I got back from Russia last Wednesday and my wife is still in Russia. She wanted to stay 3 weeks and I chose to come back and work. I'm going back to Russia next week, and we will take that long journey back home together. Actually, I've done this trip so many times that it's normal to me. Even the ticket agent knows me in Russia. I flew with the new restrictions in place with respect to liquids, and it was no big deal. I just had to check my luggage with German beer on the way back. I always buy a few German beers to bring back.
Oksana and I spent 2 days in Germany on our way over, and she got to experience a buddy of mine driving 150 mi/hr on the freeway. We visited Heidelberg, which is a good tourist place to visit. I know a few people in Germany and they always take care of me when I'm there. We then flew to Russia, took a taxi, and I got to watch my wife in action negotiating the taxi ride. She turned down the first dude. I just watched the action.
I have not mentioned the "cultural shock" syndrome that many men have talked about, but I will now. My wife has been with me since Nov 2005 and I don't know what cultural shock is. She adjusted as if she had lived here before. There was no freaking out with America. There was no amazement that when you go to the store, you drive and you don't walk. There was no amazement with the mall and all the many stores that we have shopped in together. She is so aware of how much something costs that it amazes me. I'm a bigger spender than her. Oksana has been here with me almost 10 months and this "cultural shock" that has been talked about does not exist with us. Keep in mind that we have been married for 2 years: I did the K3, not the K1. Now, I know someone will try and tell me it will come but I can say that my wife has adjusted so good that I'm amazed. So, IMO, the cultural shock stuff is false, but that is my situation and doesn't mean another man's situation will be the same.
Here is a summary of what I did after my wife arrived.
I had to work during the week but I put forth an effort to make sure my wife didn't sit at home all day. Of course, it didn't make any difference because I told her she could make any changes to the home that she wants. Of course, I read DIY.com now and many books on the same subject. I'm busy when I'm not working. I put forth an effort to do things outside of the home and that does not include going to bars and restaurants. Although we have done those things occasionally, my wife dislikes restaurants and bars. I have eaten at home so much that restaurant food tastes like a saltshaker to me.
But, my wife took a placement test to see what ESL class she should enroll in. She started with Level II ESL and will be starting Level IV ESL when we get back from Russia. She finished Level II, and, in between semesters finished the book on her own before Level III. She studies very much. I help her when she has questions and I'm amazed at how little I know about English at an elementary level. Then again, she's asking questions about the apostrophe. So, here's one for you. If 2 boys are riding bikes and a sentence is about the 2 boys' bikes, is the apostrophe in the correct place when talking about the boy's bikes correct in the 1st usage of the apostrophe or the 2nd usage in this sentence?
I took her to school every Tuesday/Thursday during Level II and during summer school I took her to class 4 days a week. I studied my own subjects while she was in class during both semesters. But, I was with her at school because she can’t drive yet. Keep in mind, I worked all day and then took my wife to school. I can do this because I know how easy it is to waste time alone; Now, I spend my time doing something for my wife. I love it everyday. There are days when I'd rather sit at home and do nothing. But, I'm dedicated. I hope other men who pursue this route expect to give up their time away from work. When you're in love, you love it.
There's nothing spectacular about our visit back to Russia. Oksana's mom was in a different city and didn't arrive home until the next day. But, her sister was there. There was no jumping up and down because I haven't seen you. Of course, I implemented my American ways and started the hugs. Her mom is a hugger and was a little different when she arrived. Now I hope someone won't jump on my analysis implying only American's hug. So many people get offended nowadays, and frankly I don't care.
Mark
