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Author Topic: My wife is amazing...  (Read 33037 times)

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Offline DaveNY

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #75 on: May 25, 2018, 09:23:23 PM »
What is a common event after a meeting is everybody goes home alive and unhurt.

Why would everyone go home alive and unhurt? The admirer wants Deccie's wife and if he can afford to gift the wife a villa he can take her if he wants and Deccie can do nothing to prevent it. The admirer probably owns the police so nothing will happen to him. For him this is being reasonable. Deccie and his wife are the unreasonable ones by not bowing to his wishes.

Leaving the country is not an option. Deccie and his wife tried doing nothing but nothing hasn't worked since things have escalated. Doing nothing has now become more dangerous than doing something.

So Deccie and his wife stay in the country. The tax office takes whatever they want from Deccie and his wife. Taking the tax office to court is a no go because the court is probably in on the scam. Then the admirer takes Deccie's wife because he can and Deccie can't stop him. This is what you're saying.


Every man here should put themselves in Deccie's shoes. They should think what can they do to help their wife if she is harassed relentlessly. If their wives asked to have a meeting in a restaurant or her workplace in a conference room with the guy, they shouldn't hesitate to do what their wives want. Whatever a husband and wife decides together to solve the problem and regardless of the outcome, they shouldn't live with regrets.

My wife says you don't understand Russia. She say Russia is a mafia state at all levels. Her words translate as criminal however I prefer the term mafia it sounds more corrupt to me. Same meaning different words.

Offline Davo2

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #76 on: May 25, 2018, 09:55:54 PM »
I was going to add this to my last post.

Deccie is better just to let his wife handle it. If he starts making waves, it just tells the other man that he's feeling insecure. He's lucky, he has a wife with great morals, something the other man lacks.

For a man who has obviously bought women's affections before, being rejected by a strong, intelligent and attractive woman is the biggest insult.

Showing that this man is of no consequence or a threat to him and he's not even worth worrying about, sends a far stronger message than looking insecure.

I used to date a stunning 28 year old a few years ago. She was always getting hit on, even in front of me. Watching her shut the younger guys down and them sulking off with their tail between their legs, was much more satisfying than me getting involved.

« Last Edit: May 25, 2018, 10:09:33 PM by Davo2 »

Offline alex330

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #77 on: May 25, 2018, 09:57:47 PM »
Deccie is better just to let his wife handle it. If he starts making waves, it just tells the other man that he's feeling insecure. He's lucky, he has a wife with great morals, something the other man lacks.

For a man who has obviously bought women's affections before, being rejected by a strong, intelligent and attractive woman is the biggest insult.

Showing that this man is of no consequence or a threat to him and it's he's not even worth worrying about, sends a far stronger message than looking insecure.


Pretty much. Unless he gets crazy and crosses a line, better to let her just shut him down.

Offline DaveNY

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #78 on: May 25, 2018, 10:22:08 PM »

Pretty much. Unless he gets crazy and crosses a line, better to let her just shut him down.

If the admirer, who has offered Deccie's wife a villa in another country, doesn't take no for an answer and decides to kidnap her what is she going to do? Fight off his ex military bodyguards?

As my wife has said if he's that wealthy he has his own corp of bodyguards and probably even has his own paramilitary group. How would Deccie's wife resist? How would Deccie protect his wife and himself?

I would like to know. Even my wife is interested in knowing how a woman is going to fight off a man who won't take no for an answer and his bodyguards.

Offline BillyB

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #79 on: May 25, 2018, 10:37:18 PM »
What would you do Billy?


If my wife asked me to talk to the guy, I would look her dead straight in the eyes and say "NO! If he takes you, I'm willing to share you with him. If he takes you away forever, I can always find another wife but I can't do that if I'm dead." ..............I'm not going to do what Moby or JayH would do.

Edit - found it.


The guy may not want to meet but if he does, I would sure friends and family back home know about the meeting, then call the embassy and asked to speak directly to the Ambassador. Give him the scoop and ask if he can back me up. If during the meeting with the businessman we get along fine, then great. If I sense he doesn't like me. I will pass him a number to call my friend at the embassy to vouch we have a happy marriage.

No matter how bad those people are in Russia, there's always somebody more dangerous. They wouldn't want to create an international incident over a few hours of fun with a married woman. Putin has bigger things to worry about.

When I was in high school and seen a bully push a guy like Moby or JayH, I would walk up to the bully and push him down and say "Do you like how that feels?" Never lost a fight.

I joined the Army not in peacetime but during the first Gulf War. I have no problem sticking a knife in someone's throat or putting a bullet in their head if I felt they are bad for this world.

I run construction company. I work with other companies who's employees aren't the finest people in the world. Over half my employees been in jail and aren't the finest people in the world. I'm used to dealing with rough people. They don't scare me. Dying doesn't scare me. I'd rather die on my feet than live on my knees. So if my wife needs help at a risk to my life, I wouldn't hesitate to give her help.

he can take her if he wants and Deccie can do nothing to prevent it.


Russia can take Ukraine if they want it and Ukraine can't stop it. Might as well raise the white flag and hand the country over? How about a little resistance to deter aggressive behavior? If true the guy wants Deccie's wife at all cost, he'll definitely get what he wants with no resistance when doing nothing. So now doing something is better than doing nothing.

So Deccie and his wife stay in the country. The tax office takes whatever they want from Deccie and his wife. Taking the tax office to court is a no go because the court is probably in on the scam. Then the admirer takes Deccie's wife because he can and Deccie can't stop him. This is what you're saying.


I never said Deccie can't stop him. Other men have said that and recommended doing nothing or running away. Deccie and his wife feel they can beat the tax scam so it's their decision to do so. Paying the outstanding taxes may allow his wife to travel again.

My wife says you don't understand Russia. She say Russia is a mafia state at all levels.


I understand Russia very well. It's why I tell people don't live there. I also understand when my wife needs help and that is priority over understanding the feelings of bad guys. No married man wants to be in this position but shit happens a lot in the FSU. Some posters claim it's a great place to live when married men go through the same problems Deccie is experiencing everyday.

As my wife has said if he's that wealthy he has his own corp of bodyguards and probably even has his own paramilitary group.


Let's not speculate. What we do know is the woman successfully crushed the guys balls without bodyguards or a private army intervening.

Alright guys, who's next? I told what I'd do. What would you do if you couldn't leave, the situation is escalating, and the wife asks for your help? Be brave and wear Deccie's shoes for a moment.
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Offline Sting23

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #80 on: May 25, 2018, 10:41:11 PM »
well if Deccie's wife crushed the dude's balls so hard she's probably got him under control.  Sounds like he's just enamoured with her and trying to buy affection like many rich guys do.

All this speculation about bodyguards kidnapping her seems far fetched even in Russia. 

Offline alex330

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #81 on: May 25, 2018, 11:58:59 PM »
I would like to know. Even my wife is interested in knowing how a woman is going to fight off a man who won't take no for an answer and his bodyguards.

Hard to say. Every situation is different and we don't know all the facts here. The whole thing may be a story for all we know (Deccie seems pretty straight though, so I believe him)

What does he do for a living? Is he aggressive?

I deal with similar situations all the time with my wife. She flies the super wealthy around the World and they always hit on her or offer her xyz. Nobody has offered my wife a villa yet though, so that's a new one...

My wife is usually able to shut the guys down quickly, only a few times has there been an major issue.

If I was in Deccie's shoes? Hard to say, need more info. If it was in Russia it would be easier for me to deal with than here though. Wife knows the owner of one of the largest sports betting operations in Moscow.

Offline alex330

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #82 on: May 26, 2018, 12:03:50 AM »
The guy may not want to meet but if he does, I would sure friends and family back home know about the meeting, then call the embassy and asked to speak directly to the Ambassador. Give him the scoop and ask if he can back me up.


I have found embassies are usually not very helpful and have their hands tied. Just my experience dealing with them on multiple occasions in LATAM.

Offline alex330

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #83 on: May 26, 2018, 12:09:18 AM »
We are aware of that risk and are taking appropriate precautions. We do have a family member in power that can help us as a last resort. But I won't indicate here who he is or what position he has.


That's what I would do if I was Deccie.

Offline msmob

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #84 on: May 26, 2018, 12:20:35 AM »
If my wife asked me to talk to the guy, I would look her dead straight in the eyes and say "NO! If he takes you, I'm willing to share you with him. If he takes you away forever, I can always find another wife but I can't do that if I'm dead." ..............I'm not going to do what Moby or JayH would do.
 

 :ROFL:

"I understand Russia", says BillyB ...and Russian wives and most of us here know otherwise..


My wife says you don't understand Russia.

Who seriously believes anyone would be as 'pragmatic' as BillyB suggests re a breakup  ?

Offline mhr7

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #85 on: May 26, 2018, 12:41:02 AM »
If my wife asked me to talk to the guy, I would look her dead straight in the eyes and say "NO! If he takes you, I'm willing to share you with him. If he takes you away forever, I can always find another wife but I can't do that if I'm dead." ..............I'm not going to do what Moby or JayH would do.
Say this to a woman and she'll go with the other man very willingly. Alex is right, the embassy isn't going to do anything but offer advice and this man isn't going to be concerned with what an American official says anyway.

Quote
So if my wife needs help at a risk to my life, I wouldn't hesitate to give her help.
??????????

Quote
I understand Russia very well.
I don't think so.
« Last Edit: May 26, 2018, 12:52:44 AM by mhr7 »
"After your death, you will be what you were before your birth." - Schopenhauer

Online krimster2

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #86 on: May 26, 2018, 06:19:54 AM »
oh my, a gulf war veteran
your 100 hours of combat in a mechanized armor division in the desert
will be useful in a Moscow office building...???

anyone can kill anyone
drunk baboshka’s kill their drunk husbands with a potato peeling knife on a daily basis in Russia
you don’t get to feel like a man for killing someone
the feeling of taking somone’s life sucks big time actually and doesn’t ever go away
if you ever had this experience
you find yourself taking measures to have to not repeat it, just sayin’...
so I will assume that you haven’t “been there”
and this is all your little “hero fantasy”, cuz that’s really all this is...

i find it incredible that you think taking an oligarch’s life would be without consequences
and that you think everyone would be so intimidated by your actions that they’d leave you alone
ignorance kills
in this case you

who would kill you first?
the police, and then steal everything you own inc bank accounts, property?
his family?
his mafia partners?
will they also kill your family?

if you live in Russia, you want a hassle free life
this means
low profile
don’t make waves
don’t make enemies
don’t let little problems turn into big ones because of your attitude
don’t ever escalate - always de-escalate
you must practice economy of force - always do the minimum to achieve a goal

understand this, living in Russia means getting peppered daily by rude offensive behavior of all different kinds, you can’t have an extreme reaction every time this happens
you have to learn to roll with it, it’s part of the authentic cultural experience of Russia

BTW, American embassy will not help you
I was arrested in Honduras in 1987 for a curfew violation and detained for 24 HR, my phone call was to the US embassy who said “how unfortunate”....

Offline BillyB

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #87 on: May 26, 2018, 07:19:14 AM »
Say this to a woman and she'll go with the other man very willingly.


Why are you telling me that? I'm not the one who recommends doing nothing and allowing the wife to deal with it alone.

if you live in Russia, you want a hassle free life
this means
low profile
don’t make waves
don’t make enemies
don’t let little problems turn into big ones because of your attitude
don’t ever escalate - always de-escalate
you must practice economy of force - always do the minimum to achieve a goal


I'm sure Deccie and many others done what you recommend and they don't live hassle free lives in the FSU. What you recommend is what I recommend to Deccie. Doing nothing has escalated the situation. I recommend Deccie de-escalating.


I have found embassies are usually not very helpful and have their hands tied. Just my experience dealing with them on multiple occasions in LATAM.

The embassy was very helpful to me one time and my Congressman helped me twice pertaining to Visas. Squeaky wheel gets the grease. Don't squeak or squeak properly, don't get grease.
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Offline mhr7

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #88 on: May 26, 2018, 07:44:07 AM »
Why are you telling me that? I'm not the one who recommends doing nothing and allowing the wife to deal with it alone.
Quote
If my wife asked me to talk to the guy, I would look her dead straight in the eyes and say "NO! If he takes you, I'm willing to share you with him. If he takes you away forever, I can always find another wife but I can't do that if I'm dead."

This is doing nothing and allowing your wife to deal with it alone.
"After your death, you will be what you were before your birth." - Schopenhauer

Offline BillyB

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #89 on: May 26, 2018, 07:52:23 AM »
This is doing nothing and allowing your wife to deal with it alone.

 :wallbash: :wallbash: :wallbash: Don't quote the sentence out of context.  It means something different if you quote the whole paragraph. Then look up the word "sarcasm".
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Offline mhr7

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #90 on: May 26, 2018, 08:13:01 AM »
:wallbash: :wallbash: :wallbash: Don't quote the sentence out of context.  It means something different if you quote the whole paragraph. Then look up the word "sarcasm".
You've said so many ridiculous things on this forum it's not always easy to see a distinction between your sarcasm and your reality.
"After your death, you will be what you were before your birth." - Schopenhauer

Online krimster2

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #91 on: May 26, 2018, 09:39:08 AM »
"embassy was very helpful to me one time and my Congressman"

two completely different things and depends on the particular embassy

Offline msmob

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #92 on: May 26, 2018, 09:48:17 AM »
:wallbash: :wallbash: :wallbash: Don't quote the sentence out of context.  It means something different if you quote the whole paragraph. Then look up the word "sarcasm".

Really, you cannot see ANY irony in your indigence ?

Fact is you are busted for twisting to suit who is tearing your stance apart .. When the likes of JayH and I suggested NOT interfering and even distancing the wife from the stalker - you mocked us - as if you were some sort of Rambo ...

Can't you remember what you posted in the last 24 hours ?

 

Offline whynotme

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #93 on: May 27, 2018, 12:01:19 AM »
A couple of days back my wife met with one of her wealthy clients. A very wealthy client. Probably the richest guy in this city at least. As she got into his car  for him to drop her back at the office he put his hand at a very inappropriate place... My wife crushed his balls so hard he could not drive away for the next 20-30 minutes... :couple:
Next day he sent 350 roses to her office...
Seriously?  ;) The bouquet should weigh about 25-30 kg.
I reminded one anecdote.
- Doctor, my neighbor is 80 years old, and he says that he has sex 7 times a night.
- What is your problem? Say the same thing...

Offline ML

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #94 on: May 27, 2018, 06:33:59 AM »
Seriously?  ;) The bouquet should weigh about 25-30 kg.
I reminded one anecdote.
- Doctor, my neighbor is 80 years old, and he says that he has sex 7 times a night.
- What is your problem? Say the same thing...

Finally a sensible comment.
I said the same at beginning.
"It is getting deep in here."
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline BillyB

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #95 on: May 27, 2018, 09:12:30 AM »

I once had an employee who always came to me with a problem. I told him every job we've ever done was finished. Problems always get solved. I told him stop coming to me with a problem and instead bring me a solution.

I've seen over 60 posters read this thread at any given time. I'm sure most are men and most of them don't offer a solution. Some just talks about the problems in Russia.

Deccie said running away isn't an option and doing nothing hasn't stopped the man from pursuing his wife. Let's give Deccie a solution by telling him what YOU"D do in his situation.

Obviously Deccie has talked to his wife about a solution. If YOUR wife said she'll handle it, you guys can rest easy that you are not called upon to do your manly duties of protecting the family. You guys remember that wedding vow to always protect the wife from harm?

BUT let's say your wife says the best option with the business man to talk to him and give him the impression you two have a happy and solid marriage, would you do it? For me, this is an easy answer but some men here aren't answering the question. Even Deccie, who is actually in this situation, said he's willing to talk to the guy.

I understand many men here would not go to war for their country. I get it. What I don't get is many men here won't go to war for their wife/family. In this situation you don't even have to go to war, just talk to the guy if your wife asks. The answer is a simple yes or no but all I hear is silence.


"embassy was very helpful to me one time and my Congressman"

two completely different things and depends on the particular embassy

I would hope an embassy would be more willing to help a person who's family is in danger over a person like me who needed help with visas. I wonder if Deccie's embassy can help his family get out of the country on a military plane?
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Offline alex330

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #96 on: May 27, 2018, 10:00:29 AM »
Let's give Deccie a solution by telling him what YOU"D do in his situation.


He mentioned the solution on the first page Billy. I already quoted it. That's his best option.

Offline ML

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #97 on: May 27, 2018, 10:06:30 AM »
I wonder if Deccie's embassy can help his family get out of the country on a military plane?

Yes . . . whenever a woman experiences sexual harassment, a military plane should be used to get her and her family out of the country.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline DaveNY

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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #98 on: May 27, 2018, 10:15:28 AM »
I once had an employee who always came to me with a problem. I told him every job we've ever done was finished. Problems always get solved. I told him stop coming to me with a problem and instead bring me a solution.

I've seen over 60 posters read this thread at any given time. I'm sure most are men and most of them don't offer a solution. Some just talks about the problems in Russia.

Deccie said running away isn't an option and doing nothing hasn't stopped the man from pursuing his wife. Let's give Deccie a solution by telling him what YOU"D do in his situation.

As I mentioned before if this admirer is some comparatively rich guy is a small town in the middle of nowhere he might not be a problem however if he's the local billionaire in a city of a million plus he's a big problem. The latter seems the more likely option since Deccie said he offered his wife a villa in another European country. Here's why this admirer might be very dangerous by the numbers:

1. He's really, really rich. In Russia the 1% of the 1% feel even more entitled than they do in the US and Europe.
2. He probably has his own bodyguard unit with lots of bodyguards. Many ex military. In Russia the very rich really do need lots of bodyguards for protection.
3. He probably owns a number of local/regional cops, government officials and maybe military officials.
4. He might very well have his own private militia unit. These units sometimes have semiofficial status and work with the local cops and local state/national military.
5. Maybe he has influence in the Kremlin?
6. The murder rate in Russia is astronomically higher than in the US. About 2.5 times higher. This is really depressing when you consider that the US has far more guns.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_intentional_homicide_rate#By_country   
7. People disappear all the time in Russia, especially women.  http://www.pravdareport.com/history/30-10-2008/106646-people_disappear-0/
http://www.elle.com/uk/life-and-culture/longform/a40924/russia-domestic-violence-victims-fight-for-their-lives/


Obviously Deccie has talked to his wife about a solution. If YOUR wife said she'll handle it, you guys can rest easy that you are not called upon to do your manly duties of protecting the family. You guys remember that wedding vow to always protect the wife from harm?

BUT let's say your wife says the best option with the business man to talk to him and give him the impression you two have a happy and solid marriage, would you do it?

Would I talk to the guy? It depends. Before talking to him I'd want to find out everything about him I could. For instance:
1. Does he have a history of mental instability?
2. Have former girlfriends or wives disappeared? Have they been physically harmed?
3. Have former friends or enemies of his disappeared?
4. Have family members disappeared? Have they been harmed by him?
5. Does he travel with a number of bodyguards?
6. What properties around town does he own?
7. Does he own local police, politicians, judges, prosecutors?
8. If he a target for harm by criminals or others?
9. Can my embassy help? Can they get me out of the country secretly if needed?
10. Can I design a plan to get my family out of the country?

If the answers, as best as you can determine, to all of these questions is 'no' I'd try talking to him. If the answers to these questions is 'yes', especially to questions 1, 2, 3, 4 then talking doesn't seem like a good idea.




Offline BillyB

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  • Gender: Male
  • Spouse's Country: Ukraine
  • Status: Married 5-10 years
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Re: My wife is amazing...
« Reply #99 on: May 27, 2018, 11:43:41 AM »
He mentioned the solution on the first page Billy. I already quoted it. That's his best option.


He said he has a family member with some power but he also said he thinks a meeting of some kind is necessary in another post. He and I so far has admitted we'd do that for our wives.

Yes . . . whenever a woman experiences sexual harassment, a military plane should be used to get her and her family out of the country.


Some guys want to pack up the whole family and run when someone with money touches their wife. When you can't depend on the local police to enforce the law, maybe one can depend on their own military? When my fiancée, now wife, was living in Tripoli, Libya, I told her NATO is bombing a road for the rebels to Tripoli and they are very close now. She said it's safe in Tripoli and the problems are on the other side of the country. I told her not to believe the State run news, pack up her stuff and get ready to leave. Get the Ukrainian embassy's phone number and call them to figure out what to do in case of emergency. That night she couldn't sleep because gunfire sounded off for the first time in the Capital. Her and her mom did call the Ukrainian embassy and got to the airport and on a military plane and escaped the war.

Would I talk to the guy? It depends. Before talking to him I'd want to find out everything about him I could. For instance:
1. Does he have a history of mental instability?
2. Have former girlfriends or wives disappeared? Have they been physically harmed?
3. Have former friends or enemies of his disappeared?
4. Have family members disappeared? Have they been harmed by him?
5. Does he travel with a number of bodyguards?
6. What properties around town does he own?
7. Does he own local police, politicians, judges, prosecutors?
8. If he a target for harm by criminals or others?
9. Can my embassy help? Can they get me out of the country secretly if needed?
10. Can I design a plan to get my family out of the country?

If the answers, as best as you can determine, to all of these questions is 'no' I'd try talking to him. If the answers to these questions is 'yes', especially to questions 1, 2, 3, 4 then talking doesn't seem like a good idea.


Dave, I'm sure Deccie and his wife thought about most of those "what ifs" before making their decision to have a meeting with the businessman. I'm sure Deccie's wife thought about who she was dealing with before crushing his balls.

Regardless if you or any man here thinks their wife is wrong, if she asks for help in the form of a meeting, would you or any man refuse your wife?

My goal for joining the Army during the first Gulf War was to serve my country and help the people of Kuwait. Those things were more important to me that the thought of personal survival and staying away from bodily harm. Some people thought the war was about oil and not about liberating Kuwait. I do not care about their reasons, I only cared about mine. Assuming all possible solutions have been considered and used with no fruitful results, in a situation like Deccie's, my wife's reasons to have me take action to make her life easier would be more important than mine even if I thought it didn't make sense and would get me hurt. I would be ashamed if I refused my wife's request and my wife got hurt. That scenario should be factored into the "what ifs" list.

Wife asks for help after all factors factored in. Answer is yes or no. Hesitating is as good as a "no" answer for the health of a man's marriage.
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

 

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