Care package

[wallm]

So, I would like to send a care package every few weeks to the lady I am interested in. How do I ship it? USPS? UPS? FedEx? Does the customs in Ukraine open every package and impose duty when they want to and how do I pay it if they want me to pay some duty?

What are some interesting things that you guys may have sent I could consider. I have my own ideas of course.

[GQBlues]

So, I would like to send a care package every few weeks to the lady I am interested in. How do I ship it? USPS? UPS? FedEx? Does the customs in Ukraine open every package and impose duty when they want to and how do I pay it if they want me to pay some duty?....

Most folks we know use this: http://www.meest.us/eng/poslugi/dostavka_posilok/ukraina.html

We just use USPS, but for Russia not Ukraine.

[Brillynt]

I have sent packages many times using USPS over the last few years, it takes 2 to 3 weeks. I never had any problems with customs, I just put down that the items were not expensive on the customs declaration.  USPS won't allow certain items to be shipped so check out their website.  This includes perfume, but I shipped it anyways without putting it on the customs declaration. One thing I would suggest is to put her name and address in English and Russian on the package, just makes life easier for handling once it gets to Ukraine. Also it will not be delivered to her apartment, she will get a notification and will have to go pick it up from the post office. Your customs declaration will also be your tracking number so that you can track the package.  I always gave the tracking link to my wife so she could follow the package as well.

[LAman]

So, I would like to send a care package every few weeks to the lady I am interested in. How do I ship it? USPS? UPS? FedEx? Does the customs in Ukraine open every package and impose duty when they want to and how do I pay it if they want me to pay some duty?

What are some interesting things that you guys may have sent I could consider. I have my own ideas of course.

Yes, let's have the ladies fall for what you are as opposed to who you are. And raise their expectations......

[GQBlues]

Yes, let's have the ladies fall for what you are as opposed to who you are. And raise their expectations......

  

[JayH]

Most folks we know use this: http://www.meest.us/eng/poslugi/dostavka_posilok/ukraina.html

We just use USPS, but for Russia not Ukraine.

Meest is good system -- and once set up easy to use  .It is a tight system !

[Trenchcoat]

So, I would like to send a care package every few weeks to the lady I am interested in. How do I ship it? USPS? UPS? FedEx? Does the customs in Ukraine open every package and impose duty when they want to and how do I pay it if they want me to pay some duty?

What are some interesting things that you guys may have sent I could consider. I have my own ideas of course.

Care Package? As in basket of food, chockies, fruit, drink, etc. New one on me, I know many of the websites for Women's day do this stuff from about $50 - 100 or more depending on how much you want to send. Expensive compared to how much you can but this stuff for in Ukraine but of course when not there. I'm not sure if doing it yourself would end up any more cost effective or time effective. I know one of the sites I use delivers free on orders over $80. Weekly I think any 'care package' would add up but if you have deep pockets. In a way sending her the money would probably be more efficient use of money but is usually a big no-no with girl as can set a bad precedent with girl just seeing you as a cash machine and ruining the relationship. I'm not sure if a 'care package' would be a better way to show you care without being perceived as easily taken or just amounts to much the same. For me I think LA man may have a point I'm not sure why she would need one on a weekly basis, once every so often maybe, but its your call.

[wallm]

Shut up Trench. You talk too much. I said this already. I didn't say I will send her a care package on weekly basis. I said once every few weeks. This girl drives her own car and works two jobs. Doesn't need my money. For the first one I was thinking of framing a few of the pics we took together when I was there plus some Hershey's kisses which they don't have there as far as I know. Simple, sweet things. Don't you clowns turn this into another free for all thread.

[msmob]

Wallm

If you don't want this tread 'ruined by clowns' - the the wording of your title should be changed - as it COULD be interpreted as some sort of welfare 'care' as opposed to, "I wish to demonstrably care for you, care... "

TC, When you have actually been in this twilight zone  of having met someone you want to care for ... then you can offer 'advice' ..

[wallm]

Aptly put by the head clown. Thanks Moby.

[msmob]

Aptly put by the head clown. Thanks Moby.

Mozhet bit, kto eto deystvitelno kloun... dolzhen smotrit na obbraz v zerkale....  ?  Ti stazher

[Boethius]

Yes, let's have the ladies fall for what you are as opposed to who you are. And raise their expectations......

I disagree with you.  If a woman loves you for what you are, and is not a woman of dubious character, it would not matter whether you sent her stuff or not.  Same with raising expectations.

[calmissile]

I disagree with you.  If a woman loves you for what you are, it is a woman of dubious character, and it would not have mattered whether you sent her stuff or not.  Same with raising expectations.

Is this really what you meant to say?

[Boethius]

Heh, no, I didn't.


Corrected.  Thanks.

[BillyB]

USPS won't allow certain items to be shipped so check out their website.  This includes perfume, but I shipped it anyways without putting it on the customs declaration.

Customs officials in other countries can steal things especially if they're not on the list. Perfume bottles can break under rough handling. Flammable liquid and understandably restricted. Probably won't catch of fire but will certainly ruin the other items in the package.

[wallm]

Customs officials in other countries can steal things especially if they're not on the list. Perfume bottles can break under rough handling. Flammable liquid and understandably restricted. Probably won't catch of fire but will certainly ruin the other items in the package.

I am sending framed photos of us and some Hershey chocolate and some French candy I picked up in duty free shop last week.

[GQBlues]

I am sending framed photos of us and some Hershey chocolate and some French candy I picked up in duty free shop last week.

That's a wonderful gesture on your part there, wallm.

FWIW, and certainly not trying to lessen your generosity, FSU folks pride themselves with their local chocolates, and they're very candid about that.

In the event you asked in the future how she liked the Hershey's, don't be surprised to hear all about 'chocolate content' in these sweets. 

[wallm]

She loves Snickers and asked me about Hershey. Hence the idea to send it.

[Anotherkiwi]

...FSU folks pride themselves with their local chocolates, and they're very candid about that.

I'll second, third and fourth that!  One absolutely delicious brand that became my favourite in Russia was Вдохновение - nearly as good as Whittaker's!

[wallm]

I tried the local crap. They suck. At least the ones i tried. Apparently the President owns a chocolate company. Those absolutely suck. YMMV.

[BillyB]

See's Candy chocolate truffles are always a hit with the ladies no matter how good they think their candy is. They have some locations in NY. Get a box and she'll love you forever.

[whynotme]

Shut up Trench. You talk too much. I said this already. I didn't say I will send her a care package on weekly basis. I said once every few weeks. This girl drives her own car and works two jobs. Doesn't need my money. For the first one I was thinking of framing a few of the pics we took together when I was there plus some Hershey's kisses which they don't have there as far as I know. Simple, sweet things. Don't you clowns turn this into another free for all thread.

The girl works two jobs and doesn't need money?  Funny logic if you have any.  Check USPS prices for package, then decide if your artificial Hershey's worth it. I'm sure they have all this stuff in Ukraine even if you didn't see it. If your girlfriend knew how much it'll cost she'll say "Лучше б деньгами".
My future husband sent money monthly to me despite my 3 works and a good income. This money never were superfluous.
I shipped packages to my daughter living in Russia, it's about 100$ per large Priority Mail box, it takes about 2 weeks to deliver.

[JayH]

The girl works two jobs and doesn't need money?  Funny logic if you have any.  Check USPS prices for package, then decide if your artificial Hershey's worth it. I'm sure they have all this stuff in Ukraine even if you didn't see it. If your girlfriend knew how much it'll cost she'll say "Лучше б деньгами".
My future husband sent money monthly to me despite my 3 works and a good income. This money never were superfluous.
I shipped packages to my daughter living in Russia, it's about 100$ per large Priority Mail box, it takes about 2 weeks to deliver.

That does not translate so well for me--- basically you are saying that money is more useful ! ( correct me if I am wrong)
Also good post -- ( we have been here a few times previously !!  )the forum gets hung up on the scam/money issue and it only serves as a disservice in my view.
A little extra money goes a long way to making life easier and takes some pressure of a girl-- especially if she is inconveniencing her life to be in contact.
As my lady says-- you can't eat flowers !
Just on that point --last week I had sent money for flowers ( we know that she can buy far better flowers and value than thru sending agencies) . She promptly bought flowers for her mother and sister. e . btw  I knew from the colours and type of flowers that she bought that she did not intend them for herself !I had anticipated that -- and arranged flower delivery for her  as a surprise
I can't emphasise enough  what a good idea that proved to be !!

It is a REALLY REALLY important day to FSUW -- and never to be forgotten or ignored.
Sending stuff is a half good idea -- but--the principle is that it should be an extra --not instead of !

[JayH]

So, I would like to send a care package every few weeks to the lady I am interested in. How do I ship it? USPS? UPS? FedEx? Does the customs in Ukraine open every package and impose duty when they want to and how do I pay it if they want me to pay some duty?

What are some interesting things that you guys may have sent I could consider. I have my own ideas of course.

I just noticed the customs duty part of post-- that is best resolved in a way I previously indicated (pm) as the easiest and cost efficient way of handling business matters.
In years gone by -customs were a crooked nightmare - and depending on your likely capacity to pay would create delays.
Keep declared value nominal to real, and don't bother trying to send expensive stuff .
I would really hope that all this has improved -but have no recent experience to expand on.Often on arrival customs people will ask about gifts etc and money .  Being offhand works a treat !

[msmob]

I tried the local crap. They suck. At least the ones i tried. Apparently the President owns a chocolate company. Those absolutely suck. YMMV.

Chances are you've been brought up on local 'crap' - as many FSU chocs - like Roshen - taken from PoROSHENko - have higher chocolate content than many popular western brands ...

[wallm]

Chances are you've been brought up on local 'crap' - as many FSU chocs - like Roshen - taken from PoROSHENko - have higher chocolate content than many popular western brands ...

Yeah, that Roshen. It sucks. Like Cadbury, Nestle.....

There is no one size fits all fellas. We all have our own faves and tastes.

I am not looking at the cost of this as much as sentimental value.

I will checkout Billy's recommendation.

If it will make you all happy, I will wait for a few months and take a suitcase full with me.

[mhr7]

"Лучше б деньгами".

My ex in Ukraine used to say this which was fine with me it's easier to send money.

[msmob]

Yeah, that Roshen. It sucks. Like Cadbury, Nestle.....

Irrespective of subjective taste - you are showing ignorance as most Cadbury / Nestle 'Chocolate' offerings have much less actual chocolate than Roshen......   

As you are now dating one UA lady, she will probably not appreciate 'our crap' ..although she may be too polite to say so.

Luckily, SC hates chocolate ( sweet stuff ) full stop

[GQBlues]

...There is no one size fits all fellas. We all have our own faves and tastes.

I am not looking at the cost of this as much as sentimental value.

Good attitude! Follow your instinct. It isn't the content as much as it was the gesture to reach out anyway. At least now you know about this little tidbit.

Since she liked snickers, may I suggest a few rolls of ROLOS and a few Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. Maybe even a nice (travel/Points of Interest) book about the city you live in, etc...

[2tallbill]

I am not looking at the cost of this as much as sentimental value.

I will checkout Billy's recommendation.

If it will make you all happy, I will wait for a few months and take a suitcase full with me.

The cost/time of shipping largely negates the gesture. What I did was to develop
a network of helpers/secret agents. I had several mutual friends of Angel Eyes
and myself, I would send them $50 or so via Western Union and tell them to buy
her flowers or whatever. Some of my secret agents were tenacious shoppers and
I was constantly surprised how many flowers or candies they would get for my
buck.

Your girlfriends friends will all want to conspire with you (if they like you) to
do romantic things for your girl. Next time if you haven't done so already
exchange FB accounts or email addresses.

Udachi!

Bill

[jone]

The cost/time of shipping largely negates the gesture. What I did was to develop
a network of helpers/secret agents. I had several mutual friends of Angel Eyes
and myself, I would send them $50 or so via Western Union and tell them to buy
her flowers or whatever. Some of my secret agents were tenacious shoppers and
I was constantly surprised how many flowers or candies they would get for my
buck.

Your girlfriends friends will all want to conspire with you (if they like you) to
do romantic things for your girl. Next time if you haven't done so already
exchange FB accounts or email addresses.

Udachi!

Bill

A VERY smart guy!

[msmob]

Quite ..

'secret network'.. I use those, too

Took 'em all out for a meal to say thanks, last time ..

[BillyB]

I am not looking at the cost of this as much as sentimental value.

Sentimental value is important. Should you two live the rest of your lives together, you want her to have good memories of her first gifts. Hershey's chocolates aren't considered by those in the FSU as memorable. See's candies will. Made with real ingredients and when I bring a second box on a later visit, all the ladies eyes light up. They know the gold box full of truffles when they see it.

We recommend giving gifts from the country you're from. If you're living in America, buy gifts made in America, not France, Germany or China. Gift giving is making a statement. My wife told me her favorite gift out of the variety of first gifts I gave her was a scenic book of the state I live in. A lady can imagine why a man gives her that book. He's giving her a hint that he wants her to live there.

[Anotherkiwi]

We recommend giving gifts from the country you're from. If you're living in America, buy gifts made in America, not France, Germany or China. Gift giving is making a statement. My wife told me her favorite gift out of the variety of first gifts I gave her was a scenic book of the state I live in. A lady can imagine why a man gives her that book. He's giving her a hint that he wants her to live there.

Second that!  On my first trip, I gave the lady I went to see a scenic picture book of New Zealand, plus beautiful Merino woollen gloves for her, her mother and her daughter.  Even though the relationship went nowhere, the gifts were really appreciated.  She did something similar in return - a photo book of her city.

[whynotme]

Second that!  On my first trip, I gave the lady I went to see a scenic picture book of New Zealand, plus beautiful Merino woollen gloves for her, her mother and her daughter.  Even though the relationship went nowhere, the gifts were really appreciated.  She did something similar in return - a photo book of her city.

Walm was talking about sending something every few weeks on regular basis, not about gifts to bring with.

[Anotherkiwi]

Walm was talking about sending something every few weeks on regular basis, not about gifts to bring with.

I realise that, but all relationships have to start somewhere.  Bringing gifts on the first trip (nothing huge), and seeing her reaction to them, can be a good indicator as to what may happen in future.  Wallm is a lot further along the track than having a first visit.

[wallm]

Second that!  On my first trip, I gave the lady I went to see a scenic picture book of New Zealand, plus beautiful Merino woollen gloves for her, her mother and her daughter.  Even though the relationship went nowhere, the gifts were really appreciated.  She did something similar in return - a photo book of her city.

I didn't give her any gifts when I went. .

Seriously, if this "relationship" survives till say June/July when I go back, I might take her something/s. In the mean time, I will be sending her flowers & candy for her birthday next month. Jeez, this is getting expensive. (I am channeling Trenchcoat here. )

[JayH]

Shit. I didn't give her any gifts when I went. Fuk.

Seriously, if this "relationship" survives till say June/July when I go back, I might take her something/s. In the mean time, I will be sending her flowers & candy for her birthday next month. Jeez, this is getting expensive. (I am channeling Trenchcoat here. )

You will get dizzy trying to stay on top of special occasions and days !! Take my pm advice-at least after next visit or during if it is all working out!

[calmissile]

Second that!  On my first trip, I gave the lady I went to see a scenic picture book of New Zealand, plus beautiful Merino woollen gloves for her, her mother and her daughter.  Even though the relationship went nowhere, the gifts were really appreciated.  She did something similar in return - a photo book of her city.

Agree with both Billy and Kiwi.  Overdoing the gift giving has the appearance as trying to impress them with your relative wealth.  Some are even offended but still take the gifts.

It's my experience that not all FSUW expect continual gifts.  Billy's idea of bringing something made in America has more influence than an expensive locally purchased gift. Some maps and books about the USA not only made a good impression, but her friends were anxious to read them as well.  After your both "in love", it is more appropriate for more expensive and personal items.   Just my 2 cents from experience.

Edit:  Also a movie clip made while driving around my city, including shopping centers and the inside of supermarkets was also something that she and her friends seem to consider very appreciated.

[wallm]

Edit:  Also a movie clip made while driving around my city, including shopping centers and the inside of supermarkets was also something that she and her friends seem to consider very appreciated.

Good idea. I had been sharing pics of these things on Viber. Video next I suppose. Don't want to overdo it. Since her English is weak, I don't want anything get lost in translation and offend her.

[calmissile]

Good idea. I had been sharing pics of these things on Viber. Video next I suppose. Don't want to overdo it. Since her English is weak, I don't want anything get lost in translation and offend her.

Don't know why she would be offended.  I even went so far as a complete video inside and outside the house.  I figure if she had doubts or issues it is best to learn them early.  Also, anyone that has never been here is curious about where they will live.  It also spurred a lot of questions such as how far is the market, can I walk.  How far is a park, how far is school for my daughter, etc. Getting all this stuff out of the way early seemed to show my seriousness and also provided comfort in her future living conditions.  Don't know why she would be offended.  Also, we used various electronic translators which were good enough to convey questions and answers.

[msmob]

Good idea. I had been sharing pics of these things on Viber. Video next I suppose. Don't want to overdo it. Since her English is weak, I don't want anything get lost in translation and offend her.

Walllim,

If she's in to you, don't worry about 'offending' her .... Translations can be REALLY dangerous, sometimes - but she'll query it - if it doesn't sound like what she expects you might think.


 

[GQBlues]

I didn't give her any gifts when I went.

Seriously, if this "relationship" survives till say June/July when I go back, I might take her something/s. In the mean time, I will be sending her flowers & candy for her birthday next month. Jeez, this is getting expensive. (I am channeling Trenchcoat here. )

You guys spend way too much talk and energy in this pursuit.

It's no big deal, and never should be, that you'd like to send her a care package now. The thought will always outweigh the 'content'. Even back 10 years ago, *I* received care packages from 3 of the women I was corresponding with, guys...received 2 cards from another 2.

You guys are the 'men', and supposedly better off economically but you nickel and dime yourselves all the way to Timbukto.

Don't be such woosies about this. You get involved in so many rules and laws to a point you can no longer recognize your own selves.

If any of you cannot find the balance between being 'stupid' and being 'sane' at this age and stages in your lives, chrissakes man...stay the f@c#ked home and leave these *unsuspecting* women alone.

[wallm]

You guys spend way too much talk and energy in this pursuit.

It's no big deal, and never should be, that you'd like to send her a care package now. The thought will always outweigh the 'content'. Even back 10 years ago, *I* received care packages from 3 of the women I was corresponding with, guys...received 2 cards from another 2.

You guys are the 'men', and supposedly better off economically but you nickel and dime yourselves all the way to Timbukto.

Don't be such woosies about this. You get involved in so many rules and laws to a point you can no longer recognize your own selves.

If any of you cannot find the balance between being 'stupid' and being 'sane' at this age and stages in your lives, chrissakes man...stay the f@c#ked home and leave these *unsuspecting* women alone.

Ever heard of tongue in cheek? Look it up.

[msmob]

Ever heard of tongue in cheek? Look it up.

You are coming across like Trench - when 'busted' - it always a joke ..

[wallm]

You are coming across like Trench - when 'busted' - it always a joke ..

I am busted.

I have a chance to build a life with a gorgeous, smart and classy lady. I am pursuing her. That is all there is to it. I don’t care about uninformed opinions.

[Boethius]

I have to agree, Roshen candies are not that great.  Hershey sucks too.

The best FSU candies are from the Red October factory.  Their candies, and mishka kosolapi, are the only ones my kids would choose in the candy bins at the Russian store.  Personally, I prefer local artisanal chocolate.

[wallm]

Does a letter take weeks to get there sent by USPS? It has no declared value of course since goods are not being shipped.

[JayH]

Does a letter take weeks to get there sent by USPS? It has no declared value of course since goods are not being shipped.

8 -14 days

Be careful of content being obvious.

I have posted(mailed)  and it arrived in Kyiv quicker than connections I can make ( at absolute best) inside of 20 hours-- then took 3 weeks ! On average -about what I indicated above - so better is possible  -- & worse !