ML and Ukrainian Women.

[tim 360]

Women who want to talk to you about their previous men are telling you something about themselves...if you listen carefully.  No matter what they may say about the guy (+/-) they are really telling you much more about themselves.  Some women have a great need to discuss previous guys.

At first I used to think their need to talk about former guys was just plain rude and then I realized they just could not resist and usually they would paint the guy as unsuitable or not very nice in this or that way or he had a temper or whatever.  I would listen.

Some I would get to know better and in a short time I could easily see how they could drive a sane man absolutely crazy.  So I think if a women must tell you...just listen carefully about what she is really telling you about herself.

[Jumper]

ManLooking,

Don't take the meeting with the cousin at face value.  It is possible that the meeting with the cousin was less about hearing correct English and more about checking you out. 

Cousins can be close in Russia, essentially sisters (and I have the impression that the Russian words for the two are similar as I have been confused at times about who is a cousin and who is a sister).  The "gal" is interested in you, very interested.  She wants to know what her cousin thinks about you, e. g. does she believe you are a "good" man?

Evidently you passed with flying colors.  You should feel good.

Please keep reporting.  Very interesting.

Not being on the ground there, that  would be my guess as well.
Or a combination of both?  checking him out for his RW, and practicing a bit of english..
It seems very normal to me.. and seems to show a sincere interest of the RW , in ML..


I've always welcomed meeting any familiy or friends ,as it seems a good way to get further perspective,
and also to allow the RW (and the people she holds dear) to gain better knowledge of you.
It seems  natural progression of a begining relationship...

[facetrock]

  I think men and women talking about past relationships is normal. Do you really think you can spend the rest of your life with a man or woman without ever talking about previous relationships? I dont think its possible and its better to get whatever skeletons you have in the closet out in the open.

[Gator]

I think men and women talking about past relationships is normal. Do you really think you can spend the rest of your life with a man or woman without ever talking about previous relationships? 

There comes a time when the past does need to be discussed.  Just don't dwell on it so early in a relationship.  And once informed, it is best to let it go.

I spent  a total of more than 60 24-7 days with one RW before she showed me a photo of her ex-husband.  This same woman would become upset if I casually mentioned an episode with a past woman.  She wanted to start with a clean slate, with nothing hanging over us. 

I dont think its possible and its better to get whatever skeletons you have in the closet out in the open.

 

Is this Russian mentality?  After knowing her for a year, my ex-wife confided in me some sad episodes. I felt helpless other than to be empathetic.  It explained some of her character but raised more questions.  We even talked about therapy but never got to that point.

So let the closet keep its skeletons unless someone wants to bring them out.

[ML]

Upstream, I posted some recommendations for restaurants in Kharkiv.

Here are three more to add to the list.

Main dining room of Aurora Hotel on Artema street.  This restaurant is completely smoke free.  They do have a separate bar for smokers and a very complete cigar selection case (we just took a quick glance in).

Avlabar on Pushkinska between Ivanova and Petrovska.

Alibi on Krasina just off of Pushkinska.

A couple of unexpectedly good places right within Shevchenko Park also, but I forgot to note their names

Got taken royally last night at Chekhov restaurant on Petrovska, a place that I really like.  My own fault for letting my guard down.  The gal wanted a glass of wine.  She looking at menu in Russian and asking me what I thought etc.  Just then our waitress came by, so I said: "Ask her what she recommends."  They were blabbering back and forth and I got absent minded while looking at my menu for my main course selection.  So my gal just went with what the waitress recommended which I gather was not even listed on the wine list.  I never knew anything about price, and neither did my gal.  When the bill comes . . . the two glasses of wine cost about twice as much as all the other part of the meals!!  I have plenty of money, but I sure don't waste it like that on a regular basis.  My gal wasn't even impressed with any of my supposed 'non greediness' because she didn't even know what the wine cost.

Nearby on Myronosyiska just south of Petrovskogo is an authentic Irish Pub.  We took a walk through there also, but it allowes smoking in every room, nook and cranny.

And an update on McDonalds.  As reported here by others, many FSU people bad mouth them, and then we note the locations are packed full.  Rather than taking gals there, I got sausage, egg and cheese McMuffins and brought back to my apt for two gals for breakfast.  They thought the sandwiches were terrific.  Now asking me to repeat this.  I will try the same experiment for two other gals.

[ML]

After searching around, I determined that my new Asus Netbook does not have a photo fix-up program installed.

Anyone have a recommendation for one to download that is relatively small size and simple to understand and use?

[GoodOlBoy]

Rather than taking gals there, I got sausage, egg and cheese McMuffins and brought back to my apt for two gals for breakfast.  They thought the sandwiches were terrific. 

Hey ML.
Looks like you are doing OK?.....2 women at breakfast (same time). :evil:

GOB

[DaveY]

After searching around, I determined that my new Asus Netbook does not have a photo fix-up program installed.

Anyone have a recommendation for one to download that is relatively small size and simple to understand and use?

Try these:Link

Right now, I'm using Gimp and Paint.

[SANDRO43]

Try these:Link

Another could be IrfanView (downloadable from http://download.cnet.com/1770-20_4-0.html?query=IrfanView&tag=srch&searchtype=downloads&filterName=platform%3DWindows%2CWebware&filter=platform%3DWindows%2CWebware, among other sources). It has a LOT of optional plug-ins for all sorts of file types, including audio and video - in addition to pictures.

[Daveman]

Another could be IrfanView (downloadable from http://download.cnet.com/1770-20_4-0.html?query=IrfanView&tag=srch&searchtype=downloads&filterName=platform%3DWindows%2CWebware&filter=platform%3DWindows%2CWebware, among other sources). It has a LOT of optional plug-ins for all sorts of file types, including audio and video - in addition to pictures.

A second thumbs up for IrfanView.  great little program with many features and many more available through plugins. 

And yet another (freeware) viewer with some excellent editing capabilities is FastStone Image Viewer at www.faststone.org. Very, very nice viewer/editor.  Faststone also makes the absolute best screen capture utility I've ever used (though not free). 

You can't go wrong with either of those freebies... I have and do use them.. but...

Another (not free) but small and excellent viewer/editor is FireGraphic at www.firegraphic.com  $49.95 and is my personal favorite viewer/simple editor... absolutely love it...  I use this almost daily and jump to Photoshop (via the "External Editor" assignment button) for more extensive editing work. 

[ML]

Thanks to those who gave tips on the photo fix-up programs.
Haven't tried any yet.  A little worried about picking up a virus with downloads.

[ML]

As update on FSUW and McDonalds.

All 4 of my gals are now onboard for sausage, egg and cheese McMuffins.

And as well, I love their blini, cernike, oladi, etc. for breakfast.

[SANDRO43]

Haven't tried any yet.  A little worried about picking up a virus with downloads.

ML, most downoadables from CNET are virus-tested before being made available .

[ML]

Some minor problem.  One of my gals has early teen daughter whose mother now tells me has 'crush' on me.

Girl calls me frequently to ask about what is correct for her English lessons.  Sends me SMS during her classes to see if I agree with what teacher telling them in class.

Mother doesn't like it.  Says she knows not my fault.  Likes that the girl likes me; but thinks should stop.  I said fine: I will not answer her phone call or answer her SMS.  Mother says: 'No, that wouldn't be good either.'

[ML]

Just back from the Philharmonia (as spelled here).  More on that later.

Meanwhile back on the Lolita ranch:

Mother finally told girl she can only call me once a day and sms me once a day, and not during classes.  Reason given: because I am too busy for such.
Girl supposedly highly pissed . . . but not at me; rather the mother.  I guess that is good . . . but no wait; maybe that is bad!!

The father is very much in the life of this girl; and they have a good relationship.  He is actually only a few years younger than me.  He is photographer.  Makes zilch but works with the hot gals.  Mother of my gal (who was his model back when) told her it was foolish to marry him because he would always be surrounded by young hot chicks (probably not her choice of words) and she would lose him eventually.  He is now with local gal about 30 years younger than himself, but he 'updates' (or maybe it is downdates) every year or so.

He and I have met; and he is extremely happy I am in the picture.  Of course I know why, as he sees me as a cash cow.  To eliminate strain on himself by my helping pay for the needs of his children; and he has already pitched me a half dozen ideas on how he can use my money to make a fortune for the both of us.  Thinks I am as stupid as I look; I guess.  Even as he knows I am a professional at this investment business.

[GoodOlBoy]

Of course I know why, as he sees me as a cash cow.

Some words of advice ML.
I have a neighbor where I live that had to pay BIG $bucks$ to a Ukraine "absentee father" to get his signature on paperwork so the daughter could leave the country with the mother.
So beware!

GOB

BTW....Mother has been back to the Ukraine without the daughter. She is afraid that they will have to pay the dirt bag more money if daughter comes home to visit and tries to leave again.

[ML]

Another mild drama last weekend, with disaster avoided; probably.

Background note:  I started playing chess only about 5 years ago.  Mainly because on my business trips to FSU the men kept bugging me to play chess with them.  So I joined local club; read a couple of Chess for Idiots books; and progressed pretty well . . . probably because my business work requires constant high level analytical skills.

No, I have not any Chess Master points (never signed up for such), but I am able to give some of the top club players a 'run for their money.'

Current situation:  Went for entire day to a gal's parent's place on weekend. (Not Lolita's).  Before going, gal told me her father knew I played chess and wanted to play with me.

I said: Will he be mad if I beat him.
She (in typical FSUW fashion) said:  Don't be silly.  He has been playing since 5 years old, and you only for 5 years.  And besides, he is Russian man and you only American.  No one in family has ever beaten him and no friends either.

Then in about 10 minutes she said: But it would probably not be good if you do beat him.
So I say: Then I should be sure to lose; yes?
She: But you can't make it look that way because he will know, and then really be mad.

In another 10 minutes:  Probably you should beat him if you can.  He always said my ex, my sister's ex and her current were not smart enough to be in their family, so he will be happy to think you are smart.

Me (to myself): Sure I can just ratchet up and down as needed . . . not!

Anyway, I soon realized that I didn't have to worry about 'taking a fall' as he was a few tads better than I.  But I kept up a good game for about 2 hours before I was 'check mated.'

All seemed to be OK as he pronounced me as quite good for such little experience and that, with his help, I had real potential.

[ML]

This evening 19 Oct, went to Baroque Music Concert at Philharmonia.  Baroque music refers to period between Renaissance and Classical.  Performance featured works by Vivaldi, Handel, J.S. Bach, Rameau and Scarlatti.  5 players; 1 from Kharkiv and the other 4 visiting from Switzerland.

Only 2 'regular' current day instruments; violin and cello.  Others were a type of large lute, a couple of basic flute variations, and a clavichord.  The performance was quite good.

The Philharmonia is located in what was previously the Opera Theatre.  Gal (not related to Lolita nor Chess) warned me the hall likely to be quite chilly.  So we kept our outer coats on, I put on extra pair of socks, and she wore winter boots.  By intermission, the place warmed up enough to take off coats, but the floor still cold as if an ice rink were underneath.  So be prepared.

Before theatre, we went to Avlabar Pectopah on Pushkinski.  Great chicken with vegetables prepared Georgian style.

Tomorrow night go to ballet 'Gisele.'

[ML]

Oooooppps, sorry.  After I posted, I was looking downstream and noticed the Lolita posts were removed.

So by reference to that name, I am not trying to restart that sub-thread here.  Don't know where the sub-thread went or if it just plain deleted.

My only intent was to give update and answer questions about father.

[ML]

Last night went to ballet 'Gisele' at the Opera Theatre.  From the outside, this building appears as a huge monstrosity of monolithic bare concrete design with a little  F.L. Wright thrown in.  Inside, it comes across as quite pleasing to the eye.  It is on Sumsksa just down the street from the city square.

The seats were quite nice except they were covered in corduroy which had not been vacuumed for several years.  So anyone allergic to dust, take your antihistamine before attending.

I have seen this ballet several times in various FSU cities and in USA.  I would rate the performance as just OK.  I am far from expert, but I noticed that even the main performers sometimes had to take that extra little step to balance them self after they landed, etc.

So I would say it wasn't up to the standards of Kyiv, St Petersburg, etc.
Also frequently, after the 'story' is done, the performers do their specialty routines.  That didn't happen here.

[ML]

Surprised today to get SMS from two of the gals that I met with in May only for one date.  I had sent them a nice msg after that first meeting telling them thanks for their time, etc.  But I had never made any follow up contact.  I did mention in emails before first meeting that I would probably be returning in the Autumn.

Anyway, they both just said something like:  Hello, how are you.
I have no interest in either, but don't quite know what to reply.

[ML]

In new developments, a 5th early 40s woman is coming from Kyiv to spend 3 days with me.

I wrote some about her situation in another thread somewhere.  She is going to apply for student visa to come to USA to pursue Masters and Doctoral degree.  I knew her (now deceased 2009) husband since about 2002 and first met her about 6 years ago. 

She expressed interest in living in one of my houses in USA, and I had thought that she wanted me to pay her tuition also.  And I was willing to do that because her husband had been a very good friend of mine and had helped me make some good money a couple of times.

However, I now hear from her that she needs no money at all from me.  His last job was with a Belgium firm here in Ukraine and he had a quite large (even by American standards) insurance policy through the company.

Who knows!!

[Daveman]

Oooooppps, sorry.  After I posted, I was looking downstream and noticed the Lolita posts were removed.

So by reference to that name, I am not trying to restart that sub-thread here.  Don't know where the sub-thread went or if it just plain deleted.

My only intent was to give update and answer questions about father.

Those posts were split off into a thread which contains the name over to the unmentionable section!    No links provided because it is the unmentionable section! I could mention it, but then I'd have to split and move the mentioning of the unmentionable due to the inherent dementia in the mentioning of the unmentionable process.

[ML]

OMG . . . my visitor from Kyiv !!!

Causing me some serious consternation, without the fear part.

[ML]

Internet update.

Lastest scam for apartment owners and our 'helpers' here in Ukraine is to offer to 'rent' you an 'aircard modem' or some such name for $100 bucks plus usage fees for Mb or Gb of upload, download, etc.

This type of Internet hookup plugs into a USB port and uses the signal from mobile phone towers.  It can be useful where apt does not have high speed cable or DSL phone line.

And, it seems many apt owners are disconnecting the cable and DSL so they can earn from the aircard modem and usage.

But . . . you can buy these modems outright for $40-60.

I bought one here in Kharkiv from PeopleNet for $52 plus I prepaid $17 for 5.2 Gb of usage.

So starting with the first purchase, it is less than what the 'helpers' want to rent you the modem; and for future trips you only pay some usage time.

The other providers, KyivStar, MTC, Life, etc., all sell these aircard modems and time, some with monthly contract and some without.  Most of us will want the no-contract deals, of course.

I checked around, and PeopleNet was the best deal going . . . at this time.

I have only used a little over 1 Gb in 3 weeks, so I could have gotten by with prepaying for 2 Gb at $12.

When in Kharkiv, talk with Vloda (gal) at PeopleNet on Pushkinska.  She studied in Sweden and has excellent English . . . and is a computer jock; at least to get your modem installed, up and running.  All included in the $52 cost of modem plus $12 - 17 prepaid usage.  Yes, she is quite a 'looker' also in mid 20s.