First Kiss

[Oosik]

Someone was posting about the first date kiss. This is not really russian tradition. I wondered if anyone noticed what first date kiss traditions/expectations were like? I imagine it would be different for WOVO, WMVM and Intro-letter, visit few.

I have to say I've used very smooth lines and lead-ins, as well as the "drunken grope":P

[KenC]

The first kiss with my wife was a trip.  She was dropping me off at my apartment in a cab.  She wouldn't allow me to kiss her on the street in front of the cabbie!  Instead she walked me to inside the outer door to the apartment building before allowing me to kiss her.  Even though my apartment was no where near her home, she explained that "no good girl" would let her man kiss her in public.

KenC

[al-c]

Another valuable Russian culture lesson.

I learned another one when I was in Russia for the first time and told by the interpreter to "hold the lady's hand", something that would get you smacked if you tried it here.

 

[Oosik]

That's interesting Al, I was told that hand or arm holding meant you were an item. Maybe the interpreter was saying that she liked you and you should go for it.

In PK I had explained to my date that I understood that hand-holding, arm holding was like we are an item. I told her it was strange to walk by someone so far and not take her arm. I also told her about the US custom of the first-date kiss, and that I understood that things would be different there.

End result was that I had clearly communicated to her how she could signal me, and so walking home from our date, she took my arm, which gave me the courage to kiss her, which happened very nicely!!!

[Jooky]

So many cultural differences.

I've seen plenty of young Russian couples kissing in public. It doesn't seem to phase anyone. Times are changing.

Of course some women don't want to show in public who they're kissing in private.

That's understandable. :kissing:

"hold the lady's hand", something that would get you smacked if you tried it here.


I'll stay away from wherever you're from. There's plenting of hand holding and no smacking going on in California, even in Berkeley, capital city of "liberated" women.

I'm glad I never learned the "no kiss on the first date" and the "no good girl kisses her man in public" Russian rules. What I have learned is that, like in any other country, what you learn from one woman does not necessarily apply to all or even most women. There really aren't any rules.

If you want to kiss on the first date, go ahead. If a woman refuses, that's a personal decision, not a cultural one.

[Goldtop]

My first kiss was about like any first date kiss. However the first time I slapped her on the butt - now that was different.:hairraising:

[al-c]

I've never experienced any resistance from a RW for hand-holding, right from the start.  It seems like they expect it.  But from an AW, it takes 3 or 4 dates before we can get that far.

However, resistance to kissing in public was quite formidable.  In private was a totally different story.  Now that I see it in black and white, it all makes sense to me.

 

[KenC]

Jooky,

I'm glad I never learned the "no kiss on the first date" and the "no good girl kisses her man in public" Russian rules. What I have learned is that, like in any other country, what you learn from one woman does not necessarily apply to all or even most women. There really aren't any rules

As a matter of clarification, no one said they were "rules."  Just an example of a personal experience.

KenC

[Jooky]

I said there were rules! Then I said there weren't any.

Seriously, I know your intention is just to post your experience, but many guys reading these boards, especially those that don't post, read a thread like this and think to themselves:

1. No kissing on the first date.

2. No kissing in public. If a girl kisses me in public, she's not good. Red flag.

3. Must hold hands right away.

Or they'll read other nonsense such as the "third date sex" rule, which comes I believe from some Elena's model's booklet.

You can find a woman who'll hop into bed with you the first night, or want you to wait until marriage. You can find a woman who likes to grasp your arm, or you can find a woman who thinks holding hands is for children.

When it comes to these things, every woman is individual, even in Russia.

 

[TigerPaws]

[color="#0000ff"][size="4"]Jooky,[/size][/color]   [color="#0000ff"][size="4"] Maybe the term guidelines would be  better?[/size][/color]

[Oosik]

I was hoping we could share first kiss stories, to help guys get a feel for how things went. I was curious if the experiences would lend us to think that this subject was the same all over, or if there were different trends.

[Jooky]

Ok, I had a first kiss an the second day of a very extended first date.

A few minutes after entering a Russian sauna she pops out of the changing room wearing nothing but her black panties. Her cute girl friends are completely naked.

My first kiss was under a sauna shower with a nearly naked dripping wet Russian beauty.

Now that should be a Russian tradition! (and in some places in Siberia, I hear it is).

(and TigerPaws is wondering why I would go to Russia)

[KenC]

Jooky,

My first kiss was under a sauna shower with a nearly naked dripping wet Russian beauty.

Now that should be a Russian tradition

No, that should be a rule!:clapping:

KenC

[al-c]

You can find a woman who'll hop into bed with you the first night.

 

Yeah, I know.  Had one of those too.  Lots of fun, for sure, but it did not lead to any chance of a serious relationship.

 

 

[Albert]

Women are  women the world over.  There are no rules.  Some do and some don't.  Some do it (it can be anything) quickly and some do it never.

Even concerning tendencies, it would be dangerous to claim such.

But, in general, FSU gals do seem a bit reluctant for the public kissing and other terms of endearment, except for walking hand in hand or hand in arm.

On my first trips to a particular city, I generally meet 10-15 gals.  The very first trip, I met each gal with a single armed hug and a kiss on cheek.  Most seemed to sort of pull away, so subsequently I stopped trying that.  Later however, a few gals gave me kiss on cheek at first meeting.  So who knows.

One interesting point is the slap on the a$$.  When I first did this in FSU several years ago (this was after first sex) the gal told me I shouldn't do it.   We were walking on a beach and no one was really very close to us.  She didn't speak much English, so later when we were with her girlfriend who spoke more English, I brought this up.  After some gabbing back and forth, the girlfriend told me that my gal said that slap on a$$ meant that you owned (sort of) the gal and when you did it in public, you were announcing this 'owning aspect' to everyone so that other guys would stay away.  I said, "well that's good."  They both laughed and said: "yes, for you, but not for her."  The girlfriend went on to tell me that she didn't know this rule until my gal told her.

With a second gal, I gave her slap on a$$ in apartment as she was walking past.  She smiled and turned around to come back and then slapped me on a$$.

Then another time more recently, I slapped a gal on a$$ when she was on the way to the shower.  She and I had been living together (and doing everything under the sun) for about 6 days already.  She had been married for about 13 years.  She looked at me with quite a shocked look on her face and said: "I don't let anybody do that."   So I explained to her that I do that all the time.  She said, "well OK, but not in public then."  Subsequently she seemed to sort of come to like it.

[Oosik]

My ex(AW) liked the butt slapping a lot, and so have the U/RW that I've had the nerve to do it to. 2 of the three were suprised by it, one of them was shocked and never had her butt slapped before, but liked it enough to ask me to do it some more. I must say, it is a pretty big turn on when a woman asks you to slap her a$$ or tells you that you can do it when you want.

[Goldtop]

My ex(AW) liked the butt slapping a lot, and so have the U/RW that I've had the nerve to do it to. 2 of the three were suprised by it, one of them was shocked and never had her butt slapped before, but liked it enough to ask me to do it some more. I must say, it is a pretty big turn on when a woman asks you to slap her a$$ or tells you that you can do it when you want.

I was told it was disrespectful and RM didn't do it. I had to explain the American point of view on butt slapping. Now she allows me an affectionate slap every now and then.