Trip to Odessa...

[Muzh]

I should have written "You LIKELY are making excuses for her." Me bad. Or do you believe somehow that it is standard for women to only go on dates accompanied by friends?

Misha, much better. To answer your question, I don't know. That I believe it is a wise move? Yes.

[Misha]

Misha, much better. To answer your question, I don't know. That I believe it is a wise move? Yes.

So you believe it is a wise move for a woman to go on a date with friends?

[JP5380]

I have known American women who wanted to go on a "group date" the first time.  I do not find this unusual, especially when two people do not know each other very well (i.e. they met on the internet).  I would also find it perfectly normal for a woman to meet alone in a public place the first time.  I think it just depends on the woman and her comfort level.

[Faux Pas]

IMHO, a chaperoned friend date shouldn't occur after the first date. Otherwise, something is amiss

[JP5380]

IMHO, a chaperoned friend date shouldn't occur after the first date. Otherwise, something is amiss

Yes, I agree...

[Misha]

IMHO, a chaperoned friend date shouldn't occur after the first date. Otherwise, something is amiss

Yes, and if a woman does not need an interpreter she will understand that quite often couples click on the first date. Why bring a friend to a coffee date or lunch when he will be forced to focus on both women if he is polite. I understand that teenagers go out as groups, but adults ?!?

[Daveman]

Yes, and if a woman does not need an interpreter she will understand that quite often couples click on the first date. Why bring a friend to a coffee date or lunch when he will be forced to focus on both women if he is polite horny. I understand that teenagers go out as groups, but adults ?!?

I dunno guys, sounds kinda interesting.     I've lived such a sheltered FSU life.. no "doubles", no knocks on the door in the middle of the night, no flat owner showing me a menu of delights (I still have some vivid dreams over that one, Gator)...


Seriously, I would concede a first date to meet with her and her friend (though I have never had that particular request... perhaps I should have used the ole "sock trick" in my photos) as a precautionary measure - especially if it's the first time she met a foreigner, whatever.  However, to state flatly up front "I will not be alone with you" during communication strikes me, as Bob Ueker would phrase it, "juuuuuuuuuust a bit outside"...


Rationalization can be made for anything, and yeah, sometimes fact is stranger than fiction, but unless you met her at UkrainianConventGirlsAreCurious.com, it does seem juuuuuust a bit outside the norm...

[JP5380]

to state flatly up front "I will not be alone with you" during communication strikes me, as Bob Ueker would phrase it, "juuuuuuuuuust a bit outside"...

I will admit, that was a bit of an over statement on my part.  But yes, it was clear that she wanted her friend with us most of the time...

but unless you met her at UkrainianConventGirlsAreCurious.com, it does seem juuuuuust a bit outside the norm...

To be honest, that's not too far from the truth.  She was one of the more old-fashioned and religious girls I have ever met.  So I thought maybe this was just part of her "traditional" beliefs.  Oh well, apparently a blunder on my part.  I don't know guys, I saw a good person.  So I gave it a shot..

[Faux Pas]

To be honest, that's not too far from the truth.  She was one of the more old-fashioned and religious girls I have ever met.  So I thought maybe this was just part of her "traditional" beliefs.  Oh well, apparently a blunder on my part.  I don't know guys, I saw a good person.  So I gave it a shot..

Nothing to explain away or be ashamed of. It is what it is. You met her, nobody else here did. You know more of what she was/is than anyone. However, for future reference and not just FSUW but, any woman isn't very interested in you, if she needs someone else around.

[Misha]

So I thought maybe this was just part of her "traditional" beliefs.  Oh well, apparently a blunder on my part.  I don't know guys, I saw a good person.  So I gave it a shot..

A lesson learned and it is always best to give something a shot    However, take the traditional hype with a really big chunk of salt...

[Daveman]

I will admit, that was a bit of an over statement on my part.  But yes, it was clear that she wanted her friend with us most of the time...

To be honest, that's not too far from the truth.  She was one of the more old-fashioned and religious girls I have ever met.  So I thought maybe this was just part of her "traditional" beliefs.  Oh well, apparently a blunder on my part.  I don't know guys, I saw a good person.  So I gave it a shot..

Indeed, the religious aspect could very well be the real deal here.  As with anywhere, there are some very religious ladies there, most are not overly so, but there are definitely some (and especially so the farther west you travel). I don't think anyone has said she isn't a good person... just that there is an odd aspect to the story as presented...  as FP says... nothing at all to be ashamed of at all - heck, you got a *great* experience out of this and are in a better position to set yourself up for success - we are just putting in comments from our own personal experiences which you simply take for what they are worth to you...

A lesson learned and it is always best to give something a shot    However, take the traditional hype with a really big chunk of salt...

Go ahead, say that one again..

[Misha]

Indeed, the religious aspect could very well be the real deal here.

Sure, but the extremely religious and traditional Russian Orthodox women that I know would be the last ones to be on a dating site, let alone on a dating site for foreigners 

[Jumper]

 Glad you took the good with the so-so, and have a learning attitude about the experience.
You found someone you clicked on-line with , and went to see them!! 
 It's the chance  everyone takes,if they get the gumption to get on the plane.
Percentage wise you are one of the few to follow through.. Sounds like her friend respected you for that at the very least and genuinely cared that you had a pleasant visit.
 
As far as odds, like dating someone that young,
it seems a lot of Odessa tales go along this path..
odds seem, well ,odd ,in that city in particular..
coupled with anyone sub 25, they seem down right dismal.
 
This just seems a case of what seemed to be a *click* in skype , fizzled face to face,
and just like anyone meeting a random person online,
 even in their home city, its pretty long odds that ultimately they would hit it off long term in person.
 
Flying overseas just doesn't change the dynamic..
and it's good you kept expectations minimal until after meeting.
 
Good luck in the future!