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Author Topic: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?  (Read 15831 times)

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Offline Bee Farmer

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #75 on: March 31, 2019, 01:24:11 PM »
I think you’re failing to see the obvious, why is it any of your business how two grown adults live their lives? If they are happy what right on you have to impose your warped sense of morality on them?

You’re a stranger on the internet, you don’t know them and it’s not your place to say anything about their relationship..... don’t you agree???

No, I don't agree with you.

As long as people act in ways that are peaceful, voluntary, and honest, I could care less with what they do.  I may not agree with it, but if they want to be foolish, that is their choice.

If I see someone breaking into my neighbor's house, or assaulting my neighbor, are you saying that I should say nothing because it does not affect me?

When someone makes a vow to stay married until death, no matter what, and they don't keep their word, everyone has a moral obligation to stand up and say something, because it does affect everyone else.

The foundation of a civil society is trust.  Without trust, society falls apart.

But what you are describing creates a victim - your ex.  Your new relationship is based upon fraud, as you still have prior unmet obligations.

Next you will say that this is the internet, and no one should be allowed to say anything you disagree with.  What a snowflake.

And just out of curiosity, how am I imposing my own warped sense of morality on others by pointing out marriage and divorce statistics, and by not being willing to date a woman who is divorced or has kids?
No one is forcing you to read my posts, much less forcing you to live by the standards I live my own life by.

Offline Davo

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #76 on: March 31, 2019, 01:27:36 PM »
Mate, don’t you get it..... most of us are divorced or have survived a long term failed relationship. We don’t want to hear your sh*t!!!

Maybe if it come from someone who had a good track record with women and was in a successful long term marriage, we could respect their point of view, but not someone who has never lived with a woman, let alone married one and to top it off most of us would avoid you like the plague in real life, due to your left field  religious views.

You would have a better reception with a mega phone and handing out fliers the other religious nutters on the street.....

Before you say it, I do respect people of faith. Thursday I attended church with a wonderful divorced woman and watched her say a prayer for a friend who passed away two years to the day. It was a beautiful thing to witness from a woman who in your eyes can’t be trusted.

Your making a fool of yourself and showing just how inexperienced you are when it comes to relationships. Wtf are you even doing on this site, to begin with???

« Last Edit: March 31, 2019, 01:33:04 PM by AnonMod »

Offline Davo

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #77 on: March 31, 2019, 01:34:04 PM »
I read the first few word of your reply to
me and realised it was just going to be the same BS.....

Where I come from we affectionately a Mate a C%*t and a C%*t a Mate ...... Mate!!! 👍

Offline AnonMod

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #78 on: March 31, 2019, 01:34:19 PM »
Mate, don’t you get it..... most of us are divorced or have survived a long term failed relationship. We don’t want to hear your sh*t!!!

If you don't want to read what BeeFarmer posts, there is a simple solution.  Don't read it. 
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Offline Davo

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #79 on: March 31, 2019, 01:40:50 PM »
If you don't want to read what BeeFarmer posts, there is a simple solution.  Don't read it.

Probably the most sensible thing I’ve been told on this thread.... better still I’ll ork out how to use the block function.... thanks 😊

Offline AnonMod

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #80 on: March 31, 2019, 01:47:09 PM »
Go to "Profile" on the top ribbon.  Click on "Summary".  Then hover your mouse over "Modify Profile".  You will see a number of options, including "Buddies/Ignore List".  Hover over that to get an "Edit" feature.  You can then add names to your "Edit Ignore" list.  Ensure the user name is exact, or that member will not appear on your "ignore" list.
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Offline Bee Farmer

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #81 on: March 31, 2019, 02:03:15 PM »
Mate, don’t you get it..... most of us are divorced or have survived a long term failed relationship. We don’t want to hear your shit!!!

No, you don't get it.

This site is supposed to be about marriage.  It is entirely appropriate to point out things which help lead to a successful marriage, and things to avoid which lead to a failure of the marriage.

If you're divorced, and living your life in a way that makes divorce a high probability for a future relationship, then maybe marriage isn't for you.

You don't want to hear what I say?  Tough.  It doesn't change the message if you shoot the messenger.
You see, I understand that the anger you have for yourself, (for making bad decisions) you are transferring to me.  And you are transferring your anger towards religion at me.

You want to believe that the situation was out of your control, and you were powerless to do anything to change things.  You want to believe that no one else could have handled things any better than you did.  Because to admit that you were responsible, and to take full responsibility for everything that happened...that's a tough pill to swallow.  (Considering your unresolved issues, I would suggest that you don't even consider a relationship with anyone else until you get yourself straightened out first.)

Marriage affects other people, not just you.  Don't destroy others lives just because you want to be selfish and think only of yourself and what you want.

Quote
Maybe if it come from someone who had a good track record with women and was in a successful long term marriage, we could respect their point of view, but not someone who has never lived with a woman, let alone married one and to top it off most of us would avoid you like the plague in real life, due to your left field  religious views.

I had a 4.5 year relationship when I was younger.  Despite my many flaws, that woman still tells other people that I am the best guy she has ever known, and quietly admits the relationship falling apart was 100% her fault.  It's not uncommon for women to pursue me.  Most women I know have a very high opinion of me.

Birds of a feather do flock together.  But I suspect some folks on here might not hang out with me because I don't drink alcohol, and I'm not divorced, so I can't commiserate with them.  Folks that know me know I don't go to church, I have long hair, and even been known to say a few choice words from time to time.  You would be hard pressed to find people who regard me as religious.

Quote
Your making a fool of yourself and showing just how inexperienced you are when it comes to relationships.

And just how am I making a fool of myself?

I would argue that divorced people trying to give relationship advice make a fool of themselves.  If they wrote a book, the proper title would be something like, "How to fail at relationships for Dummies."

Quote
Wtf are you even doing on this site, to begin with???

I would like to find someone to spend the rest of my life with.
Locally, there are a limited number of women who have never been married, have no kids, and are physically fit in my age range.  These are all deal breakers for me.  I'm willing to entertain the possibility of finding a girl from the FSU who meets my list of criteria.  I've been to Ukraine before, and I think it is fairly likely I will visit Ukraine again at some point.

Offline Boethius

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #82 on: March 31, 2019, 02:07:21 PM »
I don't think Ukraine is the place for you, Bee.


This post was composed without the aid of google.
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline msmob

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #83 on: March 31, 2019, 02:47:45 PM »
Sadly, Anon mod's kind advice only works until someone quotes BF ...((

Then - even if on ignore - one sees the scribes ..

BF might suggest this is how it should be ( divine intervention !? )

I sincerely, he doesn't end up married and his partner divorces him - against his wishes ...   Those of us still around can point out ." you can't be trusted" ....

« Last Edit: March 31, 2019, 03:32:56 PM by msmob »

Offline tfcrew

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #84 on: March 31, 2019, 03:29:24 PM »
  I don't go to church.
  Not absolutely necessary for salvation.
Quote

Would you lend money to someone who never pays people back, or who has filed bankruptcy?  You're asking for trouble if you do.
It's no difference getting involved with someone who is divorced.
Equals among the most absurd statements I have ever read in the 11 years I've been on this forum.
No links were provided in that ludicrous opening post...you got called on it...and then you get mad.
 
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Offline fathertime

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #85 on: March 31, 2019, 04:33:38 PM »
Monogamy is pretty much a human universal.
I'm not sure why you think this is the case.  Regardless of the penis bone argument, monogamy is not a human universal. 



People who do not take marriage seriously end up suffering bad consequences, such as divorce, and kids being raised in single parent homes (those kids do not do as well), or even worse, kids being raised in homes with someone other than a natural parent, such as step-parents or mom/dad's boyfriend/girlfriend. (8 times the child abuse rates of kids with both biological parents.)

The evidence is quite clear that people who do not take marriage seriously suffer horrible consequences.
You consider divorce a bad consequence?  Many people consider it to be salvation when compared to a poor marriage.   Many children are absolutely fine with parents divorcing, and in many cases it is a better situation.   
The evidence is NOT 'quite clear' that people who aren't as serious about marriage as others suffer horrible consequences.  One of the worst consequences I think of is being stuck in a very bad marriage and wanted out but being forced to stay. 



 
Are they fulfilling their obligations, even if it is a horrible marriage?  If so, then they are honorable.  That's what honorable means.  That's the definition.

You're speculating.

People who don't have guts are cowards, and are the ones who pull out.  People with guts will keep trying to work through problems.

Then maybe you are blindly ignorant of what being honorable means?  If you don't keep your promises and obligations, then you have dishonored yourself.
Disagree, there can easily be a point where being divorced is better for all parties.  Many people stay in the marriage not out of honor/courage but out of fear.  So in those cases they are left as withering and unhappy men. With neither honor, happiness, or peace/love. 


Perhaps they are a 'loser,' but they still have the potential to be a winner.
Someone who is divorced is a bigger loser, and a failure.  Their only hope of not being a failure is to reconcile with their ex.

I'm going to have to disagree with your harsh criticism of divorced individuals. 
Individuals that are single at 40 are losers, and do not even have the potential to be winners.  They have failed and there is no redemption possible.  They should not travel to the FSU, South America Asia, or Africa.  They should be exiled to Antarctica and fed to whales for recycling purposes. 

Fathertime! 
I just happened to be browsing about the internet....

Offline JayH

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #86 on: March 31, 2019, 05:00:06 PM »
I read the first few word of your reply to
me and realised it was just going to be the same BS.....

Where I come from we affectionately a Mate a C%*t and a C%*t a Mate ...... Mate!!! 👍

What he said !! :clapping: :clapping:
SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Offline JayH

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #87 on: March 31, 2019, 05:03:05 PM »
I don't think Ukraine is the place for you, Bee.



Yeah-- somewhere closer to home !
I saw some yokel  saying that girls should not be allowed to wear tights   as her 4 son's  would be out of control ! Sounds like Bee Fu..ker territory to me !
« Last Edit: March 31, 2019, 05:12:09 PM by JayH »
SLAVA UKRAYINI  ! HEROYAM SLAVA!!!!
Слава Украине! Слава героям слава!Слава Україні! Слава героям!
 translated as: Glory to Ukraine! Glory to the heroes!!!  is a Ukrainian greeting slogan being used now all over Ukraine to signify support for a free independent Ukraine

Online krimster2

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #88 on: March 31, 2019, 05:05:54 PM »
when beefarmer has "sexual problems"
he will end up with a solution in hand


Offline Boethius

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #89 on: March 31, 2019, 05:46:41 PM »
Yeah-- somewhere closer to home !
I saw some yokel  saying that girls should not be allowed to wear tights   as her 4 son's  would be out of control ! Sounds like Bee Fu..ker territory to me !


In no way did I mean my comment as a knock on Bee Farmer.  I just meant that he won't find what he seeks in Ukraine.  He is far more likely to find it in the US.


This post was composed without the aid of google.
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline tfcrew

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #90 on: March 31, 2019, 07:42:33 PM »
 
  I just meant that he won't find what he seeks in Ukraine.  He is far more likely to find it in the US.
   Being a realist..I would agree with the first line. However regarding the second...isn't likely either.
~There is no one more blind than those who refuse to see and none more deaf as those who will not listen~
~Think about the intelligence of the average person and then realize that half of the people are even more stupid than that~

Offline tfcrew

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #91 on: March 31, 2019, 07:49:56 PM »
You may have heard the expression that marriage is a 50-50 proposition. Don't believe it. If both are not willing to give give their 100% all..it may be doomed to failure.
~There is no one more blind than those who refuse to see and none more deaf as those who will not listen~
~Think about the intelligence of the average person and then realize that half of the people are even more stupid than that~

Offline rwd123

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #92 on: March 31, 2019, 10:16:36 PM »
I don't think Ukraine is the place for you, Bee.
LOL. Same goes for Russia!

Some FSUW are monogomous but there are many that are not, even if they are married. A friend living in Russia describes Russian women as wild; he has three girlfriends, one who is married and been having affairs for the last seven years. Ukraine is not much different. If you know enough people you'll quickly understand how widespread infidelity and sexual promiscuity is in these countries.

This is important to understand, because you may meet a woman you think is a honey bee who is actually busy pollinating other plants.

BF - you still have zero trips? Get out in the real world. I've spent the past three weeks in Ukraine/Russia, and not to visit women. It's always interesting to get out of your comfort zone and expand your horizons. By a whim I decided to go to Saint Petersburg. I really had no interest in the city but went because it was raining in Sochi. I was pleasantly surprised and now have a direct understanding why people say the city is so beautiful. I never planned to go there but think I'll go back on my next trip.

Offline msmob

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Re: Are you Marriage Material, or Divorce Material?
« Reply #93 on: April 01, 2019, 01:07:33 AM »
Sochi has had a crap winter...  SC hit the beach there for the first time yesterday..((

 

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