Custody dispute --> Kidnapping

[ECOCKS]

Ugh, this is hot news in Boise, ID today...


http://www.ktvb.com/news/localnews/stories/ktvbn-aug1909-amberalert.f8dcad0d.html

[BC]

Anyone that has been close to such a situation knows what a nightmare it is.

Fortunately many countries have adopted the Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction which provides some realistic avenues of relief (but no guarantees) in many, but not all countries, ie RU

http://hcch.e-vision.nl/index_en.php?act=conventions.text&cid=24

Also today most passport issuing consulates require both parents permission before issuing travel documents and passports.  This is a direct result of too many such cases in the past and a good move in the right direction.

One can only hope that the news to border officials travels faster than the fleeing party's flight, but often this is not the case.

I am surprised by the complacency of the custodial parent during an especially critical time, not so much regarding neighbors that did not attempt to intervene.

[ECOCKS]

This happens and it is increasingly common. Still, after a 10 year marriage and being a thousand miles from the mother's location, with a custody agreement in place, I would not exactly say he was complacent. Of course, if she had threatened or there was violence, that would change things.

One thing that always disturbs me is the stereotyping of FSUW that will occur from this by various folks.

So, another AM/FSUW marriage hits the rocks. This time after 10 years. Someone mentioned key marital milestones a week or so ago and 10 years was on their list. This one had either a 14 or 16 year age difference for those who wonder.

[BC]

This happens and it is increasingly common. Still, after a 10 year marriage and being a thousand miles from the mother's location, with a custody agreement in place, I would not exactly say he was complacent. Of course, if she had threatened or there was violence, that would change things.

One thing that always disturbs me is the stereotyping of FSUW that will occur from this by various folks.

So, another AM/FSUW marriage hits the rocks. This time after 10 years. Someone mentioned key marital milestones a week or so ago and 10 years was on their list. This one had either a 14 or 16 year age difference for those who wonder.

Leaving kids alone on the day the divorce papers are served?.. oh well

And yeah, milestones..  don't much believe in that either.  The age difference grows on you, getting worse, not better over time.

[GoodOlBoy]

And yeah, milestones..  don't much believe in that either.  The age difference grows on you, getting worse, not better over time.

I agree BC, milestones don't mean jack sh!t.

They are only times marked in a period of your life with somebody, BUT...In the end, relationship's today can go South in a New York minute.

I can't begin to think of how many marriages that I have personally known, that have broken up.

Funny thing, it is almost always a surprise couple.

You know, the couple you least suspect to be having any kind of marital problems.

Happy on the outside and I guess, miserable on the inside.


GOB

[BC]

Funny thing, it is almost always a surprise couple.

You know, the couple you least suspect to be having any kind of marital problems.

Happy on the outside and I guess, miserable on the inside.


GOB

Yeah, surprises around these rooms too..

The 'happy outside, miserable inside' is one variation am sure. Have experienced other variations though.  Sure, there is a lot of snap crackle and pop at the end of almost all, but before getting there I think many relationships just fizzle.  It takes a heck of a lot of work to keep a marriage going, many get weary, or simply bored. Many just can't accept the idea that people do change over time (like getting older), usually reaching a point that they think they have missed out on something in life and need to go 'find themselves', yes.. often 'in' or 'on' someone else.

Strangely enough, marriages that face the most challenges seem to fare best as far as longevity goes.  Talking external challenges and not personal problems between the couple.

Expecting a partner to remain a static being, the same as on their wedding day is unrealistic.  This is where I firmly believe the big fallacy lies with chasing RW..  We want something, finally get it and then she grows into something else.. RW must feel the same. A good part of the misguided thinking about this whole RW deal is that men think their partners' values will not change over time.  But in the end it's sorta like taking someone to the ocean for the first time and expecting them not to jump in.

When driving down the street and see a wedding parade, I usually say 'poor souls'..  My wife asked me once why and I responded "Because if I always say that I'll be right more than half the time".

To keep this somewhat on topic, I submit that most AM in this quest and probably the man in the article have already divorced at least once and are looking for a second chance at the bottom of the ninth. 

[ECOCKS]

I agree with you wholeheartedly on the external challenges issues. Couples who deal with external issues (successfully) would tend to build a stronger sense of being a team or partnership which should help them develop that strong marital relationship.

Still nothing on finding this young man or either of the two cars or either of the suspects.

[Muddy]

"There was a knock at the door, the (male suspect) said (Luca’s) mother is here and would like to see him, and he walked out into the hallway," Compton said. “There was also information that there was a female voice when the young boy went out to the hall. The female was addressing him by name and he actually shouted and said ‘no, mom,’" Compton said. "It appears that he recognized his mother and he didn't want to go with her.”

That's the last the 14-year-old girl at the home heard, and before she knew it, Luca was gone.

Police believe the boy was taken by his mother and an unknown male acquaintance.

one of her boyfriends?

[ECOCKS]

That would seem an obvious guess.

Don't miss that they were separated for a year and he has just now filed the papers. From the report, he has a GF (with a 14 yr old daughter) so, nothing wrong with BG's and GF's in this situation. Although I will admit the references to AZ (Scottsdale and Phoenix) did remind me of the comments about the Russian community there and that discussion several months ago involving the woman who was instigating trouble among married couples. Maybe no relation, who knows?

[Muddy]

So stupid, they both can go to prison for a long time.

[ECOCKS]

It also drastically increases the father's odds of gaining full custody. The court will generally view this as endangerment of the child. The man is probably in more trouble than he realizes.

[BC]

It also drastically increases the father's odds of gaining full custody. The court will generally view this as endangerment of the child. The man is probably in more trouble than he realizes.

Unless they are already outside the country and back in Uzbekistan, which seems like a good possibility considering it took 4 hours to do a statewide Amber alert.  Boise have an airport?  Hope the child is at least safe.

http://www.kivitv.com/Global/story.asp?S=10967219

[ECOCKS]

Yep, I'm sure they're looking into that. It would be different to get out of the US/Canada in 4 hours from Boise but probably not impossible. Can only hope they'll catch them. Since they had to wait for the boy to be away from his father I'm thinking he was driven somewhere.

It is a bit surprising that the car hasn't turned up yet, but apparently it's not at the local airport and there must not be any sign of the boy transiting an airport so far. Maybe trying to drive to Mexico or, if they're really stupid, into Canada.

The part I was talking with my wife about earlier this evening is that she's been here 10 years. She surely knows that this is a long shot getting out of the country or staying underground for very long. The odds aren't in her favor.

Anyway, the drama will play out I guess.

[Vaughn]

She's no dummy - despite having committed a very stupid and desperate act.

http://www.linkedin.com/in/katerinaprincipali

[ECOCKS]

Yeah, seems odd that she would do something like this.

Ah well, takes all kinds I guess.

[ECOCKS]

Resolved, mother arrested and in custody.

http://www.idahostatesman.com/localnews/story/886602.html

[GoodOlBoy]

She's no dummy - despite having committed a very stupid and desperate act. http://www.linkedin.com/in/katerinaprincipali

She has a degree (MA) from the University of Notre Dame, in Conflict Resolution and Negotiation . 

You have got to be kidding me? 

I would like to see the look on the judges face when he hears that one!


GOB

[ECOCKS]

There goes my opinion of the quality of ND's academics...

[Vaughn]

There was NO divorce.... nobody was awarded custody of the boy.

Suddenly the landscape changes. AZ has issued a no-contact order
between husband and son.

FOXnews reports that according to her attorney, she's been trying to
track her husband and son down for quite a while...

If there's substance to this report, hubby has some serious explaining
to do. Luca's being tossed around like personal property.

[Shadow]

Too many of such cases this year unfortunately.

Including one where the Dutch police sent out a full alert while the American father got cooperation from the Embassy to abduct the child through Brussels airport....
Both parents had been given custody, though by judges in different countries. Result is both parents are wanted in each others country for kidnapping...

And the real victims here are the children, tossed around like some piece of furniture.