Help!!!! i'm chatting with women in Ukrain.

[Pet82]

Hi there I'm Peter. To start out, I'm pretty new to this whole international dating scene. I've registered myself a dating site and started chatting with several women in Ukraine. Also I've been reading some stuff on this site, some of which caused me some concern.

So far talking to Ukrainian women has been, a somewhat confusing experience. I've been dealing with a massive amount of scammers. The conversations I've had are far less playful then I've had on local dating sites. Conversations turn into ‘job interviews’ pretty quick. Are Ukrainian women a lot more to the point? Is this normal?

Now there is this woman I'm chatting with. She's 32 (I'm 35). has a Master's degree, a good job in Kiev, Is beautiful, kind, funny, likes sports. She seems real (she Passes the scam card test on this site). And she's looking for a longterm relationship with someone outside of Ukraine. I short, a perfect woman. I mean how much more could i wish for? So far so good.

I have a concern:
She's been to the Netherlands, and actually visited the city I live in. Which seemed a bit weird to me because it isn't a city you go to when you're on holiday in the Netherlands but ok. The other thing she said is that she had some Dutch friends (which she found real nice). Now I'm thinking a woman of the above profile, why in the world is she looking for someone outside of Ukraine? And if she is, with somewhat of a network of friends in Holland, shouldn’t she be able to find a guy here in no time?

All-in-all the whole situation seems a bit to easy, and to good to be true. So basically I'm wondering where's the catch? Am I being lured into some kind of scam?

[Boethius]

Why is she looking?  Because she is an unmarried 32 year old woman in Ukraine.

[msmob]

Welcome Pet82

You can only be scammed if you 'allow' yourself to

1/ pay per letter - STOP - now !

or

2/ Send money to someone you never met


Establish she is 'real', chat on SKYPE( or similar ) not a dating site's 'pay for communication' system.

Good luck 

[alex330]

I have a concern:
She's been to the Netherlands, and actually visited the city I live in. Which seemed a bit weird to me because it isn't a city you go to when you're on holiday in the Netherlands but ok. The other thing she said is that she had some Dutch friends (which she found real nice).

She might have met a man in your city and gone to visit him at some point. It did not work out is all.

[msmob]

or has a friend there ? ..

[BillyB]

why in the world is she looking for someone outside of Ukraine?

Welcome to the forum Peter. Her answer could be as simple as yours, looking for love. She may also want to have her family live in a more stable environment than Ukraine provides. Or she may still be open to marrying a man in Ukraine but expanding her options.

And if she is, with somewhat of a network of friends in Holland, shouldn’t she be able to find a guy here in no time?

Maybe she wants to find the right guy and that can't be done in no time.

All-in-all the whole situation seems a bit to easy, and to good to be true. So basically I'm wondering where's the catch? Am I being lured into some kind of scam?

Some guys have lost good women because they thought it to be too good to be true and remains suspicious of the woman and treated her like a potential scammer.

Can you tell the difference between a girl who goes to church and a hooker? It's not difficult to distinguish the way a sincere woman talks and writes compared to a gold digger/prostitute. They've walked different lives so they talk and act different. If you can't tell the differences and continue to encounter lots of scammers, you are very likely to fail. Do lots of reading here and you'll increase your chances of success.

[noelscot]

Hi Pet 82,

Good luck in your search. One thing to keep in mind, that will help you, is that, yes, you should be cautious, but essentially people are good (just some are misguided) and it takes a long time and meetings in person to establish trust, which is crucial to developing a meaningful, long-term relationship.

[msmob]

I owe BillyB an apology

I accused him of deliberately making his text small ...

It seems he has this issue :

http://www.russianwomendiscussion.com/index.php?topic=17720.msg468632#msg468632

A tick has got ticked in one of his profile settings - that needs unticked..

Sandro to the rescue ?

[BillyB]

I didn't have a problem with small texts until I started using Mozilla Firefox.

[Pet82]

Ok, Great.

Thanks for all the input everybody. Perhaps i just shouldn't read to much into this, and just see where it goes from here.

You have convinced me to go buy a webcam.

Thanks!

[drsecu]

She most likely when on a trip with another guy there.  Which isn't a big deal, but she thinks it is or she things YOU will think it is.

[Boethius]

Perhaps.  It depends on her opportunities.  Many of my Ukrainian relatives are widely traveled - France, Italy, Spain, Portugal, the Netherlands, Greece, US, China, Maldives.  All those trips were done without meeting any WM. 

[Trenchcoat]

Hi Pete, well if she really does have a good job then theoretically she could have qualified for a visa (& more recent visa free). She could have also had the money to fly etc. It would seem strange if it were not a touristy city as most people particularly those that don't travel loads tend to hit those first. I wouldn't go on red alert over it but I would go to yellow. If she's telling you she's been in your locality of the beaten track and have friends in your country then I would be cautious and not because I think she is a scammer. What she says could well be true or part true but you don't know whether she already has certain intentions. You might only dis cover this by getting to know her better - it may all be perfectly innocent. However, they may well  be a lot of Ukrainian women out after immigration out of Ukraine - the country is not in the best of states; civil war in the east, economic problems, etc. Are these friends also Ukrainian, if so she may be looking to join them. If I were you I would try to gauge how intereste she is in moving to where you are and hwe reaction if you state you would vd willing to move to Ukraine. Of course you would have to make it sound like you have a source of income so would not need work there or it would sound like idiocy. So ask a lot more questions and feel your way through I would.

[Sting23]

Watch out for Trenchcoat the resident expert who overanalyzes each situation.

If she's been to the Netherlands already ask her to meet you in your city and see what she says.  If she starts talking about money for flights, hotels then be careful.

If not then go and meet her and see what happens.

[southernX]

I would be cautious and not because I think she is a scammer. What she says could well be true or part true but you don't know whether she already has certain intentions. You might only dis cover this by getting to know her better - it may all be perfectly innocent. However, they may well  be a lot of Ukrainian women out after immigration out of Ukraine - the country is not in the best of states; civil war in the east, economic problems, etc. Are these friends also Ukrainian, if so she may be looking to join them..

you may find some people wishing to move , that is an ongoing flux in any country at all times however  contrary to the above almost all our family and friends in ukraine are positive that the country is on the upward rebound and most see an inprovement , not withstanding the issues mentioned it is not doom and gloom and people looking to escape en mass , so be wary of thinking that is the case
SX

[msmob]

Hi Pete, well if she really does have a good job then theoretically she could have qualified for a visa (& more recent visa free). She could have also had the money to fly etc. It would seem strange if it were not a touristy city as most people particularly those that don't travel loads tend to hit those first. I wouldn't go on red alert over it but I would go to yellow. If she's telling you she's been in your locality of the beaten track and have friends in your country then I would be cautious and not because I think she is a scammer. What she says could well be true or part true but you don't know whether she already has certain intentions. You might only dis cover this by getting to know her better - it may all be perfectly innocent. However, they may well  be a lot of Ukrainian women out after immigration out of Ukraine - the country is not in the best of states; civil war in the east, economic problems, etc. Are these friends also Ukrainian, if so she may be looking to join them. If I were you I would try to gauge how intereste she is in moving to where you are and hwe reaction if you state you would vd willing to move to Ukraine. Of course you would have to make it sound like you have a source of income so would not need work there or it would sound like idiocy. So ask a lot more questions and feel your way through I would.

If *I* were Pet82 - I'd defo ignore any 'advice' from you  - our 'serial success story'  - hint - REAL heavy irony intended

1/ IF the good lady is Ukrainian - she can easily visit - if she has BIO Chipped passport  - the only 'visa' she'd need is one to be resident - to work, legally

2/ WHY must you constantly see 'scammer' in every lady?  She has been clear in wishing to leave Ukraine and knowing and liking Dutch people.

Once again, Good luck to Pet82

[Trenchcoat]

1/ IF the good lady is Ukrainian - she can easily visit - if she has BIO Chipped passport  - the only 'visa' she'd need is one to be resident - to work,

That is only if she visited since last summer, she may have but odds are she probably travelled before then, if so she would have needed a visa to visit.

I said first and foremost in my post I did not think she was a scammer but she may have her own agenda in seeking a foreign guy. You need to read more carefully Mobe.

[msmob]

That is only if she visited since last summer, she may have but odds are she probably travelled before then, if so she would have needed a visa to visit.

I said first and foremost in my post I did not think she was a scammer but she may have her own agenda in seeking a foreign guy. You need to read more carefully Mobe.

Dear Trench,

Yes she could have visited before ...when a visa was required...but *I* am discussing the future.

[BdHvA]

Beste Peter,

Welkom,

Assuming you do not live in Delfzijl than I would not be worried about an Ukrainian visiting The Netherlands in the last ten years. It is no big deal there have been at least for the last 5 years some 4 flights from KBP to AMS every day, and back, for what it is worth they are usually 80% + full.

Slavic women tend to be Dutch in that they get to the point in short order.

As has been noted you can only be scammed if you do not think and are allowed.

My question to you, why are you not on a flight to Kiev already? It is a interesting city that is worth exploring.

[BoyNextDoor]

I've been with your situation before and it turns out to scam! But i didn't stop lol  Search again for international dating sites and found the real one that lead to my beautiful wife now.  This site http://www.ukrainebridesagency.com ensures that every woman is personally known and interviewed by each local agency in each Ukrainian city.

Hope this would help..   

[jone]

I've been with your situation before and it turns out to scam! But i didn't stop lol  Search again for international dating sites and found the real one that lead to my beautiful wife now.  This site http://www.ukrainebridesagency.com ensures that every woman is personally known and interviewed by each local agency in each Ukrainian city.

Hope this would help..   

RIght.  A PPL site.  Go to Elenas or another Subscription Site where the girls do not receive money for the number of letters they send.  And stay away from these sites.