something new

[seekingwife]

hi all, im here looking for sound advice for finding a foreign wife. to make things a bit blunt, i am a single veteran, disabled drawing a bit over $1200  a month in pension. currently i am in business school liquidating my GI Bill benefits. i am single, have no kids, and zero debt (kinda hard to do nowadays). i dont really own much here (car, few guns) and am not really attached to anything. i live within my means here in the us but i am looking to see more of the world. im not much to look at, although i am quite intelligent. i am a bit lazy nowadays because of injuries sustained. i may be willing to relocate from the us if it is grossly beneficial for me. i will be 40 next year, have had a couple of relationships but nothing that had ever gotten serious and am giving up on american girls. as i refuse to work myself to death to support all of the bs they seem to require or on the other end have one that is completely self sufficient, attached to a career and never home.  neither of these do i want. i am also not a fan of going into one of these relationships with someone elses kids especially if it is still bitter ( those with experience with this understand fully what i am talking about) and all of the underlying issues that seem to revolve in a never ending vicious circle. i want quiet, obedient, semi-conservative, educated, good natured and above HONEST!, i hate having any form of underhandedness in a relationship of any type (another reason i am strongly considring another country). the woman i marry will be eligible for full entitlement to my benefits upon my death as long as she does not remarry (i dont know if this is a factor but im putting it out there anyways). i am looking for a wife that will be happy with 1 child and not moving the family in as well (not into having the zoo experience at home). if this exists please do tell.

[Donna_Pedro]

-disabled
drawing a bit over $1200  a month in pension. .
- i dont really own much here (car, few guns)
 -injuries sustained.

I believe that in order to file a fiance (spouse) visa,  you are supposed to meet  minimum income requirements, which you do not.  Also, if memory serves, one of the requirements is to meet a girl in person, which means a trip to her country. Just the ticket to fly to Russia (Ukraine) costs somewhere between $1000 and $2000. And even if you manage to somehow pass all these requirements and actually bring a foreign woman to US, how are you going to support her?  Sorry, no offense, I do not believe you can afford the process. Relocation to Russia (Ukraine, etc) also rises too many problems, the main one being - what about medical care?? 

[brave girl]

i want quiet, obedient,

Please, get the animal pet!
Do not disturb nice Russian girls. 
 
brave girl

[seekingwife]

ok maybe i overstated the quiet obedient thing, maybe the words i was looking for was reserved and rational. as far as the income, it is a guaranteed income i get in addition to any and all other money i might make.
i know in some countries i have visited so far they are very xenophobic when it comes to foreigners and working in their country. costa rica is a shining example of this.

[acrzybear]

$1200 a month is good supplemental income, but as primary income-fuggaaboutit.
Let's say you meet the woman of your dreams and this $1200 a month  is all you have at the moment. You managed to save up enough money and actually traveled to meet her in another country and then you decide to go through the K-1 process
I-130 filing fee is $340.00
Once that is approved she needs a medical certificate Usually around $100.00
I-751  Petition to Remove Conditions on Residence - Fee $505.00  biometrics  $85.00
I-765  Application for Employment Authorization - $380.00
N-600 Application for Certificate of Citizenship- $600.00
I am sure there are other fees to the governent involved, I don't recall at the moment.
And once she arrives in the U.S, she will need to buy clothes, and replace other things that she left behind to be with you. 
This is a very expensive and time consuming endeavor, don't take it lightly
 
 

[Chicagoguy]

And I always like to add: Consider her medical expenses if you have no work coverage for her.

[Donna_Pedro]

as far as the income, it is a guaranteed income i get in addition to any and all other money i might make.

Well, as I said earlier, in order to file for a fiance visa you need to provide INS with  your last 2 (3??) years tax returns. If you dont make enough money (I dont remember the exact amount, but its definatly much larger than $14400), you can not file. And if you have not visited your girl in person - you can not file either. Consider the filing fees  acrzybear is talking about.  Its best to wait until you are better financially situated.

[seekingwife]

thx for all of the info it is much appreciated. the 1200 is supplemental income and as far as the medical care it is nothing as i have full VA coverage. like i said above i am in school and i know this process will take some time but i got 2-3 more years before i am out of school and i figure by then i will have a really good idea by the time i get to it.

[ML]

Hate to burst your bubble in another respect . . . but women are women mostly the world around.

There are only some slight differences from region to region, and some of the differences may not go the way you want.

For the Eastern European  women, there is are basically only two aspects that may appeal to you.  One, you can 'trade up' with respect to several variables such as education, facial looks, and age (in this case a trade down).  By trade up, I mean that you can attract an Eastern European woman that you could not attract if she were a western woman.  Note:  The Eastern European women are not better looking or more educated than western women in general, but you can trade up along the spectrum.

The second aspect that appeals to most men is that the Eastern European women are generally more slender than western women in each age group.

But note that if you read some of Donna's comments in other threads, it isn't a given than an Eastern European woman will plan to stay slender once she is living in the USA.

And don't buy into any agency BS that Eastern European women are more family oriented, kinder, more loyal, less materialistic, more honest, less career oriented, etc., etc., than Western women. Some may be, some may not be.

[Donna_Pedro]

But note that if you read some of Donna's comments in other threads, it isn't a given than an Eastern European woman will plan to stay slender once she is living in the USA.

This is not entirely correct. If you read some of the Donna's comments in other threads, it becomes apparent to you, that  EEW will eventually adjust to both local life style and mentality, and not always in the ways you expect. Donna, for example, also proclaimed on multiple occasions earlier that she was not going to ever have a career, but it tuned out that she had one and enjoyed it too. In general if you bring what initially looks like  a slim, nice, obedient  rational and reserved woman that does not want to have a career, it does not necessarily mean she will stay this way.

[veritas]

seekingwife -- I just re-read your original post, and I'm wondering what the heck
YOU have to offer to HER???  Other than being "quite intelligent", that is -- which
is hardly evident in your writing ... Seems to me that your attitude is all wrong for
this endeavor ...

Kevin

[Ade]

SeekingWife, in the blunt words of my wife, "I doubt you will find someone from Russia or Ukraine and if you can find someone abroad, it will most likely be because she is desperate."

My thoughts are similar I guess. You have a disability? You don't say what. FSUW in general don't look upon disabilities favourably even if they were obtained in war. And if you have mobility issues, the FSU is not an ideal place to think about relocating to as they rarely make accommodation for disabilities over there.

The money thing will be an issue for a whole host of reasons. Ignoring the legal minimum requirements for a minute, I'm sure Misha will be along soon to tell you that you can support a family on a shoestring but seriously, just being able afford enough trips there to get to know someone properly is very expensive. Add to that vacation time; you're going to start work after you finished business school, right? How much vacation time will you be getting that first few years? Do you honestly see this as being practical for you in the near term?

Then there is your requirements in a mate; you want someone passive and submissive and educated, not a stay at home but not a career woman either. Really? It's just not going to happen.

Or I should say, it's unlikely that this is going to happen in the FSU. Perhaps in the Philipines.

[Faux Pas]

seekingwife


Welcome to RWD!


Just a few observations from your opening post and I suppose reinforcement of several posts here.  This endeavor is quite expensive and no guarantees. Unless you've squirreled away a nest egg, you can't do it on $1200 a month and maintain any kind of lifestyle.


You didn't mention your disability but, the nature of it could (or not) largely affect your success or lack of it. Your mobility as mentioned is also a major factor.


Your requirements of a possible wife are quite extensive and given your inabilities financially and (or not) physical disabilities, are those requirements realistic?


The websites and marriage agencies lead one to believe that finding your perfect FSU bride is as easy as picking fruit from a tree. It isn't and in fact it is quite difficult and expensive. Most of the old married bastards wouldn't recommend it to others.


With that said, it can be done as many can attest. However, nothing you've mention about yourself suggests that you would be successful at it. Again, you didn't mention your type of disability or your earning power after you finish school, two very important points. If you were a beautiful, educated able-bodied woman, would you be attracted to you? Most all relationships are a two way street no matter the basis of the relationship. They have to work and meet the needs of both parties or it ceases to be a relationship.


Good Luck!

[Turboguy]

When I first read your post the word obedient made me laugh.   In an AM-RW marriage the only obedient one is likely to be the husband.  You did change that which was good.  For an obedient wife I think you made a wrong turn back at the Sunoco station and should have gone west and not east.  You might find an obedient wife in Asia but not the FSU.   That out of the way I will touch on a few other things.
 
Your income is a problem.  It won't take much of a search to find threads where guys who were making $ 40,000 a year were told they couldn't afford it.  Personally I never totally agreed with that and did think other things come into play.   I will go along with the others and since you haven't discussed your disability we don't know how to factor that in.  It could be a factor, maybe even a big one. 
 
The thing that gives a glimmer of hope is that you are in school and possibly after you get out may be qualified for a good job which would let you afford it.  One other fact that I will add.  I believe someone mentioned the minimum amount you must make to do a K-1.  It is 125% of the poverty level.  I haven't looked to see what that was for a while but it is more than you are making right now.  There are ways around that however.  The most used is a sponsor.  If you have parents or siblings that would pledge support then that requirement is waved.  Other wise I would suggest putting this in low gear until you have graduated and found a job.  You could spend the time in between learning more about how to do it effectively by particiapting here.
 
I don't see your situation as hopeless but I think you need to work on getting your life in order which you are doing.  FSU women are not obedient but they many are really wonderful and if you can find a good one you will never regret it.  It is not an easy process and isn't cheap.  I do wish you luck and hope it all works out for you.

[acrzybear]

 

When I first read your post the word obedient made me laugh.   In an AM-RW marriage the only obedient one is likely to be the husband.

TG- Very true-  My wife said my training is coming along nicely and will continue when she arrives here in a few days-lol
 

[Donna_Pedro]

TG- Very true-  My wife said my training is coming along nicely and will continue when she arrives here in a few days-lol

This is funny, the way she puts it.  My husband  has gone a long way since he came to see me in Moscow, looking, the way I put it, as a stray dog. Now his fur is shiny and well groomed and he is trained to respond to commands in 2 languages ( commands in Russian only  sex or food related so far, but we are getting there slowly but surely.)

[acrzybear]

This is funny, the way she puts it.  My husband  has gone a long way since he came to see me in Moscow, looking, the way I put it, as a stray dog. Now his fur is shiny and well groomed and he is trained to respond to commands in 2 languages ( commands in Russian only  sex or food related so far, but we are getting there slowly but surely.)

Donna
I was talking to my wife on Skype earlier today and I was showing her some of the house decorations I have prepared for her permanent arrival on the 29th and she made the training comment-lol  At work I am in charge of 15-20 type A personalities and can make life or death decisions without any problem, yet according to my wife I need help getting dressed.  I will have to admit that so far she has been right more often then not, as I have improved my wardrobe and I am getting into better shape. I just may have to keep her around for 30 or 40 years     

[JR]

Fix yourself first young grasshopper)) You're perfect for believing all the hype about RW vs AW. Women are made from the same mold, as are men. Drop a RW into America and they begin to become Americanized, it's normal and natural. You think a RW can't be bitter or have a child out of wedlock? You think they can't be emotionally stressed by their cirumstances? Think again. Most of your idealization of the RW is based upon ingornace and a dislike for what you see around you.
Anyway, welcome and good luck ))