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Author Topic: Third Time Lucky in Kiev  (Read 45854 times)

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Offline wallm

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #100 on: June 02, 2017, 10:16:45 AM »
Trench, in general I find that Ukrainian women are conservative when it comes to getting hot and heavy with new men. You said you shared a bed with this lady for a week. Hence some suspicion. Keep your eyes open. Do not get carried away. Hopefully she is THE one.

Offline Boethius

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #101 on: June 02, 2017, 11:10:59 AM »
Trench, in general I find that Ukrainian women are conservative when it comes to getting hot and heavy with new men.


I don't think they are more conservative, in general.  Quite the contrary, in fact.  However, I suspect they are more circumspect with foreign men, as Ukraine is inundated with sex tourists. 
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline Boethius

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #102 on: June 02, 2017, 11:27:27 AM »
I agree with this also, after you've done due diligence prior to meeting, met up & everything seems to sound out & she seems on the level, genuinely in love & into you then to go on long term having doubts is ridiculous at some point you need to take a leap of faith & leave it to fate whether it works out or not.

Those guys that get a girl who put faith in her & she turns out to be a bad girl, a scammer are often just unfortunate, a lot of it is luck of the draw I think and most guys including myself go out there really wanting the real deal often first time off so are all too willing to buy into anything vaguely looking something like the real thing only for it to emerge later she was no good. Experience down the line helps but experience also tends to cost. Once your lucky enough to know a girl that is for real though, the others can be seen a truer light.


She may be into you, but I think it's infatuation at this point, not love.  I mean, be realistic.  Love is a process.  You can be attracted to someone, want to sleep with him/her, believe everything about that person is wonderful, but what, really, does she know of you?  You can't even communicate on a deep level.  That doesn't mean that love can't develop, but it takes time.
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #103 on: June 02, 2017, 12:01:09 PM »
Trench, in general I find that Ukrainian women are conservative when it comes to getting hot and heavy with new men. You said you shared a bed with this lady for a week. Hence some suspicion. Keep your eyes open. Do not get carried away. Hopefully she is THE one.

I appreciate your thought for me Wall :) The first girl I met was very conservative, like a nun, but perhaps it would have been different if she had been more into me or perhaps not. It may well be why she was still single at around 30 that she had too conservative leanings when it came to closeness/affection with men.

The girl this time at first I thought it was going to be a re-run of the first girl I met. She did at least let me hold hands but because of first time lady meeting the thought of the same happening again was starting to p*ss me off. Anyway, fortunately this girl was giving better signs that she was into me that the first lady had not, not least to say aboutt the living arrangements :) So with the help of a forum member on here ;) I managed to crack it :D :P After that things generally although not without the odd issue went from strength to strength.

As said before on here when this issue last cropped up of the girl getting it on with the man it was roughly the 3 night rule that was followed here, yes surprisingly they seem to actually have a rule like this though of course it was never specifically stated to me in those direct terms. I get the impression that first night if a girl sleeps with you she is regarded as a bad girl, a slut who will sleep with anyone and hence be seen in a lesser light.

But yes Wall I think you're right in initially Ukrainian girls are conservative at first, but when they get hot & heavy they really do. Whether they do as a result of the man's influence or how much they are into him I guess only they know. I had a little suspicion at one point during the week, as I will still taken aback by it all, but this again seemed to prove false and all seems good. I think/hoping she is the one too :D
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #104 on: June 02, 2017, 01:17:17 PM »

She may be into you, but I think it's infatuation at this point, not love.  I mean, be realistic.  Love is a process.  You can be attracted to someone, want to sleep with him/her, believe everything about that person is wonderful, but what, really, does she know of you?  You can't even communicate on a deep level.  That doesn't mean that love can't develop, but it takes time.

Infatuation's good :P I'll take that, lol. Yeah you could be right Beothius, I think though this comes back to the question of 'What is Love?' interestingly asked on the Love Me documentary from a few years ago. Whether infatuation is a part of love, connects with it or develops into it, etc I have no idea. But I know that we are into each other a lot and seem a match for each other so I'm happy staking all on that and pushing forward. I'm careful not to push the pace any faster as I'm not looking for a flash in the pan situation or something that spins out of control. But not going to deliberately slow things either as like said think this would be damaging to the relationship taking the steam out of it that we want there ans is naturally how things are going. I kind of like reasonably fast developments it keeps life interesting and on the move.

I know though Beothius you're right when you say about our communication level not being deep. There is feeling there all the way of the right kind, but if her English was better we could have a deeper level of communication with one another. This does impede things a little here & there, but its something that I think will as is starting to disperse. Even messaging her daily helps to break down these communication issues and once she knows English a bit more it should be much better I think. 
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline Boethius

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #105 on: June 02, 2017, 01:29:24 PM »
I think infatuation is the desire of your hopes over reality.  Love can develop, IMHO, when you can accept the desired person, faults and all.


Is it love if a couple splits when the man can no longer support the woman financially?  Or when the man leaves the woman because she gets fat?  Or old?  I would argue there was never love in those relationships, though there may have been infatuation.


YVMV.
« Last Edit: June 02, 2017, 01:38:57 PM by Boethius »
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline ML

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #106 on: June 02, 2017, 01:34:16 PM »

It is love if a couple splits when the man can no longer support the woman financially? 

Boe, you need to fix this statement.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline ML

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #107 on: June 02, 2017, 01:35:59 PM »
So with the help of a forum member on here ;) I managed to crack it :D :P

That just sounds way too kinky for me !!!
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline Boethius

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #108 on: June 02, 2017, 01:39:10 PM »
Boe, you need to fix this statement.


Done.  Thanks.
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline ML

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #109 on: June 02, 2017, 01:57:17 PM »
Is it love if a couple splits when the man can no longer support the woman financially? 

Man:  Would you still love me if I lost all of my money?
Woman:  Yes I would still love you . . . and miss you too!

- - - - - - -

Man: Did you marry me just because I inherited several million dollars from my Uncle?
Woman:  I would have married you no matter whom you inherited the money from!
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline Muzh

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #110 on: June 02, 2017, 04:21:45 PM »
What's that supposed to mean?  :-\

You seem quite skeptical Muzh, why so?


It means you better go in with your eyes WIDE open. You barely know this woman to think or worse, believe she is "genuinely in love & into you" after a few meetings. Women take quite a while to fall in love with a man. That she may be as infatuated with you as you are with her, yes.
To argue with a man who has renounced the use and authority of reason, and whose philosophy consists in holding humanity in contempt, is like administering medicine to the dead. Thomas Paine - The American Crisis 1776-1783

Offline BillyB

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #111 on: June 02, 2017, 09:49:54 PM »
Women take quite a while to fall in love with a man. That she may be as infatuated with you as you are with her, yes.


Whether it's love or lust right now, Trench should enjoy the ride.

Hopefully she is THE one.


If not, she could be the one of many. Enjoy the ride.

Fund the audits, spread the word and educate people, write your politicians and other elected officials. Stay active in the fight to save our country. Over 220 generals and admirals say we are in a fight for our survival like no other time since 1776.

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #112 on: June 03, 2017, 03:27:02 AM »
Whether it's love or lust right now, Trench should enjoy the ride.

If not, she could be the one of many. Enjoy the ride.

Good advice BillyB I'll enjoy it, she's a fun girl to be with :D
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline msmob

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #113 on: June 03, 2017, 09:05:45 AM »
Trench, in general I find that Ukrainian women are conservative when it comes to getting hot and heavy with new men. You said you shared a bed with this lady for a week. Hence some suspicion. Keep your eyes open. Do not get carried away. Hopefully she is THE one.

??

NOT my experience and judging by ( say) ML's/ Bill's and many others - not theirs, either ?..

Are you sure you weren't telling them how crap their country was ?

Offline msmob

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #114 on: June 03, 2017, 09:08:54 AM »

I don't think they are more conservative, in general.  Quite the contrary, in fact.  However, I suspect they are more circumspect with foreign men, as Ukraine is inundated with sex tourists.

Hmm, but IS it ? ....  It MIGHT be inundated with clueless guys who THINK the women will jump into bed with a foreign guy, because of his passport ...



Offline wallm

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #115 on: June 03, 2017, 12:51:52 PM »
??

NOT my experience and judging by ( say) ML's/ Bill's and many others - not theirs, either ?..

Are you sure you weren't telling them how crap their country was ?

No. I was in Ukraine, not UK.

Offline Boethius

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #116 on: June 04, 2017, 01:10:07 PM »
No. I was in Ukraine, not UK.


Either way, you're still wrong. :)
After the fall of communism, the biggest mistake Boris Yeltsin's regime made was not to disband the KGB altogether. Instead it changed its name to the FSB and, to many observers, morphed into a gangster organisation, eventually headed by master criminal Vladimir Putin. - Gerard Batten

Offline msmob

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #117 on: June 05, 2017, 01:12:24 AM »
No. I was in Ukraine, not UK.

You seem to have a short memory - as it was Ukraine you were 'running down' ...

You seem to have been as 'observant' of the women as the place...     


Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #118 on: June 06, 2017, 01:55:50 AM »
I get the joke Wall, its quite a good one ;D

Anyway, just wanted to round this thread off by thanking those that have helped me get to this stage in dating in the FSU. So particularly appreciate the input of 2tallbill, BillyB over the year and of course Jone last summer. Faux Pas, you were also very helpful at the start when I was first getting going on all this so I am grateful to you there. ML your comments are also worthy displaying the unusual trait of being both amusing and level headed :D Also thanks to the many others that have helped out with advice along the way, I appreciate you all.

Lastly Moby your a miserable git and I appreciate your advice also ;D
 
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Offline ML

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #119 on: June 10, 2017, 08:49:47 PM »
ML your comments are also worthy displaying the unusual trait of being both amusing and level headed

Sorry, I will have to work harder to shed the 'level headed' trait.
A beautiful woman is pleasant to look at, but it is easier to live with a pleasant acting one.

Offline John Gaunt

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #120 on: June 06, 2021, 07:22:15 AM »
Trench
Remind us of what happened with this gal?

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #121 on: June 06, 2021, 09:32:34 AM »
Trench
Remind us of what happened with this gal?

Ah like 2tallbill you like to dig up the oldens hey.

Well she wanted to come to the UK to see me, she said I had promised and refused to see me in her hometown first. She had asked for us to go on holiday together which we did and at the same time she might have mentioned seeing me after in the UK possibly. I may have agreed at that point but I am unsure as generally with stuff like that I take it as a general idea, not a cast iron promise. Anyway I told her that it is pretty impossible for a girl to get a tourist visa from Ukraine if she is young, single and not in a well paid job - most forum members agreed on this also. I never thought that there was a fixed way of doing something that I couldn't meet her before she came to me through the easier marriage route etc. Anyway, she was very stubborn and took against this and accused me of already being a married man. I doubted her intentions for wanting to come to the UK.

Well it end there, she stopped responding to my posts after a while and that was that. I know of her social media stuff, she doesn't post up on it a lot. I can only assume she is still going and enjoying her life in Kherson since she refused any compromise solution I came up with. I may contact her sometime soon and see how she is going, one wonders whether a few extra years in Kherson particularly under virus & lockdown may have humbled her attitude towards me.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

Online 2tallbill

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Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #122 on: June 06, 2021, 10:50:54 AM »
I may contact her sometime soon and see how she is going, one wonders whether a few
extra years in Kherson particularly under virus & lockdown may have humbled her attitude
towards me.

My advice is to not recycle girls. You two gave it a go and it didn't work out.
She is fundamentally the same woman and you are the same man. This isn't
Hollywood where a couple against all odds figure it out.

There are millions of women in the FSU that you haven't given it a go with,
so forget this girl and move on.

Udachi!

Bill
FSUW are not for entry level daters
FSUW don't do vague
FSUW like a man of action. Be a man of action 
If you find a promising girl, get your butt on a plane.
There are a hundred ways to be successful and a thousand ways to f#ck it up
Just kiss the girl, don't ask her first. Tolerate NO excuses!

Offline John Gaunt

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #123 on: June 06, 2021, 03:50:37 PM »
Ah like 2tallbill you like to dig up the oldens hey.

Well she wanted to come to the UK to see me, she said I had promised and refused to see me in her hometown first. She had asked for us to go on holiday together which we did and at the same time she might have mentioned seeing me after in the UK possibly. I may have agreed at that point but I am unsure as generally with stuff like that I take it as a general idea, not a cast iron promise. Anyway I told her that it is pretty impossible for a girl to get a tourist visa from Ukraine if she is young, single and not in a well paid job - most forum members agreed on this also. I never thought that there was a fixed way of doing something that I couldn't meet her before she came to me through the easier marriage route etc. Anyway, she was very stubborn and took against this and accused me of already being a married man. I doubted her intentions for wanting to come to the UK.

Well it end there, she stopped responding to my posts after a while and that was that. I know of her social media stuff, she doesn't post up on it a lot. I can only assume she is still going and enjoying her life in Kherson since she refused any compromise solution I came up with. I may contact her sometime soon and see how she is going, one wonders whether a few extra years in Kherson particularly under virus & lockdown may have humbled her attitude towards me.
Ah, I remember. She’s the one you didn’t want to get a UK visa for after saying you would.

Fatal mistake to make with an  Fsuw, saying you’ll do something and then retract.

Bill gives good advice. It didn’t happen then and it won’t happen now.
You’re not a different Trench to whom you were back then.

Offline Trenchcoat

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Re: Third Time Lucky in Kiev
« Reply #124 on: June 07, 2021, 02:56:21 AM »
Ah, I remember. She’s the one you didn’t want to get a UK visa for after saying you would.

Fatal mistake to make with an  Fsuw, saying you’ll do something and then retract.

Bill gives good advice. It didn’t happen then and it won’t happen now.
You’re not a different Trench to whom you were back then.

I didn't exactly retract it just became apparent that there would be no chance as far as UK Visa crowd were concerned. I never realised that it was such a fixated thing in her mind or that she was taking it all in such a literal way as that it should be done in a set order. I never really took it off the cards just that there were other more immediate options to go to first in terms of meet ups, etc. The fact that she was so rigid in her mind took me by surprise.

There were other issues of course, the clothes spending being the main one. I didn't mind buying her a few things but it was too dominant in her mind that it was ruining the relationship. I should have been firmer with her and that was a mistake in my part.

She had some good sides that I might not have fully appreciated looking back but my lack of experience dating FSW particularly like her messed any chance up of the relationship working.
"If you make your own bread, then and only then, are you a free man unchained and alive living in pooty tang paradise, or say no and live in Incel island with all the others." - Krimster

 

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