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Author Topic: Starting Over in 2018  (Read 28047 times)

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Offline JayH

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #25 on: October 24, 2018, 12:46:37 AM »
 The idea about "village" girls is outdated in reality imo .
Here is link to Olya talking about the topic

SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Online krimster2

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #26 on: October 24, 2018, 04:17:29 AM »
an old grizzled prospector was once asked, "where's all the gold"
he replied, "wherever you find it"

Offline BoozeBaron

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Re: Starting Over in 2019
« Reply #27 on: November 13, 2019, 12:27:08 PM »
The idea about "village" girls is outdated in reality imo .
Here is link to Olya talking about the topic



Thanks for this Jay and Olya - Having been to the far west and east (mountain and village towns) and also spending time in Kiev, I wholeheartedly agree with her summary of village gals leaving home for the larger cities both for schooling and/or for better work opportunities - So thanks to you both for that additional information and for helping remind me that people of all sorts are 'everywhere' ... Yet, there are attributes of a 'village gal' that I do seek... and rather not be hanging out in some Ritzy flash club to find her... I'm all about family and tradition and whilst they may be in Kiev or Odessa etc - finding them 'gold nuggets' is proving to be more of a challenge these days --- and feel this 'industry" (please don't take that word wrong - I'm struggling to find the right term to use to finding the aforementioned family/traditional gal) but back on point, based on my recent searches, it seems to me all this international romance stuff is teetering on dying, if not already dead...?

Since I have this tendency to ramble on at times with no end in sight - and disappear for months on end... I don't wanna waste anyone's time - However, as someone who was in Kiev when the %^&*$ hit the fan back in 2014, I'm now 5 years later watching this congressional investigation to oust Trump (which I have zero say in one way or the other - just here to discuss the best way to reboot my search - or if in 2019/2020 if it's even worth doing anymore?) ... But I didn't know the US contributed so much to Ukraine in their efforts to hold off the Russian eastern push... and having been in Donetsk to meet a gal - to hear now the 'front line' is 15-20 miles away... in Donbass, rattles me.... But on the other hand, it sounds like thus new President elected has turned over all the old corrupt rules/laws (best possible) and is trying to really make a go of it in Ukraine to get into the EU and break away from the old Soviet Union chains... The day they get Crimea back, I guess that'll tell us if he's for real or not - but hopes seem high there for once...

Anyway - I wrote this OP just over a year ago - and sadly I've been in Texas undergoing adrenal cancer treatment that was inadvertently found during a post-op follow up scan after my 4th back surgery (man, I'm SO glad now I didn't get hitched back in 2013 as I'd hoped - for my world has crumbled since then - and there's doubt a new foreign marriage would have survived the hell I've been thru these past 5 years now)... but my point is; I'm getting back on my feet now - and moving back 'home' to Colorado as the TX heat is killing me... and am trying to decide if I want to spend Xmas overseas or not? I def need a change of scenery - but fear having been laid up the past 5 years, well, those were my final 5 years to go chasing someone seriously...  I'm now 5 years older and that's 5 years more than any reasonable gal would desire... So I can't blame them... Plus American women who were always my fallback (if things weren't going well overseas, I'd just starting dating AW) - but am finding the older they get/are - the more bitter or jaded they are too... I dunno... There's allot of things I need to sort out in my head - so was just gonna rent a flat in Kiev or Odessa for 30 days and spend xmas and NYE there (so could use a referral there please?)  and just see what happens? But go back to square 1 ... I'm starting from scratch - and the rules have def changed - additionally, it's not 2004 when I took my 1st trip to Ukraine was... ALLOT has happened and change since then and guess I'm just looking to see what others' are doing these days - or are the waters all fished out? Is it even worth going over to anymore? and as I always ask - I try to network with trustworthy ppl over there that will have your back... The "Agency" my last gal used in 2013 still has her pic posted despite her being married now (5 months after we split - that says it all I think) - so don't wanna go thru all the games and traps and hoops like before (don't misunderstand - I always have a back up plan - i always check things out in advance as much as one can from 4000 miles away)... So despite being laid up for the past 60 months, I was just given clearance to travel - and it's a helluva fist trip to undertake (it's either this or go sit on some beach in Cancun) but watching all this today kinda got my blood pumping to get back over there... and am giving it some serious consideration... But need a starting point? so sorry to ask for the 100th time - but it does seem to change daily now... I'm open to suggestions!

Cheers -

BB
I'm American born, but work in London, Prague, and NZ... Currently back in the USA

Offline msmob

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #28 on: November 13, 2019, 12:42:38 PM »
Glad you are the road to recovery - but think that even though you are adverse to heat - do you need ( possibly) freezing cold and thoroughly wrapped up ladies ;) ?

Why not  try out dating sites / apps and see what happens..




Offline BillyB

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Re: Starting Over in 2019
« Reply #29 on: November 13, 2019, 02:09:05 PM »
But need a starting point? so sorry to ask for the 100th time - but it does seem to change daily now... I'm open to suggestions!


Use a variety of sites. If you get too much attention, the site isn't any good.
Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #30 on: November 13, 2019, 02:53:08 PM »
How old are you BB?

Be realistic about what you offer a younger woman. If you are over 60 can you support a woman in her 30s with a child? How attractive a girl are you looking for and how attractive are you? Remember age takes a toll on all of us.

I think Fdating is a good site for you to start with, it's a free site so no subscription axe to grind from the owners of the site. Avoid scammers as per usual, anyone trying to get you over to a PPL site or asking for money. On Fdate you will tend to find the girls come up occasionally but not too frequently like you've just become a pop star, good luck! :)
« Last Edit: November 13, 2019, 07:47:33 PM by Trenchcoat »
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline JayH

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #31 on: November 13, 2019, 10:18:25 PM »
BB --I was reading back over thread and your comments --  and had a thought--    some years ago ( quite a few in fact!)     an expensive black NZ registered car finished up in a canal on the Gold Coast - know anything about that? :)
SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Offline msmob

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #32 on: November 14, 2019, 01:38:26 AM »
How old are you BB?

Be realistic about what you offer a younger woman. If you are over 60 can you support a woman in her 30s with a child? How attractive a girl are you looking for and how attractive are you? Remember age takes a toll on all of us.

I think Fdating is a good site for you to start with, it's a free site so no subscription axe to grind from the owners of the site. Avoid scammers as per usual, anyone trying to get you over to a PPL site or asking for money. On Fdate you will tend to find the girls come up occasionally but not too frequently like you've just become a pop star, good luck! :)


OMG

Trench 'the expert' on dating FSU W is offering 'advice', again !)

Remind us where is your thread on your life with your wife / girlfriend ?

Hint: bear this in mind when reading Trench posts)))








Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #33 on: November 14, 2019, 02:01:24 AM »

OMG

Trench 'the expert' on dating FSU W is offering 'advice', again !)

Remind us where is your thread on your life with your wife / girlfriend ?

Hint: bear this in mind when reading Trench posts)))

Success at this game can be random Mobe, guys who are cluless and lack resources can come good on dumb luck. Experience in the field is a different matter and also is learning and being self aware.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline msmob

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #34 on: November 14, 2019, 02:23:12 AM »
I think you may have been watching too many old Kung Fu (David Carradine) episodes  , Grasshopper...

Your 'theories' have been working out SO well, for you))
« Last Edit: November 14, 2019, 10:29:39 AM by msmob »

Online krimster2

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #35 on: November 14, 2019, 08:35:22 AM »
success is NEVER random...
it’s “SKILLZ” that have to be LEARNED...

most people don’t have the ability to see...
the flow of information that exists all around them...
and never learn how to “read the signs”
that exist EVERYWHERE...
that tells you where the “path” is...

I learned from nature...
and that has given me a natural ability...
to know the art of taming the wild Russian tigress
transforming her into a totally domesticated animal that purrs softly and gently licks me to show her affection, my adorable pet...

what is knowledge based on?
the stones of experience joined together with the mortar of wisdom...
Trench, this mason, says this to you...
If you are not succeeding in Ukraine, then what does that tell you?
Do you know WHY you’re not succeeding?
if you do know why, what have you done to change the situation?
otherwise...
your trips to Ukraine are going to be for entertainment purposes only me bruv...


Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #36 on: November 14, 2019, 12:58:51 PM »
Trench, this mason, says this to you...
If you are not succeeding in Ukraine, then what does that tell you?
Do you know WHY you’re not succeeding?
if you do know why, what have you done to change the situation?
otherwise...
your trips to Ukraine are going to be for entertainment purposes only me bruv...

I think the reasons are various.

I'm an everyday looking guy, I will appeal to some women looks wise and not to others. Out of every 10 women I may only appeal between 2-4 of them looks wise. Of those I will only probably be lucky to have chemistry with one of them. Odds may be that 1-2 ish girls in every 20 I might have chemistry with and they might find me somewhat attractive.

Then there is whether we have the same interests in common, they don't have to be the same but somewhat complementary is usually needed I guess.

After that there is the woman's outlook and my outlook of what we are both looking for. If we are hot enough on each other then it may not be the biggest issue.


I think in the past some girls were not near the target. They were either into Theatre/Opera/Orchestra where I am not really or the weren't the right type of girl, smoked, party girl. I may have not said the right sort of thing to one or two of them, or more. I do feel now though that I have learnt from this and how to go about it better and the type of girl to go for more.

In some ways the second girl I was with was not as far off the mark as the others but I didn't play it right and she was materialistic. Maybe a few years on as I think I will be in a lot better position financially it wouldn't have mattered as much but then it did.

The girl I met in Minsk told me some areas I needed to improve on. Basically working out (not that I was particularly fat), posture and I think she seemed to be subtly suggesting that wearing glasses was not good either. The general gist seemed to be that I was not coming over right. I don't think I would have been right for her anyway as there was no chemistry and she was into Theatre but it's just what she saw.

I've sorted the glasses issue, all well there so no longer a problem and I like the result of not having to wear them no longer. I've been hitting the gym and think I am now making progress, not there yet but really seem to finally be getting into it after a year at it. I'm guessing this will also help with posture, I've also got a posture corrector gadget of Amazon but haven't gotten around to using it as yet.

In addition I've been trying to learn Russian and made a little bit of progress and been looking into broadening out my hobbies a little :)
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline HoundDaddyLee

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #37 on: November 14, 2019, 01:16:32 PM »
I think the reasons are various.

I'm an everyday looking guy, I will appeal to some women looks wise and not to others. Out of every 10 women I may only appeal between 2-4 of them looks wise. Of those I will only probably be lucky to have chemistry with one of them. Odds may be that 1-2 ish girls in every 20 I might have chemistry with and they might find me somewhat attractive.

Then there is whether we have the same interests in common, they don't have to be the same but somewhat complementary is usually needed I guess.

After that there is the woman's outlook and my outlook of what we are both looking for. If we are hot enough on each other then it may not be the biggest issue.


I think in the past some girls were not near the target. They were either into Theatre/Opera/Orchestra where I am not really or the weren't the right type of girl, smoked, party girl. I may have not said the right sort of thing to one or two of them, or more. I do feel now though that I have learnt from this and how to go about it better and the type of girl to go for more.

In some ways the second girl I was with was not as far off the mark as the others but I didn't play it right and she was materialistic. Maybe a few years on as I think I will be in a lot better position financially it wouldn't have mattered as much but then it did.

The girl I met in Minsk told me some areas I needed to improve on. Basically working out (not that I was particularly fat), posture and I think she seemed to be subtly suggesting that wearing glasses was not good either. The general gist seemed to be that I was not coming over right. I don't think I would have been right for her anyway as there was no chemistry and she was into Theatre but it's just what she saw.

I've sorted the glasses issue, all well there so no longer a problem and I like the result of not having to wear them no longer. I've been hitting the gym and think I am now making progress, not there yet but really seem to finally be getting into it after a year at it. I'm guessing this will also help with posture, I've also got a posture corrector gadget of Amazon but haven't gotten around to using it as yet.

In addition I've been trying to learn Russian and made a little bit of progress and been looking into broadening out my hobbies a little :)


Trench,


You can work out until you are cut, you can have LASIK to rid yourself of the glasses. You will still fail. Your problems are not your looks, it is your attitude. You thing women are a commodity. They are human beings, not objects. Fix your personality (at your age you probably can't, but at least try). You have refused to build a relationship over Skype because of the time required. What do you do in the evening? You make a crap salary and refuse to fix that because you would get hit with more taxes. If you spend weeks/months building a relationship over Skype you will be in a better place when you visit in person.


Your problems are inside you. You giving advice is frightening. You keep getting told this by everyone, over and over again.  :cluebat:


HDL

Offline msmob

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #38 on: November 14, 2019, 01:17:43 PM »
Trench,

you are learning nothing - other than listening to bollox and 'swallowing' it ..

I met a lass who told me I'd stand a chance ( with her ) if I worked out more ..

She is still single - perhaps she is looking for her perfect guy ..

Penny dropping ?

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #39 on: November 14, 2019, 01:43:40 PM »
Trench,

you are learning nothing - other than listening to bollox and 'swallowing' it ..

I met a lass who told me I'd stand a chance ( with her ) if I worked out more ..

She is still single - perhaps she is looking for her perfect guy ..

Penny dropping ?

I know some women have unrealistic expectations of what guy they can get and some guys may have unrealistic expectations of what girl they can get. People at the end of the day want what they want and some wouldn't be satisfied if they don't get the full deal so won't settle.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #40 on: November 14, 2019, 01:53:31 PM »

Trench,


You can work out until you are cut, you can have LASIK to rid yourself of the glasses. You will still fail. Your problems are not your looks, it is your attitude. You thing women are a commodity. They are human beings, not objects. Fix your personality (at your age you probably can't, but at least try). You have refused to build a relationship over Skype because of the time required. What do you do in the evening? You make a crap salary and refuse to fix that because you would get hit with more taxes. If you spend weeks/months building a relationship over Skype you will be in a better place when you visit in person.


Your problems are inside you. You giving advice is frightening. You keep getting told this by everyone, over and over again.  :cluebat:


HDL

I'm not saying you are totally wrong in your synopsis of me HDL. However, women no don't do the same/similar, I think it's somewhat natural. The girl in Minsk could be said to want a certain commodity in her man, probably a masculine looking fitness freak. Some women will see me/how I was as not near enough the mark, from the way I look they may have thought I was a little weak looking for a man and hence not up to the job. I know for certain some girls don't like guys who wear glasses.

If I can appeal to more women by shaving off stuff like that and get to a more broader appeal then it's not a bad thing. I tend to treat women decently on meeting not like a commodity. It's just a case of trying to get to know the right girl more.

Do you think guys like Robbie Williams ever had problems with the way he looks, I've heard that when he was young and happening in the 90's most women wanted to get it on with him!

ps. It was LASEK laser surgery I had done ;)
« Last Edit: November 14, 2019, 01:58:05 PM by Trenchcoat »
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline ML

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #41 on: November 14, 2019, 03:17:37 PM »
The idea about "village" girls is outdated in reality imo .


Wife watched this video with me.
The gal kept repeating . . . Ukrainians are not racist.

Wife said:  Yes they are !!
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline HoundDaddyLee

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #42 on: November 14, 2019, 04:16:45 PM »
I'm not saying you are totally wrong in your synopsis of me HDL. However, women no don't do the same/similar, I think it's somewhat natural. The girl in Minsk could be said to want a certain commodity in her man, probably a masculine looking fitness freak. Some women will see me/how I was as not near enough the mark, from the way I look they may have thought I was a little weak looking for a man and hence not up to the job. I know for certain some girls don't like guys who wear glasses.

If I can appeal to more women by shaving off stuff like that and get to a more broader appeal then it's not a bad thing. I tend to treat women decently on meeting not like a commodity. It's just a case of trying to get to know the right girl more.

Do you think guys like Robbie Williams ever had problems with the way he looks, I've heard that when he was young and happening in the 90's most women wanted to get it on with him!

ps. It was LASEK laser surgery I had done ;)


Don't know who Robbie Williams is...
I imagine a celebrity, so of course he attracted women. If this is the type of woman you want, then keep working out, but you will need to make more change than you make now. If you want a good, loving woman, then work on yourself. That woman won't care about the size of your wallet, your biceps or your penis. She will care about your heart and your character.


Again, you are fishing for a type of woman who will never bite into your bait. At best you will get milked until dry (and I don't mean sexually) and then dumped. But don't listen to the good advice you've gotten. Keep doing the wrong things. I seem to remember a quote that insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results. Do the math.


HDL

Offline ML

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #43 on: November 14, 2019, 04:29:45 PM »

That woman won't care about the size of your wallet, your biceps or your penis.



Don't be so sure about this.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #44 on: November 14, 2019, 04:47:03 PM »

Don't know who Robbie Williams is...
I imagine a celebrity, so of course he attracted women. If this is the type of woman you want, then keep working out, but you will need to make more change than you make now. If you want a good, loving woman, then work on yourself. That woman won't care about the size of your wallet, your biceps or your penis. She will care about your heart and your character.


Again, you are fishing for a type of woman who will never bite into your bait. At best you will get milked until dry (and I don't mean sexually) and then dumped. But don't listen to the good advice you've gotten. Keep doing the wrong things. I seem to remember a quote that insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results. Do the math.


HDL

He was part of 90's pop boy band, 'Take That'. In fairness he actually had a decent singing voice but often wasn't allowed to do much singing. That job was often taken by Gary Barlow, he wasn't as good as at singing but better at song writing. Main thing is that few women were into Gary despite being the brain behind the songs, he didn't quite cut it looks wise compared to Robbie. So Robbie had a big following of women that wanted to do him, Gary  hardly any despite being just as famous/well known.

Take That later broke up, Robbie had a sterling solo music career, Gary and the rest of the band members not so much. Gary tried a solo career but it never really went anywhere much. For a fair number of years Robbie went over and lived in LA but apparently came back to the UK as he reckoned the UK education system was much better quality and needed as his children were growing up. Robbie still does solo concerts to this day. The rest of Take That tried a reunion (minus Robbie who didn't get on with Gary) but the results were mixed and somewhat short lived.

Robbie Williams was definitely VERY big throughout the nineties in the UK, not sure about the US as UK music can often have trouble penetrating over there.

Main point is that women are just as superficial as men if not more so. If Robbie was an ugly guy few girls would be wanting to get it on with him saying, 'well he has a good voice'. Most wouldn't care and his singing career wouldn't have been anywhere near as good as it was as it is the guy ended up cleaning up and has many millions of £ now.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Online krimster2

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #45 on: November 14, 2019, 07:12:36 PM »
my last trip to Moscow three months ago cast me as an observer of the "dating scene" there...
I served as a designated driver/security guard-chaperone for my oldest daughter's crowd of freshman/sophmore college friends in Moscow...
18-19 yr olds.... the privileged children of indifferent oligarchs...

we convoyed up North from Dzerzhinksy on the main highway all the way up to Presnensky and first went to Night Flight but then we got a call that we should all head over to "Lookin Rooms"
which was pretty "jumpin" we met up with the other part of our group and I got tables for us and me and the other guard/chaperone sat drinking Perrier while our charges socialized with each other ..
I spent the night watching over my daughter and her friends while occasionally deflecting a drug dealer or hooligan...
it would not be good for me to have to explain to my daughter's boyfriend's parents why he got beat up in a fight or high on X on "my watch"...
so I gotta keep things under control...
I spot the "professionals" we make eye contact but I shake my head NO....

a lot of groups of young women in their early 20s standing in line, but facecontrol knows some of the people in our group and just waves us in...

so we become part of "the social" that's going on that morphs into dancing when a local Moscva band appears on stage to a lot of clapping and cheering...
the women are all dancing AMAZINGLY well, only a couple of guys can dance at that level...

then I see one of my daughter's friends head out with a "chorny plash" X dealer and I had to intercept her before she blindly went ahead and took one of the many X tabs she had just purchased...
then when another of her friends is throwing up in the bathroom I have to go in and get him cleaned up and out of there...
several times I had to steer rogue males away from the women in our group before boyfriends got involved (and potentially injured!)

afterwards, when taking everyone home, met several cougar moms, and there was one my daughter definitely steered me away from....
an interesting evening...
a LOTTA bling, my daughter is hitting me up for a 3.0 caret canary yellow stone to match her friend's as her Christmas present (I'll get a hand drawn Christmas card in return, so it's totally EVEN!)

the club scene in Moscva remends me quite a bit of the club scene back in the "Bay Area" in the mid-80s...
the same "techno club" ambiance...
but with more Russian rap and techno music and 100 times more beautiful single women!!!
a lot of the women were getting frustrated that there were no guys to dance with...
I didn't want to dance, because I didn't want to get all sweaty wearing a Louis Vuitton jacket and silk shirt...
« Last Edit: November 14, 2019, 07:41:54 PM by krimster2 »

Offline Davo

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #46 on: November 14, 2019, 10:05:25 PM »

Trench,


You can work out until you are cut, you can have LASIK to rid yourself of the glasses. You will still fail. Your problems are not your looks, it is your attitude. You thing women are a commodity. They are human beings, not objects. Fix your personality (at your age you probably can't, but at least try). You have refused to build a relationship over Skype because of the time required. What do you do in the evening? You make a crap salary and refuse to fix that because you would get hit with more taxes. If you spend weeks/months building a relationship over Skype you will be in a better place when you visit in person.


Your problems are inside you. You giving advice is frightening. You keep getting told this by everyone, over and over again.  :cluebat:


HDL


Trench, HDL has some good points and one of your biggest issues is your income. Even if you find the perfect woman for you she’s going to take one look at your income, do the figures and realise she’s better off staying put. Don’t think for one minute she won’t. K did and also S with her English guy, who earns £15,000 more than you. It wasn’t enough to support S and her son, while she brought her qualifications up to scratch to bring the family income up to an acceptable level. You want a woman who doesn’t work, a baby straight away that will cost a lot more than S’s older son.

I haven’t been here much lately, because when I returned from Russia, I realised I  was underfunded and wasn’t going to be successful even though I earned twice your income. I’ve been pulling big hours growing my business, which I do part time after working for another company. In 5 months I’ve doubled my income to a projected £70,000+ this financial year.

During this time K confided in my female friend that it was expensive to bring her to Australia. She knew my basic income from my first job, it was part of her failed tourist visa application, so I opened up my books and was able to show her I was earning 90k Aud at that stage, this reassured her she wasn’t getting herself into bad financial situation. It’s a pity her Ex started talking about going court if she tries to take her daughter out of the country and his family putting pressure on her to pull the pin, because i’d basically ticked all the boxes. It was probably for the best though, as this period showed some flaws in our communication.

I had the same thought as you.... find a woman and then make more money from my side business. That isn’t practical firstly because you will be time poor when she first arrives in your country and needs your support, not an absent husband who’s working to keep both of your heads above water.

Secondly as I said above, the next rung on the ladder, after you meet a suitable woman is showing her what type of life she’s going to live in your country. With some guys it’s more than obvious that they are financially comfortable, given their lifestyle (Krim for example).  In your case it not obvious and she’ll be asking direct questions regarding finances. Your word that you can make more money isn’t going to cut it for someone making the biggest and riskiest decision of their life. She’s going to want to see cold hard evidence (figures), just like K did.

The time you spend here, in the gym, and dreaming up plans to succeed could be far better utilised fixing your biggest problem atm, before you continue....IMO
« Last Edit: November 15, 2019, 12:28:06 AM by Davo »

Offline Boethius

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #47 on: November 14, 2019, 11:41:40 PM »
Do you think guys like Robbie Williams ever had problems with the way he looks, I've heard that when he was young and happening in the 90's most women wanted to get it on with him!

Robbie Williams was famous and worth more than £100 million (now over £250 million). He had women chasing him when he was drug addled. This is a poor example which bears no relation to your reality. It’s a stupid example. If you were rich and famous you wouldn’t have problems finding women interested in you either.

This post was composed without the aid of google.
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline jone

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #48 on: November 15, 2019, 12:14:52 AM »
Davo,

What's your take on K's daughter and the ex-husband/father?   Is the father involved in her life?  Or is he making noise because he wants to see a payoff? 
Kissing girls is a goodness.  It beats the hell out of card games.  - Robert Heinlein

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Starting Over in 2018
« Reply #49 on: November 15, 2019, 12:23:02 AM »

Trench, HDL has some good points and one of your biggest issues is your income. Even if you find the perfect woman for you she’s going to take one look at your income, do the figures and realise she’s better off staying put. Don’t think for one minute she won’t. K did and also S with her English guy, who earns $15,000 more than you. It wasn’t enough to support S and her son, while she brought her qualifications up to scratch to bring the family income up to an acceptable level.

I haven’t been here much lately, because when I returned from Russia, I realised I  was underfunded and wasn’t going to be successful even though I earned twice your income. I’ve been pulling big hours growing my business, which I do part time after working for another company. In 5 months I’ve doubled my income to a projected $70,000+ pounds this financial year. During this time K confided in my female friend that it was expensive to bring her to Australia, so I opened up my books and was able to show her I was earning 90k Aud at that stage, this reassured her she wasn’t getting herself into bad financial situation.

I had the same thought as you.... find a woman and then make more money from my side business. That isn’t practical firstly because you will be time poor when she first arrives in your country and needs your support, not an absent husband who’s working to keep both of your heads above water.

Secondly as I said above, the next rung on the ladder, after you meet a suitable woman is showing her what type of life she’s going to live in your country. With some guys it’s more than obvious that they are financially comfortable, given their lifestyle (Krim for example).  In your case it not obvious and she’ll be asking direct questions regarding finances. Your word that you can make more money isn’t going to cut it for someone making the biggest and riskiest decision of their life. She’s going to want to see cold hard evidence (figures), just like K did.

The time you spend here, in the gym, and dreaming up plans to succeed could be far better utilised fixing your biggest problem atm, before you continue....IMO

What??? The ungrateful little cow Davo, she should be damn grateful that you are taking her to paradise in the west not getting fussy with it, lol ;D

Well there are different variables, if there is already any kids she has then that can up costs significantly. If you have a mortgage that can also up costs. The longer distance compared to the UK is also not helpful. Then there are the greater costs that the State covers in the UK which they don't in Aus, Education, Healthcare, etc.

I still think you are both getting carried away and over-estimating the costs. A bit like in the UK when someone retires and think the State pension won't be enough and then goes to stupid lengths from the fear that they might be hard up. It's the fear rather than reality that is driving it.

Still I get your point, it can all unravel there if the girl is not convinced that everything will be rock solid and sound. Girls will vary but this is likely to be a potential issue that could de-rail things.

There really isn't anything I can do on that at the moment. The UK isn't like Aus where you can start a business and be relatively assured of money if you put the hours in. The UK has a lot higher population per sq meter, that equates to a lot of competition in most things one might try. Building up wealth and income is possible but it tends to be a slower and harder path.

I appreciate what you're trying to say, when I was in Kiev this summer I realized that I was not set up enough on the personal side of my life, contacts to get stuff done, social activities that I am a part off, etc. That if a FSW joined me here I may have little to help entertain her.

The financial situation is potentially another aspect where I would have to have a hard look at it and ask myself if I am properly set up enough for a woman to join me. I assess my options along the way so nothing is hard and fast.

For me I think it will be a case of building up my wealth and income as I look for a FSW. There is relatively little loss of income from me looking while bringing in income. I'm guessing from Aus it's a case of taking a long while of for journeying and taking time out to make the trip worthwhile of the travelling time and cost. Some businesses I know can due if left a while. Admittedly I'm not as comfortably off as I would like to be, not talking millionaire at all which a six figure income at all here just able to do stuff without thinking about money cost that much.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm happy to improve as I go but take a casual approach to the FSU dating venture. I think that I would need to find a girl who is quite laid back about it and willing to give it a go without getting too hung up on having a well off lifestyle.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

 

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