light. You just have to recognize it and go. She's into you

Offline JoeS421

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #58 on: August 26, 2012, 08:54:58 PM »
Hi everyone, here is a summary of how this trip went:

My flight was delayed by four hours, so by the time I got in (connection through Frankfurt messed up) we had cancelled plans to meet on Friday night since I got in at midnight and met up the following day.  When we met, we kissed, although she kissed me on the side of the lips.  We had a good day, first of all, she booked and paid for a two hour session just for me at the local spa, since it was my birthday recently.  I thanked her and we kissed on the lips, and she said "you have lipstick all over you" and wiped it off my face, which explains why she didn't kiss me on the lips full on when we met.  So I had the massage session, then afterwards we went a historical park west of Kiev.  We had a good time, had a good chat (one of the things we talked about as she is worried about her mother's retirement since her mom is 49 and there is a lot of ageism in the Ukranian workplace and the pensions aren't much - so her and her mom are having a debate about looking after her mom's future.  Her father had a stroke and is in hospital in Russia, although he is doing better.  So she said there are a lot of headaches for her at the moment)  She hasn't asked me for a penny or anything, we were just talking and she was asking me for advice or what do people do for investments in the western countries.  Also we bought tickets to a old style cooking show at the park, but we couldn't attend because they had a full house but they were still selling tickets.  She argued with the ticket seller, who initially refused a refund but eventually caved in.  So walked around the park, holding hands a lot both on her initative and mine.  While waiting for the taxi back, I embraced her, and she put her head on my shoulder for a while until we realised we couldn't see the arriving taxi like this   ;)

We then had dinner at a restaurant where I took her to dinner where we first met, and talked some more about various things, and we both recalled good times about the trips we have taken together.  Like usual, we looked into each other's eyes a lot and I moved in close to her (we were sitting side by side) and started touching her a bit and she touched me a few times although it seemed I was the one who was showing most of the affection.  We had a good dinner, and good conversation.

Before I invited her to my hotel, earlier last week she mentioned that her mother is out of town and she has to look after the dog herself?  Before I said anything about coming over, she did mention that she had to make sure the dog is all right, and asking me what time should we meet tomorrow.  I asked her isn't your girlfriend from work at home helping you with the dog, but she said her friend was not over during the weekend and over the weekend it is just her at home.  I just continued the conversation and she mentioned that she did want to get home before sunset because there have been several crimes in her neighbourhood recently.  I offered to walk her back to her place to make sure she is all right, but she thanked me and declined saying that just as long as she gets back in daytime, she's all right. 

Since it was only 7:30, I asked if we were going anywhere else after dinner, and she said she would like to but she had to get back, since the dog has been in the house all day and with her mom on vacation, someone has to look after him.  I then mentioned that she is invited to stop by the hotel since I had a gift for her (which I do) and she asked could she come by tomorrow (Sunday).  She said normally she would invite me to her place and her and her mom would cook for me, but with the dog all alone she has to get back.  I got the restaurant bill, and I guess I've accepted the fact that she's not staying over, so I didn't push it any more and walked her to the metro stop.  During this time, I tried showing a bit of affection, like embracing her as we were on the metro escalators, but noticed that she didn't embrace me fully in return, and didn't kiss me straight on the lips (maybe she reapplied her lipstick when I was in the bathroom?).  We waited on the platform together, since my train was southbound and hers was northbound.  I tried being more affectionate (hence all the posts on my thread about how FSU women expect the man to show initiative), when she said "I'm not used to showing affection in public, and someone I work with could see us".  I asked her, "What's wrong with that, I have told my friends and colleagues about you" and she said "if they find out I am dating a foreign man, they could terminate my employment" (her words) since they had an experience with a woman who married an Australian and left the firm very soon after.  She also said that if they found out she was dating me, they would talk bad things about her behind her back (you know how the stereotypes are, same reason I have only told a few select friends on how she is from Ukraine - I have stereotypes to deal with at home too).  She said "I understand that it is more diverse where you come from, but this is Ukraine."  Finally I understood her aversion to public displays of affection in Kiev
(she is more affectionate when we are in another city), and just talked with her about our plans for tomorrow and I acted more discreet...   When her train came, she embraced me, kissed me on the lips, and said Bye.  I then walked her to her train, even though mine had pulled in on the opposite platform.  She said "you're going to miss your train" and I was like "I'll get the next one, I just want to say bye again"  We kissed on the cheek, and said bye and I ran to get my train.

I wanted to let you know how the last day of the trip went.  We took a day trip to Chernihiv, and saw the sights there.  I'll just get to the important parts, we were walking in the park where they had churches and she was visiting them and praying inside each one.  We were walking and holding hands, and I brought up the subject of religion.  I asked her about her comment last time I saw her about wanting a Catholic wedding, since she grew up Russian Orthodox.  She said she believes in God, and that worshipping Him through the Catholic or Orthodox churches is the same.  However, Catholicism does not recgonize divorce, so it makes people not rush into a wedding, and it makes sure people who get married know each other well.  We then went into a conversation about the couples we both know (my friends and her friends), and both about people who rushed into marriage and those who took their time or lived together before marriage.  I asked her if she is okay with living with someone before marriage, or would she prefer to be married before living with someone.  She said that living together before marriage is for a "different type of woman" (her words) than her.  She said it is like being a housewife without any rights, it is all right for the guy though, but for the girl it is different.  This gave me some insight into her line of thinking, so I thought that asking her about us and our future is definitely going to be on the cards tonight.

So we get back to Kiev, have a nice dinner and dessert, she is in a good mood and looking/flirting with me.  After dinner, she was going to say goodbye but I told her I have the gift pack for her so she called a taxi that would take us by the hotel and then to her place.  While we were waiting for the taxi, I told her that I had a great weekend and that I wanted to have a talk about us and our future.  I told her that she is pretty, smart, fun to be with, et cetera and I can see myself spending my life with her.  She smiled, laughed but got a little bit nervous.  I asked her, "However, there are times when you hold back on affection and intimacy, and I need to know what you feel about me."  She just said "I'll have to think about it, I was not expecting to have this conversation".  I then replied with "How do you feel about me?  Just tell me and be honest, as I have been honest with you."  She said, "I like you, but I have to think about the future", but then the taxi came and she said we can talk at the hotel.  We rode the taxi back, she was still smiling at me, so it seemed there was no change in her mood.  We get to the hotel and my room, and I show her the gift pack.  She hugs me, kisses me on the lips several times and says thanks.  I then resume the conversation we had earlier, I offer her a seat, she sits on the bed and I sit next to her.  I explained to her that "I'm not asking you to marry me right now"  She breathed a sigh of relief and she smiled and said, "Ok, because I was scared" and she thought she was on the spot right then and there.  I said that "I understand you want to get to know someone really well before marrying them.  I feel the same way, so I am not asking for marriage right now."  I explained to her since it was last June when we first met, and I thought that after seeing each other for a year, I wanted to take our relationship to the next level, possibly on the way to becoming life partners.  I wanted to become serious girlfriend and boyfriend, but I didn't think of those exact words in the moment.  (Do you think I should mention that in my next email, to explain what I meant?)  She then said, "I like you, I just need to think - can I write you?"  I said sure, I thought that she needs time to collect her thoughts and make sure she uses the correct English words.  We kissed on the lips again, then I walked her to the waiting taxi, and paid the fare then I thanked her for the weekend and said our good byes with a cheek kiss.  She said good bye and also promised to write me.

Obviously I have to await her email before I can finish commenting, but a few things I want to say would be "I need to make sure you are serious about me before I spend any more major outlays on you."  Thanks to everyone for your input!

Offline Eduard

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #59 on: August 27, 2012, 07:10:25 AM »
Joe, I think this is more of a "friends" thing for her and she doesn't have any romantic feelings for you. This trip proved it beyond doubt IMO.
If I were you I'd start looking for a woman who will be into you romantically. You've given this relationship more than enough time IMO and acted as a perfect gentleman. Keep her as a friend and start looking for another woman.


Once she feels that you are slipping away she may still come around and suddenly will become interested in you romantically. In the words of a famous Russian poet A. Pushkin: "Чем меньше женщину мы любим тем больше нравимся мы ей" which translates: "The less we love a woman the more she is attracted to us".


Many women are like that, especially if they are attractive and are used to getting plenty of male attention. Once she feels that she's got competition and you have less of a romantic interest in her she may become more aggressive and try to win you back. Whether or not this happens, you should still persue other women and I'm sure that you can find the right one for you. You will be much happier finding a woman with whom you will have MUTUAL attraction and romantic feelings.  Who will shake with excitement and cry the tears of happiness when you tell her that you would like to spend the rest of your life with her and propose marriage.
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Offline TheTraveler

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #60 on: August 27, 2012, 07:29:08 AM »
I explained to her that "I'm not asking you to marry me right now"  She breathed a sigh of relief and she smiled and said, "Ok, because I was scared" and she thought she was on the spot right then and there.

never a good sign when she's relieved to learn that you're not going to propose.
 

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #61 on: August 27, 2012, 07:41:49 AM »
Joe are you sure this is the same woman that slept on top of you?

True, in her hometown she would be more inclined to stay away from your hotel room. I took your earlier descriptions as she was a bit conservative, maybe religious. You seemed to be the wet blanket of the two and scared to make a move.

You might now be a product of your earlier "inaction". Quite likely, she laid it out there on the other trips and her firecracker never went "ka-boom". You didn't make it happen. Either she didn't want you too and has you right where she wants you, she did want you too and you didn't now the powder is wet. It might be too late to turn this around. You last chance would be a sincere heart to heart and a ravishing of each others bodies.

OTOH, everything thing in your latest recap from this lady is all brick wall. Quite cold actually. She sounds like a wonderful hostess but, nothing even remotely interested romantically. It may be because of your history, it may be that she never was. Public displays, yeah okay, give her that one but, her zest to get to the dog? C'mon, you've traveled 5K miles. You've slept together and (for your side) pent up sexual frustration. She's rushing home (home alone) to see about the dog? She might as well just text earlier in the evening that she had to stay home and wash her hair. You should do some serious thinking about salvaging your trip IMHO

Offline Hammer2722

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #62 on: August 27, 2012, 07:45:35 AM »
I agree with Ed here. I really don't think she is into you romantically. She likes you and that is about it. I say keep writing her but start looking for someone else. I truely believe in the saying: " You will surely know when a FSU woman is attracted to you" and it doesn't take 2 years of dating and letter writing.
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Offline Belvis

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #63 on: August 27, 2012, 09:05:56 AM »

never a good sign when she's relieved to learn that you're not going to propose.
Yes, not a good sign. One-way street. I think I experienced to date for a long time a similar woman. Finally we get down in a bed but immediately after we split. This woman realizes you're a good man and no replacement at her hands so she can not move on without a solid reason. She is trying to be into you with her mind so far as she is not with her heart.  It's a pity to move on the young attractive lady, however we all have a limited life span to spend it for somebody who may be never love you.

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #64 on: August 27, 2012, 09:52:37 AM »
Keep her as a friend and start looking for another woman.



Sound advice.

Offline GoodOlBoy

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #65 on: August 27, 2012, 09:54:17 AM »
..... mother is out of town and she has to look after the dog herself?.......  make sure the dog is all right, ........ helping you with the dog....... she had to get back, since the dog has been in the house all day,....... but with the dog all alone

Dude, what's up with the "dog"?
He's getting more action than you. :rolleyes:
I call BS on this chick!
 
I don't mean to be harsh with you Joe, but this girl is jerking your chain.
The "dog" is probably some guy named Sergei or (substitute whatever).
 
You seem like a really nice guy.
 
Some guy's just aren't cut out for this deal, sorry Joe but you may be one of them.
 
GOB

PS.... If there really was a dog (and there wasn't), a normal date with an FSUW wouldn't end at 7:30pm (unless she's a minor?)

Since it was only 7:30, I asked if we were going anywhere else after dinner, and she said she would like to but she had to get back, since the dog........
« Last Edit: August 27, 2012, 10:08:21 AM by GoodOlBoy »
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Offline ML

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #66 on: August 27, 2012, 10:31:34 AM »
Thank heavens you are there on a WMVM trip Joe.

This would be  a disaster if you were on a WOVO.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline JoeS421

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #67 on: August 27, 2012, 10:49:42 AM »
Thanks for the advice guys!  Yes, I can tell she is only interested in being friends at the moment.  Which is fine, but no more trips on my dime, and her birthday is in a few weeks - Instead of sending flowers like I did last year, she is just getting a text message from me, and that's it.  I'm moving on, but wanted to share my experiences for the newbies.

Offline Eduard

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #68 on: August 27, 2012, 10:55:37 AM »
Instead of sending flowers like I did last year, she is just getting a text message from me, and that's it.  I'm moving on
Good plan, Joe!
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Offline GoodOlBoy

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #69 on: August 27, 2012, 11:16:28 AM »
her birthday is in a few weeks - Instead of sending flowers like I did last year, she is just getting a text message from me, and that's it.

Sounds like a good plan Joe.
You may also want to send her a Russian e-card (free :D ):
 
http://cards.mail.ru/search/ListPiP.html?gid_list=gid1%2Cgid2%2Cgid3&gid1=24&gid2=39&gid3=80
 
GOB
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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #70 on: August 27, 2012, 01:32:56 PM »
her birthday is in a few weeks - Instead of sending flowers like I did last year, she is just getting a text message from me, and that's it.

if burning your bridge is the plan... that should do it.

Offline JoeS421

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #71 on: August 27, 2012, 01:35:53 PM »
Many women are like that, especially if they are attractive and are used to getting plenty of male attention. Once she feels that she's got competition and you have less of a romantic interest in her she may become more aggressive and try to win you back. Whether or not this happens, you should still persue other women and I'm sure that you can find the right one for you. You will be much happier finding a woman with whom you will have MUTUAL attraction and romantic feelings.  Who will shake with excitement and cry the tears of happiness when you tell her that you would like to spend the rest of your life with her and propose marriage.

Exactly right!  Even if she does come crawling back, she needs to really prove herself before I will consider it.  Like other people have pointed out, Ms. Right will not get scared nor freaked out when she thinks I am proposing or even talking about marriage.

Offline JoeS421

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #72 on: August 27, 2012, 01:37:41 PM »

if burning your bridge is the plan... that should do it.

Interesting comment - Guys, what do you think?  A text message is too impersonal?

I want to still be friends, but more importantly - show her that just because she does not have romantic feelings for me does not mean the end of the world for me.  I will still talk with her and I can deal with this - I am a bigger person.

Offline JoeS421

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #73 on: August 27, 2012, 01:39:45 PM »

Dude, what's up with the "dog"?
He's getting more action than you. :rolleyes:
I call BS on this chick!
 
I don't mean to be harsh with you Joe, but this girl is jerking your chain.
The "dog" is probably some guy named Sergei or (substitute whatever).
 
You seem like a really nice guy.
 
Some guy's just aren't cut out for this deal, sorry Joe but you may be one of them.
 
GOB

PS.... If there really was a dog (and there wasn't), a normal date with an FSUW wouldn't end at 7:30pm (unless she's a minor?)

Hi GOB,

There really is a dog, I have seen pictures of him and her friends have mentioned it too.  However, you guys are right, I was a little miffed that she went home so early, especially since I came so far and endured two three hour plus flight delays (Travel tip for everyone here: AeroSvit sucks) to see her...

Offline JoeS421

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Re: Russian/Ukranian women - views on sex before marriage?
« Reply #74 on: August 27, 2012, 01:42:07 PM »
Joe are you sure this is the same woman that slept on top of you?

True, in her hometown she would be more inclined to stay away from your hotel room. I took your earlier descriptions as she was a bit conservative, maybe religious. You seemed to be the wet blanket of the two and scared to make a move.

You might now be a product of your earlier "inaction". Quite likely, she laid it out there on the other trips and her firecracker never went "ka-boom". You didn't make it happen. Either she didn't want you too and has you right where she wants you, she did want you too and you didn't now the powder is wet. It might be too late to turn this around. You last chance would be a sincere heart to heart and a ravishing of each others bodies.

OTOH, everything thing in your latest recap from this lady is all brick wall. Quite cold actually. She sounds like a wonderful hostess but, nothing even remotely interested romantically. It may be because of your history, it may be that she never was. Public displays, yeah okay, give her that one but, her zest to get to the dog? C'mon, you've traveled 5K miles. You've slept together and (for your side) pent up sexual frustration. She's rushing home (home alone) to see about the dog? She might as well just text earlier in the evening that she had to stay home and wash her hair. You should do some serious thinking about salvaging your trip IMHO

Or she slept on top of me to keep up a romantic impression?  Anyway, I'm home now as I had the conversation I wanted to have...

 

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