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Author Topic: Age difference and length married poll  (Read 16195 times)

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Offline Bruce

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Age difference and length married poll
« on: February 14, 2005, 04:26:12 PM »
This is so board members can get a feel for the spectrum of guys currently married to FSU women and their current length of marriage.  The more married guys answer, the more interesting and valuable the results will become.  Garbage in, garbage out - so please only married guys to FSU women and answer honestly.  I know it is fairly busy, but polls are hard to make - so please do not chastise me too hard..................
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline Bruno

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« Reply #1 on: February 14, 2005, 08:37:04 PM »
Hello Bruce,

I am not anymore married but i have vote :P... i was married 5 year with a russian woman around 10 year more young ( 19-29 )...

These 5 year is the time we have stay together... 4 year to be eligible to receive the Belgium nationality, 1 year for receive it.... i have not count the year needed for divorce :(...

For the next one, i have choice someone +- 5 year around my age... in some year, i can say if it is better :D choice

Offline Bruce

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Age difference and length married poll
« Reply #2 on: February 15, 2005, 06:01:47 AM »
Bruno, you have had a tremendous amount of experience with Russian women.  Everyone on this board apreciates your comments, insights etc.  I posted the poll in part to let the members know the realities of age differences, so they get real information as opposed to what the perceived age difference "should be," so they know how long or short members are married.   Right now the majority of married posters are married less than five years.  It was tought to design the poll and I could not fit in all the categories I originally wanted.  I am probably the most recently married - 3 months for all it is worth, which is alot less than 1, 2, 3, 4 or 5 years!  It's great you were already married to a Russian woman for five years and probably will remarry a RW in the near future - congratulations! 
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline Bruno

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Age difference and length married poll
« Reply #3 on: February 15, 2005, 06:40:55 AM »
In some way, AM guys have more chance that me ...

After two year, they already know if they have married a "Visa Whores" of not... after two year, a RW married to a AM can receive her green card... For us, in Belgium, the delay is 4 year and the procedure is long ( around 1 year )...

Maybe ask the lenght married after the green card ( of citizenship ) is a better side of view... in these case, scamming don't exist anymore... it is more about love...

These limit of five year is good for US citizen... but not for european...

In any case, i hope you go receive a lot of "answer"... maybe you go allow some "myth" to dissappear... i am curious to read your final report from these polls...

Offline Albert

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« Reply #4 on: February 15, 2005, 06:45:25 AM »
Bruno says: i was married 5 year with a russian woman .

Bruce replies:  Bruno, you have had a tremendous amount of experience with Russian women.

Anything misstated here?

Offline Bruce

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« Reply #5 on: February 15, 2005, 07:28:51 AM »
Albert - I was just acknowledging his experience, albeit ultimately one that ended in divorce.  Negative experience often is the best teacher!
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline Bruno

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« Reply #6 on: February 15, 2005, 08:03:06 AM »
I don't see my previous marriage like a negative experience... of course, my ex have explain me that she have never love me, that i was a good guy but she have feel nothing for me...

But our divorce was not a fight and we have speak a lot about our living together... and i have learn of my own mistake... i was not ready for my first marriage... and i hope to be better for the second...

RW are not special but Russian culture is special... several man think that RW marry WM because they don't like Russia... wrong... try to say something bad about russia to your RW...

And Albert, about experience,  read my post about "Do's and Do Not's in the FSU" ... you have meet several RW but i have live with one during 5 year... meeting is one step, the next one is marriage, the last one is live together and try to stay together, this last step ask a lot of work from each, certainly more that the two first... 

Woman are like man, we are not the same before of after marriage... the woman you meet is not these that you go know after marriage... everybody try to hide imperfection before the marriage but these comeback after...

Offline Albert

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« Reply #7 on: February 15, 2005, 08:14:44 AM »
Bruce, I was just nitpicking a bit.  :-))  Bruno was married to one Russian WOMAN.  In your post you said he had a lot of experience with Russian WOMEN.

Bruno, I agree with you completely.  Sorry, I was not trying to downplay at all your experience in living with one woman for 5 years or more.  I know there is a big difference between the 20-70 days that I have spent with about 11 FSU women (out of the 150 that I had first dates with) and being with one for 5 years.  I, myself, was married for over 20 years to an AW.

But, on the other hand, I think there is also a big difference in the experience that a guy has from being married, even 50 years to a RW and that other guys have from dating hundreds of these women.  The one woman that a guys marries could be quite atypical from the RW norm.  So it is somewhat of a toss up as to who has the most 'valuable' knowledge.  :-))  I am not claiming to be the highest expert by any stretch of the imagination.  Wilt Chamberlain had sex with over 10,000 women.  I don't know that I have even had eye contact with that many women!!

Offline anzo

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Age difference and length married poll
« Reply #8 on: February 16, 2005, 09:29:14 AM »
I voted though I'm divorced (14 year difference and married 7 years). I earned it! Gorgeous sexy awful rotten woman. The age difference was totally irrelevent to us. Heck, she's always going to be more mature than I am. I was also engaged to another lady (twice! long story...) with a 24 year difference (I'm 48).

Anzo

Offline jb

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Age difference and length married poll
« Reply #9 on: February 16, 2005, 02:37:21 PM »
anzo,

I shed real tears when I read your account about the little girl.  It's a pity the mother couldn't have been a bit more reasonable.  I have a good relationship with my step-sons, but a little girl would steal my heart in an instant.

Good luck to you.

Doug Salem

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Age difference and length married poll
« Reply #10 on: February 17, 2005, 07:37:43 PM »
O.K., I just clocked in on number 8. Geez, am I the only one in my category?

- Doug

Offline Bruce

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Age difference and length married poll
« Reply #11 on: February 18, 2005, 04:56:39 AM »
What is very interesting even though the numbers are extremely low at this point is that 2 people are married greater than 5 years who have a 20 to 25 year age difference.
"A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  Emily Dickinson

Offline KenC

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« Reply #12 on: February 18, 2005, 05:13:55 AM »
Bruce,

As one of those, I did notice it too.  40% (2 of 5) of the guys married for at least 5 years have an age difference of over 20 years.  Over 21% of the guys have that same age difference, while the most popular age group is 11-15 with 43%.  Interesting poll.

KenC
« Last Edit: February 18, 2005, 05:16:00 AM by KenC »
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Offline Turboguy

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« Reply #13 on: February 18, 2005, 03:09:46 PM »
Quote from: Bruno

RW are not special but Russian culture is special... several man think that RW marry WM because they don't like Russia... wrong... try to say something bad about russia to your RW...


 

I have to go along with what Bruno says here.   On my first trip to visit my gal both she and the interpreter asked independently if I thought  Russia was the best country in the world.   I definatley had the feeling that if I told them what I really thought the relationship would have been over.

I guess you have to look at the fact that even back in the communist days when the whole family lived in a two room apartment and shared a bath and kitchen with another apartment or two and they waited in line for a pair of ill fitting shoes that fell apart in weeks that they were brainwashed constantly about how great thier country was.  

No, I don' t think it is the best, nor do I think it is the worst.   I just said that I had never thought about it but the people who I knew who had moved from Russia to the USA were happy and did not want to go back.  I think they all have a lot of pride and I don't  think Russia bashing would be a route to finding a wife.

Offline Warren

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Age difference and length married poll
« Reply #14 on: March 12, 2005, 05:19:16 PM »
Hi Guys:  I was married for 4 months to a Ukraine gal. She was both a liar and a thief. She took $15,000 and lied about it. I sent her packing back to Ukraine. Two years before I met her, she had been in a car wreck in Ukraine and was unconscious for 5 days in the hospital. She also was 4 months pregnant and lost the embryo. I believe that had something to do with her mental ability. Our age difference did not have anything to do with it. Altho, I was much older than she (34).  Anyway, I am back looking again but this time wiser and cautious. I will definitely use a "pre-marital agreement".

   In the poll, I wonder if the 5 year length of marriage has any bearing on the fact that it takes 5 years to get U.S. citizenship ?

 Warren

Offline Elen

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« Reply #15 on: March 12, 2005, 07:15:21 PM »
Quote
I guess you have to look at the fact that even back in the communist days when the whole family lived in a two room apartment and shared a bath and kitchen with another apartment or two and they waited in line for a pair of ill fitting shoes that fell apart in weeks that they were brainwashed constantly about how great thier country was.

Firstly I doubt the question was formulated pricely like "Do you think the USSR (Russia/Ukraine/..)  is the best country in the world? (eighther it's your own interpretation or mistranslation from Russian)

Secondary. Have ever the idea that Russians had another criterions for estimation of country than you had, crossed yours "washed" brains?

Offline Turboguy

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« Reply #16 on: March 12, 2005, 07:54:44 PM »
Hi Elen,

The question was formualted exactly that way.   My gal speaks very little english but she can write it fairly well.  The interpreter's English is virtually perfect.   That was the question.

Offline Elen

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« Reply #17 on: March 12, 2005, 09:06:48 PM »
well any way the list of "achievements" of our country you focused your attention at would prevent me personally to have any in common with you

Offline Coulter

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« Reply #18 on: March 13, 2005, 02:04:09 AM »
Quote from: Turboguy
Hi Elen,

The question was formualted exactly that way.   My gal speaks very little english but she can write it fairly well.  The interpreter's English is virtually perfect.   That was the question.
What about you speaking (and writing) Russian?

Offline Coulter

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« Reply #19 on: March 13, 2005, 02:06:52 AM »
Quote from: Elen
well any way the list of "achievements" of our country you focused your attention at would prevent me personally to have any in common with you
Yep, and that is why I do not understand why so many foreign men are looking for a bride with a soviet education. Well... the answer after all is too obvious... in two words: sex and money.

Offline Turboguy

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« Reply #20 on: March 13, 2005, 03:15:22 AM »
Quote from: Coulter
What about you speaking (and writing) Russian?

I seem to have a big mental block on that.   Let me see.  I currently own Pimsleur's Russsin 1 & 2   Rosetta Stone 1 & 2, Russian Fast and Easy,  Russian Now versions 3,5,7 & 8.  Barron's Russian (the official course of the state Dept)  and probably one or two more.   If you went out to my pickup truck right now and started it what would you hear coming from the speakers without me touching it.  Pimsleur's 2 lesson 16.

How many hours have I spent trying to learn Russian.  I could never count them but thousands.  How much Russian do I know.   Not enough to ask for a check.   I spent probably 30 hours trying to learn Spanish and know more Spanish than I do Russain and I studied French for 3 years in school a million years ago and with a little practice could be fluent in it but Russian just seems tough.

 

Offline Turboguy

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« Reply #21 on: March 13, 2005, 03:32:20 AM »
Quote
Quote from: Elen
well any way the list of "achievements" of our country you focused your attention at would prevent me personally to have any in common with you

Elen, I think both our countries have done some things in the past that they either are not or should not be proud off.   I hope that the world has gotten more civilized.   I hope the things that have happened in the past will not be repeated.   I do believe that any government which is not accountable to the people has more risk of being corrupt or tyrinical. 

There is a difference in the actions of the people and the actions of the government.  I look at World War II and it is amazing when you become aware of the bravery and courage and determination of the Russian People.   We paid a big price in the lives of our solders and people killed in that war, but it is a drop in the bucket compared to Russia.  

On the other had I see things like the Russian soldiers were ordered to stand their ground and often did not even have ammunition.   If they tried to retreat they were shot.  They were ordered to do things like attack a machine gun position with nothing but bare hands.   If they did not they were shot.   In one way it shows bravery and determination but in another it shows a sadness and a lack of concern for human life.   I realize it was desperate times and it resulted in victory.  Had they not this might be a very differnt world.  

I have a lot of respect for the Russian People.   They are well educated, they are very hard working.   They make family important in their lives.  They are very hospitable.  They have good personal habits.  They have more culture than most other places.  They have a love of country and family and are a proud and great people.   They are good athletes as well.   All in all, I think if they can ever get thier government to be less buracratic and more responsive to the needs of the people the country will go a long way.   They have made a lot of progress in this and I hope they don't backslide.

You are a very interesting person on this forum Elen.  You have some interesting ideas.  I may not agree with the things you say sometimes but you are definately very inteligent and really good at playing the devil's advocate and creating an interesting discussion.

 

Offline Elen

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« Reply #22 on: March 13, 2005, 03:50:46 AM »
Ah! It's Sunday afternoon I'm in melancholy and have no desitre to say something a-la "devil advocate"

Let's take a rest from my snarls, guys:D

Offline Elen

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« Reply #23 on: March 13, 2005, 04:19:09 AM »
Quote
They were ordered to do things like attack a machine gun position with nothing but bare hands.   If they did not they were shot


If ALL who attacked machine gun position with nothing but bare hands, did that ONLY because of they afraid to be short then you all now would study German language:?

 
Quote
In one way it shows bravery and determination but in another it shows a sadness and a lack of concern for human life
Depends on side of observation. From  my grand-mom's side who stood with her kids behind those who short panic-mongers it was exactly the concern for human life:?

You American just have a little idea what is it the war on your own territory . When every step back of you means a death for your wife and your children.

All information you post here about life in Russia I do know with out you.  At least there were years of "Hruschev's thaw" and 15 years of "dermocraty" during which we all were told a LOT of "truth" about our past.

As for me I try to show you another angle of view at all those events for you at least would be able to understand WHY it's so hard for your brides to leave behind their Motherland where there were not even soft toilet paper in hotels
« Last Edit: March 13, 2005, 08:43:00 AM by Elen »

Offline Coulter

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« Reply #24 on: March 13, 2005, 01:06:58 PM »
Quote from: Elen
If ALL who attacked machine gun position with nothing but bare hands, did that ONLY because of they afraid to be short then you all now would study German language:?

Sorry to say, Elen, that this is a cheap shot. The same argument was used recently against anti-war French government, that is: without the USA all Western Europe would now speak German... It never occurred to them that Western Europe would speak Russian! What a pity they came... quite at the end when the Reich was already over!

By the way, I speak German... :D

I think Turbo is seeing too many movies or maybe just one... by a French...

 

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