Belated Trip Report

[Freebird]

Hello to all –

This is my first post on RWD although I've been reading it with a keen interest since early December.  I've now decided to post for several reasons.  Mainly because I find the board useful and I enjoy the diverse opinions expressed here.  And, they are diverse which I find to be the extremely helpful when trying to see all sides of an issue, situation or story.  I have also enjoyed seeing both sides of the coin with input from the Russian ladies who post here, such as Rose.  I love Rose's assertiveness and perspective on controversial issues; she seems like a smart lady.  The second reason I've decided to post is that I am soon headed for Ukraine in search of a mate as many of you have already done, and I want to share my thought processes, approaches, observations and results.  I debated placing this post in Starting Out, but it sounded more like a trip report than anything else, so I decided to post here.  Please let me know if belongs elsewhere.

For those who are curious, I'll write briefly about myself.  I just turned 59 and have been widowed for several years.  You may have seen me logged into RWD as Freebird, which I consider myself to be.  I live in the mountains behind Boulder, Colorado.  I'm semi retired and work as a project management consultant for some of the larger defense contractors whenever they have a need.  Although I try to keep work down to a few months a year, I usually wind up working much more than I want.  I like to have plenty time for skiing, dirt biking, traveling and such.

This whole thing (for lack of a better term) started for me last October when an American friend of mine, whom I met while working on Johnston Island, invited me to Kiev for New Year's.  His name is John and he works in Chad, Africa but keeps an apartment in Kiev since he works 4 weeks on and 4 weeks off.  Along with his invite, he sent a picture of a very lovely lady from Kherson, Vika, and offered for her to be my New Year's date.  Well, I replied to John that I wasn't really looking for a partner, but no harm in having a great time over the holidays in Kiev, especially with a nice looking lady.  At the time I didn't understand why a 47 year old lady would be interested in me, but we exchanged some general info emails plus and few pictures and soon I was agreeable to the trip.

Being clueless, I talked with several of my friends about this trip which led me to RWD.  I spent hours upon hours reading, mostly trying to figure out the acronyms.  But I soon began to develop a visual image of what lied ahead.  I must say that the image I develop from reading RWD, talking with my friends and corresponding with Vika was nothing compared to being there.  I often read on RWD that the advice given to many men was to go there.  I found that to be profoundly true. 

Vika met me at the airport.  As I had said earlier she is nice looking lady and as I found out over the next 10 days, she was also a very nice and pleasant person.  Since neither Vika nor I were from Kiev, John put us together in a flat where we had some time to get to know one another.  Even though I was in a very pleasant situation, I had not decided that I was in the market for a serious, long term relationship, especially with someone who lived such a long distance.  So, I approached it that way; have fun and then go home.

Over the next 10 days, I had a lot of fun.  Not only did I have Vika as a constant companion, I also met other women just in the course of normal socialization.  I was amazed at the abundance of intelligent and attractive women who were pleasant as well as approachable – something to which I certainly was not accustomed.  Vika and I double dated, went to parties, toured, partied in the middle of town, shopped and partied even more.  What a great time!

As Vika and I became more familiar and comfortable with each other, both of us started developing feelings.  She clearly wanted a serious long term relationship, but my feelings were developing in the opposite direction.  Even though someday she will make someone a great partner, I just didn't think she was the right person for me.  It was during this 10 day period that I recalled the advice I often read on RWD about getting to know someone before launching off into a committed relationship.  Vika accompanied me to the airport when it was time for my departure and I felt badly that things didn't work out for her.  I have a fondness for Vika, but it will never go beyond that.  We exchanged a couple of emails since my return to America, but she has realized that it is time for her to let go and we haven't corresponded in quite a while.

Well, this brief trip to Kiev wasn't the end of my story, it is just the beginning.  From last October when I said I wasn't looking for a mate, until now, I've seen the possibilities and decided to pursue them.  Although at the time I didn't realize it, my trip and subsequent meeting with Vika was somewhat analogous to WOVO.  Now, through the guidance of Jack Bragg I'm embarking upon a WMVM journey.  Although I consider myself a serially monogomous person, I see the benefit in the WMVM approach.  I'll be leaving for Kiev in less than two weeks for a month-long trip.  Hopefully the first of several trips this year.  And it's from this trip that I hope to have many posts that are informative and interesting.  Needless to say, I'm also hoping success for myself, but I want to share the ride. 

Jim

[BillyB]

Let me be the first to welcome you Freebird. For those that know Freebird from the other forum, they'd probably agree with me that Freebird's trip reports are some of the more interesting reads. Keep in cuming Freebird.

[Freebird]

Hi Billy -

Interesting.  There must be another Freebird somewhere.  I've never been on any other board - yesterday was my first post anywhere.

Jim

[BC]

Jim,

Welcome!  Another 'Freebird' is posting at RWG.

Sounds like you have your head on straight with the greatest advantage of all on your side.. time.

I enjoy your writing style and look forward to hearing more about your adventures.

'Fire in the hole!'

[catzenmouse]

Freebird,

 I'll third that welcome to RWD! I hope that you have a wonderful trip. If you have time and get a chance it would be great to hear your impressions while you are there. Always interesting to hear different opinions of the city and country.

Ken

[BillyB]

My mistake Freebird. There is another Freebird out there who is known to post a lot of trip reports in another Russian woman's forum. What a coincidence.

[Bruce]

A great name and a great song!  Welcome aboard.  I look forward to reading your trip report.  Good luck in Ukraine.  Meet many and whittle them down.  It may work out this trip - or on a subsequent trip.  You'll have a great time.

[KenC]

Freebird,
Welcome.  Nice story and congratulations on having your head on straight.  I have seen too many guys explore their options for years without ever actually taking a trip over.  I think you are doing things the right way.  Don't think of your trip as a "wife hunting" trip but rather as a trip to meet many women with which to potentially pursue a relationship.  Again too many guys put the cart way before the horse in this process.  Go have fun, meet a lot of ladies and if you find a few that suite your fancy go back and get to know them better.  Above all else, enjoy yourself!  I will wish you good luck, but for some reason, I don't think you will need it.
KenC
(You also did well to hook up with Jack)

[Admin]

Hi Jim,

Welcome to RWD and thanks for sharing your story. Like Ken, it sounds like you have your head on straight, and I would think you will probably be successful. Your judgment about people seems on-track, based on your observations and comments about rose. She has certainly been a valued contributor here, and you seem to have noticed her well-balanced and thought-filled responses.

Please check in while you are overseas - and let us all know how things are going for you.

Regards,

- Dan

[tim 360]

Welcome aboard Freebird.  You seem very level-headed and it will be a pleasure to read your reports. 

[PeeWee]

This has been quite a day. I have found three new heros all in one day. Freebird I wish you luck, lad. Report back so that I can have hope.

Peewee

[Jester]

Hi, are you the Jim I just met in the Kharkiv Hotel at the weekend, if so thanks for the tip of looking at this website, hope you Randy, Neil & Andy are all well. I arrived home safely in the uk after an interesting weekend!!! I will be going back to the Ukraine.

Good Luck

Nigel