Need advice, suggestions, or personal experiences.

[Kineo]

Bleau,

From what it looks like to me, you are one lucky dude!

[SFandEE]

Bleau,

She does sound genuine to me as well.  Especially concerning her openness to sharing some of her expenses and introducing you to her family.  This is very positive.

Have you considered back-up plans for meeting another woman or women when you travel to Ukraine?  It seems like she might be a great choice, but what if ........

Are women in your area where you live not as interesting and attractive as this woman to you?

Good luck--look forward to hearing how it goes for you both.

[Patagonie]

Put as possible your ass in a plane, sooner than later. September is too late. You need to climb over in a relation, difficult to maintain the desire just by skype and phone.
Schedule a whole package for a backup plan.

[bleau]

I would like to thank all of you that are contributing to my post. We're working 12 hour days 6 days a week in my shop until June so I'm bouncing all around.
This lady, I've never met a lady such as this one and this week she's really picked my worn out brain and I didn't realize it until she told me....good boy.

She started asking me questions: Do you like classical music, I said yes, my mom was a musician and artist and when I was 8 years old I was taking piano lessons in classical music all the way through college, and I also have my piano and organ in my home. She didn't comment but just said..ok.

She then asked me did I like the violin and I said yes....do you like going to classical concerts and do you like fine art since your mom was an artist?..I said yes and go to Atlanta as often as I can to concerts and visit the art museum....ok.

She then told me...I am a musician by education and a violinist in my city orchestra and I also teach the piano but I cannot make enough money for myself and send my kids to university so I have my business. It is my dream to be nothing more than a teacher of the piano. What about this in your community? I told her we sho need a piano teach here....ok was her answer. She has picked my brain guys.

She asked me what type of music do I listen to the most...I said Bluegrass....silence...may I ask you....what is Bluegrass? She said interesting and I've never heard Bluegrass so I sent her a sho nuff banjo and fiddle song in an email.....her reply...amazing! That was the reply I've gotten from her but I could tell she was ok with it.

She asked me had I read any of the classics and I said yes....MOM made sure of that!...ok  Have you traveled around?....I said yes, MOM made sure I got to see other cultures....ok.

She told me I've had a lot of men write to me and I asked them these same things, She said they seemed more interested in my long legs and talk that I didn't understand . She said you answered my questions with all the right answers I wanted to hear and I believe you. She told me you are very patient with me and try to understand what I'm saying to you....the other men didn't. These men would frustrate me and I would care for no more communication with them.
You've never once mentioned my long legs to me, or how sexy I look, the other men did and the other men told me they wanted to fly to me immediately. We both agreed on September to both of us having business commitments and this has pleased me. I would never meet a man with so short a communication between us, it would be a joke for me. I do not want to be just a hot looking Russian woman on your arm....I would want to be you wife to be loved and cared for from your heart and I will know that I am your Queen, not your hot looking Russian wife..I pity the Russian girls that get conned into hot looking Russian wife marriage.

She said we have serious talks and learning to look to the inside of ourselves not our outward appearance and all the material things in the world..this pleases me.
She said I have several friends writing men and they laugh at these men and think they are a joke...I do not think you are a joke. My friends are a little jealous of me now because of the true relationship and this bond between us that you and I are doing slowly and with respect between us. This is what I need and want in my life...not a joker. You also respect the fact that if I marry you I will be giving up everything to relocate to America with you and I can tell you have patient feelings for me when we discuss this so I would be able to do this with you and feel comfortable with it.

She said because of our talks and discussions on what real life is about, what we both want in our lives and they are the same and what the future could have for us, I will welcome you into home, my family and my friends when you arrive to me in September. Do not worry yourself, you are not a kid and a joker, we will be ok together and I feel this.

No I have no plans to visit another lady..only this one.

Have a great week guys and gals..

Bleau

[ML]

She then told me...I am a musician by education and a violinist in my city orchestra and I also teach the piano but I cannot make enough money for myself and send my kids to university so I have my business. It is my dream to be nothing more than a teacher of the piano. What about this in your community? I told her we sho need a piano teach here....ok was her answer. She has picked my brain guys.

You have been having very deep conversations with the woman for how long?

And she is just now telling you what her occupation is?
You have never asked?

Something fishy here.

[bleau]

I see nothing fishy here with this lady and we've been talking long enough, I know and knew she had a business, I know where it's located, I have pics of it with her working in it.
I have a translator friend that has talked to her personally and in conference calls with the three of us together every other day.
I knew she was a musician I just never asked the  details of her past or the present as a musician.
I see no red flags here and i definitely see nothing fishy at all about her and I'm definitely not going to get paranoid over something that's not there.

[Faux Pas]

I see nothing fishy here with this lady and we've been talking long enough, I know and knew she had a business, I know where it's located, I have pics of it with her working in it.
I have a translator friend that has talked to her personally and in conference calls with the three of us together every other day.
I knew she was a musician I just never asked the  details of her past or the present as a musician.
I see no red flags here and i definitely see nothing fishy at all about her and I'm definitely not going to get paranoid over something that's not there.

From what you have stated there is nothing fishy. I would say you and the lady have gotten to a stage of full disclosure and this is a milestone in your budding relationship and a good thing. Remember there are a number of people in this pursuit that see and even seek evil at every turn. Don't let their paranoia rub off on you. Sure one needs to be cautious but there is certainly a point of diminishing return for caution. Eyes wide open and let the chips fall where they may.

[ML]

I never said there was anything fishy about the woman.
I think the story is fishy.

- - - - - - -

You have been having very deep conversations with the woman for how long?

And she is just now telling you what her occupation is?
You have never asked?

Something fishy here.

[Faux Pas]

I never said there was anything fishy about the woman.
I think the story is fishy.

- - - - - - -

You have been having very deep conversations with the woman for how long?

And she is just now telling you what her occupation is?
You have never asked?

Something fishy here.

So, what part of the story is fishy to you ML?

While they had had some long, deep and meaningful discussions you feel they should have discussed every nook and cranny of their lives? Complete with nudie pictures, dildos and panty fabric I suppose?

They are early in a long distance communication. They haven't met face to face. There are still many things the have not told each other. She told him she ran a business. Now she's told him of her future dreams. Why does that have to be fishy except for the paranoid?

[ML]

After upteen, deep conversations, he writes that  she just then told him:

"She then told me...I am a musician by education and a violinist in my city orchestra and I also teach the piano but I cannot make enough money for myself and send my kids to university so I have my business."

Again, nothing  fishy about her.
But this sentence makes the whole story fishy.

Plus it still seems this man sounds so enthralled with tiny snippets of words from this woman, like a late teenager or early 20s guy with zero experiences with women.  I posted that early on, and now this latest tidbit just adds to the fishiness.

And I am not paranoid at all.  I have had virtually zero problems with these women, so have no bad experiences floating around in my mind.

And to OP:  You don't have to give a sheeeeet at all that I think this story is fishy, so don't get all bent up about it.  No I am not asking for proof of anything and don't really care if you are posting a true story or not.  It is just my opinion . . . just as everyone here can have their opinion.  Opinions are free.   

[dbneeley]

Bleau,

Don't let "ManLooking" discourage you. So far, many of us have seen absolutely zero red flags. As always, we only now what you tell us, of course--and also as always, things tend to come out a bit at a time. That is fine. The kind of "fishiness" he sees in an innocuous account like yours may be more a mark as to why he may still be "looking" rather than "finding." That is a major problem with becoming somewhat paranoid with no basis for it.

It seems the temperaments of both of you are extremely similar--and that is a terrific thing. It also seems that your primary values are also in synch to a large degree. Obviously, the matter of personal chemistry will in large measure not be feasible to determine until you and she are together in person--but if things continue to go as they are right now, I seriously doubt that will be a problem.

It'll be most interesting to see how this one works out.

David

[bleau]

Thanks Faux Pas & dbneeley for your positive and encouraging post and the other fine posters.
ManLooking, I have no words to describe a person like you with your negativity and paranoia concerning a relationship that's having positive results, I've yet to read either of your post all the way thorough and will not read them through. May I ask you...have you had and do you have a positive relationship with someone other than yourself and I think it would be a plus if you even liked yourself. I've had one failure at this and learned from my mistakes and doing things with my lady now much differently than I would have before and it seems to be working for both of us with her positive attitude also. I dropped  hints on an earlier post as to what a lot of ladies seem to think about the guys out there drooling over them.
ML, I have a friend on this forum that asked me to post my experience with a new, upbeat and positive relationship after having an ass crash with another Russian Woman in Russia...have you had any ass crashes with Russian Women you would like to share with us?

dbneeley, I'll continue making post as time moves on for my lady and myself. We also do corporate web development and when i return from Ukraine I'll put up the report with a lot of photos on our test site and post the url here on the forum.
If I have an ass crash with this lady, which either of us doubt very seriously we will, then I will be the first to say...My ass crashed big time with the lady in Ukraine and I'll tell you why I had an ass crash with her so maybe it will help you not to have to wear bandages on your ass one day.

Cheers!..

Bleau

[Rubicon]

Bleau,

I think you are doing absolutely nothing wrong yet everything right.  If it does not work out between you and the lady, it's nobody's fault.  Sometimes you meet somebody in person and you like them but the romantic spark you may have expected is not there.  Hopefully this will not be the case, and you and the lady will have a great time which leads to more great times.  Most people here would love to see you succeed, so ignore anyone else.  This is your gig, enjoy it!!  Best wishes to you.

[Daveman]

Thanks Faux Pas & dbneeley for your positive and encouraging post and the other fine posters.
ManLooking, I have no words to describe a person like you with your negativity and paranoia concerning a relationship that's having positive results, I've yet to read either of your post all the way thorough and will not read them through. May I ask you...have you had and do you have a positive relationship with someone other than yourself and I think it would be a plus if you even liked yourself. I've had one failure at this and learned from my mistakes and doing things with my lady now much differently than I would have before and it seems to be working for both of us with her positive attitude also. I dropped  hints on an earlier post as to what a lot of ladies seem to think about the guys out there drooling over them.
ML, I have a friend on this forum that asked me to post my experience with a new, upbeat and positive relationship after having an ass crash with another Russian Woman in Russia...have you had any ass crashes with Russian Women you would like to share with us?

dbneeley, I'll continue making post as time moves on for my lady and myself. We also do corporate web development and when i return from Ukraine I'll put up the report with a lot of photos on our test site and post the url here on the forum.
If I have an ass crash with this lady, which either of us doubt very seriously we will, then I will be the first to say...My ass crashed big time with the lady in Ukraine and I'll tell you why I had an ass crash with her so maybe it will help you not to have to wear bandages on your ass one day.

Cheers!..

Bleau

Holy Prostate Batman, that's a proctological probing of prolific profundity!  Makes one wonder if the account is still in arrears ... do you regret assking your questions? do you feel the responses are assinine?  :evil:  

Relax... a variety of opinions is always a good thing. Take what makes sense to you and toss the rest.

[dbneeley]

Holy Prostate Batman, that's a proctological probing of prolific profundity!

Daveman,

I had to laugh at the "Holy Prostate Batman" reference, since I am preparing in a few hours to go to the hospital for a week or so, during which I will likely have my own prostate extracted. Unfortunately, the clinic doesn't have Internet access so I'll likely be suffering withdrawal symptoms from that as well.

David

[Hammer2722]

 Hi bleau, I have been reading your thread with great interest. It seems like you have got a real keper on your hands and you are both progressing at your own pace. Many people have told you to get on a plane ASAP! Somtimes that won't work for everyone. I think you both are playing this in a very smart way and you both seem to be in synch with each other. I think ML isn't trying to bash you. Maybe he is just reading your post diffently. Just as Daveman said, your going to get lots of input. Only you know what will work for you and what won't. Filter it all out and then run with it. I sincerely wish you the best as this lady seems like a great catch. I do hope you continue to post and keep us all posted on your progress whether it works out or not. Poka!!!!  
Hector

[Muzh]

So, what part of the story is fishy to you ML?

While they had had some long, deep and meaningful discussions you feel they should have discussed every nook and cranny of their lives? Complete with nudie pictures, dildos and panty fabric I suppose?

LMFAO

Isn't it amazing how some people "see" red flags where there are none?

Go Bleau go!

[Faux Pas]

LMFAO

Isn't it amazing how some people "see" red flags where there are none?

Go Bleau go!

Isn't it though? The crabs in a bucket scenario. *Cliff Clavin voice* "Well everything seems to check out and green flags all the way which is a red flag to your logical thinking man" Nothing really wrong just somehow the "story is now fishy"
 

[Anotherkiwi]

I'm actually partly in ManLooking's corner on this one.  Although I don't think that the story is even slightly "fishy," and I wish both of them the very best of luck, I too am surprised by the fact that it took so long to discuss occupations.  With everyone I've ever dated here, or written/spoken to in the quest for my "perfect" RW, "what work do you do?" has always been one of the first questions from both sides - and from the RW it's usually qualified by "tell me exactly..."   Most of the time at a party it will be the second question after "how do you know X [the host/ess]?"  Very seldom will you see a good description of their job in their website profiles, although titles such as "lawyer" should be self-explanatory.

Of course there are thousands of potential topics to talk about when starting a relationship, but in this particular search I would have thought that finding out the occupation was vitally important from the point of view of future employment in the new country (unless you're intending to start a family very soon after your younger woman arrives, or you're already at retirement age).

[Faux Pas]

I'm actually partly in ManLooking's corner on this one.  Although I don't think that the story is even slightly "fishy," and I wish both of them the very best of luck, I too am surprised by the fact that it took so long to discuss occupations.  With everyone I've ever dated here, or written/spoken to in the quest for my "perfect" RW, "what work do you do?" has always been one of the first questions from both sides - and from the RW it's usually qualified by "tell me exactly..."   Most of the time at a party it will be the second question after "how do you know X [the host/ess]?"  Very seldom will you see a good description of their job in their website profiles, although titles such as "lawyer" should be self-explanatory.

Of course there are thousands of potential topics to talk about when starting a relationship, but in this particular search I would have thought that finding out the occupation was vitally important from the point of view of future employment in the new country (unless you're intending to start a family very soon after your younger woman arrives, or you're already at retirement age).

bleau explained that much earlier. He asked what she did and she told him she owned and ran a business. She sent pictures of her in the shop. What is he supposed to do, call her a liar? She considers herself a professional musician would would like to teach. I dunno guys, I just don't see the fishy aspect. Especially when everything else matches up so nicely. Everything bleau has stated points to this lady being quite remarkable 

[bleau]

Once again I would like to thank the ones of you replying to my post. I would also like to say if I've offended anyone, especially ML, then I apologize and I think maybe you read my post sometimes incorrectly. I do not bash people on forums nor do I bash people in real life but I do usually speak my mind.

For you of those that think there is something fishy here with this lady and our correspondence and our developing serious relationship then continue to be of "weak mind". Read through some of the things I'm telling you that comes from the mouth of a beautiful Russian lady that can and could cause you failures with your search for a beautiful Russian lady with a beautiful heart such as I have found.

In the conversation about flying to a lady ASAP after a short correspondence with her this may work well for some but not for a lady such as mine. When we had this discussion she told me one thing I refused to do is for a man to get the hots for me and want to fly to me soon after some talks together so he could think he would be the first to me and I would fall deeply in love with him because of this and him trying to prove his manhood to me. NO!

She said I have No Desire to meet a man so soon after some correspondence, sit on a park bench or in a cafe listening to him tell me his life history and what he can do for me if I marry him and then I give him a 10 minute tour of what my boring life has been. And when all is done he will ask me, well what do you think, do you think we are meant for each other and will live happily ever after. She said NO, and I would send him on his way to try this approach on another lady.

She said Bleau, I want romance in my life and want to be romanced by a man not put up on a pedestal from a park bench, cafe or walks in the park.  When a man would fly to me it would be important that we have already discussed all these manly things he has to say to me and made sure we had no issues between us before he wasted his money, his time and my time before he flew to me and be told...no.

I asked you one night during a talk, do men know how to write a love letter to a lady anymore? You laughed a little and said I have no idea. She said when a man cares for and wants to win a lady's heart he needs to sit down and write her a love letter and tell her these things...your thoughts on this? All I could say was I understand your words and thoughts. She told me Bleau that is part of romancing a lady.
The next morning she received a letter from me as the best I could do after so many years of not writing a love letter to a lady. From then on she's called me my Bleau and signs all her letters in a special way that tells me that love letter to her is helping to start bringing closure to some things in her life she wanted and needs.
I think you also have to remember to write more of those letters to a lady and keep giving her the faith that you are serious about her and not just another ye haw I jump on the plane and go prove myself to you sitting on the park bench, in a cafe or walks in the park kind of guy.
She also made the comment to me that I doubt most of the younger girls now know what romance and love letters are and most men after those girls will probably have a lot of headaches with her.

Well, today I was told by my translator friend Galina that she, my 3 daughters and my lady in Ukraine had an interesting and very positive conversation together on the phone today. The first thing out of my mind was who paid for the phone call. She laughed and said...from this phone on this desk here in your home office with your 16 year old sitting with me and your other two daughters in their offices. Anything else you would like to say Bleau and laughed.

I hope all you guys and gals are having a safe and blessed week

Bleau

[chivo]

I hope all you guys and gals are having a safe and blessed week

Thanks, carry on soldier!

[Muzh]

OMG!

Bleau, you found my wife's twin sister!

THIS is what I've been saying for as long I've been writing on these fora. This exact same sentiment a real and serious woman would have towards a potential mate.

<snipped some wonderful advice>

She also made the comment to me that I doubt most of the younger girls now know what romance and love letters are and most men after those girls will probably have a lot of headaches with her.

You have been blessed my friend.

[Kineo]

Holy Prostate Batman, that's a proctological probing of prolific profundity!  

Man I can not stop laughing! Everytime I read it I crackup.