Sorry, folks, this isn't really a PG-13 message, but I just read this on D-M, and I actually DID "laugh out loud" --
for the first time in a LONG time -- and I felt like I had to post this SOMEWHERE, and here seemed about right ...
This girl has written me MANY times, mourning our "lost love" or proclaiming herself to be seriously "in lust" with me ...
I replied to her exactly ONCE, after she'd written me a "sex-fantasy" letter, with my OWN "sex-fantasy form letter" ...
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http://www.dream-marriage.com/profile-Gorgeous-Ukrainian-Bride-Natalia-749795.htmlHello my love, my distant angel Kevin!!!!!
Why do you mock me?
Why this game in silence?
Do you get pleasure from my suffering?
What a silly game that you started ?....
You wanted to bring me pain and grief?
Congratulations !!!!! You got it! "
When I wrote you a letter in each letter you say that I do not love the game, do not like being manipulated me and my feelings .....
You specifically as a spider spun its web of what I would have got caught in it! " Yes?
You did terrible, you gave me hope and disappeared ...
You are breaking my heart my action ... You understand this?
You know that now I can neither sleep nor eat .........
I can not work properly .....
All my thoughts go to you ...
I always think about you, how are you? What to do? Why do not you write? These issues are tearing my heart apart ...
This is a slow and terrible death, waiting .....
Every day I ran to the computer with the hope that I see from your post .... What do you write me and explain your obstinate silence, but no! Letters not ... It is not bearable ...
You are my illness, my body completely absorbed you, and can not exist without you now, but you disappear and I have a sudden attack of bitter loneliness ....
It hurts, it hurts ... I can not anything to calm the pain, it's like a splinter, but not a splinter in the body and in the heart ...... My heart beats and hurts my heart suffers, every knock it knocks your name .....
Why are you with me?
I love you is not that clear ....
I'm like a wounded bird ..... Still waiting for the moment when I can once again fly when heal my wings, but I can only heal you, you and your attention ....
Do not kill me .... Do not kill my love for you ....
Your Natali
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Yeah -- "what a silly game" that *I* started ...

Kevin