Moving to a small town... Big city vs small town

[fandelau]

Hello ladies:
I'm in the middle of my search for my queen. Currently I'm corresponding with a woman from Minsk, Belarus... no, I haven't met her yet, but I plan to do so next year. I have told her that I live in a big city (Phoenix, Arizona), but now I have to move, due to work, to a small town (Bentonville, Arkansas). Being a big city guy myself I know it will be a little bit of an adjustment for me... ok, ok, there is a mid size city 43 Kms south, and a big city 200 Kms west from my future small town, so I guess the change wont be so traumatic. Besides, I think I can use the slow pace of a small town and enjoy life a little more  ...
My question is, would it be hard to adjust to a small town for a big city RW, or like me, it depends?
Thanks in advance for your comments.
Poka!

Ramon

[Lily]

Hi Ramon,

Welcome to the board, first of all!

You would probably ask your lady this question.

It depends on the individual, I think. Some prefer living in a megapolis not because of its pace and apparent boost of life, but because of her work that is necessary for people to support themselves. It is apparent that for many people a big city means a variety of options for locating a job. If a woman would get support from her husband, she may eventually change her preferences.

Very individual solution, IMHO.

[Turboguy]

I have always believed who you are with is more important that where you are.  My wife moved from a fairly large city to where we live now which is around 10,000.  We have had no real issues with where we live.

Big cities tend to have excitement, an endless array of restaurants, always things to do, lots of job opportunities and lots more.  Small cities tend to have friendlier people, a more relaxed atmosphere, less congestion and other pluses. 

One plus to small towns is that I had to teach my wife to drive.  I think it would have been a very daunting experience in a large city and I think I would have to worry even more when she is out trucking around on her own.   

I tend to agree with Lily.  Some women might find the adjustment hard others would not.  A happy person is a happy person and where they are is not going to change that.  I think too that all small towns are not created equal.  Bentonville to me would be a much easier adjustment than Billings MT or Fairmont MN. 

[I/O]

Fandelau: You'll have all the feel good BS under the sun fed to you on this one. The reality is, she'll struggle for a while, maybe longer.

I/O

[Misha]

My question is, would it be hard to adjust to a small town for a big city RW, or like me, it depends?

Keep in mind that she will likely be going through culture shock the first year. As she is going through the culture shock, she is likely going to blame the fact that she is in a small town on her not being happy. If she were in a big city, she would cite some other cause. One way or another, you have to expect a lot of tears and adjusting, small town or not.

[Blues Fairy]

Depends on her goals.  If she wants career and entertainment, she won't be too happy about this move.  If, on the contrary, she wants to start and raise a family, a small town is just the thing.

I am from Moscow myself; my husband and I live in Raleigh NC but we rarely go downtown unless there's a particularly interesting jazz show on.  In all other respects, the outskirts where we live are just like any other suburban area in the US.  I just returned from a trip to NYC (drove myself there and back with a stop in DC both ways) and I'll think twice before I do that again.

[GoodOlBoy]

Hello Ramon. You definitely need to speak to your lady about this topic. It can be a deal breaker for some women. Especially the women who live in larger cities (1 million +) people. Some of these women will NEVER live in a "village".

[Shadow]

Hi,

I do not know about Minsk, but to a woman from the suburbs for Moscow the whole US is a village (got it frm the horses mouth) so it won't make a difference. 
As all above said, it depends on the individual. We are currently planning a move to a more quieter surrounding as the suburb we are living now gets more 'cityfied' in many ways. My wife was raised in Moscow, whiche means a full city-woman.

[groovlstk]

Hi,

I do not know about Minsk, but to a woman from the suburbs for Moscow the whole US is a village (got it frm the horses mouth) so it won't make a difference. 

Times Square can be intimidating even to a Moscow woman 

This argument has been beaten to death over the years, you can explain it to your gf until you're blue in the face but she probably has no basis of comparison. Comparing a small US town to a FSU village is impossible and probably dangerous as her perception will not be of some idyllic little burg with all the creature comforts needed for day-to-day easy living.

[Faux Pas]

Ramon

Actually Bentonville isn't really all that small anymore. Sure it doesn't have the brick, granite and concrete of your larger cities but it is all getting merged together in other NW Arkansas towns and offering much the amenities of the very much larger cities. I know it's not Phoenix but trust me, there are a few of us who are from sure enough small towns. Bentonville isn't one....L

But another question, why the wait until next year to visit? Is it possible to get a visa for Belarus now?

[Jazzyclassy]

I moved from Moscow to a small town in the UK and i should say i miss a lot of the city and its business and its active lively spirit, but i do not miss huge enormous crowds and  crazy  grumpy people in metro , polluted air and atmosphere of pressure. It's been 3 months for me here and am slowly adapting , it depends on a person though , i like both village and the city, but cos i was born in a busy rushy city i think i will always be happy surrounded by a little more people than village has, sometimes you go to the shop and might never meet anyone at all:))) during your trip to town centre. Though i adore amazing nature here, great fresh air, and rabbits and squirrels and all alive beings:) running around. I will always love visiting cities and go out there  to my home town Moscow  and to  London but i can say it is nice and calm living in  the village there are advantages and disadvantages in both.In Moscow there are more jobs available and in the village you struggle to find one,but these are challenges which we have to take  to keep developing:)

[mrs.Shadow]

Hello Fandelau,

There are two factors which can play role:

1. Woman's individuality. What she likes. Probably, being a city girl she wants to change to a more quiet place (tired from crowds of people and more safety feelings for family - big city - big problems)

2. What town you will move to is looking like. If it is farms with farmers doubt she will like it. Conditions of roads, shopping support, etc. All this can play role for city woman in a part of comfortable living as she imagine it.

[2tallbill]

Hello ladies:
I'm in the middle of my search for my queen. Currently I'm corresponding with a woman from Minsk, Belarus... no, I haven't met her yet, but I plan to do so next year. I have told her that I live in a big city (Phoenix, Arizona), but now I have to move, due to work, to a small town (Bentonville, Arkansas). Being a big city guy myself I know it will be a little bit of an adjustment for me... ok, ok, there is a mid size city 43 Kms south, and a big city 200 Kms west from my future small town, so I guess the change wont be so traumatic. Besides, I think I can use the slow pace of a small town and enjoy life a little more  ...
My question is, would it be hard to adjust to a small town for a big city RW, or like me, it depends?
Thanks in advance for your comments.
Poka!

Ramon

It depends