Ok so my ex sister-in-law wants my kids to come visit her kids in June

[GregfromGa]

They are practically the same age. I am actually considering it since it's about the kids. They are first cousins. I always kind of liked her sister. Her mother thinks I should let the kids stay for the entire summer. I'm thinking a month with lots of stipulations. The ex sister in law has a boy that is also involved in wrestling so I'll want my Nicholas to get some good training for at least a few hours a day for a week because he'll miss his wrestling camp here. I'll want to skype basically every day. The ex isn't going but I'm afraid that will have to change at least for two weeks. I told the ex sister-in-law that I will not discuss the visit with her mother. She hasn't been nice to me in 14 years so I'm not interesting in her opinions about what I should do with my kids now. Also her dad has been here working for 3 months so he can foot part of the airline ticket bill for the kids. I dont think that's asking for too much.

[Muzh]

Geezus.


First, are you talking about the kid's grandfather living in Ukraine to pay for part of the airline ticket? Where many don't have a pot to piss in regardless how many months they are working. The guy who would probably pay for everything the kids need while in Ukraine?


Second, why not the whole summer? How many more chances will they have that opportunity to integrate with their family abroad?


Finally, instead of stipulations, why not something like "Kids enjoy your summer with your other family. I'll skype you as often as you want and you can do the same. Love ya."


Think about the kids instead of "what her family did to you." 

[Gator]

Greg, it seems like an excellent opportunity for the development of your children.   One question:  do you have any legal recourse if they are not returned?

[ML]

Last I remember, Greg got the Grandfather a job here in USA.

[GregfromGa]

Geezus.


First, are you talking about the kid's grandfather living in Ukraine to pay for part of the airline ticket? Where many don't have a pot to piss in regardless how many months they are working. The guy who would probably pay for everything the kids need while in Ukraine?


Second, why not the whole summer? How many more chances will they have that opportunity to integrate with their family abroad?


Finally, instead of stipulations, why not something like "Kids enjoy your summer with your other family. I'll skype you as often as you want and you can do the same. Love ya."


Think about the kids instead of "what her family did to you." 

Yes the same guy that has came here and worked the last 2 summers and has spent more on cigarettes that his two grandchildren during that time. The same guy that has been here 5 times and has yet to buy his ticket yet and of course his wife that has been here 18 times at least and has yet to buy her ticket. They are my kids. There will always be stipulations until they are grown and pay their own way. The whole summer???You mean the summer where I am entitled 2 weeks that I may or may not have plans?

[GregfromGa]

Last I remember, Greg got the Grandfather a job here in USA.

  Yes he does pretty good here with no bills whatsoever while working here. Oh and not many bills over there. No car, no rent, etc etc

[GregfromGa]

Greg, it seems like an excellent opportunity for the development of your children.   One question:  do you have any legal recourse if they are not returned?

No recourse Gator but I dont see her staying. It's pretty much a shit hole everywhere you turn. She''ll be leaving her other kid here so I know they'll be back.

[Muzh]

Last I remember, Greg got the Grandfather a job here in USA.

My bad.


I thought the guy was in UA.

[BillyB]

No recourse Gator but I dont see her staying.

I remember watching a man in family court crying and asking the judge to help him bring his kids back into his life. The ex wife, who was Native American, took them on an Indian reservation. The judge told him there is nothing he can do.


From what you said in the past about your ex, she's not entirely trustworthy and you'll be sending them to a country that is not in a stable condition. If you can't handle the worst possible scenario, don't let your kids go over there.

[GregfromGa]

Trust me Billy I've thought about it but I also want to think about the kids. While they certainly don't have the right to spend time and know their cousins I want them to. Kiev is relatively safe. They live in a nice area. Who knows it may be safer know than in the future years. I have always tried to get along with my ex. I've certainly moved on in my life and I know she knows it. I cant tell it bothers her but she'll be ok. It's hard to believe it's been 14 years since my first trip to Tallinn and Kiev the summer of 2001. Time doesn't stand still. I have maintained that I don't recommend this endeavor for people. The differences in cultures is many. I'm not saying there isnt exceptions to the rule. Hell we have people here that have been married 15 years. With that being said there are far more crashes and burns. This process has helped me make new friends and most importantly it helped me discover the best Cuban Cafe in Tampa. Ain't that right Gator??? I still poke my head in and out here from time to time. This board and some of the people here I feel have been with me though every step of the way. The opinions here I value more than you guys and gals realize. Smart people here. If I were starting this all over again I would certainly camp out here for a while.I dont do much facebook stuff but I use it to keep up with the 150 exchange students I have supervised in the past. If anyone wants to follow me there feel free to send me a message.