BODY LANGUAGE

[SANDRO43]

Most of you must be resigned by now to my keen interest in all matters related to language .

Trusting in your forbearance, I'm therefore opening for discussion and further contributions this new thread on a particular non-verbal subcategory, more directly useful when dealing with women in general, especially in the initial phases: "Body language is a factor in human courtship, a subconscious or subtle method of communication between potential mates." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_language).

Basically, it covers:
- Facial expression
- Gestures
- Posture

You can read in the above link their more widely known aspects. I'd like to consider a few of the usually lesser known. 

Facial expression: I'll let you discover a very significant aspect by yourselves, when you examine the two attached photos of the same girl and decide which one you find more appealing.

Gestures: a woman quickly touching/rearranging her hair when in your company is considered a significantly-positive sign: she's checking if she's at her current best for you, and that's a compliment .

Posture: a scene that always comes to my mind in this connection occurred in a local restaurant. A young couple was sitting at a table, the man slouched back in his seat with a bored/noncommittal expression, the woman leaning forward with her elbows on the table, arms raised vertically to support her chin on her clasped hands, and eager expression on her face. She was probably trying, unsuccessfully, to convince him of something (I was not close enough to eavesdrop ).

This episode touches on another angle: proxemics, a term "introduced by anthropologist Edward T. Hall in 1959 to describe set measurable distances between people as they interact." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Proxemics), and covering another interesting facet of body language. 

How close will a FSUW stand to you/let you stand to her ?

Bear in mind that this is culture-related: southern people stand closer together than northern people (apparently, ambient temperature is not a significant consideration).   

[IAmZon]

excellent topic ...

In the first photo, the subject is establishing direct eye contact.

Yes, non verbal communication is more telling in the initial phases of human interaction than verbal. Facial Gestures; Posture are very telling.  Any non verbal message that exhibits excitement, eagerness, or concern to attract are to be noted by a potential suitor.  For example the speed of speech may indicate excitement.

Just as nonverbal signs that exhibit boredom, or lack of interest.

Equally important to reading nonverbal communication is giving it. It is good advise to men who travel half way around the world to be aware and control.  OBVIOUSLY, one is overly excited .... otherwise one would have stayed home to watch TV in his pajamas.  Keep this in check.

How often have you been on a date with a women you REALLY liked and could not control your hands - they seemed to move by themselves - or, you were uncommonly fidgety?  Not good signs.

A very interesting point about nonverbal communication is that it is subconsciously understood by the other, REGARDLESS OF LANGUAGE.  These are the visual cues that result internal impression - the in turn ons and turn offs.

[BillyB]

I'll go for pic number one. Do I win a prize? Is pic #2's lighter skin and enlarged pubils a good sign or bad?

One problem when men go on dates with ladies is that they do not observe body language. They are clueless to how the lady feels about them. They just expect things to end happily ever after with no understanding they have to actually find the right person to get there.

Women are better at understanding body language than men. Sometimes when walking down the street, my fiancee, without moving her head, will extend her fingers on her hand my way. small movement but I always grab her hand when I see her move that way. She'll fix my collar, pick lint off my clothes and doesn't reject me when I put my arm around her or hold her hand.

Once I was at a restaraunt eating alone and a waitress was talking and standing closer to me more than she does other customers and occasionally she'd put her hand on my shoulder when we talked about something very interesting or funny. She was very friendly and seemed to be a good woman. If I wasn't engaged, I was sure I could've gotten her number if I asked.

[BC]

Nr 2 is the one.. It's all in the pupils..

With wide pupils she is either showing interest or drugged. 

Either way you will probably get 'lucky'.

[Gator]

Dilated pupils reveal that she is looking at something desirable.  Hopefully it is you and not the man standing behind you.

Or did the photographer forget to set flash to red eye and later corrected?  Personally, when a woman has eyes the color of robin's eggs, I prefer the smaller pupils.

I tend to subconsciously receive all signals in a collective, unified, Gestalt manner without paying much attention to any particular one.  Over the years I have noticed that these are good signs:  long eye contact if not gazing, feet apart, head arched, touching the hair, and palms up.  The one I really like is when she starts touching if not stroking me.  Only an eunuch could miss that one.

[BC]

Personally, when a woman has eyes the color of robin's eggs, I prefer the smaller pupils.

..add raven black hair and my knees go weak.

(Spain)

[SANDRO43]

With wide pupils she is either showing interest or drugged.

Correct. While most other body language signs are the result of semi-conscious/subconscious stimuli mediated by the voluntary nervous system, and therefore can be controlled to some extent with training and concentration, pupil dilation cannot, being controlled by the autonomic nervous system:

The autonomic nervous system (ANS) (or visceral nervous system) is the part of the peripheral nervous system that acts as a control system, maintaining homeostasis in the body. These maintenance activities are primarily performed without conscious control or sensation. The ANS has far reaching effects, including: heart rate, digestion, respiration rate, salivation, perspiration, diameter of the pupils, micturition, and sexual arousal.

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autonomic_nervous_system#Sympathetic_nervous_system)
It's a reflexive adaptation for better image acquisition, either when ambient light is insufficient and/or when the image is very interesting .

As BC put it, barring atropine (or worse): 

Either way you will probably get 'lucky'.

I was reproducing here the results of a study published in the Scientific American many years ago .

[SANDRO43]

..add raven black hair and my knees go weak (Spain)

Some decent examples outside Spain, too .

[SANDRO43]

Or did the photographer forget to set flash to red eye and later corrected?

Phil, Face 1 is the original photo, Face 2 is my clumsy retouch for larger pupils .

[BillyB]

Dilated pupils reveal that she is looking at something desirable. 

I search for info on the subject and dialated pupils can happen when one fears something they're looking at besides being interested in somebody. I'm sure there dialated pupils happens with an array of emotions. Now all a guy has to do when he sees a woman with dialated pubils is figure out if it's time to make his move or figure out if she's going to run away from you because she's scared.

[IAmZon]

Wow,

With guys like us ... women really don't stand a chance:)

[SANDRO43]

I search for info on the subject and dialated pupils can happen when one fears something they're looking at besides being interested in somebody.

Either way, it's a telling sign in a courtship .

when he sees a woman with dialated pubils

I was only considering normal face-to-face encounters, not telephone sado-masochism, though that might open an interesting new area of investigation .

[2tallbill]

Warning recycled joke alert!!!!
Warning recycled joke alert!!!!

[SANDRO43]

... and, as someone recalled in another thread, heading for the shower is another VERY significant sign concerning FSUW, though I'm not sure if it can be strictly classified as "body language" (as its likely aftermath could ).

[2tallbill]

Most of you must be resigned by now to my keen interest in all matters related to language .

How close will a FSUW stand to you/let you stand to her ?

Bear in mind that this is culture-related: southern people stand closer together than northern people (apparently, ambient temperature is not a significant consideration).   

[2tallbill]

Highly perceptive men such as myself can read Ms Aniston's
body language and tell that it's cold outside

[ML]

But she is inside a building of some sort.

[SANDRO43]

But she is inside a building of some sort.

Draft from an open window ?

[2tallbill]

But she is inside a building of some sort.

She either just came inside or she's simply glad to see me again.

[ML]

Yet another possibility (noting her mouth expression): 

Where are her hands, and what are they doing ?

[jone]

I hate to say this, but some women, who subscribe to Bolt-Ons are no different, hot or cold.  They always seem to stand at attention.

[LAman]

I'd like to say...I am for every country on those bodies!!!!